How can my fiance and I split time equally between our kids?

Together my fiance and I have four kids, we both have split custody, so they are all here at the same time, but what are some things that we can do to give each child some alone time, and time with us one on one? What are somethings that we may be able to do to slow things down in the evenings, so everything isn’t so rushed and hectic?


Is that even possible with four kids??


So I only have 2, but something I have done with them since they were little is ‘dates’ they choose where they want to go, and it can just be like a milkshake and the park. But they have the opportunity to spend 1-1 time with us and during that time they can choose to discuss whatever they want. One piece of advice I will give you: listen to the little stories that bore you out of your mind, when the big things happen they will come to you then too. Trust me, I have an 18 yr old who asks me for advice about everything.


As a kid of parents with 4 kids I would have fun just going on a grocery shopping trip alone with my parents, enjoying just some one on one time in the car and being involved in helping pick and choose the groceries we got made me feel very important/special! As for slowing things down in the evening that never happened :joy: unless we had a family movie night or board games but that really depends on the age of your kids​:blush: as they get older I think things slow down more. Good luck yall!!

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Maybe do a boardgame night? Or cards.
I can’t really speak from experience, I only have 1 child myself.
But also, shadow puppets.
As long as they are involved in whatever you choose… They will be happy.

I don’t think you’re going to be able to fairly plan one on one. I think the key is to just be sure you’re equally attentive during group activities.

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Bedtime stories, an after dinner walk, inspirational notes to each, a project (building models, puzzles, video games).

You have 4 kids so the first thing to accept is that life is going to be hectic. With regard to alone time, just make it. Take one kid shopping or for a walk or whatever it is they like. Take another kid the other day. Dedicate a day/night to family game night or movie night. And understand that alone time between you and your fiancé will be limited until your kids are grown and gone

I have 4. We do special little things with everyone. The other day my husband just needed to run to town to pick up medicine he took one of our kids and stopped at taco Bell and spent an extra 30 minutes with her just talking about what she wanted to talk about. My two older girls have dance one separate days, so they get that one on one on the ride there and back. Sometimes well stop and get a treat sometimes we don’t. My boy loves video games so we try to play with him every once in awhile for some one on one. My youngest isn’t in school so she gets all the time until the big kids get home. You just make the time for them.

I’ve only got 3. But what is this one on one time you speak of? Lol. I’d love 5 minutes to poop in peace! Don’t know how to do one on one time

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For the holiday take candy canes hang (hide) them outside and make it a treasure hunt for the family or you could do a one on one with each one with it. Read a book at night to all of the kids before bedtime. Also before each one goes to sleep at night kneel beside each other and say a good night prayer with each one. That would give you some one on one time with each one before bed.

I like the idea someone said about dates with your kids, that’s a great idea. Just make sure one on one time is spent with his kids too, not just yours.

Rotate the kids so each gets time with each of you while the other one tames the chaos with the other 3. Kid 1+ mom, kid 2+ dad, kid 3+ mom, kid 4 + dad, kid 1 + dad, kid 2 + mom, kid 3 + dad, kid 4 + mom. You can do anything with each child as long as you get them out of the house.

I try to take each of my kids on “dates”. Whether it’s the movies, lunch, dinner, etc.

Rotate dates. Plan the week. A friend of mine who is a mother of 6 children makes sure she does certain things with each kid. Laundry is with 1, date nights/after schools each day of the week, movie night as a whole, baseball games etc.

Group game, one on one reading time book of choice

Have family game nights. Have the kids help one of you set table for dinner while the other kids help get a movie night set up.

At meal time we go around the dinner table and we all say something we enjoyed about the day and something we learned or did. Reading individually with each one for ten minutes? Take turns running errands one on one?


I am a single mother with four kids and I will take one with me on different errands or have one help me with a chore.

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I have 5 children. When my girls ( now adults) were small… We would have different activities. Usually during the evening hours after dinner… We would do family game night, movie night, bake cookies one night, I’d buy color posters and markers and we’d all sit down and color. On the weekends we did outings … Flea market, Zoo, picnic in the park, during the summer we would go to the beach or community pool. One evening do a family stroll around the block.

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