Stay at home, mamas- HOW do you afford it?! Especially wondering for those of you whose husbands don’t make that much money. I just don’t understand how it is possible with a mortgage, bills, etc, and I want in!
Mines called backpay and disability
My husband does have a good job. Otherwise we couldn’t afford it. He works a ton of hours 7 days a week though too.
We don’t. Which is why I’ve put in 40+ applications, but so far have come up with nothing.
Following! My husband would like me to be a stay at home mom (which I am fine with trying!) but I look at our finances and don’t see how it’s possible!
Not everyone can. You have to have a partner that has a good enough paying job to afford to pay for everything alone.
My husband and I have saved and worked hard to get to a position that allows me to raise our children. We tackle debt with the snowball affect. We pay off smaller bills when we have extra money. We don’t do credit cards and we primarily pay for things with cash. Our house is paid off too. I will say he’s a hardworking man who has always worked 40+ hours to give us this life.
Your husband has to make enough to support the family. Cut all extras. A lot of SAHM will try to watch someone else’s kid for extra money or some kind of side hustle that can be done at home
Create a budget, see if it’s possible one income…cut expenses whenever possible. If you don’t NEED it, get rid of it.
My husband makes a decent amount. Enough to cover all the bills. We don’t have fancy things but we are fine with that. Childcare for 6 kids would be really expensive anyways.
Same way a single parent without child support Does it. The other half has to bust their ass, hustle, and support that family without excuses🤷🏽♀️
We budget budget budget. My husband has a good job but works 60 hour weeks so it’s hard with him being gone a lot, but for us it’s worth it so our son doesn’t have to be in daycare. We changed to a smaller cell phone plan, changed car insurance, dropped cable and did netflix & Hulu, etc. Small stuff like that can add up quick.
I don’t, but I also couldn’t afford daycare. Just waiting for the opportunity to move somewhere cheaper and downsize our bills.
I think the only reason I am able to saty home is because our home has no mortgage and our cars are inexpensive
My husband and I own our own painting business and I have my own business grooming dogs at my home. I’ve been a stay at home mom for almost 4 years now. It’s not easy.
We are a family of 5 about to be family of 6 and we live off my husbands job of $15 an hr with no government help. It’s all about budgeting and living within your means. We don’t get to do lots of extra stuff and buy fancy things etc… but that’s okay for me. We had a ton of extra cash when we both worked but spent so much money on childcare it was ridiculous. I have loved staying home and look forward to it when this baby comes.
Drive an older car, only have one car, don’t eat out, buy clothes at second hand or swap with friends, no nail salons, no ca bl le tv, read books, play games, do crafts, cook, etc.
My husband has a pretty decent paying job, I balance the “bill book” every month and have so many bills set to each check (he’s paid weekly) there isn’t a huge amount of extra money so things that are not needed we live without. However I did the math and we save more money with me not working then sending the little to daycare and not having someone home to help the oldest with school work.
My husband has a pretty good job and is offered a LOT of over time. He also is 80% disabled with the VA which helps tremendously.
We moved in with my parents
It would cost more to have my kids in daycare than I’d make lol
I do not have any post secondary and id like to do that once my youngest is in school full time. Making minimum wage would not be worth the time away, id be paying just to have them there. I am a mom of 4 boys. My husband did University when our older boys were small so he makes a enough to support our lives. We could be doing better financially but we get by just fine. Our youngest is just about 2.5yo.
I had 2 at home, and jobs that I qualified for, didn’t pay enough for daycare. I learned to bake bread, make laundry detergent, lotion, etc.,I started growing my own food. I grew leaf lettuce in my windowsill year round for my lunches, and grew a garden in the summer. Occasional weekend vendor shows with homemade goodies (honestly that was more for me, to get out of the house). Shopping in bulk and freezing what I could. Buying things that I can freeze while they are on sale (ex: butter, usually $4.39lb, sale price 2 for $4, I clean the shelf, same with cheese, and meats). Just be sure to rotate your food storage. I
For me, it wasn’t that I could afford to do it as much as I couldn’t afford not to! 2 littles in daycare was going to cost me $360 per week minimum, plus all the expenses of a daily commute. I would have been working just to afford to work AND missing out on that time with my babies. It wasn’t worth it. So we had to buckle down and budget. We’d also always lived practically: small house payment and no car payment went a long way until my youngest started public school and I went back to work.
Budget, sacrifice wants/needs and thrifting
I’m kinda new to the SAHM thing (thanks covid), but it honestly comes down to 2 things. Does your partner make enough to cover everything?- and I mean literally everything. And how much are you willing to cut back on or even give up if necessary. It’s not easy on any of us, unless your partner brings in a whole lot of money. Even then prepare for the mental/emotional toll you will have and for them to be working a lot.
Find a better job. They are out there but he has to look.
We couldn’t afford not to have one of us stay home. I have more credentials so I work he stays home. Works great
Muna Sheekh Maxamud its hard to balance everywhere with kids and working parents
Budget everything. Save every coin you can even pennies. My husband an i have $30 in coins right now that we wouldnt have if we didnt care about them.
If you can go without certain things then do it. We only have netflix and disney+ for our kids we cut the others.
We have prepaid phones so if we cant do it one week were ok till the next. Turn lights off when not using them.
When you have extra either put it away or pay off a smaller bill to help get out of debt if you have any
We save our taxes to pay rent for the year
You have to sacrifice in certain areas of your life to benefit in other areas.
Instead of having two cars you only have one car. You don’t live in a fancy apartment you get a less expensive apartment. It’s all about budgeting.
We don’t eat out but very rarely, eat lots of leftovers and he packs his lunch and takes 2 giant mugs of tea with him.
I cloth diaper and nurse our daughter.
Only have 1 vehicle, for now
Budgeting. I ended up starting an inhome daycare to make a little extra
There are a lot of work from home jobs now because of covid. I got 3 job offers in 1 week. Look into it.
I stay at home my husband is a heavy hauler makes 22 a hour… its rough sometimes but not really were doing it paying all bills maybe not on time right now but we was
My husbands an IBEW electrician
You could work on his days off or alternate shifts, that way you can both be home with the kids and both bring in some income.
Husband has a Good paying stable job, budgeting, and planning/saving.
It’s not glamorous by any means and my husband is the most responsible person I know.
You might not get everything you once had when both were working.
Hair done, nails done, facials, etc are all things you either learn to do yourself or can sacrifice it. Don’t eat out often; actually, hardly ever. Pay your mortgage and all your bills first, in full- what you have left still should mostly go to savings.
It’s really all about how much you can sacrifice.
I worked right up until the doctor released me when I was pregnant. Took my maternity leave & was planning on going back to work till covid happened and no childcare places were open. We have a baby & he has a 7 and 10 year old from a pervious marriage. My husband does make good for northeast Alabama so we are thankful for that.
We have no vehicle payments. He has a truck & I have a car. Don’t use a credit card. We are working on refinancing to lower our mortgage payment. We don’t eat out at restaurants as a family. We only have internet, no cable or satalite. Buy for Christmas, birthdays and such, whenever you find sales. Not when it’s the “season” for it. STAY OUT OF DEBT. DEBT IS THE ENEMY. I will have to go back to work eventually, but when my son is in school. Use the tax breaks to your advantage each tax time. Save or pay off debt(s). Me and my husband never really buy clothes unless we must for a specific reason. I buy the kids nice, but used clothes. I buy all baby stuff used & buy diapers and wipes in bulk to save. Kids all wear new shoes and are well fed. They don’t have a cell phone as a lot of kids do but we will never get them a cell phine. If they want a phone, they can pay for it themselves one day.
I’m a SAHM but am able to work early mornings before my kids wake up! I teach English online. Let me know if you’re interested, I’d be able to help you with the application process if you’d like
I’ve been a SAHM for over 10 years…I don’t know how it is in America, or other countries, but in South Africa, we have wholesalers… You don’t have to buy in bulk at the store I go to, all the items are sold “loose” too… So it’s really where you shop… Example, this one marinade sauce I love costs R36, but at the normal grocery store it costs R50… I save so much money… And our milk for example I buy straight from Parmalat, a 6 pack milk costs R75 at the least at a store, I pay R60… So if you can shop smart, you save a ton of money…
My husband works and pays the bills that simple!
I got creative and sick and tired of being broke so I started selling weight loss tea and shapewear etc and I became my own boss all I did was stories on Instagram
We’re very blessed my husband has a good paying job
We just don’t live a glamorous lifestyle and aren’t afraid to live in a trailer as opposed to an expensive apartment or house. We have our needs met and save a little each week to be able to take trips after a few months or buy some “wants” (games, clothes we like, decorations etc) and I do our budget weekly if not more to make sure we stay on track in the beginning we made cuts like no internet no phone plans no car payments but now we have all of that because we budget cautiously. It’s doable if you don’t want a fancy life. If you need all the bells and whistles then your husband will have to be able to work a super good paying job.
well when it comes to me I’m not a regular stay at home mom. Yes I’m a stay-at-home mom but my husband has jobs like cutting down trees or trimming the trees or cutting down the palm trees or turning the palm trees or cutting the yard or remodeling or rebuilding people’s homes or Building kitchen cabinets whatever it may be. And I am usually there on the job with him doing these jobs. While our child is in school. sometimes he makes decent money sometimes he doesn’t if it’s raining outside of course we can’t make no money. So that means when tropical storms and hurricanes approach toward Florida we can’t work. or any other rainy day so that leaves us that day not making any money. We get food stamps. We do not have cable and we do not have regular internet. We however have our family plan on our cell phones and a hotspot and a Chromecast we take the Chromecast hope you out to our hotspot and then we do what you call near Imaging from the phone to the big screen TV that way we can watch sling TV Netflix Disney Plus Hulu Vudu whatever it may be. My husband and I do the work thing together and pay bills together and then we come home and cook and clean together and help take care of our kids together. My husband also has responsibilities at home that require me to be with him to help like we are building a bedroom on to our camper because hurricane Michael took our home two years ago and we still have not recovered. It is very hard at times like right now we are approaching Thanksgiving after Halloween and starting Christmas. Which of course we don’t have much this year. Thank the Lord my daughter does not want much but a good set of headphones and a couple other things along those lines because she does not play with toys Barbies anymore. But she has to have other things. Anyways we make it work no matter what and there are days that we need help with friends or family on food or gas money or something like that. We rely on food pantries and churches we go to clothes closets if we get to where we need a couple pairs of clothes or something for school and we don’t have a lot of money or we can’t find any like right now my daughter is in between sizes and it’s really hard to find what I need unless I go to a Goodwill or consignment shop or a Clothes Closet. But if it wasn’t for food stamps we would really have a hard time. I am currently trying to help my husband with income I’m trying to find people who will let me clean their houses because I’ve only had one real job in my life other than that I’ve been you know like I have been with my husband all these years but it’s getting to where now I think I should start either finding me a real job or trying to get it to where I can clean houses and things like that. Who knows what’s around the corner everyday is a brand new day for something amazing to happen and for the Lord to open a new door and something be good find it and that’s the way I look at that
Ultimately, it’s cheaper to stay at home than it would be to pay for day care.
Now is the perfect time to find a WFH job whether it be part time or not. Meal planning and shopping based on the ads with coupons is big too. Then use the discounts from shopping on gas for your vehicles(s). Sell on swap pages or marketplace things you dont use or need anymore. This will help keep you clutter free as well. Also, dont be afraid to use food options in your community like Harvesters if you need to. A lot of SAHMs also provide childcare for others as a side job.
My husband got a FIFO job it’s means financially we are secure enough that I get to be home with the kids but he is away for weeks at a time
Sacrifice and being flexible. Live below your means if you can. Find help from the government. Find a side hustle you can do from home.
For us: we live in a decently priced apartment in Colorado. My fiancé has changed jobs often just to follow the money, like right now he’s making less than $15/hr which is barely paying rent. He moved to that job from an 11/hr job. Now he’s looking for a higher paying job with more hours. He gained a LOT of experience as a cook and is going to school.
I get child support from my kids father so that pays for the basics, what the kids need like shoes and pays for internet/Hulu/Disney+/Netflix and my car payment and insurance. We get food stamps to help with our grocery bill, and getting help with getting our energy bill paid for a few months during winter.
How else we make it work: I stay home with the kids during the day and on my SO’s days off I go out and doordash and instacart. I also resell items on eBay and posh mark. Free shipping supplies from the post office, I pick up free items from marketplace and craigslist (like printer ink!) and make money that way.
We have used cars, our apartment is nice but definitely not a brand new property, we budget our food, we use Cricket for our phone plans which we paid up front for our phones and monthly bill is $35 each. We only go to places on free days like the zoo, farms, museums. Not this year but otherwise lol.
If there’s a will there’s a way.
When my older 4 were young(I was newly divorced with 4 kids 4and under &no child support or help). I babysit around the clock for the state (lived in Illinois at the time) and made amazing $$! I literally had kids 24/7/365. Yes…I had kids on holidays. They became part of our family. I had extra kids ages 13 down to 6weeks. Between the pay, meal programs and tax deductions…
we lived really good.
If your husband has an average job and you want a super expensive house with the best car, and the newest phones and your nails done every week it’s probably NOT going to be possible for you.
If you’re keen on living modestly but still having your child’s needs be met, maybe it is. All about priorities, really.
It can also be hard to get out of these things when you have them due to financial obligations you have already incurred.
Add up the amount your husband makes + what you currently spend on daycare and subtract your necessary expenses, and see what you have left over.
It’s a struggle and hard got to go without things and move stuff around and make sure bills are paid and work with what little you have left over after bills but you have to give up a lot and shop cheap
My husband has a very good paying job. Otherwise, I’d have to work.
We work on a cash base. Narrow down wants vs nessicities. Theres been a few times i pick up babysitting to help cover diapers or gas whatever it maybe. But the 1st step is to eliminate unnecessary spending and budget! Budget every penny that comes home.
We sold our house, moved somewhere cheaper and downsized. My partner was also able to take 61 weeks of paternity leave because of this so both of us can be home with the baby. We’re taking advantage of the time off by building a house and some rental cabins so I can continue to be a SAHM while bringing in some income.
We honestly couldnt if he didn’t make what he does.
I also garden, can, meal plan, only shop every 2 weeks on payday, limit errands to shopping day as well to save on fuel. We live out in the country, have chickens and do all our own repairs and Maintenance.
Shop none food items and clothes off season and shop thrifty.
I also started selling my art online a couple of years ago just to help wity my meds and extras.
Honestly we just couldn’t afford the daycare it wasn’t worth for all of what I would be making to go into daycare my husband would try and get any overtime possible but it wasn’t worth what we would have to pay for someone else to care for our babies.
Honestly good planning, especially if your husband doesn’t have the greatest paying job as you said. When I first started being a stay at home mom all of the money I had made from work was mostly just for fun money, so we knew we could already afford all our bills on just my husbands income. But it wasn’t easy at first and still even now we have times where it’s tight but we have a “pay calendar” where we plan out all the bills and the pay day that lines up the closest and then the bills before or when they are due. We have it lined up to where we have “fun money” on the third weekend of every month and that’s just how ours line up, however I wish we had this plan in place before hand but it has worked out! Good luck I hope you all can work it out if it’s what you want!
So I’m not a stay at home mom, but I’m a single mom with a household to maintain. It all comes down to budgeting and being tight with your money. I carefully plan out how my money will be spent, when I pay bills vs when I get paid, and how to save money constantly.
Daycare for 2 was too expensive. It was financially easier to be a sahm. Now that the kids are in school, im happier being able to go back to work. Being a sahm is not always easy by a long shot.
My husband and I both work full time. He works days and I work overnights to avoid daycare costs. It’s hard and not for everyone but it helps so much because we could never afford daycare with everything else. Gives us time to miss each other too lol.
My husband works making $25 an hour. He is seasonal so from November until April it is tight like really tight. I just literally budget food and bills come first we do not go to fun places often for the kids but we take a 12 day vacation to the beach every July. We live good during the spring and summer months but after he gets laid off it sucks we just are stuck in most days. We live in Pennsylvania and have a mortgage and car payment we do not live above our means ever. You live what you can afford to live or else you end up in too much debt
We have 3 kids and they are well taken care of and provided for. It is possible. We also get no government assistance.
Work from home. I did babysitting for couple of years, Well our kids were younger, because we would have had to work 2 jobs each to to pay for child care and get ahead. Theres lots of jobs you can do from home. Aldo Say good by to eating out, getting your hair and nails done, And whatever other luxury you enjoy. Downsize to the cheapest place you can get.
My mom would work when we were at school… only part time but was income. Over summer she babysat so she wasnt just depending on hos income.
It was more that we couldn’t afford them to go to daycare and work. One of us would be working 40 hrs a week to bring home around $100 while paying almost $500 a week.
For extra money I’d work temp agency jobs, usually 2nd or 3rd shift jobs. I’d get burnt out but the jobs were only about a month or so long then I’d get a break for a while until I found another one.
I have a bachelors degree in legal studies but I work in warehouses or mental health overnights.
When my daughter was a newborn and it was feasible to work, I’d coupon A LOT, I breast fed when it was possible and did cloth diapers to save money. I had more time than money so I made it work.
My dude has a decent job. Thankfully that helps but were still struggling. I’d love to go back to work. I kinda miss my alone time. But my youngest is now 2 and with the way the world is I’m scared to put him in daycare
I’ve been a SAHM for 3 yrs now, waiting for my son to go to school so I can get a job. My husband makes 12 something an hour plus gets one monthly commission (average is 1200) we are really tight, the only reason we can make it work is because A. I bought my house 10 yrs ago in auction and paid it off 6 yrs later (I worked like 75 hour weeks and had a roommate) i bought my truck 5 yrs ago and paid it off last yr. I know not a lot of people can accomplish these things, I’ve been lucky. It wouldn’t be possible if not for those things, a mortgage and another car payment would not be feasible with me not working. I dont know how anyone does it honestly. I’ve been dying to get back to work (I’ve been working since I was 13, im 32) but childcare costs so much id just be working to pay for childcare and gas and that’s not worth it to me.
I can’t afford to be a working mom. We don’t make much with his income, but if I went to work we’d make even less cause we have 3 going on 4 kids and daycare would cost me more than I’d bring in.
My bf works like crazy and I work at home when I can. I have kids doing school at home so don’t really have a choice
My guy is a mechanic doesn’t make but 12 and hour but I make 1150 we let him take over all the Bill’s this year to see if it was a possibility. And it is. Our house is a trailer and it’s only 511 a month so it’s less than 900 to live where we are at
Extreme budgeting! It’s uncomfortable at times but it means I get to watch my babies grow up x
My husband has a decent job but honestly for us, me working was never an option because child care is too expensive I would literally work to pay for that and gas to and from. I budget and I am strict about what goes out. All necessities get paid first. I buy my groceries 2weeks to a month. I meal plan and prep so I don’t spend extra on food. I buy what I can in bulk and with coupons. I never pay full price for anything. Second hand or clothes that are on sale. We have 3 kids and 2 dogs. You need to look at your needs and see if your husband can cover all of them or if you work do a full month of not including your income and see if it is even possible. It takes work to stay on budget so are you willing to cut out things out that’s are not needed?
It’s actually cheaper for me to stay at home than to work and put the kids in daycare. Even with just 1 child day care was still too expensive. My husband makes decent money for where we live, we just budget and meal plan to afford the comfortable life we live.
Each week his pay check is spent like this: bills, groceries, savings, his gas for the week, and then whatever is left we can do with what we like.
Daycare is expensive af. There is no way I’d be able to go back to work until all of the kids are in school. My fiance busts his ass everyday to provide for us though. We don’t go out to eat, we don’t have internet, we don’t go spend money on things we don’t need. It’s bills, kids, and neccessaties. I’ll be glad to be able to go back to work to take some weight off of my man though. He does so much for us
You’re spouse needs to make up the money you’re not making or make crafts and sell them on market place to supplement mommy income
Been a stay at home mom for going on 6 years . And never struggle. But I’m also not spending all of the money he brings home on stupid stuff we don’t need . And I’m fixin to have my third child in 4 months . No food stamps and we do good off of one income . I’m actually the saving account .
Sorry but not speaking from experience. My husband makes a good paycheck and is very frugal in general. We can afford a comfortable life thanks to him. But I know from hearing from other moms (if extreme budgeting doesn’t work) some SAHMs do part time work to help with the bills. If your husband’s job is shifts I know some couples who both do shift work so both can work but they don’t have to pay for childcare.
Been a stay at home mom for almost 20 years now. Can’t say it’s been easy. We live by a simple mantra, A penny saved is a penny earned. Every dollar I save is just the same as if I had a job and payed for it, so carful budgeting and shopping is very important. Also you don’t have to “have a job” to help put food on the table. I started with a small garden and now have a nice sized one that helps me feed the family. We started with the basics; fruits and berries that would never need replanting, salad stuff, peas , green beans, carrots, things like that.
I am a stay at home mum. We are surviving on one student loan as my partner is in school. We don’t have anyone working! And surviving off a single persons student loan! I can’t believe it. But its not easy! Lots of sacrisfising. But the true answer is no debt. We had no debt prior. And we know my partner will pay the loans for school off within the first year of work after he is done. We have a budget every week for groceries. And we don’t eat out ever… We only use our car once a week, and bike everywhere ( Sweden has bike trails literally everywhere) . we always put a tiny bit of money away every so often to have essentially an “emergency fund”. We don’t buy things we don’t absolutely need either. And we do everything ourselves . changing winter tires, oil changes. Biking kids to school every morning. Fixing bikes… No secrets, just hardwork I suppose.
Honestly because if I worked it wouldn’t even cover day care. We go without on a lot of things and only buy necessities.
Meal planning, budget, sell things you don’t need anymore and save that money, get a calender and write down all your bills and their due dates, pay off small debts as soon as you can, direct deposit a small chunk of money into a separate savings if you can (we do 25$ each week).