Um if it’s that bad. Just leave ASAP it won’t get better. Your guy should put you first.
Tell them to back off and mind their own. Trust me you have to stand your ground!!
I’d give them each a tent as soon as they walked through door, and saying something like, if you intend or not to upset me, and stress me out, I will be asking you to pitch your tent up and bloody well use it, I am so lucky to not have to deal with this
They will end up alienating their son and you and their grandchild
It’s your fiance’s family he needs to set boundaries if he doesn’t you need to say something and then you will be the 'daughter in law ’ from hell … !
You and your husband need to learn the word no, and consequences for actions
Boundaries. If they don’t like them then they can go.
Buy good locks for your doors. Tell your fiance you need help. Make him listen, get friends/family to rally for you and help you stand up for yourself. Talk to your doctor about your concerns and make sure you’re watching for PPD and PPA
Your partner needs to tell them to back off as you are pregnant and as you no major stress is no good for you or the baby. If you keep giving in they will continue to push you as they know they can break you down. Sit down with your man and tell him everything and that he needs to help you deal with them or you don’t want them around so much.
we can’t help you, you need to stand up to them & tell them, enough is enough, And what about your husband??? Tell him it’s time for him to be a man & husband & help you with this
Your fiancé needs to step up to the plate and be your hero, it is his parents And he needs to take matters into his own hand and support you and your child
Boundaries boundaries boundaries. What you allow will continue. Stand up to them.
Lock your doors!! Ignore calls and texts. It is perfectly okay to cut people off and put your foot down!
I wouldn’t answer the door and if they had a key change locks post rules on your do
I think the first thing you should do is to show them you are strong… your house your rules! If you let them do what they want, obviously they will continue to do it. If you said No mean it. Talk with your husband and agree between you two. To stick to your own rules.
Stand up for yourself and put you foot down.
The hell you do not need to deal with that. You are a grown adult it’s your house that you take care of it’s your way also your child not theirs put your foot down or dip out.
Set boundaries and be firm!
If you allow it they will always take advantage of you! It is okay to set boundaries with the fiancé as well! Once you stand up for yourself you will feel so much better momma, and it will get easier.
Oh well you put up with it thats one thing I would never ever allow in my house is someone cming in and making themselves at home fck NO I don’t care who it is and I have no problem whatsoever telling whoever to fck off
I wouldn’t put up with it wheather its my family his family or friends…
My mother in law would walk into my house. Lock your doors. Ignore phone calls
It won’t stop until your fiance sets his foot down hun… I’m in the same boat and it’s finally eased up some…its stressful, especially the holidays, I’m due for a cesaren and tubal on December 13 with twins and I have been told I am 'expected ’ to be at Christmas day brunch… nope not going…told them that they were not happy and still kept on and on. So when Christmas day comes they will see me and my infant twins who are less that 2 weeks old will not be there. I told my fiance if they can’t understand this will be child number 4 and 5 and I will be taking care of my older kids as well,can’t run after them and healing up and for once don’t want to be around 20 or more people fighting for a seat to set other than the floor than that’s fine. I’ll spend Christmas with just me and my babies
Tell them Dr. Says that you need to not be exposed to any viruses and you must rest during this pregnancy. Tell them he suggests if anyone comes over, that they will be needed to clean; sweep, vacummn, mop, help with laundry, buying groceries and cook for you, while there. No loud TV.
That should keep most at Bay!
Honey I left a man house I love and had the most amazing sex with because his mom lived there and I am not about to walk on eggshells or coerced into anything makes me uncomfortable. And I am a live in babysitter for my grand kids. So he childishly retaliated (I guess) saying he couldn’t be around my family. I simply said I understand. And that was that. I still love him and always will. But loving someone doesn’t mean you have to be pushed to the point you are in. I’m speaking from experience because you caved once your absolutely right it’s only going to get worse and your life will not be your own.
You sure you want to marry into this family, and them into yours? This how you want to spend your life? Always make sure you love the family as much as the spouse, and they love you back. Especially if they are close. It’s going to cause unnecessary tension on their relationships, also. Just…. Think before you walk down that isle.
Make boundaries and stick with them.
We can’t help you, you have to stand up and take charge. People only do what you allow. Stop the craziness now because believe me, with the baby coming, it will only get worse.
what about your other half - get them to tell parents to butt out
No is a complete sentence. Tell them no and if they don’t respect your no, cut them off
Set your boundaries now. Put your foot down, that is your house your space and they causing you more stress than you need. Tell them if they cant respect your boundaries then they can not be around or in your house until they can!
Stand up for yourself.
You need to tell your finance to put his foot down and if he won’t you need to do what’s best for you and your baby and leave till he can be a man
Ur partner should be putting their foot down while u relax and enjoy ur pregnancy.
It’s easy respect the rules and everything u put in place if they can’t cut them all off and Pretend they don’t Exist
I had to have a serious talk with my fiance about holding our parents at arms length. We are 24 and 25 year old adults, and it doesn’t matter what they have to say or think about it, this is how we’ve decided to live our lives and raise our children.
Unfortunately, neither side agrees with us. So we keep our distance, and keep things sane. Minimal conversations, minimal time spent outside of family gatherings like Thanksgiving, etc. We just don’t have the energy to battle the rest of the world and stay strong together.
Just say no and set boundaries.
Tell your partner to man the he’ll up and stand his ground.
If they don’t respect it then cut your ties.
Go get Therapy for You and your baby sake!! And don’t tell no one until you get it under control with Yourself it is Definitely Wrong what you and the baby:heart:are going through! Best of Luck Stay Strong!
Be sure your doors are locked, don’t be afraid to call police, tell your fiance about how you feel, how it’s making you feel, ect & then put your foot down to your In-laws!
ur house ur rules if they cant abide f of
My fiances family is drama and it took 3 years for my fiance to put his foot down. Now we only associate with his dad and step mom. Can’t stand drama at all and thats what they are. Im sorry your going throuh this
Quit giving into them. That’s why they push it, because they know y’all will give in eventually. You have to set boundaries and stick to them.
He needs to put his parents in check. You stick to your boundaries. If they cannot help themselves that much, then I would tell them since they cannot respect you, then they have no business being in your home or life period until they can control themselves. It is about you and baby. Not them.
If your partner is not on your team…… you need to remove yourself from all of them.
Who cares if they dislike you, or hate you, or talk bad about you.
That is your house. Those are your rules. They need to stop.
And why the heck isn’t your partner stepping in and telling them tho? That’s ridiculous.
Your husband picked YOU to build a life with. Not them. He needs to continue to pick you every day.
If he can’t do that…. Leave. You do not need all of that drama and stress in your life and your babies.
You have to be firm and explicit about what you want. You look them in the eye and say: never come to my home without an invitation from me.
Just do you be happy because life is a blessing and roll with it . Make sure you give them a clear clean up plan .
You aren’t alone, but damn stand up for yourself. You have a voice use it! Don’t let them make you miserable in your own home. I would be letting my spouse know either shape up or ship out along with his family.
You have to stand up to them. Don’t let them make you feel guilty. And your fiance should stand up to them. That’s the only way to make it stop.
Tell your fiancé to grow some balls and tell his family to back off
Have boundaries. In any situation where people are crossing the line, or making you feel uncomfortable and s pressured. And when it’s hard, remember you’re setting an example for your kids.
I could never tolerate this behavior set BOUNDARIES or else they will set them for you. Stand the hell up for yourself don’t be a door mat. It’s your house it doesn’t matter if they’re family you don’t want them there then speak up loud and clear. It’s a little overwhelming at first but once you do it you are going to feel all that power you have in yourself. Don’t let anyone make you this way.
Sweetie first -you need to take charge of your life. Your fiancé and you need to communicate with each other and establish what is acceptable and what’s not. Before your baby comes. Lock your doors - tell them it’s your house your rules - just like their house their rules. You two need to stick together on this - this is part of building the foundation of your relationship- trust, responsibility, loyalty, and accountability are the four pillars of any relationship of the heart and mind.
Also you need to say NO and mean it.
If you don’t start putting your foot down, the situations won’t change.
Welcome who they invited into your home. But make it clear, you were not aware. So next time, tell them to reach out to you directly if they need a place to stay.
Also, your husband needs to have a conversation with them alone about respecting your space!
my father in law was awful but my mother-in-law was a angel … had to take the good with the bad but id do it all over again …
Set boundaries now. You have got to and stick to them.
Have a talk with ur fiance. Tell him he needs to man up and remind them their place. I was in a similar situation. My in laws told everyone my first baby would carry their name since they’re paternal grandparents. (Bf was adopted by step dad so his name is different from theirs) I told them hell no. They tried to push so I said “Brian doesnt have to b on the birth certificate” they got quiet. Kids carry bfs name but they think since we not married they carry mine they bought some land and wanted to open an RV campground. They know I have a camper on my family’s property so they said theyd take it out there and rent it out too. I told them the renter would pay me 700 per month and they also would pay me 700 per month since they never asked my permission. And any damage would b their financial responsibility when they declined my conditions I got in their face and told then “then dont EVER volunteer MY shit for anything and dont EVER presume to think u have ANY authority over any aspect of my life” my first baby is 2&1/2 and theyve seen him maybe 5 times. My second maybe 3 or 4 times and my 3rd only once. They’ve never actually held any of my children. If they dont respect me they have no place in my childrens lives.
If u are unable to set boundaries, like me. Take advantage of them. Cooking, cleaning etc…
Honey I’d fake a Covid scare and “quarantine” for those two weeks and the family member will have to be situated elsewhere.
your husband needs to put them in their place…if he dosen’t… is he even mature enough to protect a child?
Listen u take care of u and tell them to STFU its ur house
…I can’t imagine that this behavior is out of the blue for you, if you’re engaged then you knew what they were like before you said, yes. So it’s a conversation you should have had with you partner before you got pregnant and tied yourself to him for the next 18yrs. I do however think that it may have a lot to do with your pregnancy hormones and fatigue, you could be lacking in iron so talk to your doctor.
I’ve been there. My husband is awful at setting boundaries so that wasn’t ever an option (I BEGGED FOR YEARS) We are two different religions and cultures and it was awful at first. Sometimes it is hard to understand why people behave the way they do. It’s all how you were brought up and things maybe they don’t realize are offensive are extremely offensive to you. Flip the script. Next year invite whoever you want to their place. You may find yourself shocked and even secretly want to take a page from their book. I’ve been with my husband 7 years and the first 3 were so hard. Sometimes even after having kids things were hard but as time went on I began to understand them better and even adopted some of their mannerisms. Be patient take a step back. If they aren’t losing any sleep over their behavior why should you?
All i read was “how do i deal with awful inlaws” you dont thats you’re spouses people and you’re spouses obligation to check them! If you’re spouse does not handle the situation accordingly than you must or it will never end
Get out of that situation . Leave and start your life over period.
I am actually going through the same issue. It is called boundaries!
Put up the Rules right now!
Put your foot down!
I am so tired of being disrespected in my own house.
It needs to STOP now.
I am so done dealing with it.
I am proud of my own daughter for buying a house and setting up boundaries for everyone.
I have to make an appointment to see my Grandchildren.
Put your foot down and put them in their place. It is YOUR house and not theirs. YOUR CHILD, not theirs. Talk with your hubby and come up with a plan to set boundaries. Tell thrm that if they can’t follow boundaries, then they won’t be welcome in your home.
He needs to stand up to them!
Tell them to get the hell out of your house and don’t come back until I invite you
It’s your man that needs to put them in their place. If he doesn’t, you’ll end up destroying your relationship.
What happens in your own home and with your family begins and ends with you and your husband. You need to work it out with him. If he doesn’t understand how upset this makes you then you move to the next step and fix that marriage right now before the baby comes. Or this marriage isn’t going to survive. Respect is key.
Talk to your husband and set some BOUNDERIES . Your life should be full of positivity . Make sure you are using clear and healthy communication.
Go on a Vacation when they show up don’t be there. Go to friends family. MOVE AWAY FROM THEM
Look into the “narcissistic family cult dynamic” there’s a lady on tiktok who has a whole account dedicated to it.
First off if you haven’t spoken to your fiancé about it, then you need to. If you spoke to him and he will do nothing to help remedy the situation then you really need to ask yourself if you want that marriage…because if you marry into that then that is what you are choosing to put up with…You still have time to change your mind, think long and hard…
My God I get this so much… I’m in the middle of the divorce and they are being completely out of line and even my soon to be ex (we are friendly) was like what has gotten into them. (mind you that I have been dealing with them constantly being like this and it was bound to happen) His mom kept on throwing biblical verses at me and I eventually called her David Koresh lol he laughed at it. Their religion is based 7th Day Adventist and it was the basis of the group. The moral of the story if that they just need to be told that they can either come or not and they need to figure out how to see eye to eye with you. You need to establish this now or you will be stuck in this emotional limbo the entire time your are in the relationship with your fiance.
Whether it’s family or not you are allowed to have boundaries. Even if it is your family.
Tell them your very sorry but your supposed
To be resting and getting ready for baby to come
So u have to cancel.
And start saying no when u need to!
Learn this phrase
Would like to, but can’t …
Don’t add anything, don’t give in. Just say, sorry, but NO !!!
Seems like they just wanna spend time with you guys. Why does that bother you so much. They could be awful and hate your guts. Count your blessings and choose your battles.
You better stop it now before you give birth, or they will be at your house to help with the baby supposedly. That is the time when you and the father need to bond with the baby. Put a stop to it now.
You have to set boundaries and expect to make people mad and hurt their feelings in return. They don’t exist unless you allow them to!
Ignore them. 110%
It’s your home and your life. I understand not wanting to rock the boat. But you have to to have a healthy relationship. You cannot let them dictate.
It’s YOUR life.
Why you complaining here? Tell your bf to put on his big boy pants and tell his parents enough is enough. Lock your door so they can’t come in . Tell them they have to call first or be invited. This is your bf and your life not theirs. They have to follow guideline rules to be apart of your family or be strangers to your family ,their choice.
Been there, done that, and never again. If you keep allowing it, it’ll never stop. Trust me. Get hubby to talk with them, if that doesn’t work, you stop holding your tongue to make them comfortable because your peace is at stake now!
Change the locks & post that you’re closed for business.
- You are not alone.
- It’s his family not yours. He needs to set things straight.
- If he can’t, you know what you need. You either shut up and put up or man up for yourself.
- How can you even think about having a kid with someone who has no back bone?
You need to talk to your bf. Tell him exactly how you feel & that he needs to out his foot down with his family. If he won’t you need to leave. He can visit with his child & handle the contact baby has with his family. You cut them off completely. They don’t get called when baby is born, not allowed at the hospital (tell your nurse you want to be listed as no information & don’t want them if they do find out.) Your bf does the introduction & maintaining the relationship.
To get the peace you need, tell them outright to leave. No one has the right to be in your home abs act like this, not to mention invite someone into your home for a visit. Set boundaries now.
Go away fir Christmas and let them find somewhere else to go that’s not normal they don’t play nice
Cut them off… life will become more peaceful. Tell your husband if he doesn’t like your opinion on it he can leave too. Too many times men expect us women to put up with this bullshit from their families. I wouldn’t be having it. Cut all ties now
Stop being a push over. It’s as simple as that.
I would absolutely lose my mind on my inlaws if they even tried too do this too me. you gotta set some boundaries and put your foot down. Also your husband needs too put them in their place.
Switch the plans. Tell them xmas is at their place and that someone who was supposed to stay with you is staying with them. Invite more people with you like your mom and dad and siblings. Enjoy!
Set your boundaries and put them inlaws in their place. You shouldn’t have to feel the way you do because of them, especially in your own home. The only reason they keep doing their own thing is because your allowing them too. This is something I’m working on at the moment (not with my in-laws tho) and trust me when I say “set boundaries” it’s definitely something they hate but will have to obey otherwise you have the right to kick them out. Their invading your space and making you feel like crap, no your not being dramatic because everyone deserves to be happy in their own home.
Stop letting them be so pushy
Put your foot down
Show them the door n tell them to leave. If fiancé doesn’t back you up then he can go too. Shouldn’t be living in dread in own homes