Giving him an allowance may help motivate him. I would make a schedule with what you want him to do everyday & put it somewhere where it can be seen… like the kitchen. I would think about allowance, I’ve read stories about parents calling it “rent” to help them get used to bills… but in the end when the kid moves out they give the money back to help them. Or maybe reward him with something he likes. Being able to hangout with friends, or something like that. I think it’s also just the age, my oldest stepson is 14 and he’s the same way.
Help a mama out and respond anonymously on our forum. How do I deal with my lazy teenager? - Mamas Uncut
Maybe cut back on his sports until he helps.
Hopefully it’s just a phase
It’s a teenager thing mine does it and I know a few other parents say it too, he/she either showers and cleans up or no screen time and no sports
Welcome to parent hood lol take some privileges away until he does
Take things away phones games sports etc
Time to put your foot down. Lay it out for him let him know he doesn’t get phone or Internet or any extracurricular activities until all his chores are done. Teenage boys don’t like to shower. Just explain to him it’s important to have good hygiene and remind him how cruel the world is. I’m sure he won’t want the kids in school teasing him about being the smelly kid and he especially won’t want the girl he’s crushing on to label him the smelly kid either. Idk if you get him his own soap but maybe take him to the store let him pick out his own manly soap and deodorant.
But he’s a good kid!!
Where do i start lol
He’s 13 years old
Give him a break, he will grow up and understand.
As a mom I think you should do the dishes and keep his room clean so he can concentrate on school
He will soon start taking showers nonstop when he likes a girl
Buy a packet of dark brown rice and scatter it around his room, he won’t be long in keeping it clean 
No jobs done…no sports.
Have a genuine heart to heart with him. He sounds like a pretty good kid, that’s also a young teenager. Let him know how proud you are of him for the things he accomplishes, and also talk to him about how he can also feel proud of helping out around the house and taking good care of his body. Things which will carry on into adulthood. Remember we were all teenagers once. Show kindness and appreciation for him as a person. We all get there eventually.
I have a 38 year old partner like this 
Plays multiple sports and excels in school?
He’s not lazy he’s TIRED
This is why you have to start them young. Set up a chore list, give an allowance if he does them , if he still doesn’t then ground him or take stuff away. Tell him he needs to shower every couple days as well, tell him the importance of taking care of himself. You need to raise your sons to be independent otherwise they’ll be dependent on their future gf’s and wives. Start now though.
What I do with my teenagers is simple and pretty effective. Make a weekly or daily hygiene/chore sheet. Also insted of free reign over the wifi. Make the wifi have a password. When child b wants wifi tell him he has to earn his time on the wifi. Wifi is a gift/luxury but not a requirement. The first 24hrs are the roughest he will rebel probably kick cry and scream. But be resiliant mama its worth it.
Once hes calm explain that in order to earn his “wifi pass” for. The day. He must complete all the tasks on his list. And that you will go thru and “check them off” to make sure he does the tasks properly. Have him understand until “chore/sheet is checked off, there is no internet access.” Once you’re sure he did his sheet correctly reward his hard work with the wifi. These also teaches good work ethic. However don’t be afraid to take away “electronics/devices or power chords” should he have bad behaviors coming out from having too much “access to the internet.”
Why would you take away/cut back sports? Most teenagers are to lazy to engage in sports. Keeping active and getting out the house to play sports is great. Do not take that kind of thing away like people are suggesting. I don’t see that a good punishment.
He will grow out of the not showering thing, my son’s 13 he was abit like that last year now he showers often without me telling him to. Like you say its just lazy. Just keep encouraging it.
Shouldn’t he be on a schedule already. He is 13, if he is not a special needs child then you dropped the ball. Consistency is key
Dont get mad…get even.
If its not in the wash basket…dont wash it
Give him his meals on paper plates.
Dont clean his room or change his bed…thats his job
Change the WiFi password
Be realistic in what he’s expected to do…hes active and tired but should still be helping
Not showering …kind of a teenage thing he’ll grow out of when he discovers romance lol
But id be surprised if he doesn’t already shower after sports practice
My kids are in multiple sports. They don’t have chores, but they do pick up after themselves. Their room is completely their responsibility. I do remind them over and over to get it cleaned. An sometimes because they are so active i do clean their rooms to be nice. However, if you teach them young to clean up after themselves it’s a lot less work for you. He’s definitely not lazy, he is tired. Every kid goes through the not showering stage I’m sure. Check into depression. Just because he is active doesn’t mean he is a “happy kid”.
You have described my husband Sorry I found humour in this but I think your son is just tired and wants to chill when his home.
He’s tired not lazy … if you want him to do laundry and dishes you need to restrict him to use only a couple of things when he runs out he will do it as for the shower thing ,he just doesn’t think he stinks, no doubt he likes food so tell him he needs to shower befor dinner to be able to eat
Sounds like a normal teenager to me lol. He will mature and learn more, including responsibility, as He gets older.
Define multiple? Even if it’s only 2 if they are active sports no wonder he doesn’t help.
Chores for $$, eventually he will be working for $ and needs to build a work ethic. Plus he will get a reward and the stuff will get done
No compliance at home, tell him less sports so he has time for home stuff.
He plays multiple sports and has good grades. There is absolutely no way he is lazy. I’d try giving him realistic timelines for it. Hygiene is just a teenage boy thing. When girls start noticing he stinks he will shower more.
Ma’am, with all due respect, your son sounds exhausted, not lazy
Sports is a privilege. Be a parent, no sports until chores are done.
Um, what he is doing would be like you pulling 2 full time jobs. He is exhausted, not lazy. 8 hours at school, plus homework and more than likely a couple hours a day on sports. Plus they need about 10 hours of sleep. You do that and then reevaluate how you feel.
He is a teenager, maybe go with him and help him clean the room ,this will be your opportunity to talk with him find out what’s going on in his life , listen to his music 
have fun . He is tired he is growing into a man , hormones make them tired also , give him a break , this will continue till his 15 /16 unfortunately and then all of a sudden he will want to shower . Teenage years are not easy for him or you. But your son seem like a good boy , count yourself lucky .
Maybe even back to basics could help, if he wants money for the weekend then he has to have done all the jobs on the page, bedroom bin emptied, clothes off the floor and in the washing basket, any dishes brought down , just simple things x
My 9 yr old has sports 6 days a week an I struggle her only chore is to clean. Her own room and shower. An I struggle w that. She loves to draw. So usually its clothes paper pencils an crayons everywhere. So when I get fed up I jus go in an throw stuff away. She was trying to take her sisters art stuff. An I made her buy her own to replace wat I threw away. She will learn.
We struggled with the same thing with my 16 year old when he was between the ages of 10-14. And we are going through it again now with our almost 11 year old. With the oldest all it took was some simple reminders as far as showering went but getting him to pick up behind himself as far as his food and room had to be enforced with consequences of lost internet and communication devices and video games until the tasks were complete. I would like to say it helped, and it made some difference in that at least it was getting done. But honestly, what made him do it himself without having to be reminded or told was when he started dating. As soon as girls became a factor all of a sudden he showers at least once a day, twice if he has gotten really gross at practice, and he keeps his space clean. He even helps clean up the rest of the house on days his girlfriend is coming over. It will probably be the same with my 11 year old… Hopefully. It may just be something that time is all that is really needed to see the change.
Why is he playing sports if he isn’t helping contribute by doing chores? It is mandatory in my house that grades stay up and you do chores or no extra curricular activities. If he is too tired to help he is too tired to play. Period. Responsibilities come before leisure.
Start training him at 5…
Just like in real life a sport or a job does not exempt you from cleaning up after yourself and doing basic hygiene!
If he can’t keep up with his basic self care then maybe he doesn’t need to be in so many sports.
I would personally tell him just like that, If he’s not doing his chores then he’s not getting phone time, TV time or game time. I’ d also tell him the sports he plays are in jeperody if he can’t handel basic life skills.
Multiple sports? That’s like us working multiple jobs… he’s tired… 
So I got my first job at 12, played about 4 sports a year and still had to pull my own weight at home and I survived. If I was lacking in any area I usually had to miss out on sports. Work and family comes first, play comes later.
I find you have to start at a young age with kids picking up after themselves , and you have to model that behavior as well . It shouldn’t start at 10 and try and grain it into them , start as a toddler by picking up their toys when they are done with them . He may be tired or he may just not want to do it . I think just a simple talk about hygiene should work and if he’s too tired maybe cut a sport out of his schedule . I’m sure it’ll all work out .
Cut back on his sporting activities. Those are privileges that you are paying for and that he has to earn.
It’s pretty typical for 13.
I’ve let mone know, if you can do what you’re supposed to do, you don’t get to do what you want.
Unless it’s done, don’t ask me to go anywhere or for screen time bc my answer is No. 
If I have to get crazy, it’s not pretty. Lol. You want me to cook and do laundry, well ~ I can’t cook with dirty dishes and I won’t no look for your clothes.
Multiple sports good grades and most likely going through puberty …he’s not lazy he’s probably freaking tired mentally physically and emotionally…keep pushing and he’ll end up mentally Ill and giving up. Most teen boys go through the gross phase then they snap out of it and are in shower 3 times a day or more.
He sounds tired can’t blame him. Offer him an allowance so he has incentive. For everyone saying you should take sports away from him, that’s just wrong. Kids especially teenagers NEED sports/extracurricular activities, especially boys! What else are they supposed to do with all that testosterone? Maybe sit down with him too and ask him if one of the sports feels like too much for him and to maybe cut one back only if he wants.
Wow that’s not lazy. My sister is 15 and skips school everyday and lays in bed 24/7 now that’s lazy
Talk to him in military speech like hit the showers
He’s exhausted and 13 not 31
Every morning before school I take my kids controllers and put them up in my kitchen cabinet and so when they come home from school they have 1 chore of their choosing, and their room to clean, bed to make, and homework to do and when they show me that it’s all done hen I give them back their controller. If it’s a pretty day that go outside for at least 30 minutes even if they say they are bored.
Try talking to your child. He doesn’t sound lazy, he sounds exhausted or depressed. He’s really busy already as it is doing school and sports. He’s a kid, school is just as exhausting like a job. Maybe have him clean and help out on weekends. Too many parents so quick to call their kids lazy and not actually figure out if something is wrong. Which is verbally abusive btw
We don’t let our kids have their phones or is the Xbox until their chores are done… I don’t know if that will help.
He’s being a typical teenager … The fact that he’s so involved with sports is a blessing in itself … Quit being so hard on him … My step dad was never happy with the things I could do and it gave me some serious mental issues that I’m still dealing with til this day and I’m 30 … If he’s active in sports and he’s doing good in school who cares if he’s doing dishes or taking a shower ? I think you should definitely talk to him about the dangers to his skin if he doesn’t shower but don’t be a hard ass on him … Teenagers today are dealing with a lot more draining crap with the new age crap … Give him a break and just love your son …
Cleanliness is a learned behavior.
Routine maybe. After sports hop in the shower as soon as you get home. Start slow with that. Sit down and talk to your kid like they’re a human and not a child. See whats up.
No electronics including the tv until chores are done . Everything in our house is earned including us paying for sports. I have an 11 year old daughter and she’s kinda the same but reminding her and being firm helps. It’s not perfect everyday but things get done. Being tired and puberty isn’t a excuse not to shower daily or clean up after yourself
Not lazy, that’s most boys (& sometimes girls).
" plays multiple sports at the same time and has good grades at school, he doesn’t talk back and is not disrespectful but my son is lazy" … What exactly are your expectations for your 13 year old? I am not sure what your household is like, but I have a pretty good inclination. I have 5 boys, from 4 to 18. I didn’t have kids to do things around the house for me. They have their chores, sure. but their sports and school come first. Is yelling at my sons to wash the dishes going to make them better people in life? Is it going to help them with their careers down the road? No, it’s not. Yelling at your kids only gets them to do the bare minimum to keep you from yelling at them. I constantly have to tell my 12 year old that he needs to bathe, but I am the parent and he is the child and it’s part of my job as a parent is to make sure he learns good hygiene. I don’t have to get mad, I just ask him why he wants stink instead of taking a ten minute shower. He goes and showers. General sleep science studies have found on more than one occasion that normal kids 13-18 need at least 8-10 hours of sleep. You stated your son plays multiple sports, therefore, he’s going to need a little more sleep have you considered he’s tired? The trash can is full, they are not wired to notice the trash can is full, but you are so you can say, “Hey, the trash is full, will you please take it out for me?” Your attitude will dictate how they respond to you. Change up how you approach him. Don’t call him lazy, find out what’s going on in his head. Maybe he’s struggling with something in school and his mind is elsewhere. Sports put a lot of pressure on kids and they may be focusing on that too. You need to be in your son’s corner, have you told him how proud of his hard work he is? How much effort he puts into sports and his grades? Or you do you just focus on the stuff he doesn’t do? I don’t know, I think your son is doing just fine and you need to calm down a little on the expectations and help him out a little more.
Sports are a privilege.
Yeah. Wait a few years. That seems to be the theme with teenage boys. Mine walks around smelling like BO and insisting that he doesn’t. He wants his allowance without doing his chores or reminding him ten million times. He’s 13 also, active in sports etc.
if you want to continue to play sports, or play video games, you do your chores. Otherwise I take everything away from you one at a time until there’s only chores left to do. Pretty much end of story.
Turn that wifi off mama watch them crumble without it they’ll need one more reminding n bam 
fixed
That sounds typical in households where mutual respect doesn’t exist.
If he’s active in sports that’s a blessing
Nobody’s perfect but he sounds pretty close. Lol
I think being a clean person is more about developing good habits.
Honestly, it’s probably something he won’t figure out until he moves out on his own.
(Like my daughter did. Lol)
Sounds like s good kid, stay blessed
You’re doing a great job noticing the positives; focus on those. He’ll start showering when he gets interested in a girl.
Sounds like hes being a kid tbh like hes ment to be, if hes busy playing all day and doing his own things maybe hes tired and just doesmt want to have to do it, just talk to him and give him one chore a night like rubbish out, not loads of chores he should stay a kid as long as he can
Change the Wi-Fi password and do not give it to him until he showers and does his chores. Make sure though that you tell him how proud you are that he gets good grades and all that stuff, just so he knows that your proud of him for it, however Mama’s gonna need you to help around the house and shower too. IDK if this helps, but good luck doll. 
He will start showering when he discovers girls
My son played sports and watched sports. Rule was no sports or extra activities with out chores done .
Oh I have these teens toooo I have no advice lol
Have a rewards system. Allowance for chores completed. I only have a 3 year old but the “clean your room and get 1 fruit snack” works for him. Lol
Tbh you sound very blessed 
it shows that your parenting is on point 
My son tried that I quit washing his clothes took his dirty dishes and left them in his room he got it real quick as far as bathing he’d take 3 showers a day
If he is doing well in school and is doing sports sounds like a lot on his plate maybe work out a schedule
He could be depressed … before we call anyone lazy , we should weight all options.
Maybe he is just tired from too many activities and just needs to chill.
Stop the nagging! Is there a dad or father figure around? Is this an only child? He is being disrespectful to you if you tell him to do something and he doesn’t do it . According to your whole story… you’ve lost control of this child. He’s doing What he wants … As he wants ….When he wants. Two things I would suggest. Stop nagging and Stop Asking . He does it or there are punishments. If you are a single parent with an only child it is a little tougher . Maybe you can talk to a guidance counselor or maybe some close friend or relative on some pointers.
Sounds like my almost 12 year old…plays sports but hates chores hahaha
Maybe multiple sports at one time is too much and he’s tired. Going to school, maintaining good grades, and going to one or more practices/games everyday doesn’t sound lazy, it sounds exhausting. Maybe he needs more time to take care of himself.
Sounds like pretty much every other kid his age.
Teenagers lol I literally put my 13 yr old son fully clothed in the tub one morning before school….I mean business….I’m a health care worker I do not have time in the morning or patience lol and if he don’t pick up after himself 
girlllll leave his cooking & laundry up to him. They learn real quick how good they have it.