I just lost my baby. How have some of you told your other children? I have two seven-year-olds and a four year old.
I didn’t have kids when I had my miscarriages but I had nieces and nephews that didn’t understand. We just told them that god needed our baby so it went to heaven to be with him.
My son passed away 20 years ago. SIDS reached out to us, there were story books that were truthful, that helped me explain or if nothing less open up difficult conversations to help me answer questions my older boys may have had. The SIDS foundation were really supportive.
I’ve never been in your situation, but I’d definitely resort to God. Baby was too precious for earth and was needed in heaven by God.
I am so sorry u had to thru this I had a very bad miscarriage 5 years ago I was 7 in half months pregnant with identical twins girls big hugs its hard I still hurt inside and out
This happend to me this summer. My daughter is 8. I just told her my body tricked me into thinking i was pregnant and there wasn’t really a baby after all. But I was also only 8 weeks when it happened. She was sad, but I think it went over better than telling her I actually miscarried.
You be 100% truthful.
Call a family meeting and explain that the baby in mommy’s tummy won’t be able to born. SIMPLE TERMS. They’ll ask why and stay simple. "Sometimes when a baby is growing in their mommy’s tummy something didn’t grow correctly and the baby stops growing. You don’t have to say it died you can stress that it just stopped growing and when that happens the baby can’t be born. If you’re religious you can obviously add those details. Be 100% honest and don’t over complicate the situation.
There is a quote that helped my kiddo understand (I now have it tattooed on me)
“An angel wrote in the book of life of my child’s birth…then whispered as she closed the book, ‘Too beautiful for earth’…”
I told him the baby that was in my belly can’t come be on earth with us because the angels needed the babies help to watch over everyone… there was a few weeks after it popped up again and he asked if the baby was still in my belly and I just smiled and said “nope but they are in our hearts” and the kiddo ran off satisfied with that answer.
My son was 5 when I miscarried and we told him that the baby was sick and that it wouldn’t have been able to survive had it been born so God decided to take it with him instead of letting us have it. I was 6 weeks and he had only known for a few days so he wasn’t super attached but he was still upset. We told him that if he had any questions or wanted to talk about it we were always there for him.
These comments are great and I am so sorry for everyone’s loss.
I do want to point out though, not everyone is religious and won’t use the God route.
I would just explain to them the best I could. If you are religious, you can take that route. If you are not religious be as honest as you can and say what you feel.
I am so sorry you’re going through this.
I was honest with my 7 year old.
I told her that sometimes all the chromosomes and things that have to match don’t go well together… It’s science and the truth.
We told our daughters their baby sister went heaven to keep their older sister company. When it’s time, he or she will come back to stay with us.
You could tell them that your baby grew Angel wings and flew to Heaven.
My daughter was 8 when this happened to us. We explained it to her, answered her questions and all hugged and we spent time grieving as a family, almost 7 years later we still talk about her brother we lost. Hugs to you and your family mama
I had a loss in 2018 and I have 3 kids, my older 2 were old enough to understand that the baby had gone to heaven. I said that sometimes things go wrong and nobody can stop it unfortunately. And I told them they would see the baby again one day.
Just tell them God needed another angel
My daughter was 4 years old when I miscarriaged in 2019 . I just told her the truth.
Be honest, just tell them.
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I am so sorry for your loss. I don’t know the besides honesty and letting them know that mommy is hurting. They love you!
I’ve had two stillbirths. Our only two daughters. At the time we had 2 sons, they were about 4 and 5 , then 5 and 6.
I told them that sister went to heaven and that she isn’t in mommy’s tummy anymore. They did get to meet and say goodbye to our first daughter. We had a funeral for Emily then a memorial for the both of them after we lost Charlotte. I dont know how much they understood but they did know that they weren’t going to have sisters. They were sad, we looked at pictures of them together and frequently talked about them and how they were in heaven.
They’re gonna be 10 and 8 this year and we still talk about them sometimes. They have two younger brothers now thay are gonna be 3 and 5.
Let them be sad if that’s what they feel. Talk frequently about baby. I’m.so sorry for your loss
I told my 4 year old the truth. I told her the baby unfortunately didn’t make it and went to heaven with mamas (our dog that passed away). She cried but I was able to hold her and cry with her and we comforted each other. Made her even more excited when I got pregnant the second time. I also bought a little statue of 3 baby elephants and said one of the elephants is the baby in heaven. She absolutely loves the statue and cuddled it for the longest time.
Just tell em God took the baby back to heaven because he/she wasn’t ready for the world yet!
It just happened to me last wednesday and I still dont know how to explain. They are 6 and 3 and I honestly cannot yet. If you need someone to vent with Im only a message away.
We told them that God has a plan for everything that happens in our lives. God decided He wanted to have our baby in heaven and we will get to see them when we get to heaven. We gave our baby a name and talk about them often.
The baby quit growing. I’m not pregnant anymore. Everything happens for a reason. I’m pretty direct with my kids.
I told my daughter that the baby stopped developing and passed away.
I have a four year old and just told him that the baby was now in heaven (we had talked about heaven when his grandma passed away in oct)
Be honest that the baby died. And use whatever you feel comfortable telling them in whatever faith you may have to give comfort to them… and yourself during this difficult time.
So sorry for your loss.
After a few day and I was more in control of my emotions we would call a family meeting. My son believes in heaven (my bf and I don’t but he does) so we would explain that something happened and the baby is now in heaven. We would coach him through his feelings and allow him to be sad and ask questions. I’m big on emotions and how to express them so we talked alot about how he feels. It is definitely a hard conversation to have but necessary.
I’m so sorry for your loss!