I’m a slightly new mom. My daughter will be 1 in May and I’ve been with my “husband” (not married but we might as well be since we have a daughter together, live together and I’m pregnant with our second daughter) for 5 years. We’ve been fighting lately and I won’t go too much into detail about it but I was wondering how can I balance being a mother to my daughter and a “wife” to my “husband” at the same time. That’s where most of our problems are.
The first year is HARD. You are learning so much about yourself and baby etc.
Take date nights. You need to keep that spark and that bond. That comes above all.
Kids are draining and it messed with us too until we found our groove. And that took a few years honestly. There were lots of times I was so tired and not in the “mood” but did it anyways to also consider his needs. Not that I didn’t enjoy. Just was tired af lol. Fight through the hard times and remember it’s a small paragraph in a big book. Learn to laugh over stupid stuff and make lists to help you prioritize things.
Get a job. Make yourself busy. Your kid can do free headstart program at 1. A Side gig line door dash or lyft. Your own hours. I see it as, if my 14 years old can handle highschool and college and working (owning his own e-commerce business) i can do the bare minimum. Make a warm meal that last 3 days lol, laundry, and cleaning. If I don’t want to clean, I tell my husband to do it. I too have my own company to run. I do it while my kids are at school.
Why don’t you see if a family member or close friend watches your daughter and do 1-2 times a month for date night. When your child goes to bed spend time with your husband.
Make sure he is helping with yall balancing time with your child, me time for both of yall and time for yall to be together, if it is just getting a babysitter for a date and have some alone time
Have dates. Even if it’s at home when the baby is sleeping. Ask each other if the other person needs something from you today.
Tell your boy to grow up.its not all about his needs.