Anyone going through or gone through a messy breakup with their child’s father? How do you cope? I am not doing ok
I went thru one and it was horrible. He played with my emotions on and off and I let him come back over and over. He was a narcissist and verbally, mentally, emotionally and physically abusive. I don’t have a lot of advise except try to stay away as much as possible and get a court order for him to see the child. I struggle with depression, anxiety and PTSD now from him. I wish u the best.
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Apparently being friends with his girlfriend because she will be around your kids is NOT the answer.
See what mental health counseling you can get through an EAP, telehealth, or calling 988 (hotline open 24/7/375; call as often as you need/want), if you’re not able to get a therapist appointment soon—but get on any therapist waiting lists. This abuse takes a toll on you and you need to understand and counteract the effects.
Keep meticulous records of his abusive behavior and confide in people (friend, therapist) who can testify in court for you. Make copies of the evidence and give them to trusted others for safekeeping.
Educate yourself on how to deal with gaslighters, narcissists, bullies and other people who tear you down. You’re not the first person who has had to endure the torture and their are techniques you can use to help yourself. Books, videos, podcast—wherever you can find info, and ask therapists and librarians for recommendations.
See if there are support groups for abused women—specifically those going through a messy divorce if you can.
A pit bull lawyer who will really fight for you could be worth the high price tag. I was able to get a good lawyer with the option of bringing in the big guns lawyer at the same firm if needed. Fortunately I didn’t need him so was able to use the regular good lawyer at a much more reasonable rate.
Enlist your strongest friends and allies to back you up and fight back on your behalf.
Tell everyone you know to build you up to counteract his abuse. You are an amazing person with tons of talent, heart, good morals and are a delightful woman anyone else besides the a-hole would be proud to know. Find your inner warrior woman and slay this dragon! She is in you! Roar!
Get mad. If I’m mad I’m not sad. He cheated on me while I was pregnant, so the breakup was pretty mess.