My soon to be five year old daughter is always getting into things, usually the moment my back is turned or late at night. She steals food from the kitchen, takes my phone when we are all sleeping to watch YouTube, she goes into the bathroom and plays with the soaps, I am at a loss! I am losing sleep worrying that she will get outside or hurt herself doing something she shouldn’t. She has started handing her sister ( 2) things off the counters or telling her to go do things she knows is wrong. Even if I am distracted for a second she is off doing something mischievous. We have a baby on the way so my attention is going to be Stretched enough. How can I help her? I have explained to her about the dangers of her actions. She is not lacking in attention as I give it to her alllll day long. I just don’t know what else I can do!
Put an alarm on her door… $10 Walmart
Put a lock on your phone for one…
I’d change your phone password & get one of those latch locks on the door and put it high enough that you can reach it, but she can’t & then you don’t really have to worry about the really dangerous stuff. As for her behaviour with the 2yo I’d just try having a conversation with her to figure out why she does it
There is no such thing as stealing food from your kitchen and just lock your phone
I am sort of confused about the steals food from the kitchen…but then again I grew up in a house where being old enough to help myself was considered a milestone and encouraged. Taking your phone and using it to play games/YouTube is very normal behavior for younger kids.if it bothers you lock your phone.
Have you actually disciplined her so that she learns her actions have consequences? I understand explaining why she shouldn’t do it, but she needs to learn accountability.
Your wording bothers me, a child can’t “steal” food… If it bothers you so much keep a little shelf in the fridge with snacks like fruit veg yogurt cheese & flavor water that she knows she’s allowed to eat whenever without asking.
As for the sneaking from her room, a baby gate could help or maybe a door alarm.
And definitely lock your phone or any tablets in the home
If you are losing sleep how is she doing this all?!
I wouldn’t call it “stealing food” as its suppose to be their food too. My 5 year old gets into the snack cupboard in the middle of the night. I’ve just started buying healthier options and putting the sweeter stuff where he can’t get to it. Them eating doesn’t bother me, the sugar at 2am does. Lock the tablet and phone btw
Sounds like my son. Ive always said he is so hard headed and doesnt want to listen that he is gonna have to figure out life the hard way. But as for the outside, get an alarm or something.
My daughter sneaks candy, danimals and puddings when it’s not snack time. Shower time usually is when she strikes. She sees and opportunity and goes for it and attempts to hide the wrappers sometimes. My daughter is almost 3 and she likes to feel independent I think. She does other things besides the snacks. But the sneaking is what bothers Mom not the actual snacking I’m sure.
Lock the phone, use discipline, at the age of five a naughty chair should be great for five minutes. But after the five minutes you have to explain why they are there and talk about it, also about how to avoid going back there, she needs consequences for her actions and also how to know to change the behaviour.
I keep a tall baby gate up to separate our rooms from the rest of the house so my 3 year old son cant go searching for anything. My house is set up that I can put the gate up to the living room so he has access to both our rooms and the bathroom.
Baby gates, put snacks and treats out of the way and give her something to do that will occupy her time. A messy station with glue paint glitter etc one day, then bring all her dolls down the next, then all her teddy’s for a " tea party’ it must be difficult with 2 and one on the way I really feel for you. It maybe a little jealousy if she hears you talking about new baby a lot. Maybe try and have a bit of one to one time with her, if you can get your 2 year old to nap, have a hot chocolate and cookie hour with her and let her help mix the chocolate put marshmallows on, just so she feels like it’s that special time with you and her x
I put locks on the pantry and refrigerator. Put a password on your phone and lock the deadbolt at home. I used screen time as punishment and reward. He eventually stopped
Put her behind in school she will learn then …
Lock your phone.
Put up unhealthy food. Have fruit for her if she gets hungry at night.
The food thing, she may just be hungry. Try feeding her. The rest, maybe discipline or behavioral therapy?
Should could be going through a growth spurt as to why shes getting into the groceries.
If shes getting into the refrigerator put a child lock on it…would hate for her to climb in and shut the door (yes ladies they will do this…just like they do with dryers.
Get a small box or clear a shelf and put things like raisins…dried fruit…etc let her know its hers and its ok to get that.
Ladies phone locks dont work. Most phones these days have an emergency 911 button on it and when they try to gwt into the phone for videos…they will push that…3x cops showed up at my house…put it out of reach or hide it at night…
Sounds like my 8 year old grandson
She isnt sneaky she is learning about the world around her, boundries, safety, how things feel, what they do. How to entertain herself . She is 5 for goodness sake. Help her explore safely
I would have her evaluated for ADHD. When my son was doing this it was due to ADHD…he couldn’t control his impulses.
I get the stealing food thing. I doubt grey the judgment. We were well fed as kids but my single mom had a limited income for food. She actually threatened ti have the police arrest us. Lol I just had my 5 nieces and nephews ABC’s thre 4 and 7 year old were like this the 2 year old quickly learning. They quickly emptied my treat bin behind my back and ate everyone’s stocking candy. Kids are sneaky. I’m hoping with bored and disciplined. It’s not to early for timeouts and consequences. Find activities to entertain and hide the items you know they are likely ti sneak.
My daughter wemt through a stage of sneaking snacks and things she knew she wasn’t meant to have. Yes children can steal food lol there was food available she knew she coukd have whwnever and she knew the chocolates and what not needed to be asked for. So we ended up putting all the snack food.up where she couldn’t get it herself. Took a bit of tough love and stuff but after about six months and having conversations about why she shouldnt do the things she was doing she became better. Just gotta stick it out and keep at it. She will learn eventually rhat she needs to show respect and not do the thimhs she knows she shouldnt be doing
Love her and give her responsibilities that will keep her busy make it things that will make her feel important and necessary. Practice things with her that she can do for you and the new youngin.
Possibly some ADHD and impulse control issues.
It’s her age but definitely set boundaries & make sure you are doing what you can to prevent things from happening like people have said start using baby gates, put things way out of reach, don’t let your phone be accessible, make sure all doors leading outside are 100% locked & stick to punishments if you set them!
Isn’t this just a normal curious 5 year old
My older three girls did that stuff when they were toddlers! I had to put locks on everything (outside doors, windows, cupboards, even the fridge!) and put alarms on the doors and a motion sensor outside their rooms so that anytime they left their room at night, I would get woken up by the alarms/motion sensors. After awhile they just quit getting up trying to get into things and make messes or take things they shouldn’t have (like electronics) because they knew the alarms would sound and I would be up and grumpy. It is extreme, but it works amazing and saved me so many headaches and messes. It sucked at first for me because I was getting woken up constantly, but like I said, it didn’t take long before they stopped and would only get up to go potty and then straight back to their rooms. Also cameras in the house help while you’re cleaning/cooking. My kids seriously believe I have eyes in the walls because they start doing something they shouldn’t and I will holler from, across the house that they better stop before I get in there lol the only issue with cameras in the house is you need to make sure you have two factor authentication to get into the online log in on your phone to help keep your cameras from getting hacked. Otherwise these things have made my life so much easier.
Put up a few of the door alarms that scream like hell when they’re tripped.
That will stop the late night snacking. Just put one on the kitchen door or the doors to rooms she shouldn’t be in. Put all soaps up
Non violent punishment for breaking the rules. Ie timeout, lost privilege, missing out on going to the park or other fun things.
Keep your phone where she can’t reach it, or change the lock… or add a lock if it doesn’t have one. Put dangerous things up where she can’t reach them. Get a chain or something for the front door and put it up high way out of reach. Discipline means training, adapt discipline so she learns what is not acceptable behavior and what is not.
My 5 and 3 year old do the same thing! I think its a curiousity thing. And i know my 5 year old is discovering her independence so maybe try getting her things that she can experiment with. As far as the food. I just explain that certain foods are for certain times. And I put all the goodies up where I can’t even reach them with out a chair and for your phone start hiding it and putting a password on it. Shes getting older shes getting curious. And with another little one coming along she may be just pushing boundaries to see what mommy will let her get away with.
Sounds like very normal 5 year old behavior ,you are overly tired and stressed with new baby coming ,she is pushing to see what she can get away with
Get her her own tablet ( with some parental settings on it) it sounds like it’s something she would really love to have and then make sure she knows that you will take it away for a timeout when she is misbehaving?
Offer her healthy food choices that she can grab from the fridge. Like apple slices, cheese sticks, crackers (healthy options that she’s allowed to grab). As for grabbing phones change passwords and put it in a lock box if she can’t sleep offer her a book to read or maybe some TV time where she can sit. She may want time to herself or with you. If she grabs things of the counter or touches things give her 3 warnings and then follow through with a consequence like time out.
Keep thing out of her reach, locked away if you must but the most important thing is to set consequences for things she knows she is not supposed to do an STAY CONSISTENT. Yes, it will be hard for you for a while but nip it in the butt now or you will have a huge disrespect problem when she gets to about 10 that is 100x harder to fix.
It’s called BEING A KID.
Thank God none of mine or my grandchildren are like that !
Your phone should be with you all times. Stealing food something hidden there youre not telling kids should have healthy snacks three times a day . That cuts it.
Explain but also give her consequences for her actions
There are theses noise alarms at home depot for windows and doors I had them for my children invest if ur worried about her getting out. Get those zip tie locks for cabinets or anywhere u keep chemicals .
Honestly, getting hurt is sometimes the best medicine for learning the value of the word “no”. Im sure that’s probably not helpful but it is something to consider.
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Dog belt will help she’s naughty
Also put other locks on all the doors she can’t reach. Have you ever thought of having her tested to find out the problem.
Teach her that if she is untrustworthy then she cannot trust her own self. And that trusting her own self is pretty important
It may be normal behavior but this reminds me of my son when he was young. He was later diagnosed with adhd
The people saying that probably give their kids soda in a baby bottle
Lock the door from the outside lol
What are your disciplinary methods? She needs to get punished for her actions or she won’t take you seriously.
Consistency and punishment. Take away her things for more than a day. If she likes to play dress up, don’t let her for a week. Most importantly, sit her down and explain that you tell her these things for her safety and that you need to be able to trust her. Also, buy books that teach kids about things in that area
I feel sorry for you I have twins that are 13 we can’t leave them along for 5 min mine should be able to stay by there self at that age but mine has to have a baby sitter these are my grandkids maybe she will learn good luck
Had same but with the door problem put locks on inside of door couldn’t reach.also bathroom door. There are ways to lock fridge get long bike lock and lock doors together
I gave raised two kids and helped raise many many more however when my Best friend had her second child ( boy) he was a sweet teddy bear that would not listen got into every thing no shampoo , lotion, laundry soap was safe if he had to climb he would and could . We put up baby gates for all our kids I had two and she had one they never did get out or get into anything really, but he came along and climbed all gates opened all unlocked doors . He would get up at night and get cheese block and other food and take into his room , he got a large knife and put holes in my bedt friends bed while she slept.
We had to put all things up high and lock them up . He cut all electric cords from TV, lamps ect while still plugged in ( yes we had scissors put up he was sneaky) . His dad said he just needed discipline ( we gave him plenty) so he took him the kid cut all his electric cords and got into car paint and got it on the whole shop it was put up on top shelf . It was crazy and it ma,de my friend crazy . Non of the other kids ever acted this way .
I say all this to let people know sometimes a kid is just different and good ole parenting does not change things .
He is now grown ( I cant believe he made it ) and has a beautiful daughter and is a wonderful father .
Punish her!! Lock in her room if need be. At 5 she is out of hand Mom. Putting items in the fridge that she can eat isn’t going to help. Tough Love will. Put a chain lock on the door where she can’t reach or a deadbolt. So she can’t get outside. If you are a parent that doesn’t spank I am not sure what else you can do. I only spanked my son once and it was the sound that made him cry. He was so padded. But spanking seems to be frowned on now.
Put a lock on your phone so she can’t do anything with it. Don’t leave things on counter where she can reach them. Our child safety locks that she cannot open on cupboards and the refrigerator. Set up a reward system, when she is good or a sticker on a chart when she is bad take a sticker away, when she gets a set number of stars let her pick or dinner or a family movie or some reward that will appeal to her.
Get a pantry that has a lock on it. It will work til she learns how to unlock it with a bobby pin that’s what mine done but they were 12 at the time.
Have your daughter evaluated by professionals. Take her to her pediatrician first. She may need some lab work to be sure their isnt anything medical going on. Then to a psychologist. Don’t put this off.
You have an unmanageable 5yr old, 1yr old, and pregnant with another but are not married to the father of any of these children. Wake his butt up.and tell him to take care of his daughter. Are you crazy?
Put a bell on doors maybe
You can use the alarm pads they use for Alzheimer’s patients or fall risk patients at night. The moment her little butt gets out of bed the alarm will go off. For the day time I would put bells on her shoes so you can hear where she is. Getting into stuff time out or losing things. If it continues a good smack on the butt works.
Have a chart hanging up and when she gets to seven or 10 or whatever you want stickers for being you she will get a special reward. if she disappears you you can take the sticker off. My grandchildren love that award system
Please put extra locks on all doors going outside , this is serious slip locks up high will work until she figures out she can use a chair to get to them. But they do make some complicated ones. If you have to deadbolt locks you use with keys .
I had a very rambunctious son that did everything climbed out his bedroom window at 4 two story home looked at dad through the foyer window. ( I had a stroke) locked me out of house no outside key , got lost for 2 hrs played in dog house is where we found him . I would get him dressed tell him to sit while I got his older sister ready for school he pours bottle of shampoo over his head in Jacuzzi , on and on . But today he turned out the best out of the two . He is a minister , and a LEO , married and takes care of his mom.
You may think this sounds stupid but go on demand watch you some episodes of Super Nanny let her watch with you my 6 yr old granddaughter does she tells me how wrong the kids are .
For gods sake do not go to s,leep at night to after your child does I don’t care how tired or pregnant you are kids love schedules .
Put alarm on the bedroom door. We did it, and my kid stopped right away after she heard the alarm go off on her door
Oh I know the feeling my soon to be five year old is like that. I have found cookies and candy under the couch. She got into my tampons…there is toilet paper everywhere except the bathroom and toys in the fridge. I would put an alarm and safety lock on the doors so she won’t open them. Keep knives in safety locked drawers and hazardous liquids in locked shelves too (my kids manage to get into everything no matter how high!)
Consistency, consequences for her actions, punishment and follow through if she keeps testing your boundaries.
Try to keep her busy with activities like Dance, gymnastics, sports, etc.
You have to discipline at a young age at one so they don’t do this they will know better and not get into things I got four Wonderful kids and my oldest done what you going throw now she will out grow it be frim and it will be okay
Pretty spot on with my kid atm too.
Stay patient and vigilant. They grow out of it.
Put some really hot chillie chocolate in the fridge just for her to steal at night she won’t steal from the fridge again
My daughter used to do the sneaking food thing bc shes used to eating on demand(yes all hours of the night, I’ve asked them to stop but they told me no we won’t) at her father’s family’s house…my self and my bf(not her bio dad) have more structured day for her so at 9 the fridge is off limits bc her bed time is around that time she has a protein heavy snack and water before bed time if we are at families house visiting it’s a Lil different bc she’s burning alot more energy bc of kids… Having alot of water and a protein heavy snack before bed time helps alot…structure helped alot, we also have a eating and snack schedule for her so she and her body knows when snack and meal times are… It’s cut back on the sneaking basically all together
Sounds normal to me. My girl did the same things at that age. It gets better.
Lock the phone…extra high lock on the door and an alarm on all doors and windows (can get for cheap at walmart). Lock what ur able to lock up. If shes not allowed to eat certain things, just maybe dont have them in the house, and have stuff shes allowed to have ready for her when she feels hungry. (Veggies and fruit already washed and cut up in the fridge, little snacks in the cupboard in a box with her name on it )keep talking and talking about the rules. Get a board from the dollar store and sit down with her and make rules together…talk about them. Put it up on the wall. On another board, put up 5 punishments, 1-5 (small punishment-big punishment). Come up with them together…talk about WHY each one would be used, give examples. Ask her for examples.
If she breaks one of the rules, she gets a punishment. Stick to it. Never bend. Never stop.
Get her an iPod and have control over it. And put a lock on your phone and keep you phone in your room when you sleep.
I would never get mad at my daughter for taking food from the kitchen. Even if it’s just before a meal or didn’t finish her dinner etc. As for the soaps thing it’s normal. My daughter made “poisons”she called them, so I bought her own soap she can play with but she can only play with it when she’s in the bath.
Do some kid friendly science experiments or something that interests her. She is bored but she’s also just being a curious kid.
If you also worried about her and the new baby being to get her try and involved her as much as you can even if it’s picking out baby hats or mitts. ( my seven year old helped pick out her brothers name last year as I couldn’t figure one out ) I hope that helps.
My son does some of the same things like playing in the bathroom and always in the pantry. He is high energy and we just have to keep him busy otherwise he’s into everything. We have a lot of busy activities like playdoh and learning pads and things like that. Also we’ve gotten in to a routine of choosing a healthy snack before bed. We give him 4 or 5 options (sliced apples, pretzels, yogurt ect.) and let him choose so he feels like he is having a snack he wants but we are controlling it not having junk before bed. Once that snack is over we brush teeth and he knows that is it for the night and I’m confident he isn’t going to bed hungry.
If you are worried she will go outside maybe put a lock up high or even a door chime that you’ll hear when the door is opened
To help with the worrying she might leave the house part, we bought cheap battery operated alarms that go over the door so it would omit an alarm if the doors are open.
Reward her for right things only.Dont talk to her after bad behavior.And watch her constantly.She will get sick of you.
Uhhhh please dont follow the ignore the unwanted behaviour advice… that’s teaching the child they can do it and it wont get addressed it’s basically saying it’s ok.
Definitely do the rewards for continued right actions/behaviours. Encouragement does go a very long way with children. Give her a small snack a half hour before bed, and then maybe put some child safety locks on the cupboards and fridge to stop late night snack stealing. Put a lock on your phone for the whole youtube fiasco. Take away things of hers she likes when she misbehaves, and make sure she earns it back. 3 good deeds gives it back or something along those lines.
Lastly… talk to her. Ask her why!! It may baffle you, but they got an idea, and ask her to share it with you!
Bust that ass…a good spanking never hurts…
How does a child steal food from her own fridge??? She’s probably acting out due to not getting the attention you think she’s getting!! Pretty soon you soon you will have 3 kids under 5, no matter what you say, you can’t give each of them the attention and time they actually need!! Try sitting down and talking to her to see what is going on and don’t accuse her of stealing!!
Stealing food from your own fridge isn’t stealing!!! Its being hungry and maybe you should be offering her a snack before bedtime!
A friend of mine had a child that did this… She sowed lil bells ( like lil Christmas bells ) to her clothes so she could hear her…she also ran bells threw her shoe strings… It worked !
We used this with our children . It worked wonderfully. Definetly7 worth the extra time to do it. Special Time With Your Kids | 320 * Sycamore
Look for a child therapist in your area. Intervention now by some great suggestions and triage will save both younger ones from following her lead. Get a good Mother group as well to join, for tips and some help. All of the best:purple_heart:
Start whooping that ass.
I agree with Nikki! Bust that ass!
If you don’t want your child opening the refrigerator at night make sure that she has eaten enough before going to bed. There’s also refrigerator lock you could order at Amazon. She needed some patting on the butt and talk to her before doing so. Making her understand that what she was doing is wrong. When she did good reward and praise her I think this is the best solution to your problem. Good luck.
I hate to say it , but some children respond better to fear of punishment. She may be one of them. I have 3 and they all require a different set of them. My oldet doesn’t respond with spankings, but my middle and youngest will. The oldest will respond to severe restrictions. Like, he he can only breathe and exist lol, no life outside of that. Gotta try it all and see which one works for yours.
She’s 5 it’s perfectly normal though frustrating. She is just being a kid. Discipline and rules. Lock the fridge if you must but yes if you eat when hungry so why can’t she? Playing with everything is normal as is handing things to her sister.put the cell phone up high or lock it.
She knows what she’s doing is wrong or she wouldn’t be sneaky about it. Put your foot down now. Implement reasonable consequences and most importantly stick to them (that’s the hard part for us) and remember it will get worse before it gets better. Good luck.
Put a lock on the bedroom door that will allow the door to partially open. She should not be coming out of bed until the morning. You can talk to her through the crack and let her know that when the shenanigans stop you will take the lock off.
Whoop her ass. 🤦 It’s not that hard. She’s doing these things because you aren’t actually parenting her. Lock her in her room if you have to. Put your damn phone up where she can’t get it. Put her in time out and take her things.
Um, discipline? I know it’s a crazy notion. You know, kid does something wrong, and you punish them.? Again, crazy, I know. Especially in today’s society. A five year old understands words but doesn’t exactly grasp the meaning unless they are backed by actions of consequence.
Common sense is really lacking these days.
All kids start to act up when you are expecting I’ve noticed, she could be doing it because all the hormones she is feeling from you and to try and get attention even if its negative attention
Maybe she’s jealous of the baby on the way
She sounds very intelligent! Try Montessori with her
Everything she is doing is normal. At 5 she should be able to understand rules and consequences.
My parents would have beat my ass but in today’s world we know that isn’t always effective. Taking away privileges or certain toys or tv time. Whatever is appropriate to the action. Be stern but loving. But a password on your phone and keep it hidden. Make sure she has enough to eat of foods she enjoys through the day and don’t be afraid to make her cry. She won’t enjoy hearing the word NO but she will get it. Stay strong.
My son did this at 1/2 years old. Had to put a lock on his bedroom door when he started leaving the house
Whoop her butt. You are gonna wake up to baby chuckie with your house on .