How do you deal with toddler tantrums?

My 19 month old little girl is acting out. Shes been getting so mad about everything. Shes yelling at everyone and being so aggressive all the time. I have her all day we do fun things together but shes just acting out and kinda bratty. I feel like I’m doing something wrong. Any advice?


You have to try and teach her she can’t just lash out. That’s a hard age. They’re learning to use their words and communicate. They have big feelings they don’t understand and can’t express. Patience and alcohol will be your friend. Lol

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you aren’t doing anything wrong, continue talking to her. let her know with words what’s acceptable vs what isnt. try not to yell (were only human) but that may be a mimicked behavior . try time outs, she can understand more than she let’s on. I’m anti spanking, to me that promotes negative behavior.

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Welcome to the terrible twos


It’s completely normal! She’s at that age where they start testing boundaries, you need to find a type of discipline that works for her, whether it be a flick on the hand, a time out, or a light tap on the butt, consistency is key to curbing a toddler attitude.


Honestly ignore the behavior…the more attention you bring to it the more she will do it because then she knows she gets more attention


It’s the age! In addition to what others have said… teeth. And… i can tell mom what i want but she doesnt know my language and why not and why does she keep saying words. I dont know words. And im sad and where is my bunny.

It’s a baby thing. She is close to two years! It’s just the terrible twos beginning. My daughter is and has went through the same. Growing pains, things changes, teeth coming in, bones growing! It’s a really hard phase to get through and I find myself in the dumps everyday because I just don’t know what to do sometimes, discipline don’t work, time outs don’t work, it’s just something they have to get over

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Stop letting her do what she wants . It’s the age they test boundaries


Not doing anything wrong my daughter is the same way she is a month older than yours… Its normal… Ignore it and it will stop eventually. Time out doesn’t work for mine and if I try tap on the butt she hits back. Ignoring has helped best cuz she will get over it and go find something to do

She is two.she will drive u nuts
Hang in there and God be with you.

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Teach her sign language. My son is a little over one and he has been throwing the nastiest tantrums and he was a very very easy calm mellow baby so this is a shocker! I started teaching him sign language for certain things that he wants or needs and it has helped the frustrations a lot and also I just lay on the floor with him and allow him to express his emotions.

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You just have to be patient. A lot of toddlers get aggressive as they’re learning. They don’t understand how to comminucate or calm down on their own. So whatever the situation is or toy or peraon thats making her act out, remove her from it, take her into another room, snuggle and soothe until she calms down and then let her continue playing.

Lol too cute. My is 23 months girl is doing the same thing. Enjoy it while we still can. That’s the nicest they’ll ever be too us.


They sound pretty normal!! Wait for the teens​:flushed: YOU WILL WISH THEM BACK TO LITTLE :thinking:THEN HOPEFULLY THE GOOD TIMES :+1:

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Welcome to the terrible twos. Wait for the threenager and fiesty fours and furious fives. They will be lovable and bratty. They are testing limits right now so they are just trying to see what they can get away with. I started doing a routine. But had fun stuff this way they knew what to expect and still had fun and understood consequences. You’re doing fine mama. Make sure you explqin to her that acting out isn’t how you get your way.

Children learn what they live. What example are you and spouse setting each day? Does she hear affirming words, understanding words when she feels bad, encouragement when she is being good, does she feel loved?

19 months??? Wow, wasn’t aware they even had a temper at that age. Bring it up to her ped. Certainly don’t be harsh with her, she probably wouldn’t understand yet. Just remove her from the situation. Maybe one on one fun time? I am not used to babies being unhappy so early. Have an in depth discussion with her dr. For sure.

She’s having a hard time expressing her emotions. It will pass

Maybe make her a glitter calming bottle. It can be done with a plastic water bottle, water, glitter and super glue :slight_smile: anytime she starts…just give it to her and have her go into a chair in the corner or just on the couch. It’s kinda like giving both of you a “time out” but in a positive way that will help her with her process her feelings​:purple_heart:

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Mack Suitor read comments

It’s called terrible 2s but doing a bit of parenting helps


We had to talk with our dr at 18 months for my son. We took him to be evaluated and his tantrums were so bad (along with a few other issues) that it interfered with our day to day life. He ended up getting speech 2x a week and OT 1x a week through the state. It’s been hard but things are finally starting to change after almost a year. He still resorts to tantrums a lot but little by little hes using his words nicely.

She cant speak yet im assuming ? She cant communicate is the first real reason shes angry

Ignore her when she throws tantrums. Put her in a safe spot though.

If u give her attention when tantrums id say that could be why she’s doing it.

Also, state the obvious outloud, * you are very angry right now. I can see that.*

When shes happy state the obvious so she knows the difference


At that age, there are so many emotions and they don’t know enough words to express themselves and they don’t have the impulse control to stop the hitting/biting/etc. when she’s aggressive get down to her level and firmly tell her “we don’t (enter aggressive behavior here)” then very softly have her rub softly where she hit/bit you and tell her “we give nice touches because it hurts when we hit”. It will not change in a month. You will still be repeating it over and over in a year BUT you’ll notice that she does it less most of the time and you’ll find what exactly it is that triggers her anger and help her express the emotion she’s feeling. At this age though, they don’t understand a spanking or a pop on the hand is a consequence. To them, it translates to “I hit mommy so mommy hit me”. I’m definitely not against using spankings, I just don’t think it works at that age. I’ve gone through this 3 times and it does get better, but the attitude and emotions will get worse and harder before they get better. Just keep the goal in mind. You are teaching her how to properly express her feelings when they’re so strong they overwhelm her.

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It’s a stage and she will grow out of it.

Alice and Angel are both right. If you do not tell her certain behavior is wrong now, she will use it to her benefit later. It will get worse, not better. For the most part, however, this is the beginning of Terrible twos. Mine went through it early and was an angel by 2. By 2-1/2, she had begged to go to school so much, I enrolled her in a 3-year-old 3 morning per week (actual learning ) school . She was so happy, she went to kindergarten at age 4 and was reading 2nd grade books b6 then and doing 4th grade math. Just pay close attention to your own child’s needs. Her tantrums now may be communication without her ability or understanding of how to get her message out.

Welcome to terrible twos

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I hate to tell you this darling but it’s completely normal and natural right now she is going through it. To where she is learning emotions she doesn’t know what they are. It’s best to let her know that it’s okay to be mad it’s okay to be sad it’s okay to be hurt and feel all these emotions but what is not as okay is how she’s acting about them all these emotions are completely normal she’s a tiny human and everybody has them but how we react to them can be normal or not normal give them time and they will learn just remember positive reinforcement

Terrible 2’s struck early is all. You need to be persistent and calm in disciplining her and redirecting her misbehavior.

Along with checking with her pediatrician because it could be a speech problem I know it sounds weird I don’t know if you’re into a chiropractor but when my daughter turn 2 I was working at a daycare and one of the other mothers said that her daughter started biting really bad and when she took her to the chiropractor she basically stopped biting and her mom knew when she need to go back because she’d start the bad behavior backup at first I didn’t think anything about that but then my daughter started acting out not biting but aggressive behavior yelling throwing toys even though I discipline her and even talk to her want to go to the chiropractor things got a whole lot better just a suggestion

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If she cannot speak try teaching her basic sign language signs it might help her express her self. Other wise I’d spank that booty

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I love some of these comments if some of you only knew that at 19 months sometimes tantrums for no reason is a sign that your child might have asd aka autism spectrum disorder and I should know my twins have this and their behaviors started around 2, is she showing any other symptoms like repetitive actions, sluring of speech, not talking at all, getting upset that you don’t understand her, lining up toys, standoffish with certain textures or foods, hitting kicking or slapping for no reason, and or repetitive hand motions. all these actions are signs of this disorder and you really need to get an evaluation done with your doctor, no amount of discipline will change this. my twins started off with the meltdowns than it gradually got worse and now there in speech therapy 2x a week and occupational therapy 3x a week and have to see specialists, it gets better with management and therapy’s but you should really consider getting your child tested.

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It’s defo the start of terrible 2s good luck I had it with my little girl gladly it’s called down a bit she’s just turned 3

At this age they start finding their feet and want to let everyone know Its quiet normal

Terrible two coming at You! Good luck!

If this is sudden and unlike her, you might want to look into any big changes that might be upsetting her. Are you pregnant? A death in the family? Custody issues? Did you move? I do home child care, most of the time when a child suddenly begins having behavioral difficulties they are reacting to something. I had a girl from 9 months until age 5, at about age 4 she suddenly started biting her friend. I talked to her Mom and we realized she was acting out because her Dad moved into a new house. I still addressed the behavior here, her parents worked on transitioning her to the new house, but it helps to know what is causing it and try to address that as well.

Be consistent with reminders and redirecting her. Don’t tolerate inappropriate behavior (yelling, hitting). If it seems to be the same situation that causes the upset, maybe change some things or teach her words to use. I had a little boy who would scream when he couldn’t do something, I taught him to say “help” or whatever word was appropriate. The screaming stopped. Good luck!

My little one is around the same age and throws fits. We’ve found helping to label how she is feeling (sad, mad, frustrated, etc.) helps her to regulate herself.

As her vocabulary is expanding, it will be easier for her to express herself in a “grown up” way.

Good luck, and remember–they’re only little once. :slightly_smiling_face:

My mom spat my butt when I acted out. However; sounds like she needs to see the pediatrician. Could be a hearing or visual problem. If that’s not it… well mom it’s time to show your limits.

She needs to be seen by a councillor, has she been touched? It sounds awful I know but is worth following up on. Other than anything else, you will at least learn then if she is just being a little brat.

Well most kids go thru the terrible 2 s. It may be not that serious. but do have it checked out. Better safe than sorry.

Kate you are spot on!!!Great advise😘