I’ve been divorced for almost four years now. I’m over my ex-husband, and we co-parent well. What I need advice on is how did y’all start dating again. I’ve grown a lot personal from my divorce and love the woman I’ve become. Seem like when I try to date, I find one red flag or a reason to be single. I guess what I’m asking is this normal?? I was left for another woman. I’m very introverted and comfortable being single.
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Following…because, same 
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You don’t need a man you are fine on your own.You sound confident and happy to be single.Stop looking and mr right will come along.
Good luck
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I began dating again after 3 years. It was hard. I spent that 3 years finding myself as an individual again. Not just mom and wife. I found red flags in every person I spoke to. That told me I wasnt ready. Not everything is a red flag. I became a dating coach as well. I am now married and gained 3 kids I adopted. Take your time. Remember every8has quirks zo do you. But not everything is a red flag. Not every joke is a red flag. Some peoples humor is dry and just sucks and say and do awkward things because they are out of their element.
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My situation is very different I just want to go out to eat and just talk is there any out there just wanting that just wondering
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I started with friends. Then used face book dating. Beware alot of them use it for sex hook up. Met some awesome ppl, some better left unmet.
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Don’t rush it!! When your ready you will know because this won’t be a question!! The fact you keep finding reasons to remain single indicates that although you have gotten over your divorce, you aren’t ready to engage different people on the dating scene!! Let it come to you, and it will when you let it, when your ready!! Proud single of almost 10 years 
after two long term relationships, I’m enjoying me!! Good luck
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I dated right after my divorce, 10 yrs ago. I dated that person for 2 1/2 yrs. We wanted different things but it truly was a smart move.
I took the next 6 years to focus on my kids and to truly get to know myself better.
Several times I signed up for online dating but she a couple days is take down my profile.
In December I decided it was time… in the middle of a Pandemic! I’ve forced myself out of my comfort zone. I’m still very much a dating toddler but I’ve met some nice guys.
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Dottie Huber so you can see what other people say
Personally if I were I would stay that way. Enjoy life it is so beautiful
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Well my story is after being married for 20 plus years and dating him since age 16 , I entered the single life at 40 . I took a few years to get myself together as well . I love live music so I started going to see bands town it was great I dont drink much so I was sober and wow 9 out of ten guys had wife’s or girlfriends it was crazy , I started by asking if they were really single or could I expect a crazy jealous person jumping out of the bushes. I dont say this to discourage you but plan on asking questions abt this subject. Even tho I felt more comfortable at my place I learned to make sure to check the guys place out early on just to be sure .
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It is normal and it is also behavior that you should continue! After going through a divorce and being single for so many years, you have learned to be independent and to love yourself. Now when you meet someone, you pick them apart and find these flags because they’re not up to your standard. And there is absolutely zero wrong with that. Set your standards high and don’t ever settle for less than you deserve.
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If your comfortable being single right now then I’d stay there until you feel ready maybe. But I’m also gonna say I was in the same position. Eventually I just started talking to people and flirting on social media, just never met up with them. Then at one point I ran into someone an I just felt like wow I need to get to know them and I took it really slow and talked for a few years an then eventually we went on a date and got serious pretty quickly. Of course your gonna get hurt in relationships it just depends what kind of hurt. If they break your trust completely then it’s just hard to trust again. But you will be able to trust again with the right person who is willing to give you that time and reasure you and comply with what you need in a relationship to make you comfortable. Remember, dating should be fun. Not stressful. If it’s too stressful, ur not ready 
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Yeah and if there is red flags then go with those red flags and keep looking. Don’t settle, you just have standards. I was the same way.
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I imagine youre dealing with fear of it happening again. I say try to find a guy friend who likes the same things you do. Reading, movies, games sports and go from there.
My brother waited many years until he out if the blue began talking to a woman he knew as a kid. They hit it off and are getting married soon. Love will find you when you least expect it. Have fun and enjoy your kids. Take a class or something. Join a club. Thats a way to find like minded people.
Continue growing who you are and date for fun not for the next prospective mate.
Don’t rush into anything. The right person will come when you least expect it. Enjoy your single life and forget dating for awhile. Concentrate on your children. If a date comes along go but don’t read in to it too much. Let it flow. Good luck. I know it’s not easy I’ve been there. After 5 years I finally found him.
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Join SAR in your area. Great single unselfish men in search and rescue.
If you’re seeing red flags in everyone you go out with, you’re not ready to date. No one is perfect we all have our flaws. Being in a relationship with someone means seeing past some of those flaws and helping that person become a better version of themselves and them doing the same for you.
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Following cuz I have been single for 4 years as well. I have my routine, and not a fan of change. Maybe someone has some good idea
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With high expectations I would stay single if I was you. Men mess up as do women and looking for the negatives will only destroy your future relationships.
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Been single for 6 years now and having the time to myself is amazing sure it gets lonely but I am waiting for mine to find me now and until consistency plays some kind of part I ain’t budgeting but it is true what they say everyone has flaws just like we all do so just follow your gut not your heart 
I’m very happy that you have grown to love yourself. I too am learning to embrace who I am. Now that you’ve got that under your belt and are comfortable being alone, why jump into something? I’d keep open to the idea, but not necessarily be actively ‘looking’. If that makes any sense. From what I see, it works out better when you aren’t looking. That’s when the right one comes to you. Don’t be afraid of being too picky. A red flag is a red flag. No matter how small. Don’t overlook them. That’s how we get ourselves into trouble! (: Good luck.
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Online dating is a possibility, so is speed dating (though might be nerve-wracking for an introvert), but I would suggest something like Events and Adventures where you can go on a fun activity (hikes, wine tasting, lectures, white water rafting, concerts, picnics, etc). You get to meet people in a casual situation with no pressure where you can meet a lot of people.
You will likely have to go through a lot of dross before you find a diamond or two, and the older you get, the slimmer the pickings. Participating in something you like is also a good way to meet people: volunteering at an animal shelter, stream clean-ups, bowling league, co-ed book club, church/religious activities, working on a campaign or issue, singing group (after the vaccine).
Do not look for him when you least expect it he will appear. Your story is very similar to mine. I was single 3.5 yrs the one day this great guy appeared and loves me correctly
Stay single! If my husband and I divorce I will stay single and do me and men 
I liked being single. My mom has been for years and is totally happy. If you want to get back to it. Try a dating site (it’s a new age lol)
Take your time and do not settle! You know what you deserve and a lot of men like to play games. It’s kind of hard with covid but maybe try to get out with some friends and maybe you’ll meet someone. Let it happen naturally instead of looking for it.
If your happy to be single then be single! My mum split with my dad 23 year ago a year after I was born and she was single and on her own so so happy for 18 years until she met her ex boyfriend he messed with her head so bad and she become a total different person! She then she split with him and found someone else and he abused her and messed with her head too! Shes finally got rid of him but he still tries getting back at her after 7 month! She’s phoned the police etc and they can’t find him, he keeps sending my mum money to her bank and through the post now she’s changed her bank details:expressionless:
but she’s keeping hold of the money so she can show the police! Now she’s doing great! She’s loosing weight (even though she doesn’t need to) but after everything and her ex calling her fat all the time making her feel shit she got that in her head then so she’s doing it to feel better and she’s smashed it!! She’s lost 2 stone! She feels better now but she wants to carry on doing what she’s doing to loose a little bit more then she will be happy! Xxx
Who needs a man when you can have a dog?
Following! I have been sticking to the stay single advice. It seems like all of the people I know, not even thinking of dating yet, give out red flags. There’s no way I can see myself trusting someone again. I’ve been told there really are great, healthy relationships. I can’t find them in any aspect.
You’re going to get several red flags from several people until you find the one. Most men these days want a good time or a place to stay and not anything real. That’s why I been single 7 years. Last time I went out to “mingle” I ended up pregnant lol.