Moms, how do you get back to feeling confident in yourself? Not just physical appearances, but confident that you’re a good mom? People tell me I’m a good mom but I don’t feel like it. I feel guilty that I had my child at 19 and now at 24 I don’t “have it all together”. I try my best but when I feel really depressed sometimes I think my child deserves a different mom? How do you get over not feeling good enough? I struggle with anxiety and bi polar. Thank you.
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Talk to your doctor about depression screening and getting therapy. You may also want to explore perfectionist tendencies.
Believe me, NOBODY has it all together, despite what you may see on the outside. Relax. You’re doing fine.
Why do you feel guilty about having a child at 19? You were a consenting adult in the process, right? You’ve probably got more energy and empathy for your young charge than someone older. Being younger may designate you as “the cool mom.” If having a baby derailed your education or career goals, adjust accordingly. Timing and choices may need to be tweaked, or new paths forged entirely. Think of this time as your gap year or sabbatical.
Are you largely self-supporting? Even if you’re using welfare programs, that’s what they’re there for. I like to think things happen for a reason. Most life events, good, bad or indifferent, are designed to teach us something new.
Child is fed, clean, warm and loved? You’re all good. Don’t hold yourself to impossible standards. Enjoy your baby. They’re tiny for such a short time.
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No one ever feels confident
Girl I’m 36 and don’t have it all together. It’s ok. Kids don’t need a perfect mom they need an invested mom