Honestly the MOST important thing is to not project your experiences onto your child.
At this age of her development, if you tell her about how your were bullied, or tell her that kids can be mean, etc. she will interpret everything as a threat, even when there isn’t an issue. Speak positively about school, her teachers, the other children. Encourage her to make friends and be kind. Ask open-ended questions about her day… not just “did you have fun?” but “who did you play with today?” and “what was the nicest thing that happened in school today?”. Have open communication with her teachers. As a preschool teacher myself, I make it a point to tell the children that in our room, everyone is a friend. We include everyone; no one is left out. One of our classroom rules is to have a kind and caring heart. We encourage kindness and sharing and being a good friend. We will point out when we see that behavior (I see that X helped Y pick up the toys in the block area. I love that you worked together!) and before you know it, all the kids are helping each other. I’m sorry you were bullied as a child. Let her have some space to have her own experiences and please don’t assume that she will be bullied just because you were.
My middle child, a boy, was bullied throughout elementary and middle school. I found out when he got hurt, and the school didn’t call me because it was “just a small bruise”. I went psycho on them - I filed a police report for assault and threatened to sue the kid, his parents and the school district if it happened again. I got called in every time something happened and refused to allow them to get by with “boys will be boys”. In high school, my son got tall and strong and stood up to the bullies and they challenged him to a fight in the parking lot. He faced them (there were 5) and as they taunted him about having no friends and how they were going to beat him up, my daughter and her entire softball team showed up, balls in hand. Behind them were all the boys in FFA, taking off their shirts and getting ready to brawl. The bullies didn’t stand a chance. That visit to the office resulted in my high 5’ing my kids, telling them to take it off school grounds the next time, then taking them out for ice cream. Never had another issue. Plus all 5 of those boys were in jail within a year. Win win I’d say
I was bullied in catholic school my daughter was picked on but learned from us how to stand up for herself…if you don’t expose them and teach them how to deal with it they will never learn… my grandson goes to public school and has been thriving and if that situation arises( hopefully not) we will teach him how to deal with it…
Your fear will rub off on her. Maybe if this is still this strong of a feeling with you maybe after all this time you need to seek a therapist to talk to about this. Do not let your past experience screw up her future.
Since you feel negative toward public school maybe you should try private school or home schooling.
I was bullied in school, too. And I teach in public schools. I have zero fear of putting my children in school because I know I will make it my business to be a part of their school community. The more involved you are, the better you know the teachers and administrators in a friendly way, the more on your side they’ll be if there is ever a problem. The staff at schools don’t want bullying and will do their best to stop it if they know - and if their eyes are closer on your child because they know you, the quicker any instance will be stopped. And, honestly, the other kids recognize kids of involved parents and they tend to get left alone. It’s no fun bullying a kid that immediately gets you in trouble.
Teach your children their worth, help them learn to be kind, give them the sense of self they need to stand up for themselves and let them learn self defense to instill confidence.
Invite kids over, get to know parents. Talk to them. Keep them away from social media as much as possible. If you have older kids make sure u have password and check their phones! I found out a lot by checking !!! Kids are mean, but you can learn a lot by knowing the parents and home life. Talk to school counselor and the best person to know is the bus drivers & janitors! They are the best source and the ones the school depends on most!
Dont want to scare you but if at all possible with everything all the issues out there today I’d work opposite shifts with my spouse to homeschool my kids for their own safety and mental well being. You dont know what they’re going to teach your children today!! If not possible make sure your in an A rated school district if not MOVE!!
Have you tried home schooling her because sometimes the adults don’t do anything about it. I’m sure there were some subjects that you were good at
My husband and I are wouldn’t thinking of home schooling our son. The schools never do anything about bullying and if you say or do anything about it, you are in the wrong. I understand how bad bullying is and never want my little boy to have to experience that. School is supposed to be for academics and health not what you are wearing or how you look
This happens in every school not just public schools Teach your child how to react to bullying
To stand up got herself without violence Help her understand bullying is not about her it is the bully who has the problem I no longer have school aged children speak with other parents on how to equip your child for this possible
Attack. find out the schools policies on bullying
This is your chance to put your torment to rest by making sure that it doesn’t happen to your child. You have to be their protector that is part of your job as a parent. 1st if my child were being bullied at school especially physically I would notify the school staff and board of ed. The expectation that your child is in a supervised, safe environment when in school is is the obligation of adult school staff. Make it VERY clear that if the bullies touch your child you will file assault charges and contact an attorney to file suit for the schools inability or unwillingness to adress the issue in whatever matter is necessary to protect your child and any others being bullied
Bullies can be found at Harvard or city college of New York
They are everywhere and I know we as parents have to address this
First believe and comfort your child
take the bull by the horns and express your issues immediately with the teacher In charge
Then the principal
and finally the bully’s parents
I taught for 36 years in tough schools in New York and met every problem head on
You also have to teach your child to be able to stand up for themselves but you will always be available for them
I went to public school
My girls went to public school
My grandchildren went to public school also
We all went to college and are productive members of society and
Respect others for who they are
Bullying is an adult thing that is past down to their children. Adults sew the seed and little ears pick up on it and feel that it is OK to bully. Watch what you say as you as an adult is the root cause.
I love small schools if you have the option. They are more personable and you end up knowing everybody. Also being involved in any social media groups that they have, our school posts pictures throughout the day so you know what the kids do on a daily basis. Nothing you do can prevent other kids from bullying, however it’ll give you peace of mind, the more involved you can be.
Teach your daughter to never listen to what people say. I’ve always taught my daughters that bullys are the way they are because of home life and to be nice even when others aren’t. This is a home thing, not a school thing
The school I teach at has zero tolerance for bullying. Unlike most schools here the teachers and principal are very pro active. They stop it before it even starts. It is great to see a school that really cares about their students.
Mine is middle school and hes autistic. Elementary was easy. Middle school these kids are so disrespectful. I pulled him for cyber next year cause he just doesmt underatsnd it. Instead he just makes a behavior choice to lash out and I refuse to mess up his self esteem
Start early telling her about all the good things new friends learning new stuff and how you know she is going to love learning and she will be able to tell you everything
There are helps against bullying. First, she may be blessed to be in a classroom that has no bullies. That may not happen. When I was in kindergarten, a little girl was sent to school who wasn’t potty trained. The teacher tried everything, from not having to raise hands with 1 or 2 fingers, but “just leave when you have to–don’t wait”. But then the teacher lost patience, and sadly reverted to bullying: “Everybody who doesn’t like Linda, raise your hand”!!! I didn’t think that was fair at all, even with the puddle under her desk. So my hand stayed down. “Everybody who DOES like Linda, raise your hand” By then I REALLY thought the teacher was bad, so my hand went straight up (and I caught Linda’s unbelieving glance). Then the teacher did the same to me, but I was past caring. So help your child to watch out for bullies, and stand up. Be glad if your daughter tells you about any bullying that was tried against her. There are things that can be done–ask your daughter to talk privately to the teacher, and if that doesn’t stop things, speak yourself privately to the teacher, and if that doesn’t help, go up the line, to the principal, etc. Bullying MUST stop, or we get what we see on Facebook with adults doing lots of bullying. Bless you and your daughter–she is not old enough to be saddled with watching all the time for signs of bullying, but love her wherever she goes to school, and give thanks when she talks to you about anything at all.
Same happened to me,but my 2 son’s did way better than I. Just encourage her to be her best and prayers that she’s a outgoing and happy.
Bullying stops when you lay a beating on them. Take it from personal experience. Stand up, take your shot, but dish it back. Bullies get bored when you aren’t a victim. So get mad, and support her when she has to knock out a tooth or 6.
I have a disability as well. It doesn’t seem fair . The bully probly looks at us like . What is roung with that person who is defent then us.
Bullying doesnt have anything to do with what school they are in. It is how they are raised and what consequences they get if they are bullying someone
Do not ever ever accept bullying as well it happens. First time you know it has happened say something in writing about it ask for a face to face. Don’t stop until you know they have done something. If they haven’t go to district officials ( I’m a retired school teacher)
The problem with bullying is the parents of the bully if they would raise their children correctly this would not be such a problem Parents need to raise there children with Respect for Everyone
Homeschool. Public schools are a joke in terms of academic success and socially they can be downright dangerous or cause high anxiety/depression. That people use the “socialize” argument for public school literally baffles me. No one will ever care about your child’s academic progress or emotional and mental well being as much as you. Ever.
Tell her to stand up for herself and don’t be afraid to report it I did and bullies found it easier to bully someone else
My son is special needs and was bullied by his kindergarten teacher, an assistant is second grade and an after school teacher assaulted him to the point she hit him in the head 3 times with his baseball cap that had a metal clip on the back of it and put bruises and cuts on his head. An investigation began and the after school teacher gave three diff stories of how his head got hurt and my son storey never changed . Dcf was even involved and Noone did squat. A year later and 3 diff after school care my son was still bullied by adults. Second grade I keep him out and let him be a kid. Third grade I taught him at home. If u can home school that is my suggestion. If u must put your baby in school be very involved. Make appearances. Speak to your child regularly.
Communication is key, I transferred my oldest from his first elementary school because he had recesses with the big kids, little to no supervision and there was a 5th grader picking on the kindergarteners. I tried talking to the teacher but they did not make me feel like they cared and that bigger kid was inside the kindergarten classroom at pick up time where he further bullied kids in full view of the teachers. New school he had an incident where an older girl pushed him to the ground, he hit his head on the concrete. We contacted the school, they dealt with the child. Now I’ve got 4 kids in school, prek, first and 7th grade…we make sure they know to talk to the adults and later let us know as well, we always tell them that they need to stand up for themselves and classmates who may be bullied as well. So far no further incidents, also we now live in a different county and I believe the school system is much more proactive with kids in these situations, kids at school will always make you hesitant but we cannot be there all the time. All we can do is give them the tools and knowledge to adjust and if there is anything wrong that they would trust us enough to know we will always support them.
I would be more worried about what they are teaching in public schools
I’d be a lot more scared of public school than bullying. Brainwashing and Common Core are your main concerns.
Just do it. If you dont stop the neg you are going to have a problem child with school because she will get your attitude before she can form her own.
I would not put a child in public schools today. not with the present structure. They have become indoctrination centers for marxist ideology. I would be more concerned with that than anything. I have a daughter and a granddaughter that decided to home school. They felt entirely inadequate, but once they committed to it, the Lord led their paths and things fell into place. I don’t think their is the blessing of God on public schools since they took bibles, prayer, and even the mention of our God out of the public school.
Fear? There are bullies and characters you would not want your child around IN EVERY SCHOOL!
First and foremost stop saying you were terrorized, she has already picked up on it.
bullying is a hot n o-no right now. be a proactive parent. if your child comes home with a story of something happening, check it out with the adult who was there first. Children at that age can tell lies even if many of you don’t’ believe it. or it may have happened to another child and she is taking it on herself. or it may even have happened on a ;show that you let her watch and she is talking as if it happened at school. if it is confirmed by the nearest adult and nothing was done, then it is time to go above that adult’s head to the next in charge. Also be aware that if she is int he classroom with a child with diagnosed behavior problems and that child acts out,t he adults hands’ may be tied, by laws, as to how much reaction they can do to that other child.
The bullying these days are from the unions and federal government. Sell what you must for private school!
Fear of Public Schools is something we need more of as they push further away from education, and more towards indoctrination.
Cross that bridge when and if it happens. Don’t worry about it until it happens.
If fearful, you have other choices
Do you seriously think kids don’t get bullied in private schools?
What a ridiculous and naive idea!
Teach her self defense, to stand up for herself.
I would worry even more about what they are TEACHING her.
All the free time you’ll have with your kid at school all day.
I was bullied also. I stood up to them, problem resolved.
that can happen in any school or even work place .
Public school isn’t the problem. It’s the kids and what they are taught at home. You can put your child in the best school in your area and there are absolutely no guarantees your child won’t be bullied.
Home school if you can!!
Private schools have bullies too.
Remember, we are being bullied right now with the mandatory mask requirements, by people who violently protest and burn communities, destroy neighborhoods, by promoting fear of dying by social media if we are not in compliance. Bullying is an effective practice to intimidate and gain control of others. It’s time to stand up and strike back by not doing what they wants us to do.
I understand your worries. I have a 6 year old Son who starts kindergarten this year, and the School in his district is horrible! Its a known high crime area, and like 90 percent African American students. I put in for a preferred school request for two different schools in our area are much better, and also diverse. ( He is half Hispanic) I am losing sleep at night worrying he may not get in one of those two schools. I can’t afford private school, and am honestly afraid for my child’s safety!
My daughter went to public and Christian schools. Sadly, she experienced bullying at both. Worse, however, were the teachers who bullied her and other students. I caught one when she was a senior in HS and reported but didn’t know about the other(s) until she started sharing her experiences when sge rescued her 20’s and more as she’s been in counseling. Sheeze!!
BTW- always taught my kids to be kind abs respectful, keep hands to self, but if someone’s hits her then she has my permission to take care of it. She better not be first, but I sure as heck want her to be last one standing. Fortunately, only once with a friend on say home—-and she DID fight back. Girls are still friends but her GF now admits to being jealous and was hanging with different “friends.”
Just don’t project your fears onto your child.
Help her make friends. Join sports/activities, meet the parents, set up play dates.
Try not to put ur fears on her
Homeschool. Skip the indoctrination and just homeschool.
Put her in some type of defense class
It’s a proven fact that children are better off going into Kindergarten at age 6, especially boys. Preschool (or pre-k or whatever the hell you call it) is just day care with a fancier name. There are no real benefits to dumping toddlers into institutionalized settings where they’re not loved all day. Children need to be loved and nurtured by at least one parent – especially a mother – during the day. They turn out more well-adjusted and secure than kids who are raised by teachers, babysitters and nannies. A divorced, widowed or single parent (a knock-up situation) should at least try to have their children loved and nurtured by grandparents or a safe relative while they work.
Right now, you should either home school or private school. Public schools don’t care to actually teach anymore
There’s no fear just brainstorming our children to hate, not use their own brains, using skin colors to create a horrible environment.
Seems like you are looking for problems, if she is a well adjusted child there is no reason to look for trouble, just keep your eye’s and ears open and listen.
Try a Christian school. Children come first,
Just put them on the bus! If you act scared they will to be brave buttercup
Homeschool worked for us.
East Texas Counseling Group, LLC
I homeschool problem solved