First you make the topic of sex not be taboo. Secondly ask what he knows.
Third you tell him what you know about sex and how to have safe sex and about masturbation. That’s it! Sex is not a hard topic to talk about unless you make it.
2 Likes
Trust me…he probably already knows more than you do.
2 Likes
It’s good schools teach it. But don’t rely on the schools for something like this. Just sit him down and be straight and most important make sure he knows he can come to you with absolutely anything.
Honesty. Tell him the truth…
Get him a book and then tell him to review and ask you questions he might have.
Easy I’ve had it with my 6 year old be completley honest xxx
3 Likes
“Where did I come from” by Peter Mayle was how I was introduced to the subject at home and how I plan to discuss when my daughter’s are older. Very clear and informative book with accurate illustrations and explanations. I mean, still discuss the contents but I feel like books give you help covering all subject matter and gives them time to come up with questions you can help with. Best of luck!
Unfortunately these days by 5th grade a lot of kids know as much as an adult. Internet and liberals, talking about the bull shit they do, exposes kids to much more than we realize. Plus their friends that know way to much. Id find out what he knows through sneaky questions. Then after he realizes what your doing. Ask him what he knows about the subject. Then educate him about what a responsible adult does.
2 Likes
Personally I’ve started “talking” about it in a less graphic way to my 5 year old already. I don’t want him to feel it’s something he needs to hide from us when he is older and be comfortable coming to us for advice/condoms ect.
In saying that I don’t “sugar coat” anything, I believe in being honest but still translating in terms that a 5 year old can understand.
1 Like
It’s your sex life.com there’s another site that helps I just can’t think of right now. (I haven’t watched teen mom in awhile) 
. U dont have 2 go into details just tell him puberty is coming and changes with his body, help him understand that his female friends will be changing too. Make him understand consequences of having kids. Sounds funny but get a lifelike penis and show proper placement of a condom. a cucumber or banana never made much sense 2 me but I guess seeing u can’t use a lifelike penis in school it was the best they could do. 
it’s the way I was taught and it’s always been right. Its going 2 be uncomfortable regardless. Make sure u explain 2 him that even though it maybe uncomfortable he can always come 2 u with questions and u will try 2 answer without getting mad or shutting him down.
1 Like
Be honest. Tell him it’s cringy for you too. But you don’t want him misinformed. Tell him to come to you with any questions.
Tell them exactly what it is and what can happen. I just tell my son tell me when you’ve heard enough but I’ll tell you anything you need to hear. And I keep tabs on where he is at interaction wise with girls, talking, kiss on lips, and so on.
3 Likes
While you’re on the topic, make sure you discuss masterbation, they’re going to be curious and not understand so talking about anatomy, puberty, masturbation and sex are all good topics, there’s going to be giggles and uncomfortable moments for him and you, communicate that openly to him, that you understand and it’s human nature, it’s natural and encourage him to ask questions. You don’t have to dump everything on him in one session either, just open the lines of communication and reassure him there’s zero judgement and answer his questions without over elaborating, keep asking if he has any more questions until he says no and reiterate he can come to you any time he does, if you keep it calm and just talk it won’t be weird, he’s your baby, you got this mama! And just to add, I started the conversations with my son by asking him what he knew about things, letting him know I know his friends talk about things and he sees things on TV so I want him to have the correct information and he can stop me to ask questions at any time. I have a wonderful line of communication with my son about all topics, I’m very honest with him about my feelings and let him know what my life experiences were(without specific details but emotions and what I was “taught”) if he’s asking a question and you are uncomfortable answering let him know you need time to think about it and you’ll get back to him, just make sure you do, and remember, if you’re uncomfortable answering a question, he’s just going to ask someone else, I personally would rather be the one giving the answers.
1 Like
Tell him before his friends do as the kid across the road told my son what certain sex was that he had heard at school which was completely wrong. So it’s better to be straight forward about it with him and all the consequences that can result from un safe sex like STDs I showed my boys photos plus pregnancy and asked them are they ready to be a dad because all that can happen if they don’t have safe sex. I also said never really on a girl saying she was on the pill as that can also fail.
2 Likes
I have never sugar coated anything to my son I straight forward with him and open it made him comfortable so much that he comes and asking questions without hesitation
4 Likes
Just pick a time when it is you and your son. Not the family. Do not be embarrassed or your son will be too. Start maybe with Son you are 11 going on 12 and did not have your usual health class. I am expecting things to start changing for you. Have you noticed any hair under your arms, in the public area, face? Are you noticing an odor in the armpit that we need to get deodorant for?
Your other option is to enlist your doctor. There might be books for boys like there are for girls.
Well if you don’t do it his peers will where do u want him finding out about. It. You could start by making a special date. Have your son get dressed up you get dressed up perhaps teach him how to take a lady on a date use your kitchen teach him how to pull the chair out 4 her start small if he ask mom why are we doing this tell him we are practicing 4 when your older teach him good table manners for a restaurant. When dinners over go to the living room sit down on the couch say now we need to have a little chat about what may come up after you and your date have dinner go slow remember he is 11 gl and all the best
3 Likes
Use the correct terms of the body. Explain to him what sex actually is. Then explain to him what the consequences can be from it pregnancy, STDs and you need to explain several of the STDs to him what they can cause if he got them. I was very truthful and tragic with my sons and daughter I showed pictures especially of the STDs and what they do to a person
2 Likes
My son and i first talked about puberty in both boys and girls…then use the correct terms and such about how it happens
1 Like
All 3 of my boys I gave them “the talk” while driving I found they appreciated not having to look directly at mom
13 Likes
He knows already just make sure he is safe and respectful with his decisions.
My son is 10 and I had to have the talk with him I just set him down oddly bought a box of condoms and explain to him. This is how children are made this is what sex is this is what safe sex is this is what an STD is this is what it does to your body this is why it can cause before you have sex with anybody ask yourself if that somebody you want to raise a child with condoms or not always 100% preventive and I asked him to talk to me before he decided to have sex with anybody it was not as awkward for me as it was for him poor guy because I just lay it out there like it is
1 Like
I had the talk with my son at age 6. I didn’t want to but a gay man moved across the street and was always calling him over to talk.
Tell him the straight up truth
Simple you tell him what sex is how it happens & what can happen if you Have sex
Public schools teach abstinence. I don’t know about you but I think the truth is the best way to go. Tell your kid the truth about sex. It’s something done between two people that could possibly result in pregnancy, infection or disease if not done safely. Sex should be something intimate, private, and consensual on both sides. Explain how to properly put on a condom. Explain the different types of infections along with treatments. Explain the different types of birth control options. Be open. You being awkward is only going to make the talk more awkward. By you being calm and honest, you have a way better chance at your kid coming to you in the future if they happen to have an issue. Good luck!!!
8 Likes
Just go in and talk, explain it and don’t make it awkward
I had the talk with mine starting at 4 with the basic of body parts and sex was never a taboo so we always had open lines of communication
3 Likes
Talk about uncomfortable subjects while riding in the car! You don’t need to make eye contact and it makes it easier on the kid.
He probably already knows.
1 Like
Ask him what he knows about it first. And take it from there.
I used this book to help me get through tough & uncomfortable talks. Just tell him age appropriate stuff & talk about safety.
Parent Hack:
My son brought the conversations up in the strangest places so I was regularly embarrassed so suggest telling him in advance “this is a conversation we have at home”
I would start it by asking him what he already knows or what he thinks he knows. And go from there.
1 Like
You need to ASAP. Kids are having sex at 10. Don’t sugar coat anything. Go into as much detail as possible. Don’t forget about HIV/AIDS, STD’s. Most importantly don’t forget to discuss condoms
When my son started asking questions I answered honestly and simply. He’s nine and we’ve already talked about puberty which kind of leads to talking about sex whether you mean it to or not. Keep it simple. Don’t make it weird and when he has questions he’ll feel comfortable coming to you.
9 Likes
Start with a book. I had one for my daughter called the care and keeping of you. I’m sure they make one similar for boys. Give him time to absorb the information and then tell him he can ask you anything he wants in any level of communication he feels comfortable. After he has some time, tell him that you have some things you want him to know that no book could provide. And then tell him there is no wrong or bad question. And there is no time limit on those questions. And most of all, give him a safe place to ask or discuss. No judgment. This is the subject that no matter how hard or funny a question or discussion is, you are the source you want him to come to. And if you don’t know, be honest and tell him you will help him find out.
I’m at the same point with my son but he’s 8. He has a 9 year old sister we’ve already had the talk with. It was kind of easy with her. I made my husband do it lol I’m not good at sugar coating or filtering my words. I’ll probably make him have the talk with our son too.
Stop thinking about it as The Talk. It’s a conversation that lasts for years. If you put too much pressure on yourself, he will sense it. Don’t make it a big deal. Break it into chunks. While you’re driving us a good time - he’s a caprice audience and he doesn’t have to look at you when he gets uncomfortable.
4 Likes
We started early. My boys know the correct names at 3. And he know that he came from my privates. I don’t wanna go into Facebook jail. I think its not just one talk. I want my boys to be able to talk about their body’s or sex when the time comes.
Maybe just tell him if he has questions about anything you will not judge and will answer openingly. Maybe first will be about how his body will start changing soon
4 Likes
My son is 11. I know he hears a lot, sees billboards, commercials etc. He is starting to ask questions and I just answer them honestly and let the conversation go where it goes. Some are longer than others. I think at this age there’s curiosity, and that’s good. As long as my son is asking me, I know he’s comfortable. The last thing I want to do is deter him from wanting to talk to me. I don’t feel it necessary to sit down and have “the talk”, as of yet. I’d let your son start or the situation appear authentically. Otherwise it’s not going to be very comfortable for him, and feel forced.
1 Like
Jesus let him be a child , you don’t HAVE to do anything , stop putting pressure on a situation that doesn’t need to be addressed as of yet
Try asking him what he knows about sex first, then go from there❤ You definitely want him to get his information from YOU and not other 11 year olds!!
7 Likes
It was an ongoing conversation in our house. The kids knew proper names for body parts from the time they could talk, “nose, knee, p***s, (trying to avoid FB jail!) toes” etc. When they started asking questions, I made sure I knew exactly what they were asking, and why, (so there was no confusion on either side) their questions got answered immediately and clearly, using vocabulary that they understood. Never any judgment or evasion. If they’re old enough to ask, they’re old enough to get an answer.
My son counselor reffered me to sex rescue its videos on you tube. Very age appropriate. My son was 11 when I had the talk. And I had him watch the videos
1 Like
Start by letting him tell you what he knows or thinks he knows. Then talk about puberty. Explain that girls go through puberty too. Make sure to let him know that asking before he even hugs a girl now is a must because of this stupid “Me Too” stuff. He could be labeled as a sexual predator just for hugging a girl. Age doesn’t matter.
Start when they’re young being open and honest about the body and parts, as they get older you explain reproduction (my son was 7 when he asked) during reproduction discussion basics of sex should be explained then as they age it’s more about consent and respecting yourself and your partner and the more nuances of sex. Make sure he knows it’s NOT embarrassing to talk about and tell him you are a judgement free zone that’s here to help answer any questions he has. By 11 I’m sure he’s already been exposed to a lot through his friends tbh
All kids need is for their parents Just to be honest. Ask him what he knows about it and if he has questions.
I don’t have the answer but rarely do dad’s step up to this particular responsibility. What a lost opportunity to be an example of a real man. God Bless.
My kids were 10 and 11. My mom tried to show me via lifetime movies growing up. Didn’t work so well. So i decided to break that nerve that every parent has and just talk. I started having morning “dates” with them. To sort of feel how their minds were working and how they felt about it. Then we started the introduction. With actual words. (Not pee pee and Kitty. Penis and vagina.) Was it easy? Heck no! but it’s a necessity. They are a year older each but every few months i do a refresher sort of. I don’t want them to be nervous about talking about it. And yes I’ve had some pretty interesting questions and reveals because it was concerning to them personally.
Omg my son is 4 and I’m already trying to find the best approach to this. So far I have made sure he knows the physical differences between boys and girls because he’s capable of understanding the anatomy part of it. I’m hoping by the time he’s 10, he will already have a pretty good understanding of what happens to his body as he goes through puberty then understand everything he needs to know about girls by 11/12. I don’t really wanna make a big deal of having “THE TALK” with him, I’d rather make a point to have casual conversations about it as time goes on so it’s less intimidating in the long run. It’s natural, it’s not bad. All that good stuff
Does he have uncles or do you have a good male friend to help. If no just sit down and try not to show its an uncomfortable talk and just ask him questions to start of with and just go from there. Answer as best you can and say to him he can come and ask or talk to you about anything.
He probably knows more than you think he does already. I had this talk with my sons at 11/12 myself and I opened the conversation up with factual information about sex and reproduction. We talked about STDs and consent, too.
4 Likes
This is a conversation you should have started years ago. By now he’s probably watched porn and had other sources of “information.” I would start by asking if he has any questions and provide him with books about both puberty and the basics. You also need to be talking to him about consent, how to keep himself safe from creepers (it’s not just girls who are at risk) both online and in-person, the importance of using condoms (even if other forms of birth control are being used). “Protecting the Gift” by Gavin deBecker would be a good resource for you re: safety issues. The “It’s Not the Stork” series of books is also very good, and there is one that covers puberty. You might also consider familiarizing him with Planned Parenthood if there is one in your area. I first started educating my child about sex when she was 2 and asking questions about my period (because I was never alone in the bathroom). The conversation evolved over time as she aged. Last summer when she was 9 she was followed by her first creeper while riding her bike. Because we’d talked about it she knew what to do to keep herself safe.
1 Like
@lackofimpulsecontol on TikTok has so much helpful info on this. She might have other platforms but I’m not sure
He’s 11. By now his friends have told him a lot.
2 Likes
This is definitely the right time bc he is already hearing about it at school. I was just honest. Didn’t give graphic details but we talked at his pace. And he has asked me questions when things come up. We talked a out puberty first for boys, then he asked about girls. Then at another time we talked about sex. And most recently masturbation. Bc a kid brought it up and he didn’t know about it so he asked. Just go at his pace. If he freaks out, quit talking about it.
6 Likes
It is not one ‘talk’, it is an ongoing conversation that grows and matures as he does. You can start off now with body changes etc and keep the dialogue going 
16 Likes
Honestly YouTube some sexual education videos and get your advice from them it might be more helpful for you and him if there’s a video you can show him and you guys can have a conversation after about any questions he may have it’s very important to have the talk at an age that you feel necessary because you as a parent would like to feel that your child is in a safe place and being well-educated is safer than being under educated about any aspect in life
2 Likes
Never had the talk. Just kinda found out on my own I guess
First ask him if he wants the " talk"…he may not be ready
Wow thats kinda late,I started as a part of hygiene and where hair will grow etc etc and went from there
Answer his questions with simple truthful answers. Keep a straight face and be calm no matter how shocked you might be. Remember…short and simple answers.
I promise u he knows way more than u think he does. Just be factual. The truth straitforward is always best
1 Like
I feel like it would be easier to talk about puberty than it is talking about sex, but the way this world is and the lack of censorship it probably isn’t a bad idea to explain to him the birds and the bees. I haven’t had to do this, but I’m sure they have some educational videos on YouTube.
I started them young by 11 he can probably have the sex talk with you showem about disease and babys fill a drawer with condoms
This book helped me with 4 boys. 3 of my 4 were embarrassed or tried to avoid it so I admitted I was embarrassed too sometimes but we were doing this together as a team. I tried to be honest but used humor. It isn’t easy. So I introduced the book, we flipped thru it for discussion then I gave them the book so they could read it whenever in their room. Also, start by saying that their are personal talks and friends talk but this is personal since parents think differently from each other. Didnt get this advice until after my first son went to school and shared too much, lol.
My son is about the same age as yours, and we ordered this book for him. It was an awesome book! It covers everything that your kiddo might have questions about in an easy-to-understand way, and it even has a chapter on Cyber Safety! We just let my son read it, and come to us with any questions or observations! 
1 Like
Old enough to ask a question old enough to have it answered. Have him steer the conversation when you open that line of communication and be readily available from that point forward to answer openly, honestly and accurately. Dont know the answer? Openly say you do not know and find out together. It’s not one conversation, it should be ongoing and open ended so dont worry about covering everything.
Help a mama out and respond anonymously on our forum. How do you have the talk with your kids? - Mamas Uncut
Explain to him and make sure you touch base frim time to time
1 Like
Megan Turnbough not sure if this thread might help?
Honesty, and patience.
He’s probably already heard some things and seen things from tv, Internet, friends, etc. I would start the conversation by asking what questions he has or what has heard that doesn’t make sense. Once he’s done giggling, let him know you’re an open book and you will answer his questions as openly as you can while still being age appropriate, that’s how I did it and it worked like a charm.
Just talk to them like a human. Not sure why people have a hard time talking to their kiddos about sex. Maybe I’m just more open about it. We just talk about it here we never sat the kids down to have that talk we might be eating dinner and a question comes up or just driving down the road. We are pretty open so the kiddos are always asking questions. When our oldest got to a certain age we bought him condoms why not. They are embarrassed to do so and to make sure everyone is sort of protected I supplied them. Good luck
My husband and i sat down with our son and just told him. The truth… no sugar coating or using cute little catch phrases. We literally explained it and told him if he had any questions to come to us and we would tell him. Then my husband talked to him alone about changes to his body and what happens with boys his age. Reassured him it was normal and that was it. He was very mature about it, and if you don’t go in to it uncomfortable then it helps the kid feel more comfortable.
1 Like
I’ve been open with my child about reproduction for both genders and their genitals since she was 4. I don’t close bathroom doors and she was by my side even during period days. I expanded the info as she got older. When she was 6 we did a science experiment with pads and tampons to show how they work. Age 7 I was more accurate where the baby sits instead of saying in the tummy but still left it at “it takes a boy and girl to be in love”. 8 knew about sex and that’s how a baby is made but I didn’t tell her how sex is performed, just left it at “when 2 people are in love”. 9 more in depth about hormones and urges. She will be 10 next week, a few months ago we had a full sex talk. How it’s performed, what conception means, what consent means, stds, protection, being mentally ready, showed her medical educational pictures of a penis, etc. I did the full sex talk for a few reasons… she will be starting her period soon as she has hair down there and developing breasts, I’m pregnant and many questions were asked, sex Ed will be taught in school next yr for her, and she’s heard me a few times in the act. Each child is different, each family dynamics is different. But honestly I rather have my kid fully educated about it before she starts going thru it. I remember when I started my period. The rush of hormones, weird urge, not knowing what’s happening, making risky choices… being educated reduces risky behaviors and pregnancies, sets them up for success!
Wait till he ask a question then answer it
I never talk to my son or daughter I believe they both had the class though and I can remember no one ever had a talk with me either I guess we just figured it out on our own with the help of that class
Be honest and open. Make it clear that he can come to you about anything. Judgement free.
Use YouTube videos, and answer any questions they have. That’s what I did and they seem to have absorbed the information
Sit him down and talk to him. Get him a book about his body. Tell him he can be open and honest. Don’t treat him like a baby talk to him like a man and tell him don’t go to his dumb ass friends for advice.
I don’t have experience giving the talk, but I found out pretty early in life by reading a science book. My mom’s method was giving me paranormal romance books and telling me to skip the parts if they made me uncomfortable lol
Go get a book on puberty and read it and then give it to him to read ans then tell him after he reads through it that you will be there to talk to him.about it.
Straight up and honest with all questions answered.
Is he ready for this talk? Mentally, psychologically, emotionally? My son will be 11 in September and despite having access to some classes last year and this year, it is very clear to me that he is just not ready for this. He is still a boy. Yes some changes in his body have started to happen but it is very clear he is not ready neither in demand for this talk just yet. The sex education classes were pushed down by parents who had girls and who were ready for this subject and talk. Most of the boys not. It is about time that we become more sensitive to the needs of our children by feeling them and approach them with sensitivity when the time is right for them, not when society says it is time. To me this is just pure violence. He would always come bavk from those classes almost disgusted. He is just not ready and I wish the school system would take into account the dfifferences between boys and girls in these classes. Only my point of view but I see this happening more and more. In that case, I find the parents of girls pretty selfish.
ODS who is now 14yo has always liked having these conversations/asking questions in the car. Early and factual is the best way to go!
The amount of information that is left out of school sex Ed is disturbing and honestly the stuff the teach I feel like most kids already know about it at that point or at least have an idea. I have been the one to talk with my son about it and I am always very blunt and honest with him. But my conversations have been about porn, making sure that if he is watching porn that he’s not watching anything with underage girls. Talking to him about the difference in what he sees in the videos verses what is more likely to happen during his sexual experiences until he’s in a mature relationship to do some of the other things. We talk about having a conversation with the girl about what she wants and expects especially for their first time. We’ve talk about Plan B. Where to get it and how much it costs. I told him no questions asked, if he needs it and doesn’t have the money I will pay for it. No judgement. I’ve outright had conversations with him and his girlfriend about what they are doing, making sure she was on the pill, told her my expectations being in a relationship with my son. He doesn’t seem embarrassed by it. I don’t make a big deal about it but at the end of the day, I want him to have the information that I didn’t have growing up. Maybe he’s uncomfortable for a minute but as long as he retains the information I’ll keep doing it.
Just set him down BE HONEST and descriptive. Explain the diseases you can get as well as an unwanted pregnancy. Teach him about condoms and NEVER think my kid isn’t doing it. Keep him safe
We have been open with our kids their whole life. Just be honest an talk to them ,it would be better than them learning it down the street
Opening line, you are growing up and it’s time to talk about sex as there is a lot of misinformation in the world. Then be straightforward and honest with all the negative aspects, but also all the positive aspects. Keep a neutral tone and open the door for questions. The sooner you have the talk the better. I found out my 9 year old had already heard way to much in school about it, with most of it being false.
Make sure it is in a private place and you are both in a good mindset.
1 Like
Ok just want to say after reading some comments, yes do tell him about stds pregnancy etc etc but god damn dont petrifie the poor kid also tell him that its a normal human thing tell him once you find that person its the best feeling in the world if you teach him respect for him self and others then he will be fine 
I dont have any advice but just tell you how my talk with my 10yr old daughter went, should probably let you all know she is extremely mature for her age got her period at 9 and started getting boobs and body hair before that. Anyway she came to me with questions over the years and i always told her she would understand when she was older well a few months ago i was sitting at the kitchen table painting and she came and joined me both just sitting painting in silence and then she goes mum what is sex (safe to say i choked on my own breath at her very random question i was not prepared at all was very on the spot 
) i then told her its how babies are made she then told me i know that mum but what actually is sex so i decided to talk to her like any other person the fact she is asking these questions i feel its better to answer them truthfully then shut them down, shutting them down may stop them from coming to you in the future, so i then told her… you know girls have a vagina (and i made a circle with my fingers to show) and boys have a penis (and showed my pointing finger) shes totally following along i then tell her sex is the act if penetration so the penis penatrates the vagina (i then out my pointing finger inside the finger circle i made) her face was priceless she was pretty mortified by it all haha i then just let her lead from there so she asked me can a girl take another girls vaginity i told her that everyone has a different view on that i personally think no and explained that to me sex is penetrative and with 2 girls there is no penis i then made 2 circles and kind of banged them together and was like see no penetration and she then tells me yeah but they can do other things cant they to which i replied yes they can but that is not sex that is foreplay or oral sex is not the actual act of sex which she totally understood, i did explain to her about how all relationships are built on trust and respect for your self and for the other person i explained that every relationship even between a mother and daughter or 2 best friends or lovers etc that your foundations are always the same and that you have to have that before doing any of the above with anyone, she asked how old i was when i first had sex i lied and told her i was 18 as thats the legal age, she then asked about friends with benefits and how does that work then if your only ment to have sex with your partner (the hole gets bigger wait for it hahah) i then explained that we are human meaning we are essentially an animal we have urges for her to understand me i explained it like you know when your craving chocolate so bad it makes your mouth water and makes your belly feel funny and you cant stop thinking about it shes goes yeah i know that feeling well i then went on to explain how as a human we get a craving that is called being horny i said it basically means when you dont have a partner for what ever reason you dont want one havnt found one etc etc you still get this craving its a craving for human touch and thats where friends with benefits comes in i told her it still has to be someone you trust and respect and that will trust and respect you even someone you love but dont want to be with and you help each other with the craving i also told her that you have to be an adult for this and then we discussed what trust respect looks like etc and how some boys can spread rumors and tell people about what youve done together they can lie and this is why its so important to have trust we talked about so so so much and i was totally put on the spot but i think i did alright for no planning haha plus i let her lead the convo so i didnt tell her things she didnt know and answered all her questions and didnt lie to her (i may have dumb kt down like the hole chocolate representing horny and you know what afterwards i felt like we connected better and she knew she could ask me anything
Help a mama out and respond anonymously on our forum. How do you have the talk with your kids? - Mamas Uncut
1 Like
This is 2021. He can literally die by not wrapping up his dick, and you’re worried about being delicate??! He’s been masturbating for nearly 5 years already! Lay it out straight! SEX + FREE sperm = BABY/STDs/Drama/Financial instability AND nailing some chick DOES NOT MAKE HIM A MAN!
This hits close to home. My ex and I have been split for 7 years and have been in and out of the kids’ lives for those years. My son is now 9 and I noticed some attitude changes. He is starting to be a little stinky, needing deodorant and such. I asked my brother and some other guy friends when they started having boy issues and all said between 9-12. So, I sat my son down and asked if had any problems with his penis getting hard at times if he had thoughts. He said yes and I asked what he does. He is definitely… taking care of that. It isn’t about girls being pretty or anything, it just happens in the mornings a lot and he wants it to go away. I explained to him that it is normal but private. He needs to be sure he cleans up after himself, wash his hands (all that fun stuff). I told him that if he has any questions, to just ask me, it is okay, I will help him if I can. He then asked what happens when it pops up at places like school or when he has to get up for something in class. I asked my friends and they had me tell him that he can carry a book in front of him, wear baggier pants and a long shirt. He is only going into 4th grade and I thought I had time and I was wrong. I have parent friends who have 11 and 12-year-olds who haven’t talked with their kids yet, bc “they are too young to think about that stuff.” But, honestly, right now, for my son, it isn’t about sexual emotions, but not understanding his body yet. Do not make him feel uncomfortable and definitely be open and available to help. Do not make him feel ashamed. If your child is thinking about sexual thoughts, talks about sex are important, consent, consequences and understand protection (condoms and such). also, explain that they are too young but you want that open door so when they start thinking about sex, they can come to you and know you wont make them feel bad.