How do you manage having a newborn and a toddler?

Having a newborn and toddler is making me go crazy. I have absolutely no down time during the day…completely exhausted

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It gets easier, routine routine routine!

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I gave birth to my newborn while my husband was deployed then got dropped off home to a toddler waiting! I had a newborn and toddler alone for 7 months… but GOD!!!

Keep your toddler on a regular schedule with lunch and naps so you at least know that if need be you only have to deal with your newborn at those certain times but you’ll get a little break from your toddler.

Give the toddler things to do to help…

“Oh no I dropped this ! Can you help me ?”
All the praise of "you’re so big " all the thank yous. Make them feel like they’re part of what you’re doing for the baby or have them care for their own baby somehow. Whether it’s their favorite toy or whatever

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22 months between my eldest two. A strict routine was key to surviving

You will have some ‘down time’ when they grow up! Then you’ll probably miss them!!

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Day by day is all you can do. It goes fast you will miss the chaos.

Routine is key :old_key:… It’s not easy. Take time to give them affection, kisses and cuddles and smile at them even when you can’t stand being in the midst of it. Breathe. Just breathe. Stay calm. Remind yourself they are babies and their brains aren’t developed yet and they are figuring out the world and dealing with all new experiences. Everything is brand new to them. They’ll push you every day till you break and then some more. Try to take a deep breath when your head is foggy and you’re angry and frustrated and just ready to scream. Just let them do whatever for a minute while you pull yourself together as long as they are safe and they can’t get into anything dangerous. Distracting the toddler with stuff they can do like play with small pots and pans with those big spoons and let them sit on the floor and let them play with a bowl of water on the floor in the kitchen with some rubber duckies, try things with them that you don’t think they would enjoy because babies enjoy the weirdest stuff. Be patient with them, imagine they are you when you were little. How you’d like to be treated. The more affectionate you are when they’re little the more secure and safe they feel. Their brains develop in the best ways possible. Don’t be afraid to let them just be kids. More importantly don’t forget to take care of yourself. Take deep breaths when you’re feeling upset.

I have a soon to be 4 yr old a 13 month old and a six week old… You make it day to day and figure it out as you go. Sleep when they do, take breaks when and where you can get them, remember it’s okay to ask for help…

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Been there years ago it was hard.

U wing it my two girls are 20months apart they are 11 and 12 now and I look back and wonder how I got through it and to top it off we bought a puppy at the same time I actually don’t think I’m sane :rofl:xx

You just kind of get through it somehow I really don’t even remember much of that time in my life besides the happy parts now. The hardest part was if they were colicky during the day. Having a baby swing helps and keeping them swaddled up tight. Even if all you can do is put them in there for 5-10 minutes at a time. That gives you time to take a deep breath and set up an activity for the toddler or sit with them for a little bit. I’m pretty sure I lived the first moth or two on the couch with the babies with the tv on. Set up a station right there and just make the best of it. I know it feels overwhelming and foreign at first but you get used to it and once the baby is 3-4 months I feel like it gets a lot easier. I know that feeling of like how am I gonna get through this. And momma you just do. You do it for your babies. It’ll be okay. :heart:

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I have a 14M old and 7 day old, you just learn to adapt. It’s really hard and I never get a chance to sit down, but I engage with my toddler as much as I can and I include him in helping with the baby

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My oldest 2 were 18 months apart , it was rough but got through lol. A double stroller helped

I always kept them on a schedule with everyone napping at the same time. You could also let baby enjoy the swing etc while your toddler naps and just relax for a little while.

You just get use to it to be honest when I had my youngest I also had a 2 yr old 3 yrl old 7 yr old and 8 yr old I often wondered how I would do it but he’s 5 now and things are easier…try to rest when they nap

One moment at a time. I have a almost 6,almost 4, 2.5, and 1 year old. Very challenging to say the least don’t remember all of the past 4 years but just try to guve toddler as much attention as possible and accept help when available. Go out for walks with them as much as possible. Give yourself and the children grace throughout this time of your life.

You don’t. This is your life now. Wait until they’re both toddlers and it gets worse :rofl:

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Lots of outside time, stroller and sometimes strapping the baby on you, in a carrier. Fresh air and getting outside helped me as much as them. And it’ll get you nap time to either join them or enjoy the silence.

I have a 4 year old and 8 week old. Get your toddler involved with the baby let him/her help as much as possible. My little one won’t as she’s still getting used to having a baby around her

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I have 19month old twins and an almost 3yr old…they r exactly 1year and 1week apart and it’s crazy!!!

It wasn’t easy. But it passes & becomes an unpleasant distant memory.

Anti-depressants honestly …

Power through until the newborn is around 3 months. It didn’t get better for me until that point.

Pray for naps at the same time. Establishing a schedule helps, if you can!

I’m not sure how I survived for the first year honestly.
One day at a time.

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Get toddler to join you for easier things.
Go insane for easy the next 5 years.

Caffeine and a bunch of cuss words (under your breath so that the littles don’t hear). My 2 are 17 1/2 months apart and I honestly don’t remember how I got through that time. They’re 14 & 15 now. You just power though and deal with whatever may arise.

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I had a newborn and 2 year old also. It was rough! It gets easier. Then they become mouthy teenagers and that’s a whole new level of fun. :rofl:

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Gap your kids. Enjoy the first one before having more.

Daily Prayers & just take it minute by minute, don’t get over anxious.If I can do it( and I did) you can do it. Don’t worry about what others think.Everyone has an opinion.You will do Great!!!

Work on getting them into a scheduled routine I had 3 all 2 years apart it was my plan :joy: and I managed cause it’s what I wanted 4,2,newborn but it was mostly easy since my oldest ready had a schedule they had the same nap times and played with my oldest when she out grew them I used baby gates for my oldest to keep her in her room and occupied til she started climbing it but I had her help with bringing my things she’s loved helping with her baby too

My daughter was still year old when I had my son, as hard as it was I made sure I was up n out every day, I found lots diff toddler n baby groups on all diff days, visited people n family, double buggy round park etc, anything I could do to be out house I would, I felt when I was home I just went round in circles with things n neither slept! Ever!! Still don’t 14/13 years later x

I dunno…after twins I’m just like how do you manage at allllll??? It’s just one day atta time they saaay…no matter your circumstance,…it’s one day at a time…one kid or 6 like me…it doesn’t matter how many…its hard but hard earned and worth every moment…

My 2 youngest are a year apart.
My mom saved my life during those days lol. And also my older children. They were my angels and helped so much. Simple things like packing the diaper supply, washing the bottles, turning over laundry.
I always advise moms to try and build a village if they don’t have supportive family-find a mothers helper or a teen who loves babies and will basically be your right hand. It may take time to find the right fit. But of course you’re hiring them so you pay for their time! :100: worth the money.

Following because same … 2 year gap here, thankful my baby is pretty chill most of the time because my toddler doesn’t have a chill bone in him :woozy_face: I’m also breastfeeding and dealing with PPD so that’s been fun. Started on some medication a few weeks ago tho so hoping that helps… maybe talk to your doctor about that? I didn’t know the overwhelming feeling I was having was actually due to post partum depression until I mentioned it at my 6 week appointment and the doctor told me that’s what I was dealing with … good luck love :heart: motherhood is no joking matter, but you can’t fill up their cups if you let yours go empty :heart:

My babies were a year apart almost to the day. Lucky that my 1 yr old was such a laid back baby and so was my newborn. Having a double stroller was great. Thank goodness I was young, but I was tired and my younger sister was a great help. Get grandmas to babysit. You’ll get through this.

They won’t be so little for long. It’s hard but enjoy the time

Find a routine to fall into and stick to it. My girls are 4&5 now but at one point, they were >1&1. Parenting isnt always fun and games unfortunately. There will be rough periods.

Crying in the bathroom helps.
Honestly, don’t be too hard on yourself. If the toddler watches a bit more tv than they should or you don’t get all the housework done or you all sit on the floor playing a game for an hour. It won’t be the end of the world. Just as long as everyone survives then nothing else matters. Take care of yourself. You are important to them.

Did you think it would be easy?

Get therapy is the only thing you could possibly do. That life is stressful as hell and you need a safe outlet to vent about it.

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One day at a time. Had a toddler, plus newborn twins. Legit, one day at a time … don’t overthink beyond that. You got this momma❤️

What did you expect was going to happen

Haha!!! Been there and done that!! Soak it up and enjoy the chaos, they don’t stay young long!!!

It’s crazy believe me .my kids are going on 13 and 12 and 15 mths apart .and when they were little omg. And the almost 13 yr old never slept. Until she got in preschool and it wore her out.

Sorry that is part of being a mom
It does get better as time passes

Keep your legs crossed, simple.

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Schedule naps together and you nap too. Call on as many people as you know to help. Have toddler push the stroller on walks, go to the playground and sit with baby while toddler plays with the other kids. Put on a kid’s video/movie/show and rest. Put kids in separate playpens with toys while you tend to yourself. Pay someone else to clean the house and/or watch the kids occasionally.

Let toddler do all kinds of chores & help with baby: test the bathwater, wash baby’s arms and legs in the tub, pull clothes out of the dryer, or load the dryer as you hand them the clothes. Fold the washcloths and hand towels, help match socks, put silverware and unbreakables in the dishwasher then take out and put them away when done. Dust anything within reach, set the table with any unbreakables (napkins, silverware, plastic plates & cups), put things in the trash, bring baby supplies, hold the dustpan while you sweep. Make a chore chart & put gold stars when things are done. Give rewards for a certain number of stars.

Wear the baby in a carrier so your arms and hands are free. Give your partner—if any—30 minutes to decompress from work, then hand over the kids. Keep the toddler out of the house as much as possible so she/he messes up other places. Libraries have amazing programs. Go as often as you can and you get to sit for about an hour while toddler is entertained. Check out museum, historic sites, festivals, shopping malls etc. with toddler-friendly programs. Sometimes movie theaters have kid-friendly morning showings. Knock on the neighbor’s doors and say hi. Maybe you’ll meet someone who can help. Visit an animal shelter and play with the animals or ask an employee to talk about how to care for them. Have toddler get ingredients, pour, mix, do whatever capable when cooking. Designate a snack-eating place where it’s easy to clean up.

Take advantage of Sunday school or equivalent. Drop the kids off at the nursery & pre-school rooms & nap in your car or a quiet room at church, or enjoy the solace of a service. Often religious institutions have family activities or adult activities with childcare which can give you a break. Meet empty nesters and single people of all ages there who would love to spend time with little ones and invite them over. Meet other families with whom you could socialize and share caregiving. Go for baby and toddler swim classes at the Rec Center or Y.

See if a local retirement home would like you to visit with the littles like pets on wheels: visits with babies! Kids get lots of attention from people other than you and it brings the older folks joy.

I had my kids 16 months apart and spent 10 months pregnant during my daughters baby growth time, then had a c section and I’m telling you now, it doesn’t get easier when they’re so close in age. And to make matters worse, it’s hard to argue why one can do one thing and another can’t then the whole school thing. Ones bday puts her AFTER the start time and now she will go when her baby brother goes so they’ll be in school together in the same grade… its weird as crap.

All I can say is good luck cuz its not easier now either

All I can say is that this stage passes quicker than you know. But in the mean time, a support network can give you a little me time if you’re needing it. Or ask child’s father if they can handle a late morning for you on the weekend so you can have a little sleep in or trip to the store etc. It’s hard when theyre so young and so reliant on mama but you’ll figure it out

My mom had 5 kids in 5 years. Cloth diapers. No binkies. No 2 on bottles or in diapers at the same time. Your kids come first. Sleep when they do. Do fun activities with the toddler. Go to the park. Put them to bed early. Use that time to unwind. Get up a little earlier than them. You need a routine

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Don’t have a clue dreading lack of sleep LG who 3 isn’t always the best sleeper and a early waker and wakes during night still and due baby boy tom and if not came induce a week tom

Mine were 15 months apart - not easy but each day will get easier - love them all you can :heart::heart:

I’ve a 5 Yr old 2 Yr old 1 year old and 7 month old as well as a 12 and 16 year old . You aren’t me meant to have down time during the day .

I know it’s too late to cry over Spilled Mlk but you should have Thought about that