I use bark and family link
No data, no wifi. Buy a simple flip phone with no internet access. After all its just so he can call you right?
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Its called buying a basic flip phone. Yes kids need a phone to communicate but they don’t need bells and whistles or internet. You buy a basic flip phone trac phone and then there’s not much to monitor
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Tell him you’ve installed an app and you’ll see everything he does & if u catch him doing something wrong , you’ll get him a granny phone like the jitterbug until he is 18 lol
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I use family link for my children’s tablets
A phone with just text and calls. No smart phone.
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Mm guardian in the play store it watches everything on their phone texts calls internet YouTube social media and even some words that you have as alert words you can even limit time on it and block certain apps the internet and many other things if needed
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My I pad is signed into my daughters I cloud.
We also have family sharing.
Any new site she wants to see has to have my 4 digit pin
I also have certain apps that have a daily time limit
All my sons sign in information is the same as mine. I can check browser history, downloads even what videos he is watching in you tube when ever I want…
We use Qustodio for our kids. I can block content, see what they are looking at and turn off features on their phone from an app on mine.
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It’s literally alarming that almost no one said to talk to your child. Let me tell you something. You can sensor whatever you want but they will find another way to look at it if they want to. Educate your children, have an open discussion. You want to shelter them and then send them into a world where there is no protection from those things and think it’ll just be fine SMH at 12 years old they are old enough to understand most things. TALK TO YOUR KIDS for God’s sakes🙄
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You take his phone and look through it. Stop beating around the bush trying to be your kids friend your his mom first and if your payong for the phone tell him you’re looking through it and if theres anything on there that use are going to have to talk about it. Monitor the apps he is using who is he texting. Its not that hard.
My kids started with a flip phone and if they wanted a smart phone, they bought one when they got a job, but they were on my plan and I had full access to it. They were fully responsible for it. If they broke or lost it, they had to buy a new one or pay to fix it. Now, if something else happened (like when the cat knocked one into the dog’s water dish) we would help. If it were confiscated at school/work/etc, then it was confiscated at home. If we found anything we felt was inappropriate, we changed the wifi password at home, and the phone was confiscated. Those were the rules, and after 1 kid actually had to replace her phone, the rules were followed and we never had an issue. Being responsible with things hits them differently when they have to buy it themselves.
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So we have five kids
24 23 16 15 11.
I always knew there password to social media and there main screen. I randomly do checks. Sometimes I ask for their phone sometimes I take it while they shower. The two older ones I checked until about 16/17.
My now 16 year old I don’t remember the last time I checked and that’s because he’s very open with us (well me more then dad) he tells us if he’s having a few drinks we know he and his GF is having sex. We know he doesn’t go to parties and doesn’t sign into social media EVER.
We seemed to have done a better job with the three younger ones about lying. We have a rule tell the truth you will get into less trouble.
15 year old I check here and there because he’s my number 1 sneaker lol
11 year old doesn’t have a phone because he doesn’t need it.
I struggle more with monitoring the conversations on play station and the shit kids talk about. Communication is key. If they don’t respect they lose the phone
Do what works for your family! You got this mama
My son is 14 an leaves his phone at home everyday. It’s always sitting on my kitchen counter. My son has been watching grown up videos here recently but they are getting to that age. Id atleast have a talk with him about it.
We use Circle by Disney. I can control his online content, internet usage from an app on my phone for each device separately. I love it, he hates it….lol🤷♀️
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Get the old school flip phone for him… He can call and text but no internet
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Talk with him… would be my first thought
Yessss. I have 6 kids talking is so important. Discuss the importance of online safety. What’s appropriate and what is not. I have 2 teen boys left at home so it’s been tough. Talking is gonna get you further. They are curious . You can’t shelter them from anything
I talk to my daughter & check her phone all the time.
I didn’t have a phone when I was 12 and neither did any of my friends. We all survived! Guess what, we managed to come home on time and all parents usually knew where we were 99% of the time. And boy we better be there!! We definitely need control over what our children to doing and the control is not an electronic. The control is called parenting! Just my opinion of course…
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I find Gmail is the best, my son has his own Gmail account. I can log onto his Gmail with my phone and see what apps he’s downloaded, which websites he uses and what he watched on YouTube. There’s even location on there
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on sprint, I block adult content. Under preferences.
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Get an old flip with no internet … Let him go old school … He can still talk n txt but without all the extras
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We use the family link app. You can set it up to approve any apps they download, she can’t get in Google or you tube even unless I accept it. She has a time on her phone & I can tell what apps she’s on and for how long.
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There’s a app called bark u can see everything and also know where he is at all times
Bark
Will inform you of anything they do any all different apps.
Family link thing with Google you can monitor & remove my son is 4 we have his tablet locked like fort knox I see anything that looks bad or horror prone I can block, remove,lock
There’s a app called questio or something along those lines. You can control websites, view recent contacts set a curfew on the phone etc
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My son has iPhone i block all websites and apps that i think are inappropriate you must enter password to download anything. I can also lock him out at certain times and preselecte who he calls and texts
Get them a basic phone, no smart phone and make it to text and call ONLY. You can contact them and they contact you but zero access to apps and internet
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Yep my 14 yr does not and will not have a phone for a long time after finding things on it…we talked to him not yelled talked to him about internet safety, not talking or sending pictures to those you dont know and that from his actions hes not mature enough for a phone
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If hes doing inappropriate things based on your house rules then take it away. If its for communication with other parent then Flip or trac phone , with just calling and txt and simple data stuff no apps.
If not delete everything and put a parental acceptance for apps ( it sends you a text message to approve app) you can get a daily update of what they were on screen time wise ( facebook, browser etc) you can shut it off overnight . Check apps from your phone , know log ins and passwords. Then you can check without the phone .
There is nothing wrong with having a phone at 12… I just talk with my kids and look at the phone when they are not expecting it. If I find something then we talk about it. Otherwise they will keep things from you.
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Own their i cloud and lock their phone
I’m curious what was alarming. I don’t monitor my kids’ phones at all.
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I have an app called family link for Android
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Old school phone where he can only call.or text you. No internet picture taking just a simple old school phone
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I used MM Guardian at the suggestion of my son’s therapist after he was caught sending inappropriate pics to girls he didn’t know.
Get a repaid with no internet. For the times he can’t be responsible
Thats is a great ideal, good job mom!!!
Maybe you should monitor the phone
I use family link… You can set restrictions for time spent on the phone there’s an emergency alarm if they are ever in trouble I love this app you need to download the parent app on your phone and the child app on their phone
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Check out the Group, Parenting in a Tech World on Facebook! They’re great in there!
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Family link is a great app. Every app download has to be approved by you. You can set times for him to use his phone and times when he shouldn’t be on his phone you can lock it. Like while doing school work.
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Well at about the teenage stage. I stopped monitoring their phone for the “alarming” reason. He’s a boy. As long as he isn’t talking to people he doesn’t know personally. But they have apps you can purchase and stick on his phone. He can’t turn them off or delete them.
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Parenting in a Tech World
If I found “alarming” stuff on my 12 year olds phone…I would probably take it immediately and only let him use it when he goes out 
12 is a bit young to have constant access to a smart phone IMO
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I removed the internet and all associated apps from my sons phone. He’s 16 and still doesn’t have safari on his phone.
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I’m more of a boys will be boys kinda parent. I say let them be. And talk to them about what you do and dont want them doing, but dont be surprised when you find things you dont like. Our boys have phones they are 14 and 16 and we told them they are going to do what all boys do but we dont want there younger siblings seeing there stuff, hearing there stuff or being subjected to any of it yet. They are to use them responsibly in public and around family members. And they know we can take and look at there stuff for any reason at any time and question any thing they do. They agree and we often have adult conversations with them when we find the unwanted stuff but they do not get punished. Best of luck
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Depends on the type of phone, we have iPhones so we use screen time and can see and monitor what is done on the phone and limit the apps allowed. Which has been wayyyy more consistent then when we had to use Google family link, but if you have android family link is alright. Our oldest lives with his mom in Alabama and we pay for his phone and after set up we are able to monitor what he does. He’s about to be 13 and we have it to where we can still use the internet but adult websites are restricted and we can see what he’s been websites he’s visited. And as of now he still has to ask for apps just so we know. He is getting to the point where we have let up on some restrictions and things we allow him to do but still I think screen time has been the best parental feature. We can also limit his screen time so it locks like during school hours or when it’s bed time but can also allow him to be able to contact certain people even while it’s locked like his momma and us incase he needs anything or if there’s certain apps he uses for school we can add it to an always allowed list. I recommend this route 100% because it’s the first parental feature that works with out us needing his phone to fix something or updates with distance for us.
Family link is great i love it!!!
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The 360 app lets u see literally everything
just get phones no internet kids friendly just to make calls and texts till older thats what i would do if my kids had phones my middle child is 10 and youngest is 9 and no phones they try mess with mine and i keep saying no if keeps messing with mine and her dads never getting one because what search knowing they are not aloud to .
Family Link is the best app that I have found.
Google has an app called family link !! It’s great !
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Idk my son is 12 & I guess I’m just being over protective because I don’t plan to get him a phone until maybe high school. Maybe lol 
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I use Google Family Link for my daughter’s tablet. Granted, she is only 3 1/2, & her tablet is super locked down, so I’m not too worried about her at this time. But it’ll be great for when she is older, too. You can monitor everything & lock apps easily.
There’s an app called bark.
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Which app shows you texts and call info as well as locking down apps and the internet automatically then it alerts you?
Family link for Android. You can set it to need approval for downloads and set limits on web surfing as well as daily limits.
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Downgrade his phone to a basic prepaid call/text only model with no wifi capability.
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Let the kid watch porn, calm down Hitler.
Family link and you can see what apps his using and how long his on them can also block certain things apps through it as well my 10 year old has my old phone just for games and I use that just so he can’t use your tube etc
Sweetie you are the adult and so is his Pops- you need to make sure your child is safe. Various apps. are a “in” for so many problems. You keep close eye on everything he does on that device - it will keep him safe and give you peace in mind.
I phones can be controlled through the screen time in settings I control apps websites time spent on it and they have a downtime mode where there’s no access but to call or text mom or dad only or emergency contacts I set.
This is why kids have zero reason to have a cellphone
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Get a basic phone that had no internet access. A simple one that only does calling and texting.
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If your child has an iPhone, when you set up the phone create an Apple ID for a 12 year old. Link it to your phone and everything can be monitored and protected from your device.
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We never have never monitored Our kids phones. Now 19 and 15, we have always have an open line of communication. If they never learn a mistake, how do they learn to fix it ?
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My son is 12 and he does not have a phone. He really wants one but we’re not sure if we are ready yet. (We grew up without one) when we do decide to get him one. We have a strict rule of NO social media accounts. He doesn’t need Facebook or Snapchat or anything like that. He can text his family or call, Or use kids Messenger where I can Monitor everything that is going on. I feel like in today’s world you can’t give your child full access to the internet.
I use family link with Google for app control. Life 360 to know the location and battery life. MMGuardian for web control, contacts control and text monitoring. Cube ACR to record phone calls.
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Google family link here. My daughters 12 i cam block websites, set age restrictions for apps shows music ect, approve apps for her to download, set time limits and “bed times” so far its working really well for us
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I don’t and never have monitored my sons phone.
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I let my kids know that I monitor their phones to keep them safe. The internet is dangerous and I talk to them about the dangers. It really helps to be open and have age appropriate conversations with our kids!
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My daughter I have under my iCloud account - I set her screen time and down times (she has no access to any entertainment) from 10pm to 6am. It works for us! It allows me to see from my iPhone how much time she is spending on which apps and all. It’s great!
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I just randomly take my daughter phone and go through it. I have restrictions on what she can download and have to give permission for from my phone and I have since I work third shift after a certain time she can only use it to talk to me. I have her passwords to Instagram and Snapchat so I can go on them anytime I want.
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Family Link is what we use
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Bark. I use it and it really is great.
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MmGuardian have used it for years and will use it for all my kids!
You all are driving a wedge between yourself and your children. Privacy is a real thing, even for kids, and refusing to respect that privacy will cause them to not come to you with problems.
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Link all accounts to yours and set the parental controls on the device. Also make him give it to you periodically so you can check it.
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I use Family Link and love it. You can block/allow apps, set a usage time limit for apps, and set a time for the phone to lock/unlock (with exception of making phone calls for emergency situations). Content of text messages is not viewable.
I believe parental controls to an extent is important. With smartphones the kids have access to literally anything, and it’s our job as parents to set healthy restrictions for them.
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My son who is 14 turns his phone in every night when it’s bed time. We give him privacy but my husband does sometimes looks just to make sure nothing crazy is going on. We used to use an app to see what he was doing when he was 11, 12, 13. Now he We don’t have the app and we feel like we can trust him more. Also he knows we will turn the data off on his phone if there are any issues and we shut the wifi down for him at home.
I’ll admit it, I do not check my kids phones. We’ve talked about various things and I just have to trust them…my daughter’s have never given me reason to not trust them…
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Family link. It’s been great so far!
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If he has an iPhone you can limit what he sees through screen time.
I used Family Time… It was necessary after some very scary events. I had no idea what was going on at the time. We talked but she never gave any indication that the bullying/harassment was even happening until she ended up in the hospital. Cell phones, computers and gaming systems should be monitored until they are 18.
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I grab my kids phone to go through it. My kids mainly get on Snapchat. When i do grab there phone they yell dad mom is going through our phones. And he will tell me to stop and say our kids aren’t bad. I dont care. I need to know whats going on.
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I didn’t have a phone until I could pay for it myself. At like 14. You are the parent. I would request phones be left on the counter to charge at the end of the day to charge or something
Get him a flip phone… that’s what me and my siblings had to share when we were younger to contact our parents
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Mine gives me his phone to look at so we do checks etc.
We got my son a cell phone really early, like 10.
I told him then, and have reminded him throughout the years he’s subject to random phone checks. Could be once a day, once a week. Once a year. But once he breaks the trust from looking at inappropriate stuff, that’s when all hope is lost. He was told if he deletes the browsing history, we will know. And trust is really hard to rebuild and takes years.
He’s 16 now. I’ve never had a reason to take his phone away, and never found anything alarming. I still check at random.
One thing to remember is that it is not actually “their” phone. It’s yours. They just use it. I go through my 12 years old’s phone ever night. No Snap chat, Tik Tok, IG or FB either.
Verizon Smart Family
I don’t really check my son’s phone bc I believe children need their privacy too. He’s about to be 13. Every night at bed time I take the phone but that’s about it. We have a setting on the phone that we have to approve apps and it blocks most websites that are not appropriate.
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Well, my son is only 6 so he doesn’t have a phone but when he uses ours for games and watching stuff we have it set to where he cannot download or watch certain stuff without a password. When and if he gets a phone in a few years, I would probably check it every night just to make sure nothing is going on and have it set up the same as ours where he would need verification for downloading anything etc. Hope it all works out!
My son didn’t have a phone til he was 14/15. He had limited data, so could only play games. I explained what he was allowed to do with his phone. He is 17,almost 18 now, I never monitored his phone, I trusted that he would make good decisions