When I do go back to work, currently at home with our 6 month old, I will be PT. So to make it even and still give me my own money to spend, I get a utility plus my cell phone which is my own contract
Thatâs honestly something you need to talk to him about. But it shouldnât be your money and his money, itâs both of yours if youâre a family. My husband and I never âsplitâ bills in an exact amount. Weâve had a joint bank account since we moved in together and it was never my money his money, itâs our money.
Why is the roommate paying more for 1 person when yâall have 4 almost 5 people on your side? You and your bf should be paying the bills together, but how can you pay anything on 16 hrs a week. That would just be gas money.
I think I would have had the conversation with him before I cut my hours because technically he should be paying more because youâre his babysitter now. And like stay at home momâs youâre still working but not getting any compensation for it
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Me and my partner moved in together after knowing each other for 2 weeks we split all the bills until he lost his job due to COVID I payed everything he still had some income and while he was home he would look after my daughter 5 days a week plus do shopping and what not
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If you are a legitimate couple, and you both have a child plus you are pregnant. Then you have 3 children together and are a joint family. Its 50-50. If itâs a living arrangement of yours,mine,and ours. Then get your own place, because its truly not a good relationship.
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We work it out as a percentage ⌠So my partner earns more than me and we worked it so that we both pay say 60% of our income on bills. I pay less than him as I earn less than him (Iâm home more for the kids) but itâs still fair
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I would think if you cut your hours down you discussed it beforehand . I know in my relationship we would. And in that case Iâd imagine you worked something out on how the bills would still be paid. If not you need to communicate better.
But to answer your question we split our bills. As far as most of the rent and the bigger bills he pays bc he makes more than me. I pay my own personal bills, a portion of the rent, and some utilities.
My other half pays the rent and gets the food shopping and I pay the bills.
I over pay on all the bills so when winter comes, I know that we are ok and we are due our first child in 6 days time.
I will keep paying the bills and what is left in our accounts is for us, if I need a top up he letâs me have it.
At the end of the day we say itâs our money not his or my.
You are watching the kids that counts for something.He should take some of what you do off the rent you pay.
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Maybe Iâm crazy butâŚIâve done something similar, my husband and I let a family member move in with us they didnât have children but we didnât split anything. They paid a certain amount. If they have a bedroom to their self they should pay a set amount, depending on where you live if I were you Iâd add up all the utilities and rent and set an amountâŚ
If youâre truly in a relationship those are all yours and his kids and bills should just be paid as a family unit no matter who technically pays more. Youâre not roommates youâre a family. The roommate continues to pay a third because they are a roommate.
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Nope, especially if youâre putting in less hours because of watching his son and now his new child. A conversation needs to be had sounds like
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I would assume itâs his baby that you are growing as well. I could see him expecting you to pay something. But you are driving him to work and babysitting his child. Maybe charge him for the babysitting.
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Not if he isnât paying you how can you pay 1/3 if you work 16 hrs a week outside the home?
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Youâre a family now. So yes, you should still pay your part. You should consider his child as yours and not look at it as being a babysitter.
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If yâall together then he should be paying for the both of yâall especially since your pregnant.
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If you have had to cut your hours to stay home and watch the kids then no, you should not have to pay half. You are eliminating the cost of daycare and that alone is a form of monetary contribution.
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You cut your work hours, you give him rides to work & youâre going to be a stay at home now w 3 kids to take care of⌠I think he should take it from here financially
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are you roommates of partners?
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Girl you are getting the shitty end of this deal
What would he be paying in daycare that should go towards your part at least 
If you want to keep your income separate, thatâs your choice and you guys should do whatever works for you. I know a lot of couples who split all their bills and keep their income separate. Doing things around the house is work too and you shouldnât be expected to pay the same amount you did before as your income is reduced. The amount you pay should be reduced the same percentage as your income drop.
Thats my opinion anyways. Iâve always shared finances with my SO so i only have the experiences of others to base my advice on so im sorry if itâs not good
Just share its Christmas
U r together u should pay together put ur money together and pay what has to be paid
Why do you even have to pay anything at all? A man should take care of his woman period. Iâm sorry but your question is ridiculous. If he canât take care of you nd your kids leave him nd be on your own since he ainât doing shit for you.
Honestly, never had this conversation with my husband. Even when we were dating. We just paid stuff as we did but never had much discussion regarding âwhoâ paid. So long as the household benefited
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I never really understood that part if you got the money to pitch in then yeah I would say go ahead and pay it but youâre technically staying at home and heâs working so thatâs two incomes roommate and you guys you split it half and half or you make her pay for the room and half of the bills so itâs either a set price every month for the rent or just half of the rent or just for the room because you remember you guys are a family but she is the only one renting a room so yes sheâs still using the utilities so thatâs half and half but you guys are taking up more space
First question, have you actually talked to him about this? Youâre in a tricky spot right now. My husband covered basically everything when I was laid off for the first stretch of pandemic this year. And there have been times where Iâve had to cover majority of bills when he was off for being sick.
Its 50/50 in that aspect. One picks up where the other cannot. So first, talk to him, tell him youâre uneasy about being able to afford your part of rent and ask of he and the roommate can help pick up some slack atleast till youâre working more. Theres nothing unreasonable about your request especially since day care would cost way more than your 3rd in the bills anyways (im just guessing cause daycare is expensive)
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When we bought our first home we got a joint accounts(savings/checking) We put a set amount in there for all joint bills. Basically a percentage of our paychecks. The remainder of our checks went into our own personal accounts for whatever we wanted our personal car notes we had before we got together. Worked for us. We always thought it was a good idea for us each to still have our own accounts. I donât know how many times over the years he has been asked âyour wife allows you to have your own accountâ âyour wife allows you to buy thatâ umm Iâm his wife not his mother. He still has his own money too. We have a joint account that we ensures everything else is taken care of. He doesnât care about the crazy amount of books a buy on a weekly a basis 
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Can you actually charge for looking after both yourls kids ? Thatâs ridiculous. âŚ
U chose to be with a man with a child, ALSO u chose to stay home with them instead of sending them to daycare so u can have more money for everything, what did u expect?
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If you dont have the money because of your children, he needs to make up the difference. Thats that on that.
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If you tell him you need help paying your portion and heâs not willing, heâs a roommate not a boyfriend.
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So you stay home to watch âyoursâ anyway. He thought so u can watch âmineâ too. If u were able to pay ur 3rd before while only staying home for âyoursâ y canât you still? Probably be easier on you if u helped him get his license and car. Save u both some money.
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Get out of this ârelationshipâ. Doesnât sound as though he thinks you are the one
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Is it a relationship or a business arrangement??
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Iâve done it every way. Best relationship I was in we put all of our checks in a pile, paid bills with it and then split what ever was left for spending money.
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Iâd figure up how much you save by not paying daycare and that gets deducted from your portion. If the bills go over then sure, split that by 3rds. And split groceries because everyone has to eat.
With covid, heâs barely worked since March, so my income is keeping us afloat right now. Years ago, when I stayed home, he paid for everything. When we both work, it all goes into the same bank account. The only separate account that I have is for child support for my son. He has one too, but we combine our incomes and just pay the bills and all household goods.
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Between me and my partner we have 7 children, I have 2 to someone else and he has 2 to other people and then we have had triplets together. Any money that we get is ours, not his, not mine but ours. We speak about money and deal with it together and do it that way and it works. Everyone is different though so what works for some wont work for others. But as is comes to the children. All mine⌠our triplets and my 2 I had before this relationship live with us and his other 2 he had to other people he was with previously dont live with us but come at weekends and itâs me that looks after all of them 99% of the time but I dont expect more money to be mine or anything as thatâs part of the relationship. I see them as my own too and care for them just the same as mine. You both need to sit down and have a proper chat about it and see what way would suit you best especially if you have got another child on the way too.
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You should be payed for babysitting.
I picked and signed his check, we paying bills and raising a family
Iâm putting my Dave Ramsey cap on. He would say, youâre basically roommates because youâre not married. So you need to pay your fair share of the bills and rent. The child is his, not yours, so you are a babysitter at that point and would need to be compensated appropriately.
Tf you having kids together for while splitting bills AND having a roommate? I mean I get not being able to afford living alone as a mom but you have a man and a roommate and your talking about splitting bills⌠perhaps your roommate should only pay 1/4 then seems how thereâs 3 of you and 1 of themâŚ
Yâall, when we got together we were too broke to have separate bank accounts. Now we arenât, and we know our spending habits so itâs not an issue. We worked it out before we settled down and made a whole family out of it. You gotta think ahead and make it work before that kid comes along.
All this should have been discussed way before yall moved in together.
Youâre not âwatching his childâ youâre parenting and stay at home parents arenât paid. So thereâs that.
Also if itâs a tight situation, divide the bills into percentages. You all pay a certain percent of your income instead of even split.
Well it sounds like you need to have a discussion with him. Your saving him in childcare- the portion your saving him should be deducted from rent. Buy your foods seperately- Iâve community lived with kids and let me tell you theirs nothing like a long damn day your toddler wants chicken nuggets you planned to cook them but the roommate ate them all.
so then at late hrs after a long day youâve got to try to convince a toddler that some pasta is just as goodâŚ
Also, if yâall havenât come up with some sort of living agreements and boundaries- do that right away.
My parents were married for 62 years. They shared one account. Mom paid the bills, and shopped for their needs. My dad never worried because he knew that all was taken care of. If they ever fought about money, we the children never knew⌠My parents always had given us a roof over our heads, food on the table, and clothes on our back. A relationship is 50/50, but each have to give their 100%. My grandpa taught me one of the most beautiful lessons of love⌠Nothing in this world is for free. Not even love, you have to work at it. So if there is a notion how does a couple split anything in their relationship 50/50, maybe they should step back, take a deep breath, and examine how their current way of thinking/living, may affect their future together.
I really try not to judge people who donât have everything as OURS but if it works for your relationship then thatâs all that matters.
Personally everything goes into one account, I Pay the bills just because, we each spend money as needed and talk with each other before we make big purchases
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No. My bf and I split the rent when we first moved in. He paid cable and hot water. I paid electric and bought food. Since pandemic hit Iâve been home with my daughter since she has to do remote learning. He makes way more then I did. During pandemic I was getting the extra $600 a week so I paid for more outings and things for the house. Now that my extra unemployment is gone he pays all the rent and the rest has stayed the same.
Depends if you discussed it and agreed before you cut your hours. You canât just cut your hours and than him to pick up the slack unless he had expressly agreed to financial changes prior.
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13 years- we donât mix money, we each pay a percentage of our income. Currently I work from home partially and care for our 2 children. I pay the phone, groceries, my car insurance, preschool fees. He pays mortgage, cable, his car insurance, our health & home insurance, trash, water and electric.
We will never mix money but scale it so our spending is based on our individual incomes. This way we each get credit in our own names and trust each other to do our parts.
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My fiance has ssdi so that covered for all of our rent and billsâŚi did offer to pay many of times but he always refused and any extra money we had we got extra stuff. We had food stamps so we didnât need money for food. We only split the food stamps cause he had it and i had it and we both had parttime jobs. My advice is do what u think is right for you. If your ok with the situation then do it if ur not speak up and sit everybody down and figure out a plan
Iâm a stay home mom right now n my husband works. We have 2 boys. He makes the money n I handle bills n everything else in the house. Wen I worked, I worked days he didnât work n he worked days I didnât so there was always someone home wit the kids. N even that I still handled the bills from both our paychecks. If I saw he had the funds Iâd use his card or if I had it I use mine n if we had it combined then I do it that way. We nvr said âu pay this n Iâll pay thatâ it was âwe in this togetherâ. Wen we have money left over we always split it into savings n between us so we could have lil on us just incase we see something we can buy like lunch or if one has the kids they could get them a ice cream if they wanted one. Money in my opinion should nvr b a issue in a relationship cz if u guys r together to b together then that shouldnât matter. Thatâs kids play in my eyes. Thereâs no âu pay this n I pay thatâ itâs âwe pay thisâ. Straight to the point
We go off who makes more. My husband has a better paying job then i do so he pays most the bills. I also donât work as much due to being home with our kid. She technically im still working but being a parent doesnât pay so he steps in. Its a team effort. He pays for our house and I make it a home for him to come back to and be able to relax and enjoy his time off.
First mistakeâŚMoving in with a child. Youâre just a room mate with benefits. âPlaying houseâ as it were. Lots of outs for everyone with no true commitments. Youâve sold yourself short. With another baby on the way itâs a disaster in the making. If you love him, why not hold out for marriage? Now THATâS a commitment that a man thatâs truly in love makes. Sounds to me like he just wants someone to help pay the rent and take care of his child. Itâs cheaper than child care. Or is it you? Good luck. I can see where this is going but you probably wouldnât want to hear it.
In one of my college class back in the day it was suggested that if you donât want to combine finances with your SO then you get a joint account and each contribute an equal amount of your paycheck (like 35%, or 45%, or what ever you need it to be to pay the joint bills). This way the one who makes more would contribute more $ but the same percentage of their pay. That account would be used for joint expenses such as rent, water, electric, even gas if your driving him to work.
This is truly and individual situation. Every relationship is different. I am a stay at home mom and my husband works and pays all the bills. Both of our names are on everything (house, bank account, phones, vehicles, etc). Some people do want to pay everything right down the middle. Some are in between. If you choose to keep your money separate and loom at it like his / mine instead of ours, then I personally think that you should not have to pay equal bills to him if you are working less to take care of your family. But your boyfriendâs opinion is really what matters. Every relationship is different
Let him know that you need a little more help with the bills because you have to cut back your work hours to take care of the kids
Why should you split anything with yall both have kids live together as a family. When my bf and I decided to live together we decided to put our money together so we can save and build for our future.
This is a touchy subject for some couples. I would sit down and talk about combining your expenses since you watch the kids and dont make the same amount of money. If combining expenses is not an option I would sit with him and discuss your opinion and why you feel he should cover all or part of ur portion of rent. You can even do some research so you have amounts that he would pay for care if you werent home. Also since you are having a baby yall should talk about a financial plan for when you go on maternity leave.
We split the bills! My bf has no kids/i have 2 still at home.he pays mortgage and insuranceâŚi pay utilities and food. We also have our own bills we pay like credit cards and auto insurance. The house repairs we split. I wi as married before for 16yrs to a man who was financially irresponsible so this works for usâŚand we both know where our.money is/isnt going.
That sounds like a roommate to me. Iâd say cut the ties. And w a baby on the way there is no room for a roommate.
He pays rent with his salary and council tax, half food shop. I use my universal credit for utilities, then itd credit cards after that
No joint accounts. My husband pays his Bills along with Rent and Child Care. I pay my Billâs, along with Cable and Insurances.
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How many hours a week do you watch his child while heâs working? Take that times $3 and deduct that from your portion of the bills. Or tell him he can pay a daycare so you can work more.
Together for over 3 years and have one son together. Our incomes are joint in the bank account. Never have we did his money and my money. He makes about 4x I do and I work at least 6 days a week. I work night as he works days. We use the same account I pay all the bills and budget all the money and just let him know where we are at. It seemed to be working great as we have no issues.
Iâd still split everything equally unless he makes a significant amount more than he can pay 100 or 2 more than you.
Nah, married and one account. His money is my money and my money is his money. I only work part time and he makes a lot more than I do.
10 years together. And on maternity leave currently I give him 500 to the bills. But he earns more than me xx
Im sahm to our kids. He makes the money and i use our account to make the payments. Itâs all in or nothing.
U should be paid for watching his son and transport. Or u become a real couple and pool yr money to pay your family bills. The other tenant pays their third. Frankly considering u r together with kids and another coming i find that this demand u pay 1/3 ridiculous and wrong.
I believe whatâs mine is his and whatâs his is mine we take care of each other if I pay Billâs with my money then he takes care of me the rest of the month and vice versa
Only one way to do it right and Rick Thompson got it on the money. Talk to ya man, and let him know⌠itâs time to adult
Charge him for your time.!
This sounds like its gonna fail
My husband and myself have been together for 5 years now. Weâve just opened a joint bank account and will each pay ÂŁ500 into the account to cover bills x
Tyler Painter how I feel about splitting rent with me only working 2 days a week so we donât have to worry about child care 
When my husband and I moved in together when we were dating we got a joint bank account that we could link our separate accounts too and all the money for bills went into the pot. I had the logins for his banking info and he had mine. It wasnât just his money or just my money. Every decision we made after that was a joint decision.
If your a couple then there really shouldnât be half/3rds. And if you are pretty much home then no too. Itâs ours not his and mine. Also if u loss hours to stay home with (our) kids then once again that is (our) family.
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for starters discuss contraception if you are on such a âcouple-budgetâ
Are you a couple or just roommates with benefits ? Roommates split bills. Couples contribute to the cause.
Its not just evenly split. I also believe it depends on how much each of you are earning. For instance if he is earning say a 6 figure salary and you are just getting by, then it wouldnât be fair.
I believe you both should be left with an equal amount of excess money once the bills are paid. Sit down and work out what you each make, list all the bills and work out what you can afford to pay jn a way that doesnât cripple your excess. If it means he has to pay it all so you are both left with an equal amount then so be it.
You decided to reduce your working hours to make yourself more available to take care of the children, be it his child or your child. Youâre in a relationship so this is something that couples sometimes do.
However, if your partner cannot afford to pay the rent and bills in this way that I have suggested then you shouldnât have reduced your working hours - you were not in a comfortable enough position to do that.
Um NO you should not be especially when your having his kid.
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What are you talking about??? Youre joking right?
Well he should pay the bigger bills and u the rest like electric, heating and split the grocery shopping.Is hard with kids.If u guys really want to make it work u need to sit and talk about this in more detail.
You shouldnât have cut your time