My boyfriend and I have been together for two years now and will have our first child together in 2 months. His baby mamma has been very bitter and neglectful from the start. She has two kids from a prior relationship that she also neglects. He left her before they found out she was pregnant but took her back to make it work for their kid but couldn’t handle it. When he left her, she went crazy physically attacking him multiple times in front of the kids. When we got together, she went off the handle calling 50+ times a day screaming and threatening us and even held his son from him twice. He was granted an emergency court hearing, and they gave her certain days she can have their son. We can sometimes go 5-6 weeks before hearing anything from her, and when she does have him he isn’t bathed, fed properly, made to brush his teeth, wear proper clothes for the weather meaning no hats or coats and always comes homesick, his nails are always long and dirty when he comes back from her house. They all share a bed with her in a house with five other people. She is always meeting men online and bringing them around the kids. She even sends her other kids here for weeks on occasions and does not text or call about the other kids while they are here. Children and youth have been involved. There are many other things that she has done not to us but to the kids. Refused to give them medicine prescribed by the dr, neglecting to take them to the dr, sending their son home with very bad diaper rashes, the list goes on and on. And EVERYTHING is documented. So my question is how hard it would be to get full custody, taking a kid from his mother? And would the court take into consideration all the police reports from her attacking him, the emergency session hearing, children and youth being involved, her sending her other kids here and that he and I have a child together?
Just go for it you got nothing to lose and everything to gain
Well sounds like you guys have a pretty good case to get full custody.
Next time she does it get her for abandonment. Then it shouldn’t be a issue.
File for an order of protection for the child against the mother, get that granted and you will have a really good chance at limiting her to supervised visits only.
DOCUMENTATION. That is going to be your nail in the coffin. Otherwise it’s gonna be a long and bitter fight and will be mostly aimed in favor of her despite the crazy. Document everything. Take mounds of pictures of the kids condition. Write down the times and dates you have any of the kids and for how long. Also how long she goes without making contact. Try to get a picture of the living situation at her home. Record (if your state allows it) phone conversations with her and save and print out text messages and bring them to court. Proving actual abandonment is very hard. DOCUMENT EVERYTHING. I would know. I have some physical/legal custody of my daughter.
Sounds like you wouldn’t have a hard time
You need a good lawyer. Document dates times everything. Take pictures too. Take parenting classes for yourself. Looks good in court.
I really hate those terms “baby mama” and “baby daddy” . Whatever happened to calling them “the ex”?
I don’t know what state you are in, but in some states it is almost impossible to take kids away from the mothers. I had a friend in Indiana who tried extremely hard to get custody and couldn’t. The mother was a drug addict. He stayed vigilant and always did the right thing for the girls. Now the girls are grown and the mother is out of the scene. If anything, stay strong and do what you can for the children, regardless of the outcome.
You can go to the library of your local court house …
And …file yourself without an attorney.
Go to the library in the courthouse … ask for the custody filing binder…
It will walk you step by step through the paperwork
You’ll fill out the paperwork…
Pay a filing fee…
See a judge that day…
And if you can prove that the child’s welfare’s in danger
They’ll grant you temp full custody… the same day you file…
A court order will be written for you …
Until …a hearing can be scheduled between both parties for a perm custody arrangement …
and your next hearing will be a mediation hearing…
If both parties can’t agree on custody… you will then go to trail.
It is very possible so don’t give up… took me 4 years of being very vigalent, documenting everything, getting evidence, court dates, the egg donor being a great actress and them not even listening to me for a while,BUT I kept on it and didn’t give up finally proving her the crackhead she is… have had full custody for almost 3 years now🙌
I would get advice from a lawyer free consultation( every state has different laws ) then from there get the paper work to file. Do your research. Also, take a journal of phone calls dates and times things that are important. Good luck.
not to rock the boat as not my business but the woman you are talking about could possibly be in a bad way really struggling with things and it’s all got too much and begging for help … is there any way you could all come together yourselves and work out what’s best for all children and parents involved … does she have any help her side like social workers or someone from child protection team just going through court is a long process and maybe distressing for the kids … if you feel it is what needs to be done for the health and safety of the kids then obviously that’s what needs to happen… Good Luck with what you and your partner decide to do
Take all your evidence to court. At the very least, visitation should be limited to supervised.
It took me an my husband almost 7 years to gain custody. Of his 2 with very similar circumstances very hard to take custody from a mom. Key thi gs that helped us were doctor,dentist,an schools plus we kept a calander that i wrote everything dwn that happened that day. Helps to refresh your memory when you are in court good luck
What do the kids want? Because it’s not about you.
He sounds like shit, you better be careful.
It ia very hard in Louisiana to take a child from the mother BUT it sounds lik w you have a good case.I only know this because I went thru this with my step daughter
Take pictures of the child before he goes to her and when u get him back then take it to the lawyer or even make a call to CPS if u think the kids are in danger
If this is all true you would be an idiot for NOT taking her to court and getting full custody
One thing I will tell you is the court doesn’t want to hear from you unless if you are married to him. You will have nothing to do with this he will go in there and speak for himself. They don’t always care to see proof, my ex tried to bring proof and the judged it even look at it. You think they don’t know that parents are gonna come there with papers bashing each other on who is the better looking parent? They are just going to choose what’s best for the child In that will start with weather in at the children are going to school and have a decent place to live and food on the table. You getting involved with all the pettiness coming up with one excuse after another on why the mom should have her children is irrelevant unless of the husband could speak for himself. I do suggest you mind your business and worry about your own babies that will be coming into the world.
Go for it! Take everything you have and lawyer up girl
Yes they will take into account police reports of violent behavior from her. They will also take very seriously her seeming inability to control her anger in front of the children. Its a tough road in a situation like that. I wish you luck.
Document everything! Screenshots, txts, pictures…
Check with Rutherford county legal aid they may provide you with an attorney free of charge
With all that documented I do not see why the judge wouldn’t grant full custody. Every time he’s dropped off, make a video of him getting there and walking up to you guys. Sounds like you two have been on top of getting documents. If you haven’t, get statement from drs as well. That’s always a big one!
Get married to show stability in your relationship
Keep documenting EVERYTHING. Even the diaper rashes. Take pictures when he gets back of the neglect. Have the judge or social worker or therapist talk to him about his mom and what goes on. If you give them more then enough evidence of neglect, you should win custody.
Most definitely. Or you could call DCF. He would have no problem getting custody. Poor kids. Get them away from her. They will grow up messed up.
Kudos to u n being an awesome woman to EVEN take her other kids in. I know it’s not their fault but it takes a heart filled mother to do that. I hope things go ur way n those kids have a better up bringing. Good luck n bless u n ur family. 
Stuppeed people to get themselves in this mes, they deserve to pay for it
If you have everything documented, you should have a pretty strong case for sole custody
If you are in the south the court will hold not being married against you. 
It depends on how hard she is going to fight but it sounds with all of the documentation and police reports you should be able to get the child but everything depends on the judge and attorneys.
Apply for adoption of the child or children, you need not be married to do this.
Unless the child is in imediat danger full custody is unlikely. Unless the other party does not comply with court orders. See a good lawyer to get a concept of the law. It is very confusing but is there to protect the child.
The court likely won’t take all visitation from her. She may wind up with supervised visitation.
Definitely consult an attorney
All would be considered. Lawyer up and go to court!
First it depends on the judge. Some judges continue to give mothers chances even after a long list of occurrences like this. However, a lot of judges aren’t as concerned with keeping the kids with the mother as they are giving the kids a proper home. I can’t imagine it would be too hard to gain custody as long as everything is well documented. You can always call an attorney in your area and set up a consultation (which are normally free).
Consult with an attorney. I hope he has police reports or text messages…something to prove what hes saying. It isnt easy to get custody from a mother.
You having a child together doesnt make a difference.
Talk to a lawyer or something if it’s that bad. They would have legit answeres for you and be able to help 
.
With all of that happening I’m not understanding why child services hasn’t already removed them from her home. Go up there with recordings of the phone calls, pictures of him after he comes back to y’all and whatever other evidence you have. Instead of going to child protective services go straight to the sheriff’s office. Idk something about this is unsettling to me. If her other kids get sent there for WEEKS at a time, when do you decide that something isn’t right and call the cops? You could have directly had charges pressed for child endangerment and assault.
You definitely want an attorney if you haven’t already gotten one.
If you can prove all of the neglect, it shouldn’t be too difficult. Also, one of the first things DCS checks for is that every child has their own bed. Withholding necessary medication and missing doctor visits or not taking them when they are legitimately sick is also a DCS case.
Courts should take into consideration the police reports and everything else that is “provable”
Take this to court and get all children if you have the room and if they are siblings they can share a room boys with boys girls with girls do what is best for the children
All that will count in court but you might want to consider talking the other 2 kids or helping their fathers get them if they are suitable. I wouldn’t leave any child with a woman like that.
U said u got everything documented so there’s a great 1st step. 2nd, it does depend on the judge cuz some want kids w their moms, BUT most want them in a healthy home. I wont say it’s easy, but will be easier for him the more u got going for you guys! Best of luck w everything, but just know u r both doing everything right. Get that attorney n go for it
File for full custody and bring everything you have documented and even texts from her if she has ever said she isn’t giving them the medicine prescribed to them. How old are the other kids? If they are old enough, a judge will listen to them speak also.
Take lots of pictures for evidence.
They would consider all of it, and i think you have a pretty good shot and getting full custody.
Someone like her doesn’t deserve children 
not only does it depend on the judge you have or if you have an attorney it also depends on the state I know here in Missouri depending on what part of Missouri you are in. you have to jump through hoops to prove that a parent is not fit to have a child and trust me I know plenty of parents here that are not fit to have a child but they still have some. So what you need to do is when his child comes back to him after visiting her house if he has any rashes or he has any kind of physical signs that he’s not being treated properly even with the documented instances you have now you still need to get him to the doctor asap and have a doctor documented because the doctor at that point the doctor is required to call child protective services and that would start an emergency investigation at that point even though you’ve gone and had emergency hearings already, once CPS is involved along with the child’s doctor an emergency temporary custody hearing should happen and custody should be awarded to your boyfriend until an investigation is completed. But as always consult an attorney in your area and see what they say you should do.
Full custody is almost impossible. CPS can get involved and help, but will help her get life back in track. Not just take a child
It is very hard to be granted full custody and harder to stop visitation or remove parental rights. All of your documentation should help your case (I hope you have an attorney) but don’t get your hopes up too much. A lot of times they will issue a temporary order for physical and or legal custody and order the parent(s) to take parenting classes, have home studies, anger management etc and revisit the case upon completion. Courts do not like to take rights away from parents without exhausting all avenues to correct the issues. Keep documenting and I hope it works in your favor. Another piece of advice if you are in the courtroom. Keep your mouth shut unless you are asked to speak. Judges don’t like interference from GF/BF I’ve witnessed this first hand. Good luck.
It sounds like bio mom is depressed or having some mental issues. Could you guys suggest she receive counseling instead of taking her children away?
i’d say your best best is to try to get an attorney and i know its a big responsibility but if you’re able think about trying to get the other kids as well or perhaps seeing if they have another family member that can take them out of that situation.
The courts normally look out for the children in abusive or neglectful situations. Contact a lawyer and remove them from her care. Speak up for the children
Can you contact the other fathers involved? Or ask child services to? I would concentrate on your situation only. You aren’t responsible to the others but you certainly can start the wheels turning for them. I think you have a strong case for full custody. Good job caring for him and not turning away with all the drama.
That’s a no brainer for the courts and why DCFS hasn’t taken all the kids away is beyond me the system is broken and then we wonder why
I say you guys have a remarkably good case for what’s best fit for the child and that’s being with the father.
Wait he couldnt handle being around her n a new baby n left her what u think hes gonna do to you when you have the baby…its always easier to attack the baby momma saying she’s the bad guy…smh
It depends on the state. Your having a child with him will have no impact on the case, positive or negative. You mention the child’s nails are long when being returned? How long is the child with the mother? It would have to be several days for that to happen. The current custody arrangement will play a part. It will be difficult to gain custody of non-biological children, if that’s part of the plan, but for the biological child, get an attorney. If what you’re saying is true and there are reports to prove it, gaining full custody is possible. CPS will help her get her life together, if that’s what she wants, but if custody has been transferred to dad and he’s proven to be fit, she’ll receive visitation and perhaps an eventual 50/50 custody split. Rarely would the child(ren) be returned, once removed and put into a stable situation, especially if that stable placement is with the other biological parent. Resolved issues (ie her being abusive to bf while they were together) will likely have no impact on this situation because (I assume) it was resolved either through an arrest, dismissed charges (if filed), etc. The court will not dig up old stuff that was there prior to whatever emergency order was placed, unless the order is still in effect and custody proceedings are ongoing. Good luck!
Good luck! Sounds to me you have a great case. Take pics and document
You guys got a 100% chance that the court will give you full custody of the child since you got proof and it’s not fair for her to be treating her children badly.I wish you two luck on the case and hoping that things will change
Get the kids away. I don’t think it’d be hard, it’s too awful what’s happening…it won’t be easy but you’re the kids only hope xx
Take it to a judge and ask for custody. Or you could ask for primary physical custody and Grant her visitation certain days/times.
Call CPS and let them see how the child is living document everything takes photos of the kid every time the kid comes over every time that she calls how long it’s been since the last time that you have seen the kid are heard once you have proved then go to court and then you should be able to get custody
Your best bet is to get supervised visits for the mom. A judge never wants to take away kids from a mother. Even if there is problems and issues it’s still hard to prove, and a judge would much rather give supervised visitation.
Does she have a drug problem or mental health problems? It has to be one. Get custody and make the courts order her to get help or she doesn’t see her child. It’s not fair to the child in these cases. What’s wrong with some mothers. It’s hard enough when my kids are gone to their dads for 2 days. I like my home clean, my children looking nice because they’re so beautiful! I just don’t get it. The courts should have no problem giving you custody in my eyes. And the most respect to you also.
Ask to go on frony of the judge again. THAT youne
You nerd new visiti g struture set up. Yake pictures of him beforr he goes,pictures of him in her care, and pics of when he comeshome. You might have to hire a private detevtive to get shots of ybe baby othet kids. While in her care but it will be well worth it.
Shouldn’t be that hard to get custody of the children , especially if you have it all documented, make sure you have copies of all this to present to the court at custody hearing. and if it’s that bad for the poor babies when they’re with her ask for supervised visits only cause your worries about the children’s well-being
Shouldn’t be too difficult with documentation.
So- you want just the one kid then? Also, how many times did these things happen? Once? Twice? Did you record anything? Are you married to the father? If not, you don’t matter for shit. You just want your pretty family without the ex around. That you’ve had for two whole years and already have a kid 
Good luck with that. You seem like a super upstanding and moral person. And FYI, if people would stop hounding someone and help instead of “calling in the government” less bad things would happen. All calling cops and cps does is alienate someone. I can see through you sweetheart.
Get his baby and some how help with CPS for the orher children like now. Please.
You need to get the voicemails, call record, photos ect. Just to help prove your case. Then Get another emergency court date. Maybe even go for a lawyer.
Zero percent chance if you don’t file a petition and try to gain custody.
While it’s great you guys want to take that next step for his son I can’t help but feel bad for his siblings that will continue to be abused and neglected or put into the system while at the same time having their little brother ripped from their lives
you can get custody with a very good lawyer. Keep all records of incidents, take photo’s of everything and present this to a lawyer or child welfare!!
They will appoint s guardian ad litem for the child home investigations and all police reports will be taken note of
If you feel the children are in immediate danger call CPS. If you can retain an attorney. Present your evidence to get the current parenting plan modified show a change in circumstance.
You can also go to local courthouse to see if any other CDV cases CDV cases help big time especially if they were ever in front of any of her children
It all depends on the judge really
She needs to be delt with, the poor kids don’t deserve this.
dont think they will fully take her rights away but you can get it so she only has supervised visitation… but its worth a try if shes that bad… yes they will take all but the fact that you two have a child together into consideration… make sure you continue to document and get in touch with the lawyer… start the paperwork now…