Normally I’m not this person, but you 100% sound bitter. Just because he does things that gets under your skin, doesn’t mean he deserves less time with his daughter. The agreement is very fair, you both just need to learn how to coparent and that will come with time. Stop thinking about this so selfishly, your daughter is the one being most effected.
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They won’t change it just because you say so 
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(numbering to keep thoughts in order. Not to be hateful)
- there is a difference between 50/50 legal custody and 50/50 physical custody. I’m assuming given what you’ve said that this is pertaining to 50/50 physical custody.
- Unless he is specifically telling you he has done and is doing these things out of spite, then that is an assumption on your part. Which is exactly how your lawyer, and any judge would see it. You two obviously don’t have a very good co-parenting relationship, which is going to make it so neither of you see things clearly. You’re too hung up on your feelings about each other…to see the other as just your child’s other parent. You’re going to assume (for example) that if he gives your child chocolate before returning her it was just to wind her up and piss you off. Even if in reality he was just wanting to give her a treat.
- Unless he’s abusive, neglectful, has issues with substance abuse, or is unable to provide a safe environment for your child there’s no real reason to remove 50/50 physical custody. This is a stable schedule. You cannot punish HIM as a parent because you have more physical custody of your other children or because you don’t like him. Again, this seems to be what’s going on. Even your own lawyer sees this…and is advising you on the best legal recourse for yourself and your child. Just because it’s not what you want to hear…doesn’t make it wrong.
I have a 50/50 agreement with my sons father and he doesn’t pay child support at all. So consider yourself blessed to have that extra help. It’s definitely not necessary.
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Can you maybe try mediation first? Bc it sounds more like he’s not a bad dad, he just has anger issues towards you and you do towards him. And just remember, a lot more times now moms don’t always get full custody automatically. So you could take him to court but it might not work in your favor. Which may be why your attorney isn’t “helping you”.
Sounds like you care more about what you get then what your child gets lol that’s what people fail to realize your child isint a chess piece
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If he’s involved in her life why would you want to take that away? It’s one thing to have this custody agreement and he doesn’t show up at all, and it was just a means to lower support. But it sounds like he’s involved and just makes parenting decisions you don’t agree with and you’re not getting the child support you wanted. Unfortunately that’s just a part of raising a child separately. If he is and wants to be involved don’t try to take that away for your convenience. It’s not about you, it’s about your daughters best interest.
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U can’t do anything about that . And she deserves to be with her father also a different lawyer won’t change the outcome if he is stable and not unfit they won’t change the agreement. Not sure why u would want to take time away from your child spending time with her dad to make your schedule easier and more stable find a routine and stick to it
Your attorney is paid by you for you. If you find that you’re not getting the services you’ve paid for than a hundred percent go elsewhere.
Even if you lawyer does what you want you will lose. There doesn’t seem to be legit issues for dad to lose HIS TIME with HIS CHILD. Your first issue was MONEY!!!
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So what I read was you want to control everything and not ok with less child support
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Wow…some of these responses 
Taking into consideration you didn’t provide many details about your situation, all you’re saying is you want to give your child a stable schedule with you other 3 kids who are always with you. There’s no crime in that. Kids need stability and if she isn’t getting it with her dad then yes, find a different attorney. If you have serious concerns about how the lack of scheduling and parenting on his end will impact her later in life, fight for her. This man wanted 50/50 custody just so he didn’t have to pay more in child support and yet y’all are bashing this mom for looking for advice 
My ex told me if I ever asked him for more money, he’d go for 50/50, I never asked for more money and guess who has their kids all the time? Me, because it only mattered to him if it meant he was going to “lose money”. So my opinion, do what is best for YOUR child and maybe get advice from another attorney and see their viewpoint on it all.
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You’re so lucky he does 50/50. My ex left me with 4 children and couldn’t even show up once a year to see his.
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Different attorney yesss
As long as he’s paying his support on time and he’s picking her up as scheduled then there’s nothing you can do. My daughter’s baby daddy never showed up for his time he never payed his support and made a big scene in court and said he wanted to give up his rights, judge asked him why he said so he didn’t have to pay support since he didn’t get his child. Judge told him he has his time he chooses not to get him and he will pay his support weather he has him or not or he can go to jail. Just be glad he wants to spend time with his child. My grandson tells us all the time My daddy don’t want me My daddy don’t love me. It’s heart breaking 
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Sounds to me like your bitter. Let your daughter have the time she can with him. My real mom did this to me and my dad and I absolutely will not talk to the cunt because she took my dad away, all because he was in the military and she cheated on him then had him paying 1,000 a month which she used for drugs
I don’t know if ya’ll can’t read or you just can’t comprehend what you read but she never said she’s taking her from him. She literally said she doesn’t want to do that. She also made it clear that he’s making co-parenting difficult, which is something a lot of people do to hold on to the little bit of control they have over someone. She also said that he only wanted 50/50 so he didn’t have to pay child support, which would make you mad just as much as anyone, especially if he made splitting 50/50 difficult.
Some of you are so ready to jump down someone’s throat on facebook to get out your pent up feelings or something and it’s extremely weird.
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The judge will likely not give you full custody on the grounds the Father is difficult to deal with. There are communication programs through the court the may help with less contact. You can even request E-mail contact only. Pick up/drop off of your child can always take place at a neutral place like a police station. My son’s Dad is a piece of work as well. Child support was never important to me (he never paid it & I didn’t depend on it.) A court likely won’t give you 50/50 based on non-payment either. As long as he is good to your child and not a danger to them a court probably won’t give you full custody. Pretty much, just because your ex is an a**hole to you isn’t grounds for full custody. I hope it gets better for you over time. Stick to the court order and have him follow it. Avoid unnecessary communication & let him be bitter by himself.
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Yes - if your attorney isn’t listening to - and/or explaining why - get rid of them.
Your attorney probably isn’t helping you because chances are you’ll lose, if there is an arrangement in place, why would the judge decide otherwise?
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Just because you and dad can’t get along doesn’t mean a judge is going to change her schedule. You really left a lot to wonder on. How is he being difficult? Is your daughter safe happy and loved with him? If so, there’s no reason to change her schedule again.
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sorry to say, even if you both don’t agree on things, he has every right to have this type of agreement, He is her father. Having it changed is what you want, not him. Remember he is her father
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Lmfao they will not change 50/50 or make any changes unless there is a severe change in circumstance. Be careful. If you keep acting up over 50/50, they’ll take your time from you.
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If he’s not a safety issue and good to her then you just got to deal with it girlfriend 
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You’re simply just selfish.
Put your feeling in a box and toss it in the garbage because court and people don’t give a ** about it.
If he is doing it right, none care if you don’t like him or bla bla, fathers want their kids full time too but you never hear a man whining about it, because it is what it is, he the only one who can mess it up, and until he does. You can’t take her away from him.
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You say your child’s father is difficult to work with and your attorney doesn’t want to help you, it sounds like YOU could be the problem. You didn’t say anywhere in here that he’s neglectful or your daughter could be in danger. Your reasoning to stop 50/50 is because he’s difficult to work with, does things out of spite and you want her home full time with your 3 other daughters. You can get another attorney but they will probably tell you the same thing as your current attorney. 
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YOU pay the attorney, they work for you. If you’re feeling like they’re not helping you and listening to what you want get a new one. Also if you have other kids and want to make a more stable schedule for them and this one isn’t working for that you can try to modify but you’ll need to make sure that you have a good enough reasoning why the 50/50 isn’t stable enough for the shared child. My daughters father and I don’t have 50/50 I have full physical but we have shared legal with myself having tie breaking authority. Good luck!
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Why do you feel you have the right to take 50/50 away from him? Your attorney isn’t helping you because you are wrong. What does the schedule of your other kids have to do with this kids schedule? The father has just as much right as you, and posts like this really set us back. Woman get mad when men don’t help, but god forbid they want equal rights to THEIR kids. Get it together ladies 
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I would just see if he would agree to me having the full custody if i agree to still take the 100 less child support, win win,money isnt everything, and the child will be stable
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Sounds like there’s a lot YOU WANT to happen but the relationship between father and child isnt a YOU thing.
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You can try to hear what another attorney has to say but it might make matters worse
You don’t have to put up with his fighting with you he’s probably just doing it to bug you I went through that with my ex he didn’t want my kids he just wanted to torture ME I would get a different attorney and fight him he don’t have your child’s best interest in mind at all it’s miserable trying to do what’s right by your child and he’s fighting against you I’ll be praying for you and your kids 
It is not his fault or his problem you chose to have more kids. That does not excuse you to take time away from HIS child also. I wish my daughters dad was around and helped out and payed his child support. I understand it is difficult to work with him, but don’t let your child suffer because you two can’t communicate and get along and parent differently. If they are happy, healthy and taken care of, let it be.
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If both parents want custody. The Judge will keep it at 50/ 50. Doesn’t really matter if he makes Co- parenting difficult. If he is a good dad to her , that all that matters.
Sounds like , you want more Child support.
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A judge isn’t going to change the order because yoy want more money 
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You can try a new attorney. Or you can step back and realize maybe why you seem so angry…is it really him being petty or is it that you aren’t getting your way?
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The fact that you started off with child support, says it all. Stop trying to take your kids dad away from them. It is fair, why are you trying to be unfair just because you want more $??
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You should keep it at 50/50. She has two homes, that means 2 schedules. You just gotta do hire out the best way to work with it
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Honestly if you have 50/50 custody I do t understand why he pays child support you have her the same amount of time so neither should be paying the other. Just bc YOU want your child on the same schedule as the other children is not a reason to change the custody arrangement. What are things that you think are done out of spite and anger? There’s a lot of information left out.
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Sounds like you need to listen to your attorney the judge doesn’t care who or what you have at home that isn’t your daughter or your ex problem the judge isn’t going to like the matter that your basically trying to take the father’s time away I have seen it go just the opposite and the dad end up with joint custody and the father being the primary custodian that means the child lives with him and you then get state visitation set up by whatever your state guidelines are usually every other weekend and split and alternating holidays your only reason for this is he is difficult Sounds to me like you are just as difficult to deal with I would reevaluate my thoughts on this as it could totally backfire on you sounds like you just want that 100 more in support rather than to continue to let your child have strong bond and relationship with her father smh women like this give us good mothers a bad name
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You grey rock him.
No communication unless its about child
Then you make short and to the point.
No small talk even when he message how bad you are or anything else just ignore it unless its to do with ur daughter. This works it takes a bit. But it works
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Judges don’t even care if you have video documentation of abuse. Most judges are male and they are going to side with him regardless. Save your money.
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Sounds like you want this for two reasons. 1) he’s paying less in child support and you want more. And 2) it messes with YOUR schedule. Grow up…
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Unless there is a real reason why the father shouldn’t hv 50/50 then its not up to you or attorney. Unless you hv proof and valid reasons to hv ur daughter full time no attorney is going to help you fight for full custody. Now a daya is 50/50 unless a parent can prove that the other shouldn’t hv half custody and prove it. Its going to be up to you two to come to an agreement. If he just doesn’t want to pay all childsupport ask him if you acceot current child support and not take any more if you can hv full custody other than that nothing you can do unless he is an unfit father for half time.
If you have a problem you most certainly can change the custody order if the judge thinks it’s necessary
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Depends on the circumstance of what’s going on
Do you pay him child support when he has her? If not then why is he paying u if its 50/50?
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If it’s court ordered he has to do what the paperwork says or have him charged with violating a court order.
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Easy peasy… get another attorney that’ll work for you.
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Im quite sure he has to agree to the order Change. When I filed ours in my divorce I put I wanted soul custody of our two and allowed him 50/50 visitation with no child support. He could had not agreed then we would had went to court for a judge to rule which could always not come out in your favor. I wanted soul simply because I do EVERYTHING and always have even in the marriage… another words, try to talk to him and your lawyer maybe finding a meeting ground.
Definitely a different attorney. Your attorney works for you, you don’t work for him/her.
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With the very little information given, I think 50/50 is in your daughter’s best interest.
She needs her dad just as much as she needs you. He honestly shouldn’t even be paying any support at all.
It isnt about what you want. It’s about what she needs. And unless he is harming HER in some way, she needs him. No matter hw you feel about it.
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You can definitely try a different attorney. But it sounds like the one you have just knows you don’t have grounds to change the order.
50/50 should be standard, barring extenuating circumstances.
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It’s really sad but I’ve been dealing with almost the exact situation with my ex and our daughter is almost 4. I tried the new attorney thing, looking into trying to get out but once you set up a parenting plan something significant has to happen to get it changed such as drug use, physical abuse, something along those lines for any kind of change and I guess depending what your states like it’s just really hard unfortunately. My BD is just like yours makes EVERYTHING difficult has tried everything under the sun to make it seem like I’m the bad parent, refuses to co parent with me and has even gone against our parenting plan and still gets away with it. And continues to try and get to me through our daughter and it’s really unfortunate because as I always say I have thick skin I can deal with his bull shit but she doesn’t and he’s taking it out on her and no one seems to see that other then our co parenting counselor and he bailed on that too. So my best advise is documenting everything for a just in case, pick and choose your battles because it’s never going to stop and you’re only in year one, and keep you head down and do what you can to provide the best life for your baby in your home. The system sucks these days and I see soooo many situations like this and it’s sad because the child is the one who suffers we’re moms we can deal with it but the children can’t and them understanding is even harder!
If he’s upholding his part then leave it alone. If he’s not taking her when he’s supposed to and just trying to save the 100 bucks then I would keep records of whenever he misses time and then contact your attorney. If your attorney isn’t for you then you certainly need a new one.
Literally document every data Ol of what the father is doing to not make things as court ordered. It may take a few months, but it can work. Literally dates time & situation that is concerning, such as not returning as agreed but make sure when he gets her an agreed time was documented. Also see if you can have him to sign what was agreed on. Some will if you say I just want to keep up with the records for both of us. We r something. If he won’t sign then state he refused.
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If 50/50 was awarded then you have to prove there’s a reason to change it. And disagreeing on things isn’t a reason.
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Modifications of custody usually require a material change in circumstances. Wanting the same schedule as your other children, convenience for you and your household and less child support are not valid changes in circumstances. He’s being spiteful yet you’re the one wanting to change an entire custody agreement because he makes you mad. Get over it. Life is full of people who are gonna make you mad. 
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As long as he isn’t being abusive or negligent with your daughter he has every right to have her 50% of the time. Just because it is an inconvenience to you it’s not her fault. She will adjust to a new schedule and the father and yourself need to sit down like adults and come to a compromise. I’m not sure why your granted child support if you have equal parenting time. If you guys cannot come to an agreement then maybe get into mediation and work with a mediator to come to an agreement on what to do. They also have some apps that parents can communicate though vs each other’s phone which is mediated by 3rd party to help parents as well. One I have heard of is Our Family Wizard. It’s a win win as it will show how your communicating and if there are issues it can be shown to the judge if adjustments need to be made. Try to work with dad. Your daughter deserves to have equal time between you two. Just because you all aren’t together it isn’t her fault and she deserves to have equal time between you both.
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I would reflect on what your daughter wants or needs. It sounds the issues are between him & you not her. So you two should be settling that between the two of you and not dragging your daughter into it.
Many children thrive in split families. So think about how it’ll impact her if she is not seeing her father as often?
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This sounds very selfish . If you share 50/50 he shouldn’t be paying anything . He’s supporting her while she’s with him and so it should be up to you to support her while she’s with you . Also to take her from her dad just to balance them all on the same time is wrong . She needs both parents . She’s happy right ? So why take her from him just so you can have all at the same time . Sounds like your just trying to get money out of him for your selfish needs .
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If he is taking her during his time, and being a good dad, then suck it up buttercup. 50/50 with a good dad is the ideal arrangement. Yall aren’t together for a reason so it will be hard at times to get along and agree. The best option is to lay out some ground rules you both follow, then allow the other parent to parent how they please. Maybe a set bedtime, and a no cussing rule for both homes but everything else is up to the parent in charge.
He may or may not have done 50/50 to have lower child support but as long as he’s a good dad, that’s what matters. Bring up the child support being less, then saying you want full custody for a bs reason makes it look like you want to use your child for the extra money.
What a mess…
All I see here is “I want to do whatever I want to do for me”. No consideration for the child at all. Parallel parent, ignore his nonsense, and let him help raise his child. She’s a person not a pawn!
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I don’t think that’s enough reason to stop access that’s how a court would see it i dont think it’s fair a child shouldn’t see their dad unless there’s good reason like risk or harm and that dosent seem like the case here it’s her dad end of the day weather u like it or not
It really depends on “what” he’s doing to be spiteful. If it’s things that actually threaten the well-being of your daughter, then ~ absolutely, document document document and get another attorney.
If it’s just tit for tat kind of things, and your daughter is safe/not in jeopardy, and your attorney isn’t pursuing it because they know that it won’t result in a change, it’ll probably be difficult to pursue changing that agreement. You can always get another attorney if you like, but it really just depends on what these “spite” situations are as to whether or not it’s worth taking to court.
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He would have to agree to the new terms and conditions in order for it to be changed. Unless there’s proof of something happening that would harm the child, physically or emotionally, there’s no way to change it. She deserves her dad too. You just need to learn to stop responding to him. Only contact should he through emails and only being contacted if it has to do with the child.
Absolutely … if you have to revoke the custody.
Keep a journal of each issue … and the time and date.
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Tell your lawyer who you are paying WHAT YOU WANT. If he won’t take it back to court get a new lawyer. They work for YOU! You can request a change of custody but a judge has approve it.
Absolutely, find a new attorney. Yours doesn’t want to fight.
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If u guys have 5050 he shouldn’t have to pay CS… he is every bit her father as u are her mother. The child is only 1 if u can’t figure out how to co parents it’s gonna be a long 17 yrs!! GL!!!
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Definitely get a new lawyer and if he isn’t doing things right, then yes take him back to court.
You sound like you are the spiteful one. Dad isn’t following your rules so you want full custody to force him into your rules and conditions. Do you follow dad’s rules and conditions? Probably not. If he isn’t abusive in any way, shape or form then you better grab a box of tissues to dry your tears and move on. Thank God you have a man wanting to be a daddy and let him be during HIS time with her.
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You sound super selfish. Wow. I hope dad gets to keep 50/50 custody. He has just as much right to her as you do.
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You can’t change things to make it easier for you. It’s about your daughter. People don’t realize that once you have a child with someone that is a at least 18 years commitment. That’s why they have birth control. Children aren’t toys
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If your lawyer is not doing what you ask yes fire them, they work for you and should be doing what you ask them to do not what they want
An Attorney is not hired to do whatever you want them to do. An Attorney is hired to advise a person of their legal rights within the law and advocate for you. Chances are, your Attorney may actually be doing what is right in the situation. My ex husband and I have joint (50/50) of our daughter. He does not pay child support for her, and shouldn’t have to considering he has her 50% of the time and takes care of her needs while he has her. Do he and I get along? Definitely not! He hates me with a passion and has been plenty difficult to co-parent with at times, but that has nothing to do with our daughter. I don’t know all details of your situation, but unless he is skipping out on his time and not being consistent, being neglectful to the child’s needs, physically and/or mentally abusive to the child, or has drug related issues, then why wouldn’t you want her to have a healthy and loving relationship with her father? I think that is a huge issue we face these days. Too many children without an active father in their life. I’m speaking of the ones that choose not to be active!
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You have 50/50 and still get child support payments? You already have a good deal.
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Yes if he won’t help you when you are paying him.
Can we normalize dads being involved and not living under the thumbs of mothers? Dads are parents too and sometimes the better parent at that. I said what I said.
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Does he actually have her 50% of the time?
Go to family maintenance they deal with him on support payments so you don’t have to
Wow 
so basically you want to change custody because YOU are getting $100 less from child support. I can’t believe you get any child support with 50/50 custody. You sound toxic and selfish
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If he is just making things difficult for you, but is a good dad and takes care of her then no you shouldn’t but if he’s doing nothing to be a good dad and difficult then document and get a new attorney and bring a case but don’t just take her away because it doesn’t suit your schedule that is not fair
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Yes and as soon as you can.
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Get a different attorney! But I would assume, unless he’s done something drastic, you won’t get out of it unfortunately but I’m not a lawyer, so idk
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I wish my daughter’s father would involve himself. He doesn’t help financially at all and I would prefer his presence in her life over finacial help.
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You’re going to find it difficult getting anything other than 50/50. You would have to prove that he is in some way a danger to your child. That is very difficult to prove. IMHO, you sound very spiteful and selfish to want to take your child away from her daddy because you don’t want to deal with him.
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Wow greedy ass people…
50/50 & he still pays child support. WOW! You have 3 other daughters so your 4th one shouldn’t see her dad as much because she needs to be on the same schedule as all your other children? Some woman are just selfish, selfish, selfish.
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So you say you don’t want to take her from him at all but then are talking about taking her from him?
Does dad take care of her as he should? Does he keep her on the days he is supposed to? These things matter. Your schedule doesn’t matter, you must learn to work around the new order if kid is not in danger. For the best interest of the child.
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It’s going to be very hard to get out of 50/50 unless you can prove it is unstable for your daughter most judges will not go back after a ruling unless you can prove it’s for the benefit of the child
If he takes care of her despite how u feel then leave it be. It’s about the child not you. The other kids will learn and so will she when it comes to routines etc. Sounds like your doing it for the money too.
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I don’t think a judge will care that she’s not on the same schedule as your other daughters. I think they’ll care more about being fair and keeping the dad involved 50/50
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I’m not sure… but 50/50 you do what you need to when she’s with you… he dose what he needs to when she is with him… you can’t tell him or expect him to have your rules or tell him what he can and can not so with his time… As long as he is not a danger to her or abusive.
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Wow most people would love to have an involved dad and you want to fault the both of them because it doesn’t agree with your other children. Well sorry for your bad luck maybe the other kids dad should be more involved
You didn’t name one thing negative that he does that is affecting his parenting. Stop being selfish and and spiteful back. Custody should be based solely on the interest of the child not petty battle of the ex’s.
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Yes. Get another attorney. Document every single interaction you have with him if he’s late for exchanges uses foul language or does ANYTHING. Don’t tell anyone you keep a diary of each contact. This is what my lawyers advised me to do. Make sure to document dates times and places.
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Best interest of the child is priority, not what is most convenient for the parents.
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Absolutely! One that works for YOU>
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