How should I handle this situation?

A. He should’ve been the one to move out of the house. B. If they live with you the majority of the time and this school is in your district then that’s where they go. C. Get a lawyer and have all these things put in writing. D. Good luck to you

59 Likes

The kids should go to school in the district they live in.

1 Like

Of course all the women would agree with the woman :roll_eyes::roll_eyes:

Unless you’re moving there permanently, I wouldn’t switch schools yet. It’s up to you to maintain your vehicles and be responsible for your kids and their schooling.

23 Likes

That’s how school systems work. They are supposed to (by law) be enrolled where they spend most of their time.

2 Likes

Use joint. Acct to fix car?

Sasha Magdalena Zerth not sure how you got that she chose to move out from this post. Most likely the husband stayed in their home because he was the one who could afford to stay there. Not many women choose to move into their parents house with their kids.

2 Likes

I agree they go to school closest to their primary home

Unfortunately, if you two are not able to come to an agreement, the only way around that is going to court and filing a custody petition in which one of the terms/items would be where the children are to attend school….

You need to get a lawyer. Why couldn’t he move out?

I wouldn’t change their schools, alot of changes happening for them. Maybe try to keep something consistent for them. Plus, maybe you’ll move bck by the area

You need to do what’s in best interest of your children. If you are planning on staying permanently in that area then the kids should go to school there. That’s where they will be most of the time. They need friends and stability. Your car, your housing is yours not your exes. You need to get a job to support yourself and your kids. Remember you can’t always count on child support to help you. Not all members pay it. Plus, in my eyes do you want the courts to charge him so much he can’t afford to survive or thrive? My suggestion make sure you get to claim kids in taxes to make up for a lower child support. It should even out. Get it so he helps with daycare and medical or extra curricular activities. Unless you ex is a multi millionaire or makes megga amounts than is making him go broke worth it? Get a lawyer to help you.

You stay in your house,their house…he moves, and supports those children. It’s no longer about you and him. Take care of those babies. They deserve the best. You two make it work,for them.

Why isn’t he still supporting you and the kids just as when you lived together?
You both have the same obligations.

Why did you and the kids have to move out of your home is my first question??? He should have moved out and not displaced the children.

3 Likes

Oh wow the comments… everyone saying why he stayed in the house, well maybe it was his house, even through married for 12 years there could of been a prenup involved (That doesn’t change just cause people have kids together). Or maybe it was his house before they got married and she decided to leave. Maybe this is what worked for them. Not all women are gold diggers or have the attitude what’s your is automatically mine. We don’t know the situation to assume anyhow. However as for the question mama you have to do what’s easiest for you and your children. If your planning on moving near your parents in the future then make the change. But remember kids don’t always bounce back, this is a lot of stress on them as well between the separation, living at grandmas and not near thee friends. Only you know your kids and your self so do what’s best for all of you.

1 Like

Go to court and get a parenting plan

1 Like

Go to court, do things the legal way, since there are not alot of details, neither of you has legal custody. He can keep them and send them to school where he wants. Quit putting your kids in the middle of your petty drama, get things set in stone legally. Establish stability for them.

The kids go to the public school in their primary district. They should have already switched to the school in your area since that’s where they live.

2 Likes

The kids should go with you since you have them majority of the time makes since

1 Like

He’s just using it as a form of control. He can help fix your car if he wants to keep the kids there

If they stay at same school, you are looking at 45 min commute each way and waking kids up earlier. Only you know your children. If you plan on staying where your parents live, move schools. I’ve been n your exact situation. Thought I’d move back but ended up staying near my family where my support system is. That’s another factor, is ex able to help with children Mon-Fri? Mine works a lot and it’s impossible. So going back to his home town didn’t make sense for me. Remember, get everything set up in court. You don’t have to follow court schedule to a T. You can co-parent and agree to changes but it is IMPORTANT to have the docs in case there is ever a disagreement or things get ugly to fall back on. I’ve seen the best relationships get ugly during divorce and parents being bullied to not go to court. Good luck and prayers to you and your children.

You have them the majority of the time and no car at the moment. Does he want to drive them back and forth every day or buy you a car? If not then the kids go to school where you are and I’m sure any family court judge would agree.

47 Likes

It’s not his decision. You need to go to court and get custody arrangement made. And if you have no car at the moment how would you get them to and from school in another district? Is he going to come get them and take them to and from everyday? If not then they need to go to school where they live.

6 Likes

If you’re the primary care taker and you aren’t living in “our” house then the kids go to school where they live now. That’s a no brainer. If you are trying to work together without family court then either he can help you get a running car, let you live in the house so they can stay in the same school, or let them go to a different school. If you can’t work together then it’s time to go to family court.

24 Likes

Indeed they should go to school where u currently live…if a tike comes where he has the children on a night before school then he should have to drive them to school…
My step daughter stayed here m-f and went to school here now she stays with her mom and comes on the weekend and goes to school.near her mom

Get custody so there won’t be this problem.

If you’re the custodial parent, isn’t it up to you?

I agree with not changing schools if you are not going to stay with your parents permanently,a separation / divorce is enough for them to deal with, but the true is that you are 45 away now with not car , there’s not much that you can do , he can keep the kids during the week and drive them to school and pick them all as well if he doesn’t want them to change school, or he can fix , buy you a car so you can do it .
If none of this work for him , you have the right to switch schools, the court will be on your side on this

1 Like

I know u want them with u more then u care about what school they go to.
I suggest you allow him to do school days unless something unsafe if happening. The courts don’t like changing kids schedules when it comes to school because that can be extremely disruptive to learning. Let him try it out if he can’t handle it you can always move them schools at the end of the semester

You get an a family law attorney and you get a custodial arrangement set up with the courts.

If your primary care giver then yah they go to school in your area.

1 Like

I wouldn’t change their schools unless you plan on living there permanently. Ask him if he can help out more through the week. I would wait to change schools when you find your own apartment/house. If you move out of your parents school district the kids would have go switch districts multiple times.

To be devils advocate here… you are living with your parents, which I assume is not going to be a long term plan for you- why make the kids switch schools when there is no guarantee that is where you will be staying long term. I would leave them in the school they have already been attending until you have your permanent plan figured out. Once you know where you will be staying, then decide whether to switch the kids or maybe you will find a place close to the school they are already going to so they dont have to switch schools. I would not want to take the chance of moving their school to where you are then you find a place and them having to switch schools again. Just my opinion tho.

2 Likes

I wouldn’t change their schools. They’re going through enough already.

First off go to court and get a parenting plan in order. But yes if kids are with you on school days they are zoned for your school

It would be in the best interest of your children to keep some normalcy in their lives & keep them in school with their friends. Why are you not living at home with the kids?

Why didn’t he move out and you stay in the house? Here’s the situation. Your children are having to adjust to leaving their neighborhood and leaving their home while their father has all the leisure of just doing whatever he wants. You should be in the house with the kids and he should leave that way nothing else changes in the kids lives. You do the least amount of damage to your kids that way. I’m sure the judge would see it that way as well.

12 Likes

If they are in your town, mon-fri it makes more sense for them to attend school in your area or he moves out and u take the family home next to the school! 45 mins there and back is ridiculous to travel each day, get them in to a school where they live with u, so they can make friends at the new a school to play with after school and in the holidays, they will see their other friends at the weekend when they visit their dad and it will be all fun with them because no school at weekends! The dad can surly make the trip to you at the weekend to collect and drop off! Dad sounds like he wants an easy life and isn’t thinking about the kids!

Changing a kids school isn’t going to cause to much unsettling, they will get a long lie each morning and instead of 45 mins travelling home they can eat and play straight away! Kids are resilient they bounce back with most situations if handled gently

They should go to school in the district they live in M-F. This gives them access to the bus if you don’t have transportation.
And, you having them 5 days a week makes you the primary caregiver so that puts the decision on school in your court. If you have not gotten an attorney and filed for a divorce already then you should a least get an attorney and file for a temporary parenting plan since there’s already disagreements on things concerning the kids.
If you put them in a school zone 45 minutes away and for any reason can not get them to school on time, picked up on time, or have absences over them not being able to ride the bus that makes you look like an irresponsible parent that can’t handle being the primary caregiver. Don’t do that to yourself unless you want to lose custody because that’s what will happen if you do that.
Time to start thinking like you’re getting a divorce incase you do get a divorce.
Good luck

So here’s the deal. If he wanted the kids to stay in that school, he should vacate the house or come pick up the kids to take them. If you are in an area that you intend to stay then I would switch schools. Otherwise I would say you need to move back into the house or he needs to drive them

My question is why did you move out of your home when you have the children? I wouldn’t change their school but Dad needs to help with transportation and getting your car fixed. Your children need dependable transportation. Maybe you guys can split the cost. I’m sure he has a running car and he has the family home

1 Like

He needs to move and you take the kids home. Now is not the time to continue to accomodate his wants.

2 Likes

He should help transport them to and from school, then.

1 Like

I’m sorry you are going through this. It is seriously great that your parents are able to help. Your kidddos will benefit from this time with their grandparents.

You don’t say how long you’ve been separated or if you’ve both committed to divorce. You don’t say if you are still discussing reconciliation or if you are in counseling together. Regardless, a 45 minute commute each way for you to get the kids to school is a serious hardship. Not only are you driving there but you have to go back unless you have a reason to stay in that other community for the entire day. That’s 3 hours on the road each school day. Will the kids’ dad agree to get you are newer car or repair the car that has broken down as an option to keep this commute going? Since he is going to fight you on a change of schools, you are going to need to get legal help. Is there a low cost legal aid (or pro bono as in free legal) group in your general area? Is there a social worker you are reach out to for help? Not only will you need help getting those kids in school near you but you will also need to get a written agreement on child and spousal support. A writing is best for two reasons: it gives your spouse an idea of the cost of divorce and it gives you a dollar amount you can ‘count’ on to begin to set up a new budget and establish that separate home for your kiddos.

Your kids may be unhappy initially with the change of schools but kids they meet at the park or in the neighborhood may also be attending those new school(s). Keep an eye on them for any socializing or personality changes as family counseling may be something to consider.

Your spouse can always relocate closer to you and the kiddos.

He should help you get safe transportation for the kids , it’s still team work even after a split .

They supposed to go to school closest to them which means transferring and if he tries stopping you then judge would order him to transport kids everyday

He’s jerking you around. He has ONE day to take the kids to school. Consult that lawyer.

Why is it her fault she got custody of kids

Well yeah. The kids should go to school where they live. Why would he want them to drive 2 hours a day to and from school? How is putting them on the road that much good for them.

You should go talk to an attorney. Seriously. Before school starts.

2 Likes

There are church organizations that help fix cars for mothers. Look around your area!

Put them in school where they live now at your Mom’s. If he wanted them to go to school at your house children should be there then! Your decision not his if you have them the most.

Let him take them to school, tf lol

Sounds like if he wants the kids to continue at their same school he should let you have the house that they’re accustomed to and rent a small apartment for himself. He cannot expect the mom to drive three hours a day for the kids schooling

People read what she says he does not live with her and .aybe they don’t own the house where they lived. Enroll the kids in the school where u have them for the scool.week and u need to get in court now!!! And I’m sure the court would agree with you .

1 Like

Get a good Jewish lawyer!

Why he didn’t move and let you stay I cant pay the bills or what is it

You need a lawyer and a legal document that states who the primary parent is and includes all the details like this. We cannot help you at all we don’t even have the area you’re in nor the area the kids residency is in. I doubt you’ve lived at your parent long enough for residency yet. Which means they should attend their old school until there’s a legal paper saying otherwise.

Ask them what they want for school. Maybe the kids need friends to help them through this time.

Talk to your lawyer, if you don’t have one talk to the school principal. of course the children should be going to school from your home!!

The fact that he had you and the kids move clear across town out of their school district….
Trash!!!
You were supposed to stay and he moves out!!
Period!!!

Also go back to the house and kick his ass out. You and the kids should have the house. Get yourself a good lawyer so you can get temporary support and money to make the house payment. Then get yourself a job.

Jessica Brandenburg again not the kids or fathers problem. It is hers where she moved and her car broke down. She has not stated the kids are not safe at the father’s. She wants it changed because she moved and now her car broke down

1 Like

Why are the children displaced? The five of you move out and he stays? No. The kids stay in their home, their school, and he moves out.

Why did you have to move with the children?

Why is he staying in the house and you and the kids staying with your parents?

Well then he can have them all week because driving them 45 minutes to and from school is stupid

1 Like

Ask your lawyer not Facebook.

I fucking hate scumbag boys not even a man

First off it’s not what’s best for you or him. It needs to be what’s the best for the kids. Do what’s easier for your schedule and routine with them since you have them more of the time. I’m assuming there getting ready to go back from summer. If having to change them this would be the best time. Good luck

2 Likes

I left my son in the school where he started so he didn’t have to lose friends as well as his home and family but I had the support of my family who lived in that area also. Even when I bought another house and said this is the forever place while he was growing up, I still took him back to his old home town where he started school for another 10 years. It was hard but it helped him to stay where he had mates.

It’s usually based on the school district the children are in. Based on where they live. Since they with you and your parents the majority of the time, the school district you’re in now is the one they should go to. And a fresh start for them might not be such a bad idea. But you should weigh ALL your options first before finally deciding on what to do. Good luck!

He should have moved out if the kids went with you for the majority of the time. It disrupts the kids so much and with 4 of them that’s ridiculous.

School bus , or if he disagrees, he can transport them.
But why are you and 4 children out of the home, he should be.
Go to court asap

You are mum they with you you make the call

You don’t need permission until you get a court order saying u need his permission. Just switch schools