How to co parent?

Anyone else have a great co parenting situation with their ex? Until they got a jealous girlfriend? A little back story. My ex and I have always been super close friends while we were dating. It was more of a friendship then a romantic relationship. We have a two year old. We broke up right after our daughter was born. We were just better off as friends. Now I am married and in a happy relationship. My ex and I n my husband all could be in the same room together we allow went to my daughters birthday party and some of the guest were surprised we all got along so well. There was never any drama. He would come in the house and visit with the kids. There was never an issue. I know not every co parent relationship is Luke that. Now he has a new girlfriend. He recently told me his girlfriend doesn’t want him to talk to me. Telling him he doesn’t have to talk to me everyday. Telling him he doesn’t have to come in the house either. She is now demanding to be on the phone during drop offs and even asked to be on the visits. How should this be resolved?


At the end of the day you’re the mother of his child and are always going to be around weather she likes r or not.

Why shouldn’t he talk to you every day? I’d expect him to ring every day to talk to his child :woman_shrugging:


What’s her concern with you?Why doesn’t she come along an everone get along.i don’t see why you would talk everday but sounds like she needs to be included is all if he’s serious about her.


Sounds more like your ex’s problem, than yours. She is very insecure and he should get that worked out ASAP. You have a child, you are stuck together forever… Whether she likes it or not.


My advise is stay out of their drama. If he wants her there or on the phone thats on him. You are happy & I assume want to stay that way. Let him deal with her & you keep being a great Mama.


Tell her to get use to it or get gone. Don’t let her ruin a good thing. The child deserves better.


I hate jealous immature women. She sounds like a psycho and he needs to run! I would talk to him about this and say she’s bar shit crazy!

Omg. He needs to be an adult and tell her she can’t make those decisions for him. Its amazing you guys have such a good relationship and as coparents I think its good to foster that. Think about how good that must feel to your child. I mean maybe you could ask to meet her and have a talk or just let her see how innocent the relationship is but ultimately I would never be with someone who tried to sabatoge my coparenting relationship. I think the relationship you describe would be a dream for anyone who has to coparent. She needs to learn to put the child before her own insecurities and if she can’t do that she has no business dating a man with a child from a past relationship…unless shes into deadbeats or something. I could understand if you guys were inappropriate with each other but friendly conversations even daily are normal and healthy. I have trust issues and insecurities as well but I understand the difference between inappropriate behavior and healthy relationships :joy:

Sounds like he will take care of it sooner rather than later

Some people have a hard time dealing with such close ex being so good of friends. My ex husband" kid’s dad" are very good friend’s. He comes and goes to my home anytime. Calls anytime he needs anything or just to talk. Same as I do him. My SO doesn’t have a problem with this. Never has but I know it was a bit odd for him in the beginning. My Ex and myself always made him feel welcome around. Always included him in the talks. They are good friend’s now aswell. Maybe try to understand a bit from her side. Invite her to come as well. Have a cook out or lunch and invite them both. Let her know and see that yall are just friend’s. Also stay out there drama. You can make sure she feels welcome without getting in the drama. Best of luck.

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I’ve been in this situation. My ex took our 2 girls all the time until they started dating. He would take them to his moms to keep them overnight since she didnt want them at her house. Eventually all the visits stopped. They broke up for a few months and he started seeing them again. When they got back together they stopped again. She uses the fact that I would call him when he was supposed to get them and wouldnt. And then I was a gold digger because I filed for child support. We do not have his number and they only see him maybe once or twice a year and that’s only because his mother picks them up for family events (meanwhile he lives about 2 blocks away.) Even then him and his wife do not speak to them. It’s been about 8 years and they dont even call him dad. My husband is their dad and I’m so grateful for him.


Yikes…I would maybe try to invite her over or out somewhere, where you can all hang out. Hopefully they’re in a new relationship and she gets over it. If not, hopefully your ex dumps her, cause if she’s jealous like that, how would she be with your kid? Honestly she needs to grow up, if your husband doesn’t mind the relationship you two have, then she shouldn’t.

Its not her relationship. They have been friends and coparent well. I say continue on as you have. Your relationship is about the kids and ALWAYS will be. She needs to realize this isnt about her.

She is his problem, not yours.

She needs to step off bc there’s no ring. :roll_eyes:
Seriously, everybody needs to have a long grown up talk bc she will either be on board or she needs to find a man with no kids.

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Unfortunately there’s not much you can do. If you happen to catch him alone I’d approach him with concern on how this will effect the safe and relaxed environment you have for your baby

The bitch is obviously delusional :neutral_face:. Ion think you need to do anything lol. It’s your ex’s job to tell her to stay in her place

It’s awesome you guys have a healthy coparenting relationship. Now that he has a gf things will tend to slightly change… I mean, his time is inevitably going to he spent with her some and talking to you on the phone everyday does seem to give the flags of “unresolved” … It should be about his relationship with his kid and time with you needs to be limited. Maybe planning things to invite them both to can ease her mind that your happily married and your all just friends could help. If things intrude on time with his kid then that’s concerning


Don’t help him, take care of what’s yours. Xxx

His new girlfriend must be very insecure.


i would not allow new girlfriend in kids life til at least 6 to 9 months into relationship too many coming and going otherwise imo

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Marisa Javier Sanchez

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She needs to stay her ass out of it. It is none of her business.

Red flags!! She doesn’t care about the child and is very immature. The bio parents getting along like you guys do is great for the child!! It’s not a good sign she is so against it. He needs to understand she is asking him to pull back from his relationship with his child. The child is used to having Daddy there all the time and I think it’s very important. I think what y’all have is great!!! Don’t let this jealous women walk in a try to ruin the amazing life this child has. Talk to her yourself or make dad are what you see.


Speak with her? Maybe reaffirm that you don’t want anything from him for your sake, just for your child, and that the friendship is a great bonus. Let her know that she is more than welcome to attend birthday parties or come inside and chat? If you have a good co-parent relationship, at least make the attempt to have her see it. At least then you can say you tried to be friendly. To me, she seems pretty insecure. She knows he has a kid with you, she should be willing to accept the fact that you already had a friendship established along with you guys co-parenting.

She sounds crazy and possessive. Dont allow your children around her

Girlfriend is jelous , she needs to go. She’s showing you a preview of the future if she’s around…

As the mother and father of the child he has every right to communicate with you. Sounds like dad needs a reality check, and throw that one right back where he found her. I am a step mom to 3 beautiful babies and a we have 1 together, they treat my son just as much as family as the next, his x-wife and I have become very close and I love her dearly. I could not imagine not having a relationship with her. just because this woman he will throw his life in the trash, she needs to learn to respect some boundaries for sure. I never get upset when my husband and his x-wife communicate in my eyes its makes them amazing parents,

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Honestly it’s probably not my place… Maybe not yours either in their relationship because I’m sure you could care less… But as a friend and as a CO parent that might be a potential problem in the future this woman could become overly controlling and she doesn’t want to coparent with you now then once they’re married it will be unbearable. Maybe mention this concern to him and how it would affect your family dynamic over the next few years see what you think it could turn into in the long run. Explain that you and your husband care about him and want him to be happy but maybe he could be happier with somebody else who isnt as controlling or demanding. If you all could see each other getting along in the future (think graduations & milestones like promotions , engagements) then she’ll always be there…

Be open and make it come from a pure place

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Someone is insecure take it as a compliment to you

No, put your foot down & do not allow her jealousy issues ruin a good thing! This is your family, your children, & you sound like things are working out great!
I would personally go to the girlfriend, invite her to dinner (with the whole family) & use that time to discuss why & how your family dynamic works, & tell her you would be very open to her involvement, as long as she brings NO DRAMA to the table.
Tell her you look forward to getting to know her, & maybe acquiring a female friend to pal around with while the guys & kids do their thing.
But do not allow her to disrupt the great life you have mapped out for your kids!