My ex husband and I have been divorced for a few years and he’s put me through hell and back but I still love him he will always have a piece of my heart. He recently started a relationship with someone and it just hurts. How do you cope with this? My anxiety has been so high and it’s heavily effecting me. What are some things I can do to distract myself or get over this?
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Help a mama out and respond anonymously on our forum. https://answers.mamasuncut.com/t/how-to-cope-with-an-ex-moving-on/17486
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Don’t try to go back well myself personally it was a repeat just let him go!
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I am going to highly recommend therapy in this case. There’s a reason that it ended and you need to address it and move on. This is very unhealthy.
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Awww! Hugs to you mama! If he has put you through hell and back, please know that he isn’t worth your love and time. He is now someone else’s hell! Please take yourself out for movies, coffee dates spa days etc and start loving yourself so that you have room just for yourself in your heart.
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Distraction is always key for me. Go out with friends, stay around healthy family members, focus on hobbies.
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If his put you through hell…feel bad for the one who now has him… unfortunately… they’ll go through hell and high water with him as well…
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You need to see a counsellor. This is a legitimate illness. Just can’t remember the name of it. See a counsellor hunxx
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I did a Kanye.
Few years back, I really couldn’t cope and wish I had seeked therapy. I screamed the house down crying when I found out they were having a baby, bunch of recordings sent to him on messenger etc. Toxic asf. Do not be me, seek therapy! Lol
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Yes definitely see a counselor go out with friends treat your self to a spa date or get your nails done if your into that kind of thing
Block them on social media.
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Contact and become friends with our Father in Heaven
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Please don’t go back. I’ve been in your position. Work towards getting over it, go to therapy if needed. But no good will come from going backwards.
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Make that money, honey! Get another job…one that has task goals…it will fill your time and occupy your mind!
Not meaning to add salt to your wound , but I would wish them love, joy ,and happiness you may always care about him but if he loves her thats where he needs to be, once you let him go maybe youll meet your someone special. I understand your broken heart hope and pray it heals soon.
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Remember all the crap he put you through and toughen up and move on. Past is the past and not worth revisiting.
Are you only now having an issue of not being with him because he found someone else…
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See a psychiatrist or psychologist
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I know it’s not going to be easy but focus on getting you back I mean the real you like
Going for a spa with a friend go get your nails done or hair done
Go and feel & look your best
Pamper yourself go out with the girls
Do what it takes for you to go no what I deserve better fuck him
Xx
He got over it, unfortunately you need to too, it’s the only way you will move on!!! Forget about him!!!
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He put you through hell and back
Stop wasting energy on him and what he’s doing
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Focus on yourself, not him. Learn to love yourself unconditionally, build your confidence, due something for yourself that makes you feel good. Replace the love you have for him with love for yourself.
Also (not saying you are but) don’t jump into a relationship until you’re over him and happy with yourself. If you do it’ll (most likely) fail because you want the ex and a new guy is not the ex so you won’t appreciate him for who he is but rather be annoyed because of who he isn’t.
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So I spent 20years in a TOXIC hellacious relationship! He constantly cheated lied made me feel like it was all my fault. He ruined my life literally had me apologizing for him cheating and leaving had me holding a gun to my head questioning my very existence. That is NOT LOVE it is obsession it is narcissistic it is UNHEALTHY. I still tell my self I deserve it when something bad happens I still tell myself im unlovable that im not worthy but that is what I let him to do me for 20 years. Last year in February he told me I DONT LOVE YOU I DONT WANT YOU KICK ROCKS (pretty much) So I took a leap of faith I hopped on a few dating sites I met a few people (I needed to know that someone could still want me, that I wasnt a total disgusting mess like he made me believe) I ended up meeting a man on fb (i did meet a few but this one was different I cant explain it it was just a feeling my guts had) we talked back and forth for a couple days and then around 1am he invited me over we are both adults I knew what I was getting into. I battled with myself for a few mins and said fuck it! I threw caution to the wind I took a leap of faith I LITERALLY JUMPED INTO A MANS BED and guess what almost 1 year later we are still together. He loves my kids and me we are building a life that I never would have knew existed if I would have stayed stuck. If i would have let his control over me win. Even after I did what he asked and moved on he still tried to control me get in my head he said my bf would get sick of me and leave just like he did (that fucked me up I still replay that in my mind) moral of this story DONT TAKE YOUR OLD BAGAGE WITH YOU ON NEW FLIGHTS! DONT LET HIM CONTROL YOUR FEELINGS AND ACTIONS. LET ALL OF YOUR EMOTIONS IN LET IT HURT AND IT WILL FUCKING HURT SO BAD but that’s ok when you’re all done hurting let it all go. Its in the past and remember you dont live there anymore. Look forward not backward. I am the last person on the planet to ever give healthy relationship advice but I do know a thing or two about being broken and defeated. Just know when you cant take anymore your head will tell you. I can now look at my ex and not feel a thing 20years and nothing I dont wish him ill will but I wont run and help me if anything goes wrong either. Just know your not alone and god I hope my situation can help because through 20 years and hundreds of crying spells i was never ready to walk on my own until he made me! Know one could say anyhing to me until He forced me. Falling down hurts like a son of a Bitch nobody wants to accept defeat but I promise when YOU ARE READY YOUR COME UP WILL BE FUCKING EPIC! message me if you need anything
Find a hobby. Plant some plants. Paint. Exercise. DIY crafts on Pinterest. Read a book.
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Feel every bit of the pain. There’s no way around it you have to go through it. It will be hard in the beginning and as time goes by it won’t hurt as bad. Use this opportunity for a journey of self care. Take care of you. Do the things you’ve always wanted to do. It may not look like it now but what you’re about to go thru is worth the hurt. Healing can hurt like hell. Be easy on yourself. When you master the art of self love, you will find the love you’re looking for…or it will find you:blush:. Nothing happens overnight. Progress is a process. Best of luck to you 
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Get into therapy so you can let go, move on yourself and focus on being good coparents.
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For me sometimes the best way to get over one is to get the next one…
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It just takes time honestly. My ex husband and I divorced 20 years ago. It was a joint decision to split and no one else was involved. After being married for 15 years though I still cared very deeply for him. I found it very difficult when he eventually got with someone else. It hurt very badly. But time is a healer. In time you will probably move on to new relationships and new things. I still have a fondness for my ex husband as we shared many great things but I have zero interest in his love life. Focus on your life and making it the best life you can x
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Do you think he will be any different after a while with this new person
Thank god you got out
Move on and be thankful
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Therapy. Friends. Time. A new hobby. And for the love of all that is holy do yourself a favor and do NOT check in on his social media. It’s tough. Let yourself feel your feelings but also remind yourself that it won’t always be this bad.
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The best way to get over a man is to get under one - sex and the city
Soooo sorry for you. 
Never scratch old scars…
Let him go and let him make himself a new life…
Concentrate on yourself and grab your freedom with both hands… You may just have had the closure you need to let your spirit fly… Think of it as a blessing… I did and I’m happier now then I have ever been…
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When my ex did that I messaged him told him that I was happy for him then blocked everyone he knew and him then I turned to a girls night out and then the next day started an all about me life change deal and it took 2 weeks to get over him fully but I kept reminding myself he did me wrong and I am worth more then his lowness
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This book helped me a lot. It’s pricy but worth every penny
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It’s going to take time, but you have to look at it this way. He’s moved on and so should you. Your letting him win by being miserable that he’s moved on. Do things for yourself, get your mind off of him, go out, make new memories with other people.
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You have to feel the pain to move on
But focus on yourself do things that make you happy. It’s hard but try not focus on him see that as your closure he’s moved on
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l get paid over $120 per hour working from home. l never thought I’d be able to do it but my buddy makes over $17460 a month doing this and she convinced me to try. The possibility with this is endless.
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By remembering ex for a reason, or reasons.
Convince yourself he was NOT the right one.
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Remind yourself of why he is an ex and remind yourself of why you’re better off without him. This is normal to feel this way. It’s part of the moving on process. Learn to love yourself and focus on you and you will do great!
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Unfortunately you just gotta feel it out. I would see if you can go on some anxiety meds because it’s likely going to affect you for awhile and maybe some counselling if you can.
l get paid over $120 per hour working from home. l never thought I’d be able to do it but my buddy makes over $17460 a month doing this and she convinced me to try. The possibility with this is endless.
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Let go, by gones be bygones
I’ve been there and completely understand. It isn’t as simple as just “moving on” and I’m sure she knows the “reason” why their marriage ended.
For me, I did three years of therapy starting 1/week, then 1/every two weeks, and finally to “graduating” out.
It does bring up the good times when seeing him be that nice version of himself to someone else, but you have to remember who he really is, what caused the demise, if he was unwilling to be what you needed him to be, and how it made you feel in those moments. You will feel always feel some type of hurt. I’m 12 years into my divorce and it does get to me, but he is still the same person that I chose to leave. Not the person I thought I fell in love with. As time goes on, it does get better.
Sending good vibes your way and you are definitely in my thoughts.
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You are thinking of the good times. But there is a reason you divorced, remember those. Time to focus on yourself and make a good life for yourself.
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You’re going to have to be very real with yourself about the emotions you’re feeling and why. You’re going to have to find a way that works for you to get it all out so you can heal and move on. I used a journal get my thoughts and feelings out. It made a big difference, especially since I have no doubt that after a few days of dumping on my friends and family they got tired of hearing the same thing. In the beginning I just wrote whatever I felt in that moment. But over time I included the reasons our relationship failed. The things I didn’t like about our relationship, the reasons for the scars I still carry, and the things I shouldn’t have tolerated and why. It’s easy to focus on the good, the hardest part is looking at the bad. When I got through the worst of it I focused on the things I want in my relationships going forward, both from a partner and from myself. What I won’t tolerate again and what I need to fix in myself to get it. I have learned through this process that in order to grow I have to stop looking through rose colored glasses, be honest and real with myself always, and take accountability for my choices, and speak up when I’m not ok with something. I don’t carry around so much hurt now. Good luck!!!
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Love yourself most of all. Put yourself first and stop giving your power away to a man. Live life. You only have one so stop wasting it on the past. When you are thinking about him stop and ask yourself why aren’t you thinking about you and what you could be doing right at that moment besides wasting your mind on him. That will stop the reason your anxiety is up.
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Remind yourself WHY he is an ex. Remind yourself of why the marriage/relationship ended.
If you ended it, think of all the reasons you ended it.
If he ended it, remind yourself why/how he ended it.
This doesn’t make it all better, it still takes time, but reminding yourself will sometimes help make it easier.
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l get paid over $120 per hour working from home. l never thought I’d be able to do it but my buddy makes over $18355 a month doing this and she convinced me to try. The possibility with this is endless.
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Focus on you! Make yourself a priority. Fall in love with who you are! You will discover this is just a bump in the road and you will be so glad that you chose you!
Mourn his loss. A covet, like marriage, is supposed to be for life. It’s going to hurt. Very sorry.
Honey you need to be more honest with your self you divorced him you didn’t just marry him .you need to move on no matter how bad it hurts .go buy your selfeva new out fit get your hair done and go out for a night with the ladys somewhere ok
l get paid over $120 per hour working from home. l never thought I’d be able to do it but my buddy makes over $18355 a month doing this and she convinced me to try. The possibility with this is endless.
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Find your own relationship to focus on and move on already
Girl he put you through hell focus on that. Focus on why he is your x. Breaking up with someone is hard even if the person did you wrong but you need to find who you are and what makes you happy take time and build yourself up even talk to a therapist if you need to there’s no shame in it and find things to help you cope
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Love him enough to let him go. Loving someone is wanting them happy.
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Power of positive vibes, be happy for him and happy for yourself, look out of the windshield not the rearview mirror
First, stop following him on everything so you don’t know what he’s doing in his personal life. Second, get a good therapist.
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Thank whatever u believe in and just move on. It’s all u can do.
Remember all the bad things he put you through. Believe you deserve better! Find your worth. Self love; do things for YOU.
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l get paid over $110 per hour working from home. l never thought I’d be able to do it but my buddy makes over $16247 a month doing this and she convinced me to try. The possibility with this is endless.
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Cut loose of all the reminders and stay away from his social media etc. Take a long look in the mirror and tell yourself you deserve to be happy. You can either be a victim of divorce or a survivor of divorce. Survivors hold their heads up and move on to happiness…victims crash and burn. Turn the chapter 
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Go out and get ya some
Find out what makes you happy - not another person. You have to learn to be happy on your own.
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Let him go, baby.
Only way you will get yourself back.
There’s no distractions that will work long term. Therapy with a trauma informed therapist is a must, being trauma bonded to someone ( which we often confuse as “being in love”) is going to take a lot of work in yourself to break that trauma bond. So easy way around it (been there, done that) I can say that eventually it won’t hurt this badly. Hugs.
(((((((Hugs)))))) maybe start looking to try to move on too.
Focus on you and don’t worry about what he’s doing. Please don’t get into another relationship if you’re still this hurt. Just learn to love yourself and focus on you.
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l get paid over $110 per hour working from home. l never thought I’d be able to do it but my buddy makes over $12954 a month doing this and she convinced me to try. The possibility with this is endless.
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Remember all the hell he put you through… he’s doing the exact same to others. But, probably worse tbh.
Discover something you enjoy doing. Concentrate on yourself and your happiness. Or get a punching bag 
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Like the song… Let it Go… Let it Go… Let it Go
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l get paid over $110 per hour working from home. l never thought I’d be able to do it but my buddy makes over $16761 a month doing this and she convinced me to try. The possibility with this is endless.
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Yeah, it sucks, but you are ex’s for a reason and maybe you should focus on your own self healing and move on yourself. I know it sounds a little harsh, but overall, what other choice do you have? Stand outside his window, holding a boombox over your head blasting Nsync’s I Want You Back? Come on girl, take a deep breath, maybe join in a few yoga classes, get your chakra’s right and just live your life. Maybe you’ll meet someone maybe you don’t; but you need to close the chapter on you and your ex. It’s still in the same book, but you have to move on to the next chapter or you’ll never finish your story.
What you are missing is the man he might have been, not the man he is. Choose reality and accept that it would never work out between the two of you, even if he came back. Think about the qualities you are looking for in a partner and don’t settle til you find them.
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You can get a membership at a gym and get your mind off of it. It would be very healthy to do for you and you’d feel a lot better. You’ll move on eventually, it isn’t easy but you will do it.
Maybe try therapy. Seems your having a super hard time getting over your ex.
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l get paid over $110 per hour working from home. l never thought I’d be able to do it but my buddy makes over $13419 a month doing this and she convinced me to try. The possibility with this is endless.
Details HERE…https://Dollarground94.surge.sh
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I’d suggest some mental health help. Maybe counseling or medication for anxiety. Find something new to do. Go to the gym and work on your physical health or take up a painting class to help you relax. Something
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Just focus on your life not his 
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i put away all of my ex husbands pictures, letters, gave his clothes to the homeless and focused all of the love i had for him on our daughter. i initiated the divorce, for many reasons, but not loving him wasn’t 1 of those reasons, i would suggest that you join some groups, get out & get involved, i spent the rest of my young years working & raising my daughter, she was my whole world, & i didn’t get out, make friends or date & now im old, she moved to another city & im alone. don’t do that to yourself, i mean put your kids first, but stay active & social
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It’s hard . Give it time. Time will
Heal your broken heart ❤️🩹
Pray to God for his help.
Therapy. ASAP. This is not healthy behavior. A counselor will help you feel, better, do better and be better. 
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Have you tried therapy? It helps a lot. It doesn’t sound too healthy to be knowing his life if yall don’t have kids or nothing tying yall together still
Let it go. Also remember this, he has moved on and he isn’t paying rent to keep space in your head. Do not let one person in this big wide world define how you feel. Pick yourself up. Join a Yoga or Palates class. Keep yourself busy. Take a trip. Start making new memories to replace the old ones.
You have to learn to love yourself and move on….go on dates or out with friends ….cut off all communication with him except texting about the kids if you have any together and limit this too.