I have a really bad anxiety disorder, i am on medication but its still bad. I have 3 kids who i have myself almost constantly, my fiance works so much hes hardly home and when he is he is sleeping. I stay at home with the kids and do school online. We live in a very tiny 2 bedroom apartment and it always looks cluttered no matter what i do. Today the property manager banged on my door and threatened to evict me saying that i was disgusting and that there is no excuse for my apartment not to always be clean because i dont work. Im a quiet person so i just said ok im sorry, ive since been cleaning all day in between my panic attacks and i cannot stop shaking. I feel utterly useless.
Look on Pinterest for maybe organizing tips. And just take a breathe. Getting all worked up isnāt good for you or your family
Oh my god Iām so sorry. What a terrible property manager. Home with 3 kids gives you no time to clean even if you werenāt going to school and struggling with anxiety.
Look for another placeā¦ 3 bedrooms, more space for you and the kids. You need the extra space and you certainly dont need the unhealthy input from that landlord. Good luckš
If youāre having attacks, sit down, sip water, and focus on things that you love. Favorite items such as a book, food, a smell.
Iām sorry that is terrible he had no right to say that and as a sahm myself and I have terrible panic attacks I know all to well what itās like take a breath and try to relax getting all worked up wonāt help and I know that is easier said then done but try you can do it, you got this tell the property manager to mind his own business and maybe check out some websites on how to organize small spaces. Good luck.
Donāt be some people are just mean take a deep breathe I understand because in like that
Thereās a difference between messy because u have kids or filthy. Is it cludder or is it filthy
Youāre not alone x I have rly bad anxiety I go see my doctor even when I donāt want to. Take meds when necessary and keep my environment safe. Call up any friends you have to help you declutter. It wonāt be as overwhelming if someone is helping. I know Iād do that for a friend.
As a mom my house is only clean if my kiddo is sleeping or gone lol if you need someone to talk to please reach out. I struggle with anxiety and depression and panic attacks are my worst enemy. It is always good to have a friend to talk to
Maybe he should upgrade your home so u have more space, how does he even think its acceptable for a family of 5 to live in a 2bed house? He sounds disgusting!
I have no advice. Iām a SAHM to two and Iāve had crippling anxiety since I can remember. So did/does my mom. I need to get on something but I took Zoloft for less than a year before I had kids and it made me gain sooo much weight in a short amount of time so I quit. I wish I could find an anxiety medication other than Zoloft.
i feel you. i also have anxiety and depression on top of other issues like a bad hip and backā¦i have 2 kids and they have so many toys but it gets out of control. I seem to always have a mess because i dont know where to put things.
im sorry you are goingvthrough this
Take a deep breath and breathe.
Just know everything always works out.
First things first.
What are some solutions to this problem?
Is there a way you can put kids into daycare?
If not what are some ways they can have a daycare theme at home?
Can they entertain themselves when you are busy?
Can you prep food or plan meals?
You sound very busy and I am sure you are.
But I know youāll figure this out.
I hope the tips I mentioned can help you.
I donāt care how hard to try to keep a place clean with any children itās almost impossible
Make sure everything is sanitary. W anxiety its hard to get motivated but its required. Little by little itāll get done but u need to make urself do it.
Thatās not true . I had three kids & suffered from anxiety & never had a dirty , messy house . See if you can limit the number of toys they have out . Teach them to put them back when they are done . Even little kids can bring their dishes & spoon to the counter when their done eating . If the kids have too many toys , give some to charity . Just declutter. House work will take your mind off stress , & anxiety
There are outside agencies that may help. If your religious, ask your church. Social workers can help. Your pediatrician may help. Obviously you appreciate if you need to find out something, ask for help. I can tell because you online school. Please, there are soooooo many resources. This effects you AND your children. You may text me back. I had 3 girls in 4 years, all c-sections. We werenāt rich. It was hard. my friend used to say, ābuild a bridge, and get over it!ā Get to that bridge building!
My kitchen was completely clean last night and I just got home from work and still need to make dinner, donāt feel bad about LIVING on your home and maybe itās time to start looking for somewhere else to live I know it can seem like a lot but if you guys have a stable employment record look into buying a home we were paying 1200 for rent in a 3 bdrm home and are now buying our house for 900 js
Can you move to a bigger place? We are also a family of 5 but in a 3 bed 2 bath now. Itās a lot easier to keep clean when youāre not crammed into a tiny space.
I have bad anxiety, like panic attacks every day, hardly leave my house, have to mentally prepare when I do kind of anxiety, and I also have depression. Iām a mom of 2, I work on the weekends but Iām mostly a sahm. We leave in a 2 bedroom duplex, and Iām sorry but adding one more kids wouldnt cause my house to be cluttered. Itās hard, I know. Itās hard being a mom, itās even harder being a mom who is the priority caregiver, and does this all the time. It wears you down and at some point you just dont even know who you are as a person. But, your children dont deserve to see their mom like this and they dont deserve a home that isnt liveable. Iāve only rented homes, never bought. In the years Iāve rented Iāve never had my landlord come to my home and say itās disgusting, and I doubt they would over clutter anyway. If you do have a lot of stuff, then itās time to start going through it. You need to discard anything that isnt essential, ESPECIALLY because you are 5 people living somewhere meant for 2-3. You can donate whatever, but honestly (and Iām very environmentally conscious but sometimes you just gotta do what you have to) if its just gonna sit in bags because you never go to a donation place then just throw it all away. Iām sorry you are struggling, itās hard! But just remember the more you do for yourself, the more you improve for you and your kids, the better you start to feel.
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Karenš
Can you add:
It is not filthy by any means, weāve had cps here for an unrelated incident and they always compliment us on how we are doing. There is always food, and the clutter is the dirty clothes and toys, its expensive doing laundry here and i have no where else i can go. The closest laundrymat is almost 30 miles away.
One room at a time from one corner to the other top to bottom make children help and also Hubby shoul help on days off and for that f****** manager to tell you that must not have children because being a housewife with children is a job in itself 24/7
Please go see a doctor n get your anxiety managed. I have suffered from the same my whole life. Come to find out it is bad for your heart n causes all sorts of health problemsā¦ best of luck to you.
They canāt come over unannounced
Clutter can cause you extra anxiety and stress and maybe your boyfriend is not helping enough because he is overwhelmed with the amount there is to do. Finding a bigger place and getting rid of stuff will feel like a weight lifted off your shoulders. Start fresh and teach your kids to clean up after themselves itās a learning process with kids. Youāll figure out a better routine and organization makes your life so much easier on the daily. Donāt sweat it
Too much. Nobody is perfect.
You need professional help with your home as well as with your children. Why are you home schooling? If the children were enrolled in a regular school that might give you personal time and time to clean the house. Perhaps you can organize and structure yourself in order to keep the house clean. Also start training your children to start cleaning and helping you with house chores. Theyāre are never too young to start learning how clean up after themselves.