Fan question
I need some advice. My mother in law has always been the type to tell us how to parent our kids (even in front of them). I usually don’t make a big deal of it. I just see it as her trying to give us advice that she could have used when she was raising my husband and his brother. Well today really hurt my feelings. All of my kids (5, 3 and almost 2) really enjoy Halloween and all things spooky. We don’t go overboard with anything scary. But when it comes to scary movies, unless it’s got something inappropriate, we’ll put it on the evenings before bed and watch it while they play. We never just put it on for them to watch. Well, my three year old has been becoming more aggressive. He hits his brother and sister constantly and never really listens to us (which I chalk that part up to being a 3 year old). Today while my mother in law was at our house, my 3 year old hit his brother so my husband gave him the option to apologize or go to time out. When he refused to say sorry, we put him in the corner. My mother in law jumped up and started telling my husband and I what to do and then said he’s only violent because of the scary movies we make him watch. We informed her we only watch scary movies occasionally (if I’m being honest, we barely watch TV at all) and when we do, he’s never paying attention. At least not close attention. She then blamed our “obsession” Of Halloween. I told her we get into it, but nothing that isn’t age appropriate. So then she said it’s because when he does watch TV, I let him watch power Rangers 🤦♀ Now like I said, I usually let things go, but it felt like she was just fishing for something to call us bad parents for. Is there a way to talk to her about this without sounding like I’m being mean? Part of me feels like she’s genuinely concerned when she has no reason to be, and another part of me feels like she’s trying to pick a fight and make our kids feel like what she says goes above what we as their parents say.
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Just let it go lol mother in laws like to insert their opinions all the time. Tell her in your home her opinion isn’t needed unless asked for and leave it at that. Don’t sweat the small stuff
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I had to tell my mother to let me raise my child when she kept stepping on my toes. You are the mother and you have every right to raise them how you want to raise them, if you want them to watch tv then that’s your prerogative. Next time she does it, simply ask if her mother constantly told her how to raise your husband. If yes ask how it made her feel, if no then tell her to follow that example.
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There’s honestly no way. You put your foot down and that’s that. That’s the only way, if something isn’t done now. It’ll keep coming up til you or your husband blow up then it’s something different.
Stand your ground. Your kids your decisions.
Man I don’t miss those days lol I had to tell mine that she raised her kids now let us raise ours… it can also be confusing or used against the parents if let go to long 
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It’s what 3 year olds do. They go through phases and one of them is hitting or hurting someone.
You’re doing the right thing by giving him the option to apologise or go to time out.
Horror movies do not make people aggressive. Just like video games.
Do not worry about sounding mean, tell her straight. Let you be the parent and don’t let her control you! Being harsh and mean gets the point across. Just like time out. It’ll eventually get the point across to your son about hurting people.
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My mom swears power rangers made my brother aggressive. Once she took it away he calmed down. Who knows tho…
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You need to put her in her place. I went through this and it’s terrible. Do it now because believe me it will get worse.
Personal experience of being a horror buff and Halloween addict… My kids are currently 9, 7, 3, 2 and all watch horror movies… Probably what most would say inappropriate for their age because of the gore but they love scary films! My 3 year old begs for scary movies, they play zombies and bloody Mary and pretend our house is haunted lol… Sometimes they get scared and ask to sleep with me lol, but still ask to watch something spooky! They are all girls but none are violent. I do not believe this stuff makes a kid violent either. And honestly boys are typically more aggressive. As far as your MIL, she sounds like a typical MIL lol. Don’t take it personal and if you don’t want to hear any of her drama tell her to be quiet… Your home, your children. She was probably just all mad bc she got hit and got no apology! 
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Should maybe pull back on her visits a little
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I recommend you do what she’s doing. Speak your mind. Only difference, there is a problem with the way she’s acting. Honestly, if she can’t apologize and refrain from this behavior then she needs to go in to time out until she can follow your rules.
Just have your Husband speak up and say “thanks, Mom. We’ve got it covered.” If he won’t, just say “thanks, I’ve got this” or “hey, while I’m putting him in timeout, could you get Joey some more juice, please? I think he’s out.”
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Just tell her to shut up…they’re YOUR kids …not hers. If you don’t want to say anything yourself have hubby say something…
No one interfered with my parenting.
I have some issues with my husbands family… so if you take any advice from me do so with caution lol… but I would tell her movies and shows don’t cause kids to be violent. It’s not Disciplining then that makes them think it’s okay. And if she has an issue with how you guys decide to parent she can learn to keep it to herself or she knows where the door is.
To be honest I’m a new mom but I have been married awhile now and I have a very opinionated and at times ver hard head mother in law at times I love those qualities of hers because I’m the same however early on in my marriage to my husband I learned I needed to set boundaries with her and makes certain things clear with what I would and wouldn’t tolerate and the same when I found out I was pregnant we’ve made it very clear that we understood our parents ment well however we were raising our children how we wanted to and if we needed or wanted advice we’d ask for it. For the most part they have respect our wishes. So far it’s worked. When ever theres a slip up thought depending on whos parent it is we remind our own parents of our wishes.
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Don’t think that he isn’t paying attention to those movies. He is and it’s always at the worst time too. They use to say the same thing about my brother until he stabbed my sister in the forehead with a fork. Said he is chunky now. While the movie child’s play was playing in the background. He was about 3 when that happened. Power rangers my brother use to mimic those moves on us all the time. It hurts. Kids do mimic what they see on tv even if it just a couple glimpses here and there.
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You and your husband need to put her in her place!! My mother tried that shit with me when my son was born. I told her very nicely to fuck off and she needs to respect my husband and I or she can kick rocks. I didnt mean it, but it worked. She backed off, let me do my thing with my children.
Tv does not make a kid aggressive 
she sounds like a whack job. Tell her you appreciate her advice but that you’ll raise your kids how YOU want, and I’d she doesn’t like it, she can stay home 
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Her son should take care of this in a loving way but…butt out Mom! It really isn’t any of her business.
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Tell her if she’s got to talk down to yall in front of the kids not to come over. Its yall house - yalls kids & as long as they’re not in any real danger its none of her bussinss. She could talk- give advice or her opinion with out putting the way yall do it down in front of the kids.
She’s a control freak. Just tell her this is MY home & thesa are MY children & altho you appreciate her concern etc etc. Try not to get your husband too involved as it may cause unnecessary tension. Been there. And if she can’t take a hint, get a little more forceful with her.
My ex MIL did similar things. I didnt say much at the time but it always simmered inside of me. You need to get your hub to speak with her.
Maybe you can tell her thank you but that doesn’t concern her. Also, don’t have her around as much if she always has something to say. I put a stop to any comments from my mother because I know she just wants to get to me. Avoiding her helps a lot.
hell no girl I’d tell her to f off! I cant stand grandparents like that! limit her time with them from now on and she’ll regret it trust me.
You are their mother don’t let anyone tell you how to parent! That is so disrespectful. If you haven’t figured out how to prevent fighting in your home you will. It’s all trial and error. Time out is always a good option in my opinion and maybe try to cut out the aggressive shows and see if it makes a difference. Stand your ground mama! Those are your babies !
It may or may not be the TV. Studies have proven that TV violence raises the risk of aggressive behaviour (I will post links for those that don’t agree). You might think that your 3 year old isn’t paying attention but at that age they are a sponge. That being said, he’s your child and if you want him to watch horror shows, that is your choice. She’s allowed an opinion, but you are also allowed to tell her it’s not warranted.
https://pediatrics.aappublications.org/content/124/5/1495
https://jamanetwork.com/journals/jamapediatrics/fullarticle/382349
I would jus approach it as kind as possible addressing the issue and expressing how u feel about it all including how she approaches u in front of the children which she should never do.
You may not think they are watching intently but if they can hear it even it’s not a good influence on them. I’m not saying that’s the reason they are violent just that it might be a contributing factor. However it’s obvious that you do t let the behaviour go unchecked so for your mil to start telling you how to parent is just crazy.
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Tell her back off and if she can’t respect you and your parenting…leave. My mother in law tried it and got shut all the way down. It’s not disrespectful to stand your ground.
