sorry ahead of time for the long post…but I was wondering how other moms dealt with stress? Before having my daughter I dealt with stress by going for a run or going to the gym. afterwards I felt so much better and had much better days. my husband is aware of this much needed outlet and always supported me having a few hrs of “me” time a few times a week. well…my husband just took a job that will be taking him out of the state for several months at a time and just recently was gone for about 5 weeks. it’s the first time I’ve parented alone essentially and feel terrible guilt leaving her to do anything for myself…mind u, I work on an “as needed” basis so maybe once or twice a month so I’m with her 95% of the time which I LOVE but there are times I just need a bit of time to blow off steam and recharge. several of my friends recommended a class/program called parents morning out. it’s m-f from 830-1230…I can take her 1 hr, 1 day a week or every day for the whole 4 hrs. after speaking to MANY people about it and those that have actually used the same place, i was thinking about tues and thurs for maybe 2 or 3 hrs. they do crafts, music and story time, recess, snack time and free play. i thought it might be great for her and me. now…I explained all this to a family member and the response I got was “nothing should be more important than being at home with my daughter” and “she’s going to be abused and get sick”. here I thought it would be good for her to be around children her age (I’m a one and done momma), learn fine motor skills and sharing and what not, it is only a few hrs a week and I can recharge and be less impatient and overwhelmed at times and she gets a happier momma. I feel guilty all over again. what do I do? any opinions or advice?
You need to take care of yourself so you can take care of her. A little time to recharge will be good for both of you
You know yourself and what you need. Don’t let anyone else make you feel guilty about needing to recharge. All mommas need that time! It is a great idea to let her be with other children and learn new things for a few hours a week. She needs interaction with children her age.
Take care of you!! A little separation will be good for both of you!! I’m a WAHM and I so appreciate the times where my kids are in someone else’s care so I can just do my own thing for a bit!!
Do it. As a mom of 6 i can tell you You need your alone time. There’s nothing wrong with a few hours away from her a week. It’s not like you’re dumping her to go party every night or anything. She also needs to learn to be away from you as well.
If you have checked everything out and feel it is a safe place for her to be, bring her! There is nothing wrong with needing some time to recharge! Especially being the sole provider while your husband is gone for work. Do not let that person make you feel guilty! Enjoy the few hours you very much so deserve!
Honey u need u time especially since hes away working. Ur family member sounds like an asshole tbh. Plus itll be good for ur daughter. She can make new friends and play with other kids. U need to take care of urself first so u can take care of ur family. And it’s not like ur out drinking and clubbing. Ur working out or running errand by urself.
You have to take care of you to take care of everything else. There is nothing wrong with needing me time
Nothing wrong with putting in head phones and running with her in the stroller
You need to take care of yourself. My daughter is 3 and had been in day care since she was 4 months old. She had never been abused or neglected. She has benefited a lot from being around other kids
Self care is the best way you can be the best you and best mama…just because you have kids doesn’t mean you don’t deserve “me” time…I’d say go for it! If people you trust trust this program then I’d give it a try…good way to have her interact with other kids
i am going through the same thing…except i have 3! with our oldest she had no choice but to be in daycare bc i was still in high school then college and work. with our youngest 2 i have been home with them (they are 2 and 4 months) i worked nights so they could be with family and still be with me during the day since their dad’s work fluctuates. now after 2 years i am wore down and i am considering puttting them in daycare which breaks my heart and worries me. but i have got to get back to work and do something that makes me feel like me again! i am torn bc i am so scared about them being mistreated or of course exposing them to germs. with my 2 yr old i know it will do her good to be around other kids but i hate it for our baby! i am with you mama! i hope some comments on here help guide both of us and give us peace about our decision.
Do it ! She will probably love it more than you
I’m pregnant with baby number 6 I go to the gym and put my boy in the creche there. That works for me while everyone else is at school.
You are talking about a few hours a week not all day every day.
Go for it! You cant expect to be sane all the time, you end up snapping. And its great for them! Friendships start by getting out of the house. And so what if your kiddo gets sick, let her/him they will eventually and you cant avoid it. Better to start building that immune system early then wait till its too late and even worse.
I think that is a wonderful idea. I had a mil that felt every minute should be spent with my girls. I got the same thing from my then husband. I loved my girls but you time is very important. I have 3 grown daughters ,2 with children.They are lucky to have a chance to do time for them.Take your daughter one day and observe. I think you both will benefit from moms day out. Good luck
I took my sons for a walk daily, there are great ligjt weight strollers for runners good for all!
Take care of yourself. You need to be your best self for your kiddo. Nothing wrong with it.
Do it. It will benefit you both.
You need to take care of yourself also, as long as you have checked out the place your baby will be staying it won’t hurt her to be away from you for a couple of hours, or maybe your family member would be willing to watch the baby.
Do it. Once mine is old enough, I plan on having a day a week to have a few hrs to recharge or have a date night with my hubby, just cuz I’m not sure how well I will handle the stress of this. I’m an introvert that could have totally been good without kids, so I’m not sure how well I’m going to handle all this “I need mommy 24/7” business lol
i actually take both of my children to something like this on Saturday afternoons they do a lot of things that i wouldn’t have the chance to give them with me being a single mother it also gives me a chance to unwind and do the things that r easier to do on my own like run arrens or pay bills. my 3 yr old son loves going he asks to go every Saturday it has helped a lot with interacting with others as well as his speech among other skills. I would definitely meet the people in charge as well as some of the other moms or parents. Remember to forget what everyone else is telling and go with your gut nothing is going to lead you to being a better parent then following your gut or instincts. your decision and opinions matter more than what anyone can decide for you because at the end of the day you have to live with the decision.
There’s always going to be at least one person who thinks you’re a monster. Your house, your child, your life, your rules.
Me time is also very important for you. You dont want to feel like the weight of the world is on you constantly
Good for u and your baby.
First off their opinion isn’t what should matter. Do what you feel in your heart is best for both you and your child.
Stop listening to every body else and do you boo. Good luck
You can put her in child care part time or join a gym with a day care
You need to do it. The person who told you that was not thinking clearly. If you’re happy, your daughter will be happy. Yes she might get sick being around other kids more but she’ll be fine.
How old is your daughter. Is she old enough to be able to communicate if something were to happen there. If so, give it a shot. Your daughter would be able to hang out with other children and do fun activities. You would get to recharge and get a break. It’s a win win. If you are concerned, maybe ask if you can stay and observe for the first day or two to get to see how your daughter interacts with the other kids and adults.
Part of being a good parent, is recognizing and taking care of your own mental health.