I have an almost three year old who is constantly hitting me and his dad. We have tried everything except spankings to try to get him to stop. We just had a new baby and I don’t know if that is what is making it worse or if there is another issue. I am at a loss of what to do. Please any advice would be helpful. And we have allowed him around the baby but he has smacked him and now I don’t feel safe having them in the same room. And to add to it yes we have done one on one time and nothing has seemed to help.
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Whoop. That. Behind. He will stop. Hit back. He bites- bite back. He will stop very quickly.
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You said it you have tried everything except whooping his ass thats what he needs!!! What you want him to be 5 and still doing the same thing or worse!!! Get too it
i wouldn’t say spanking is the right way to go with this just because then you’re showing it’s okay to hit
“Whoop that ass and they don’t act like that”. 
yes lets hit the child because hitting wrong??
What worked for my niece was I would whip out my phone and tell her “im recording your behavior to show all your friends” and she would stop. Ofcourse I didn’t actually do it but it worked. 
Spank him. It not showing him that it’s okay to hit it shows him that their is consequences to his actions!
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Smack him! There is a massive difference between a small smack to show him that behaviour is bad and taking it to far.
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Your the adult he is the child! Say stop in a commanding voice once if he chooses not to listen then you smack his hand! I don’t tell my children twice I am the parent and if they are using that hand to smack then you smack that hand! When he is older he will learn if you smack someone they will smack back it will teach him to find other ways to release his anger other than to smack!
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Time out & stick to it , have to be stern & strict with it or it won’t work.
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Spank that child’s ass
If you pop him he will learn that hitting hurts. They don’t really understand that hitting causes pain at that age. He doesn’t want to hurt you, he wants attention. Hopefully once he knows it hurts he’ll stop.
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Pop his hand and tell him no in a Stern voice!!
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What’s preventing you from spanking him ? You and his dad should draw the line so he knows who’s the parent and who’s the child. Be strict and firm please
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When I first got with my husband my step daughter hit me and bit me and kicked me. She finally stopped when I looked at her and said ‘Where’s my daughter?’ She looked really confused and I said ‘ My daughter loves me too much to treat me this way’ so I didn’t talk to her until she calmed down, wouldn’t look at her or anything. Our therapist called it a Mommy time out and it worked for her, my son on the other hand has to lay on his bed and finish getting out then we talk. All kids are so different.
My son does have behavior issues that are related to his ADHD. We’ve had issues with him since shortly after he turned two. However, one thing we do is when a kid hits or bites him, whether it be first before he does it to other child or he does it first to that child or does it to an adult, yes, he gets in trouble for making that bad choice, but we also explain (talk to him on his level) to him that him feeling upset and hurt by what the other kid did to him is how he makes them feel too. We do discipline him by grounding him. So, by taking outside time away as well as his favorite activities away for an x amount of time. He hates the consequences, but we explain to him and help him understand why he’s in trouble and why it’s a bad choice. No, it wasn’t perfect to start. It takes so much time and patience. Don’t take away his sibling from him. Give him supervised time. Don’t leave them alone together. Things sadly will happen, but never leave unsupervised.
I heard once “you never solve hitting with hitting.” So I have never spanked my children for hitting. But I do make sure the consequences of hitting are severe. No play dates, no toys, no dessert, no tv. It usually works.
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whoop that ass. and tell them with your Stern voice that it is not okay… it is okay for the parent to whoop a kids ass because they are parent and is not going to teach them its ok to hit… But will teach them who is boss. children need to learn their place that they are the children and parents need to do their job as a parent. an ass whooping is completely different than child abuse for all you tree hugging people that want to scream abuse… Kids now day are out of control because parent’s didn’t want to do their job and be a friend…
What does he watch on tv? Does any one else babysit him? He has learned this some where.
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I reversed the door knob of her bedroom si I could lock her into time-out. Didn’t take TOO long before she realized she had no audience.
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Did you know it days in the Bible spair the rod spoil the child if you allow him to do that he will feel it’s ok ther forr
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Use a wooden spoon to spank him… Then after that… When he acts like that again… All you have to do is point to the spoon and he’ll stop…
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Hitting him back probably won’t solve the issue. Get him checked for disorders, like ADHD or ODD
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Hit him back. That’s how you teach empathy.
“Do you lile me hitting you? No? Then don’t hit.” Worked for me, my cousins and my kids… 
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I’m in the same boat except I’m due in July & am trying to break this before the baby comes. We have attempted the spanking thing (it doesn’t work) it only made it worse for us
Do not pop, swat, smack or spank.
He’s TWO, he will not understand why your hitting him.
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Spanking is definitely not a way to deal with it because your trying to teach him not to hit by hitting. It doesn’t work and thankfully you have not nor does it sound like you would want to. Beyond reacting sadly and telling him owe that hurts me…I think maybe a trip to a doctor to get with a child psychologist may work. There are also free apps for help. I know of dr on Demand is a good one. That one may cost a couple dollars, but I think it’s free…anyway you can talk with a psychologist for free 24/7.
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Consistancy and time outs eventually they get the point .and have them show you gentle hands
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Are there other concerning behaviors that the child is demonstrating besides this? It could be something other than disobedience. If it is add, adhd, or autism this can not be punished are spanked away.
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Please don’t hit that baby. There are other ways of getting them to understand. Like taking fav toys away or TV time and time out or a moment to themselves can work wonders. But hitting a child should never be a parents 1st response to everything a child does.
You need to try spanking
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Give him a pop on the butt, smack him back. My parents did these things and I am fine.
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He is probably jealous of the new baby and that’s how he’s acting out. He doesn’t need to go to the doctor. He needs to know it doesn’t feel good. How do you learn if no one teaches you? Letting him know it’s not okay will not damage him. Taking him to the doctor for something that isn’t necessary is just stupid. He doesn’t need medication, he needs tough love.
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I always grabbed my child’s hands and repeated the phrase " love, soft and gentle touches" and held there hands and gently touched what they had previously hit or smacked.I have four children and this worked with all of them.
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Although you do not feel safe, you have to involve the three year old in everything you do with the baby. Do not leave him unsupervised. He can be your helper.
We told our two year old that the baby was his baby and he had to love and take care of him.
He helped out with diaper changes by getting the stuff ready. He helped me pick out his outfit. He helped get the wash cloth nice and soapy or wet.
If he does something unacceptable, then place him in time out immediately. If he has trouble understanding use simple phrases such as: hitting is no-no. Or whatever you use. Have him count to ten. Then repeat: hitting is no-no. Ask him to be nice to the baby. We had them stroke their arm or face as a sign of being nice or gentle. Then continue to ask him to help you.
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Don’t keeo hin away from the baby. Sounds like having the baby is the problem. Involve him in Everthing. Make him feel wanted and loved still.
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Smack him back and say no. And put him in timeout every time he does it.
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I am a mother of 2 birth children, one adopted child, several foster children, retired teacher and grandmother of 3. You can solve this without spanking by being firm and consistent, such as time-out but it must be done every time it happens. Be aware that non- physical methods take a lot of time and patience. Spanking can work faster if done, consistently and with love. The key is consistency and love. If the child knows EVERY TIME he hits …blah, blah, blah will happen. He will eventually comply. If I learned anything from all my interactions with children it is that rules and consequences can be different for each family and still work well, if done consistently and with love. Often times, I have observed that when discipline is not effective, it is because the parent sometimes punishes the child, next time tells, next time threatens etc. The child is smart enough to know that most of the time they get away with the behavior. Make a rule, set a consequences and do it every time, even if you have to stop the car, get up from dinner, delay leaving the house…whatever. The child has to know if he breaks the rule he will get your consequence.
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Time out every single time he does it. Afterwards have a heart to heart with him at eye level and explain why hitting is not ok and that he will get time out again if he does it again. Do this every time and he will stop.
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You can’t teach a child to not hit by hitting him/her. Have ur oldest involved as much as you can. Don’t leave the 2 babies alone together unattended🤷🏼♀️ it will take a lot more patience but will be worth it. When I had my daughter 7 months ago my son was starting to act the same. I just told him ‘this is your sister baby and she loves you, take care of your baby’. Ever since their inseparable. He helps me bathe her, feed her, gives her the soother. It makes him so happy when he can help, and I alwaays thank him. Every child is different and everyone parents different. But distancing them from each other will not make things better
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Bust that kids ass. Period.
This is going to seem weird, but jot down what is triggering the hitting behaviour. Is he not getting his way, is he feeling jealous of baby or of mom and Dad? Whatever the issue is that is triggering the hitting you need to solve it before you can get him to stop hitting. If the trigger is getting his way, (I.e i I want candy for breakfast) try reframing what you want him to do by giving him control over his choices. E.g You can’t have candy for breakfast, but tell you what, I’m going to let you have something fun too, your choice… do you want peanut butter and apples or do you want Nutella and bananas… sometimes finding out what kids are missing is the key to figuring them out. Remember he is three… and most likely this behavior is a phase. How are you reacting to his hitting you? Is there a punishment? If there isn’t, there should be
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Try a hitting pillow/stuffie, head squeezes where you gently put one hand on forehead and one on the back of head and just apply slight pressure (works to recenter my son when he is frustrated), standing up and walking away- called extinction behavior training, time outs, etc.
I’d whipped his ass after the first time I got hit🤷♀️
My almost 3 yo went thru this not too long ago. I started with fake crying and saying you hurt mommy. Then that didnt work after awhile. What did work is me just walking away while I say, I don’t want to be around you when you hit me because it hurts. He gets it now.
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Ppl are gonna get pist but oh well…I always let them know what it felt like to get bit or hit in the face(yes just a freakin tap but they got the ideal) and hard enuf to leave teeth marks.breaks em real fast when they find out it don’t feel good. 
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Give him a smack back, let him know thats what it feels like when he does it to other people n that if he doesnt like it nobodfy else likes it either… eye for an eye… he will learn i did this with my children my mom did it with me…all are fine
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Well that’s the problem you have not beat that ass don’t worry it’s normal people been doing it for thousands of years it’s just the past ten years that everyone is all about using words and not spankin well go figure
This baby is jealous.this new baby has taken his place .give him lots of love
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It’s not spanking but everytime he hits hold his hand and tap the back of it with a firm “no hitting” and put him in timeout. Be consistent in doing the timeout even if you don’t tap his hand. If he gets out of timeout put him right back. He will scream and cry most likely
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All these people saying hit/bite your kids back 
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Whatever you do and there is good advice here BE .CONSISTANT even when you are tired. Minimum interaction so that he is not getting attention.
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How about letting him help with the baby?
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I know this sounds harsh but I always flicked mine in the head it doesn’t hurt them but the shock and the thunk sound it made made them quit well and I’d make them sit there and be nice for 10 mins with me on the couch
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If my kids hit when they were young, I’d smack them back. They learned really quick not to put their hands on anyone.
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Stop hitting your kids, it’s lazy.
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Find the trigger/source of the hitting. You could whoop him to kingdom come, but until you find and fix the trigger, it isnt gonna help. It sounds like someone is jealous, or it could be an over reaction to being told “no.” Weve started reframing instead of a hard no. (Instead of no to sweets, give an option that is acceptable to you).
When you hit you get hit back. If you dont teach that lesson someone else kid will.
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Not spanking kids is what’s wrong with society knowing your only going to get a good talking to what do you think the kids going to do but let the kid know it’s going to get its ass whooped and see the difference
if you teach him not to smack by smacking them back then you wont have to deal with it later. You let them get away with it they will be smacking, then hitting, then punching people all of their lives… notice that I said smack and not hit…there is a big difference
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My almost 17 yo started this when he was 3. Nothing really stopped it but he was time out a lot! He calmed down on the violence around 4, but was a mouthy booger until he was a good 10-11. Once he hit puberty he turned into an awesome kiddo. I have so much fun with him now. Very easy. Like he got his teenager years out of the way early. My youngest was an angel until like 13, now he’s 14.5 and is incredibly difficult. Getting trouble at school and home, at friends houses. I’d take the hard kid at an early age over a hard teen any day!
My sister in law just had a baby a couple months ago and my son absolutely adores him! So I’m no help with the younger sibling. However, my son tends to hit his father and I as well. If a smack on the butt doesn’t help I resort to smacking him on the hand. IF that doesn’t work, I slap him where he slaps or hits me. Etc if he hits me in the face I lightly will smack him in the same area. I don’t smack him hard enough to hurt him, but it does catch his attention and he’s learned that hitting people isn’t nice and he apologizes right after🤷 it’s worked and he rarely hits us now unless he’s extremely frustrated. Oh! Also my son is 2 years old getting ready to turn 3 in June. Just constantly remind him that the baby loves him and keep him involved whether it be getting a blanket or picking out an outfit! It’ll make him feel important.
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Spankin… just enough to hurt the feel goods
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Play therapy works wonders with a therapist
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When hits take his hand put in your palm. and let him know you love him and you need his help on taking care of the baby since he is such a big boy. Maybe get him to make a toy or take him shopping for a baby gift and a gift for him
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My brother smacked me when I was a newborn lol he is jealous but will grow out of it eventually
What the hell ever next thing you no he will be chocking the baby you need to get his attention smack him back could be why no one likes your kid
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He is probably very jealous. Give him lots of positive attention. He is seeking any attention he can get right now.
A couple of swats on the old butt never hurt anyone. Teach em now or the prison will.
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Smack them back,it hurts you more than it hurts them.
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A mom I know grabs her little boys hands and kisses them when he tries to hit and she tells him we use our hands to love and not hurt sweetest and smartest thing to teach them❤️
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Was he doing this before you had the baby?
Dnt spank ur child just give him a punishment take a2ay something thats verybdesr to.him
You better get a handle on him now before he seriously hurts the baby…He’s jealous…But you either spank his ass n talk to him how that is unexceptible behavior.Or grab his hand and smack hard and tell him no not exceptible behavior…OR you will be explaining to the law n DCS what happened to the baby… And Take Time to spend with just him…