How to handle toddler tantrums?

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Glad you stood your ground and said no!
‘Cause we DON’T reward or condone poor behavior…esp when continuing to defy and show out/carry on.

Yes I’m well aware children are little people with the same exact emotions as adults, they just don’t always know how to channel the negative emotions.(anger sadness etc).
She’s well aware.

And it’s so hard to ignore the tantrum(s) in public…good job mama and good luck😘

*all I have to say is “do WE need to go to the bathroom?, or do you wanna go to the bathroom?”
They both know a trip to the bathroom is NO BUENO​:bangbang::laughing:

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Counseling. My 4 year old ain’t that bad but she makes ugly faces when she doesn’t get her way and one thing I was ever taught by an ex is “you trade with toddlers”. If there is something they want, you tell them they can have it later when they calm down. I ask mine a question to throw her off to change the subject. I don’t care who looks at me and my child in public. There are plenty of adults who throw a fit over not being able to get a refund with no receipt.

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Toddlers are not adults they are learning so dun take it on ur ego… She is little… Jst gently explain her when u both r alone n explain whn u say no it means no

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I came across this one day and it sort of explained it quite well

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You hear about terrible two. I wondered why nobody warned you about 4. And then I remembered the Caillou theme song “I’m just a kid who’s 4”.

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I would’ve jerseys her pants down and blistered her ass

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My son is 5 and has been acting that way since he was 4, trust me I understand its hard and very upsetting, he has done ALOT better once he realized that he wasn’t going to get his way by crying, I was a yeller for a while thinking that was the only way my kids heard me or knew I wasn’t playing… I listen to “how to stop losing your shit on your kids” (chill Karen’s its just about yelling i dont lose my shit, its just a title) it helps so much… we all love our kids everyone parents different and every child is different, my daughter is 6 and acted like my son at 3 and 4 my son is acting like this at 4-5. We take stuff away when they act up… tablets first then toys, tv… one time the only thing in his room was his bed, and he had to earn his stuff back… yes he is only 5 but he has to understand that you don’t just get what you want when you want it. Prayers for you find something that works for YOU.

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try not to let her see u cry plus once things calm down take a drive u an her an go get the book but don’t tell her where y’all goin on the way ask her how did she feel when she said she hated u ask her how did she feel when she kicked your ask her who else makes her angry have a conversation about respect an also go to the library an show her a book about feelings or sumthn just make sure u an her spend time good luck n god bless

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Someome.needs a booty spankin’!!!

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Get a therapist immediately!

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Yep, been there. Then, I realized my child is more important than what other people see/think! It is up to me to teach my child!
So I no longer felt embarrassed, only determined. (Mercer Mayer books are really good!!! I’m sure there are others)
It is all right to recognize the child’s feelings.
I am a mother of two (one on ASD spectrum…and I found myself as single mom also)
****When a child says I hate you! I said, “I am sorry to hear that, because I still Love You!”
Eventually, (once child is older) I still love you but I don’t like your actions…We don’t act /talk etc like that.

****When a child sticks out their tongue…I told the child “That means kiss me quick and don’t slobber!”
It wasn’t easy to stay a step or two ahead LOL
I spent many a nights thinking how to react/ and what consequences there should be…
Also, expect the tantrums etc and prepare ahead of time please

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Children like us have bad days. Ignoring the fit and walking out was a great start. Second thing is tell her that kicking mommy or scratching mommy will get her a time out. If you get her out and she does something you have said no about straight to time out. Time out doesn’t start till she is calm. I have a 2 year old but I also have 4 older kids. I have walked away while they are on the floor screaming because I was the only one in the store. I simply said “I said no. If you want to have a tantrum that’s fine but mommy is continuing to shop. If you would like to calm down and walk with me we can discuss nicely why I said no.” Most of the time this got them to stop. The one time it didn’t I walked over to the next isle and waited. She is a happy healthy 8 year old today and well behaved mostly. Again kids have bad days too. But scratching, kicking, Hitting is not acceptable. She will learn faster than you think if you put your foot down now. We have the same conversation now when we go in stores and they are 13, 12, 11, 8, and 2. We are in here for this only. We will not be getting toys. We will not be getting candy. You have the choice of sitting in the car with dad or coming in and behaving in the store with me. No other options. If the 13,12,and 11 act up they get friend time taken away

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Not sorry for saying this but you need to spqnk her butt good and put her in the coner.

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When she is calm talk to her about what happened

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I learned this saying helps us a lot to avoid this. we came with a list and (a book) isn’t on our list today. let’s put it on our list for next time we go and we can think about what kind of book we might like until then."

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If this behavior is out of the blue and atypical, take her to a child psychiatrist for play therapy to make sure nothing bad happened to her to trigger such a violent reaction all of a sudden. If she’s in a preschool, camp or daycare, talk to her teachers about what they see and how they would handle the situation.

If not, and maybe you’re in for more of this type of behavior as she’s reached this new phase, teach her words to express herself, (“Do you feel sad, mad, frustrated or tired?”) and sympathize with her (“I understand you are mad I said no. It’s hard sometimes to not get what you want when you want it and it doesn’t feel good, does it?” “Do you think yelling and kicking is likely to change m mind?” “Are you having a bad day and this is just the final thing that sent you over the edge?” “Some days are harder than others, aren’t they?”

During calmer times teach her methods she can use to calm down and get herself under control. Deep breaths, visualization, meditation, sitting in the car by herself and screaming, watching cat videos—ask friends and professionals what they recommend at this age. Practice these techniques together when calm, and pull them out early in the tantrum phase.

Tell her when she’s calm you and she can find solutions together. E.g. “We can’t get this book now, but let’s see if they have it at the library tomorrow.” “If you really want that book, maybe you could take on some tasks and earn the money to pay for it.” “If the store is too loud and distracting for you, maybe you’d prefer to stay home with Dad next time while I shop.” “If you feel you are getting really upset, let’s come up with a signal so we can leave before you blow up.”

Work hard to stay calm yourself and tell her you are both going to take some time out until it’s easier to talk it out and solve problems. Ask her if she would rather go for a walk, sit in the car, or run or jump up and down the sidewalk or wherever it might be safe to do so to help get her frustration out and calm down. Might be good to have a pillow handy she could punch.

Good luck. Make sure she gets adequate sleep, nutrition, vigorous exercise and fun.

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Don’t take her to the shops

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All these comments sounds so goody two shoes… I would have gave her a big as hiding right then and there… And sat her down to talk story time… She is going to do it again and again…

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You only get what YOU allow.
Pull up your socks, and dish out some proper discipline.
You honestly don’t even sound like a parent.

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Dude sometimes you have to carry your kid out like a surf board. Don’t feel badly because it happens to pretty much everyone at least once. Standing your ground is key and you did really well. Always do that so she understands the consequences.

As for the cause : Hunger, exhaustion from growth spurts, anxiety, or lack of good sleep in general are very common every day issues that can set a kid off. If there’s been any big changes in her schedule where she’s been introduced to new people or she’s suddenly shy around familiar people investigate it. If it all checks out chalk it up to a bad day. We all have them.

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Look for an underlying problem. Red dye is often the cause of violent outburst. It is so nasty and is in most foods like white cake mix go figure. Another issue can found in children’s OTC medications and prescription medications is sudephed, it can really cause behavioral problems yes the drug they make meth from. Other allergies can cause behavioral issues as well so before you blame yourself or your baby look deeper please.

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When she does them at home make her continue as long as she is not hurting anyone… tell her it is a privilege to act that way and she will earn in when she does it for 20 minutes or you choose long enough time to exhaust her… this gets rid of the behavior.

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Mom did you ever do that? If not why or what happened when you did.
I don’t exer remember doing , but one trip to the bathroom with mom in my life was all it took .

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If this is out of the blue has anything happened? A change in home life, school etc? Sometimes kids can just have off days like us. Ask her what the problem is she may open up to you.

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Yikes! this ended up being a damn novel🤣
Sorry bout that. Hopefully something I said was helpful😳

Unfortunately tantrums come with the territory. Thankfully they do outgrow them. I have a now almost 3 year old boy and his tantrums aren’t really that bad, but one time a few months back he changed it up during a trip to home depot. He had a total melt down walking to the checkout line when he couldn’t play with the power tools🤦🏼‍♀️
Zero to 100 in 5.5 seconds flat. Dad was at work, but I had my other kiddos with me, so I was able to send them out to the car while I finished paying. Dang kid continued that tantrum the entire way home too, so rather than engage I just turned on the music (not loud) put the car in drive and completely blocked it all out (kids HATE that) he eventually got over it and I talked to him in the driveway. At two years old they don’t understand much, but I definitely still tried to make it as clear as possible that we cannot and do not get to behave like that… In public or at home. It was also the perfect time to explain to him that his actions have consequences and it will never be worth it. I have no idea how much of that information was retained, but knock on wood, it hasn’t happened since. Having gone through this with three other kids before him, I’ve learned that lots of things can help trigger a tantrum aside from them just not getting their way.
Example- skipping nap time, too many errands in a day, long car rides, excessive amount of time browsing the store etc. It’s no excuse, but things like that do play a part in it sometimes. So what I find helpful is tracking his behavior/cues. By doing that, I know when he’s had just about enough and it’s time to head for the check out.
I get in and get out as quickly as possible too and I avoid any and all toy sections like the plague!!! Most times we make it out with zero issues, occasionally we miss our mark by a few minutes and he starts to get a little fidgety and anxious. When that happens, I just remind him of the consequences and he usually stops before anything occurs. But mostly, I just try to run the majority of errands when he can stay home with dad, or send dad and he stays home with me. Toddlers tend to get over stimulated rather easily and sometimes quickly and since tantrums are pretty much a given at this age, if I don’t have to risk it then I won’t🤷🏼‍♀️ It’s just easier to avoid the whole thing imo. I’ve never experienced the hitting or mean remarks from a toddler and I’m sorry you did. I can only imagine the heartbreak you felt in that moment, so that above all else would probably be the main focus of our conversation. Reacting like that at any age is a big no no and needs to be addressed firmly but calmly. I mean I totally expect the occasional tantrum, overreaction, meltdown, but I will never expect or accept physical contact and hurtful words to be included. I’d also suggest that you don’t buy her anything but necessities for a good while either. It sounds like it’s the perfect time for her to learn that getting certain things is a privilege and not a right.
Keep your head up, take a deep breath and know that you are not alone in this battle :heart:
There are millions of us going through it right along with you!
I promise it gets better :raised_hands:t3:
… Until they turn into teenagers​:rofl::sob::woozy_face:

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Can’t ask me nothing like this cause my answer is always “WHOOP EM” :woman_shrugging:t4:

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She needs a counselor

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Just be consistent. That’s it. Find a punishment and use it every single time she acts up.

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Don’t be embarrassed. I’ve had to take my now 4 year old out of a restaurant doing the same thing. Thankfully I was with my family and just asked that they pack up my meal and bring it to me later. Out the door we went. Let me tell you, the next time he started up in a restaurant I threatened to do it again and he straightened right up. They learn. They don’t call 4 year old 4nados for nothing.

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Don’t be embarrassed!
I have walked out of many stores. Just stay firm. They will stop, but only if you keep up everything on your end and not cave in when you feel bad.

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I took my daughter to the store the other day. She started acting up (she was tired from no nap) she kept trying to stand up in the seat of the cart and grab stuff off the shelf and I told her no she started throwing a fit I stopped the cart and told her we would leave the store if she wasn’t going to behave. She stopped when I said that. Might not work for all kids and my daughter is only 2

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3 words WHOOP THAT ASS!

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I can’t help but I am going through the same thing only my son does it every day without fail a minimum of 10 times a day, I’m currently going through a “parenting course” because apparently his “acting out” from no longer being an only child but his been doing it along time before his sister was born and the family care person hasn’t listened to what I’ve explained :roll_eyes::triumph: so if anyone does have tips send them my way also!!

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Kids have big emotions that they don’t understand how to express. I think what you did was right. Maybe next time get on her level and just calmly speak to her and be like I understand that you are very angry that you can not get the book today. I would be angry to. Could you take some deep breaths with me (mimic taking deep breaths). I would follow up with when we get home I would love to read you any book that you already have.

As a parent of 4 I always try to set expectations of how I would like my children to act before entering the store. Such as we are only getting a few things today we are not toy shopping and we won’t be able to get candy at the register. I know that you guys are going to be my big helpers and when we get home I would love to show you how happy I am that you guys were great for mommy. What are some things we could do to show you my appreciation? Want to color or play a game together?

If all else fails I break out the electronics :woman_shrugging:t2:

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Send her to her bedroom when she acts a foolish make her sit on her bed bo playing nothing for 30 min and everytime she does this take away something she loves dolls ect

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Id put a straight jacket and muzzle on him. He’d calm down then.
(Just kidding)

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My austistic child does this every time we go out of the home. Idk if its anxiety or what but I have to carry her out like a sack of potatoes sometimes. I would make an appointment with your doctor. There could be an underlying issue.

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I guess I got lucky and my 4yr old absolutely loves shopping, even if he doesn’t get something. Not sure why. But if he randomly decided to do that, him and I would have a come to Jesus meeting in the middle of the store :sweat_smile::ok_hand:t2:

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The few times my daughter would have a tantrum, I would grab her by the shoulders and tell her - that is enough- stop it right now!!! She usually did. My Mom told me she had a few tantrums when she was little and her Mother would throw a glass of water in her face and that stopped her.

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My daughter did this.i laid down in floor kicked and.screamed just like her. It stopped her

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So very sorry. I hate this so very much.

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Beat her behind an punish her take every thing away

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A good smack on the ar…

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Umm the only thing that’s worked so far is me getting on the ground and mimicking the tantrum also. I think it kind of checks the child a little bit. Mine starts laughing

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Put her in her room. Explain why she’s there explain that this behaviour isn’t acceptable. It is not ok to lash out because you don’t get your own way.
I think she is just testing the boundaries, and it went too far. Small people with big emotions.

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My son use to throw epic tantrums when in public between the ages of 1-6 years old. He was diagnosed with ADHD when he was in the 1st grade, which helped explain those epic tantrums while in public. He was always pretty good at home, with just the two of us, but when over stimulated, those tantrums would surface. Common issue with children who suffer with ADHD, and no amount of good parenting will prevent them. The only thing you can do, is remove the child from what triggered the tantrum to begin with, which you did. Not saying your child has ADHD, but I wouldn’t be surprised if she does, but ADHD or not, removing the child from the environment that triggered the tantrum is always, the best solution.

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Help a mama out and respond anonymously on our forum. How to handle toddler tantrums? - Mamas Uncut

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Next time don’t take her to the store.

And when she is acting correctly take her and let her know not to ask for anything because you are only going for the things you need. Kids need to earn things. Remember your not her friend!

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Sounds like someone was having a bad day!!! She’s only 4. We all have a bad day every once in a while!!!don’t let it bother you to much.

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Nawww don’t be embarrassed, it happens and it’s normal.
Just remember when in these situations to remain calm, don’t bother talking or trying to reason during the tantrum as they can not understand reason when in that state of distress, you literally just have to ride it out, take her to a safe place and let her scream and kick and just ignore it. She will soon realise that is not how she gets attention or the things she wants. When she is calm and able to understand reason again, re-iterate why she couldn’t have it and maybe next time if she does the right thing she can get it :heart::ok_hand: good luck mumma

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You did exactly what you should have done. Removed her from the store since she was making a scene.
Remind her that that behavior is inappropriate in stores/ restaurants/public etc and it will not be tolerated. You will take her home and she can behave like that in her room.
Be consistent to!!!

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My boy did this. If we were out in public, we immediately removed ourselves (home). Sit in your room till you calm down.

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Don’t let it bother you too much! This is not your fault however it does need to be addressed appropriately. My recommendation to you if this ever happens again or if you haven’t done so already, when you get home and she’s more calm and collected sit her down and have a conversation with her about what happened, her behavior, how it was incorrect, and how she’s going to have a consequence for it. Although our kids are just kids, We sometimes forget that they have feelings too and even worse, they’re little so they are learning how to control those feelings and how to handle them. They understand a lot more than what we think, hang in there!

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Never give in to a tantrum. Keep her safe and don’t change what you have to get done. Where did she get the idea for this behavior. My daughter qould do this at an older age since we adopted her at age 6 we had a lot of relearning ahead. A policeman watch one evening in a parking lot while my daughter had a tantrum. It was hard but I kept my cool. My boys were great and I didn’t let her behavior stop or change what we had to get done that evening. Best wishes and prayers to you and your daughter.

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Is she in some kind of pain? A toothache, an earache, anything? I know it could just be a way to manipulate you. It seems like you handled it right though.
I’ve had to do the same thing, myself. I’ve also thrown a tantrum back. They were so shocked to see me beat them at their own game, they went silent :joy:
If my kids ask me for a hundred things in the store, I say, “But,can I tell you what I want? I want a new car, please, please.”

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I’d take Her to a sitter’s while shopping! I wouldn’t let my daughter go in a store after stealing Halloween candy! She had to stay in the car! This was before it was illegal! Maybe a psychologist that works with children! I told My daughter that They are different Drs and she could tell them anything and not be in trouble! She opened up the 1st visit the wife/team was shocked She was Soo open up! They had said that it may take 3 visits to feel Safe Soo I talked to MY daughter ahead of time!! Wish You & Your’s the best! Before that in a Mall my daughter had thrown herself onto the floor and I kept on walking away but kept watching Her!

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This is what worked for me. Taking notice of what my child wants and having a discussion about it rather than just flat out saying no (that’s so cool! Ooh! I like that too etc) then explaining we cant get it right now because blah blah. This really did work!

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I would have taken my daughter into the bathroom or a private place. Got down to get level holding her arms and firmly put her in her place. If you state any threats in this conversation, make sure you follow through with them. Don’t say your going to do something and not do it. That was my biggest issue. Empty threats.

I’ve went from you’re grounded to allowing them to earn time on their electronics or TV.

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Sounds like she might have been overwhelmed and overstimulated. Or maybe didn’t feel good especially if she usually doesn’t have them. My daughter usually gets them when she’s tired, doesn’t feel good, or there’s too much going on all at once.
You handled it the best you could don’t stress to much about it

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I ask to take a picture for later if that doesn’t work I pick up my son and let my better half finish shopping.

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My son once told me he wanted a new mom cause I would not buy him a toy at the grocery store, I spotted a lady at the meat county and told him she looks nice, maybe she can be your mom??? As I proceeded to do my shopping, he was stalking me!

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My 2 year old wants everything he sees. I ask if he has money to buy it. He says no. Ok, moving on. When you got money, you can buy what you want :sweat_smile:

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Spare the rod, spoil the child.

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Back in the day ,I was a newly divorced single mom of two boys ,could not go into toys are us without my youngest throwing a fit for a stick shift $500 dollar jeep,so embarrassing. I tried to explain mommy didn’t have that kind of money ,and to reason with him,no luck!!! So finally I threw a fit too,I wanted a new car too,some new clothes, a pretty pair of diamond earrings too. I put on a show ,he stopped stone cold,never had that problem again.:ring:

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i got two words. ass, whoopin.

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She is a four year old and you should not pay attention to her! Next time she attacks you like that you need to full on spanked her on her bottom, she will be surprised and shock that you acted like this in public but she will not cause ruckus ever again because you will not be embarrassed to give in to her! My child did this when she was four also and she just went down on the floor throwing a full on tantrum attack and I picked her up and she started hitting me I looked at her in her eyes and I spanked her in front of people and I told her she is to never in her life ever put her hands on me again! And I grabbed her arm and told her to walk! I was shocked that I even spanked her but I was proud that I didn’t think about people looking at me! Thinking that she would do that any other time would be just unbearable!

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Hitting children is not the answer. It only teaches them to do the same. There are plenty of other ways around this behaviour. Also agreeing with what holly has said.

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Do time-out. Watch youtube videos on how to properly do it.

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When my daughter did that i walked away just around the corner where i could see her but she couldn’t see me. When she didn’t have an audience(me) she quickly ended her tantrum and started looking for me. Of course I was close at hand. I don’t think she ever threw a tantrum in a store again.

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You are nor alone :heart: my daughter is 4 and we are going through the same. She is an amazing child. I can confidently say she is not a naughty child, she is so loving and caring. But lately the tantrums are so real and embarrassing. I have sat her down and these are a results of her dad not being here at the moment, she speaks to him daily but it has been a very long time since he was home. We feel like the only one it’s happening too but your definitely not alone. My daughter is not bothered by a smack, I can place her in her room, remove the iPad and other treats and she is not bothered, I am at a loss and also have no idea what to do.

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A good old fashioned swat on her behind will show her that behavior is not going to be tolerated at all.
I had 3 boys that are now 23, 21, and 16.
for the most part they were great. they behaved and were very respectful to others even at the young ages of 2, 3, 4, etc.
but there were only a handful of times where their behavior was beyond giving them a timeout or warning.
examples were hitting each other or me, throwing items that could hurt someone, or not listening when it came to a dangerous situation like running toward cars or the road.
I never beat them. I did smack their hand or gave them one swat on their butt. now these situations mostly happened when they were still in diapers so the swat on their butts didn’t hurt at all but the sound of the diaper getting the swat got their attention.
I would swat them and make them sit down for a minute and I would sit with them and I would talk to them. I would tell them why they got the swat and ask them to tell me why they thought I did it. even at 2 they would explain it the best way they could for their age. and they never repeated the action they got the swat for.
it only took the one time.
and I would take them all to stores with me alone and before we got out of the car I would tell them, ok we are getting this stuff at this store, we are not getting any toys or candy and we are not running around right? and they would agree
we all went in the store they would help pick out their snacks and if they could reach them on the shelves I’d let them get them and hand them to me to put in the cart until they were big enough to be able to put the stuff in the carts.
I would also tell them ok in this store you can pick out one toy, book, etc…but only if you behave until I’m done with my stuff first.
I very rarely had any issues with them and was always complimented about how well my boys acted.
they even held doors and helped others if they dropped something or still to this day say bless you to anyone they hear sneeze.
I used age appropriate language when they were little but I made sure they understood the reason things happened.
this whole you can’t discipline you kids, you just have to reason with them is not the way to go. we have seen a whole generation of those who essentially babied the whole time they grew up and the vast majority of them are not fully functional adults, they are the ones who feel entitled to everything and that rules shouldn’t apply to them.

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When your child tells you they hate you, you know you’re parenting right!! :rofl:
I have a 5 & 6 yr olds :wink:

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Normally I’d say nothing to worry about. But a few things have me wondering if this is worth a trip to a doctor. Her age, it’s not out of the realm of possibility, but it seems a bit old to me just start having full on tantrums. From my understanding they are usually do to trouble communicating. unless there is an underlying cause. It’s a new behavior. And it lasted all the way home.
I am wondering if there’s been any changes in her life?
As for how you handled it… we have all been there and you just try your best. Stay calm. Talk them through the emotions. I usually tell my son, what hes feeling will be over soon and we can talk about it. I take deep breaths with him. Sometimes he will let me hold him. Sometimes I give him space.
She definitely needs a way to express her frustration that is appropriate. Her feelings are fine. But tantrums won’t work and won’t help.

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My son threw a tantrum at the shop once i whooped his ass, he never did it again he’s 7 now and I always get told he has great manners

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Give her ass a could smack ?

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Spank. That. Butt. :slight_smile:

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no advice but I wanted to say that I hope you’re ok :heart:
its so hard when they do things like this. Just know you’re not alone and I’m sure you’re doing a great job

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My 4 year old son is the same and we’ve noticed it’s always when there’s a change (E.g telling him he’s going to be a big brother, me being off work all of a sudden). Shouting and the ‘naughty’ step doesn’t work. I’ve now started rewarding his good behaviour, we found a small jar and bought some little Pom poms and every time he does something good (could be something so minor like switching the telly off when told) he gets a Pom Pom in his jar and when the jar is full we go and get a treat! I’ve also found giving him more responsibilities helpful e.g having his own kids trolley when shopping, helping mummy put the dirty washing in the washing machine. Don’t get me wrong there are times I lose it with him, it’s hard when they lash out!!
My son still hits, kicks, pokes and pinches me but I also think it’s a lack of communication thing as well as his speech isn’t perfect! Have you heard of portage? We’ve just been referred to them to help with his emotional and social behaviours- hoping it helps🤞
I hope you’re okay, it won’t last forever even though it may seem it! You’ve got this❤️

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Disgusting how many people still want to hit their kids :face_vomiting: christ.

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Start having a tantrum your self. It socks they socks off a little one. Time out not work as by the time you get back home the child has forgotten why time out is needed

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I know you really want that toy and you feel really mad that you can not have it. And that I said you can not have it.
Calm voice even if your child is screaming and crying. You will be very surprised at the response you will get from her if she knows that you understand how she is feeling. You have to be with their feelings or else you will get no where with them.

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Step away from it. Why are you humiliated and embaressed? It wasn’t you who had a tantrum. Stop projecting your social feelings onto her. I would have put her into the car by herself and stood outside of the car and allowed her space to calm down. Then explain to her that her behaviour is absolutely not acceptable. You understand she’s frustrated but violence is not acceptable. Ironic when most of the people on here and telling you to smack her when your frustrated with her but it’s totally disgusting for her to hit you when she’s frustrated :joy: laughable.
Children can’t be negotiated with when they are in that mood. You are the adult you did the right thing removing her from the situation. Don’t react. You are upset understandably so, use that. You’ve really upset mummy by hurting her and behaving like that. Why do you feel so cross? Remove things she likes. Any screen time whatever it is. If you behave like that again then there will be consequences.

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Next time your frustrated and angry and stropping around the house your husband should give you a good smack. Nope… Because its illegal. Don’t raise kids who want to smack emotions away. Stop smacking kids for having emotions. They haven’t navigated successful calming down methods yet. That’s our job.

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You got this Mama. People in the store will stare and only pay attention for a while you don’t take them home with you. Life with a young child can be hard as it is without people having to stare. :two_hearts: Don’t beat yourself out you doing a great job one day at the time will get you there.

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No hitting ppl! Just tell the little monster they can stay in store till they calm down and you will maybe come back to bring them home. That will make them quiet immediately! If that dont work tell them its the last time they will go to the store! It works and noone is humiliated.

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I’m signed up to a parents parenting advice from my children’s school and I get sent emails every week. How I can deal with hard situations as I hit this point. I didn’t know what to do and since getting the help off tips etc my kids are slowly changing and getting better. For this week is about emotional support. I’m not sure if this will help. But it helped me. Whoever is this post. Feel free to inbox me and I can send some emails to yourself so you can also benefit off it. not every parent gets this help which is abit crap but I’m happy to share any advice I’m given too.

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Mine started that around 3. I stopped taking her. Found a way. Almost a year. She was always a fit thrower at home though. The only thing you can do in the moment is try talking. It’s ok to be mad, but it’s not ok to______. I understand that you wanted the book, but this is what we can do next time,_______. You are not going to be able to go to the store if this is how you act. These were some of my talks. I also use in my class if 1-3 year olds. Sorry you went through that. Hope it was an isolated incident. Y’all got this!

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My 3 year old son acts this way sometimes and my approach was usually to hell and to be agressive and now I find that being calm and asking what’s wrong and reassuring him that everything will be ok he will be 4 in November just talk to her! And tell her everything will be ok. Reassure her. Their are many other ways to calm her down.

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Toddlers are just frustrated little people, sometimes they cant communicate whats really wrong. It so hard to stay calm when theyre doing this i know (mom of 3 here, soon to be 4) my eldest is 9 and has ODD. Sometimes talking with them can calm them down if you stay calm and sometimes its just not going to work. Its a juggling act for sure. But ive found distraction is key! My current 2 year old can be sweet as pie or a scratching kicking nightmare, when the latter comes i simply distract her with something else, something i know she likes, she adores Elmo rn and so Ill sing the elmo song or play it on my phone for her to listen to. Even just being too tired can cause these emotional outbursts in toddlers…being a mama requires so much patience. She scratched me last night on my belly and it hurt so bad but instead of yell i said “no scratching” she proceeded to scream at me in her 2 yr old vocab so i said, bedtime? She stopped instantly. Find what works best and use it mama, god speed.

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A good f spanking does not hurt a kid,you don’t have to beat them,but on the other side you don’t have to reward them every time they smile at you either.!!!

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Pinching works to remind a child that mommy is in charge. A well placed pinch on the ear or the underside of their arm near the armpit works best.

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For those who say hit your child when they act up…how about when your having an attitude…bad day…off day…or feeling shitty cause you can’t express your self I’ll smack you around until you change your tone ? Smh :roll_eyes:

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Oh man us too, he is gonna start kindergarten soon and I’m so scared. He got kicked out of 8 daycares due to behavior. Hes in therapy now but he still acts that way. I just get away from him when hes hurting me. Send him to his room.

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First of all DONT be embarassed! Ive carried my son out of the store like a football a couple of times because he was having a total melt down. Focus on your daughter, not others (they will forget all about you in less than 5 minutes and move on with their day). Tantrums and fits will happen with toddlers because they cant control their emotions. Please dont beat yourself up.

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Help a mama out and respond anonymously on our forum. How to handle toddler tantrums? - Mamas Uncut

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I had this happen all bc I told her she couldn’t touch anything when we were checking out. But it seemed out of the blue she threw a fit kicking and screaming and I was trying to push my cart and hold her sideways while she was kicking me and screaming. Then this woman walked up to me and said “do you want me help you to your car? We have all been there.” From that moment on I felt ok bc I just have to get thru it and I avoided if possible taking her shopping with me except the grocery store. You will get thru this until the next phase…

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She needs her butt whipped, not abused or beat, but disciplined. Parents need to stop feeling guilty for having to discipline their children. My children are from 6-21 yrs old, I can count on one hand how many times they caught a spanking, that’s one hand for all of them together, once they know that a spanking is a consequence, then they will be quicker to obey. It’s not wrong to discipline by a spanking, as long as it’s not abuse, it truly does hurt us more than them, because no good parent WANTS to have to resort to that. If these tantrums aren’t dealt with seriously & quickly, they will last a long time. She’s old enough to understand.

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Do not EVER give in after you have given them an answer…. You said no…it’s a definite no.

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I would make sure my daughter was safe and let her have at it until she was done.

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A one time good old fashioned whooping, should solve this. Sounds like you and hubby have given your authority over to her.

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