Okay moms I just need to vent. Lately I’ve come to realize my husband does not appreciate anything I do for our daughter. I’m a stay at home mom and I tell him at least weekly how much I appreciate what he does for us so I have the ability to stay home with her. He’s never once said that I’m a good mom, never. For instance I just got over a terrible chest cold and haven’t slept in 4 days literally not a wink. And he has the audacity to say to me (when we were going to bed, I said I hope I sleep tonight I’m so tired) ‘you’re tired? I’m not the one who sat home all day watching muppet babies’ when he knows damn well I never let her watch more than one episode a day. He comes home from work and literally falls asleep while playing with her. Which she has to beg him to do and he always huffs and rolls his eyes about it and she is starting to pick up on it (she’s 3). Or he’s in ‘pooping’ swear he says he has to poop about 3-4x an evening is gone for 20-30 minutes at a time. She knows her abcs, can spell 4 words including her name, has known her colors since before she could speak (I used to say point to this or that color) can count to 15, knows her shapes and so on, she’s very intelligent. Does it sound like all I do is sit around the house watching tv with her all day?! No. And last night my first night of feeling better she catches my cold and is miserable, I tell him to go in the living room so she can sleep with me so I can keep an eye on her. Around 12 he comes in all mad bc she was sobbing and crying and said I’m getting dressed and gonna go to work and sleep in my car. Not ‘what’s wrong, does she need anything?’ Or try to comfort her just tries to leave. This continues on all night he keeps coming in all grumpy threatening to leave. So I not only am exhausted, trying to calm and sooth my baby and worrying about how to keep her somewhat quiet so he doesn’t storm off and leave. At 5 she calls for him and tells him she needs to throw up. (Me and my daughter have yet to fall asleep at this time) he stands there while she throws up in the potty as soon as I come to the room he walks away puts his work clothes on and leaves. I’m just exhausted and don’t know what to do here.
Ooh mama, this is just bad. He doesn’t appreciate you at all.
When he gets home from work tell him you forgot something at the store and leave him with the kids for a couple hours… when he ask why tell him your feelings and that you will leave if he doest change.
Next time he threatens to leave, say bye…
Yes it would be hard being a single mother but it is very possible. Parenting is a partnership. If you can’t sit down and talk to him civilly about your relationship, then I wouldn’t keep trying. Yes you stay at home, yes he works that’s half the situation at my home except I work part-time my hubby does chores and spends 3/4 alone with OUR son… Obviously the few hours he spends with your daughter is hard for him, so him talking shit about you being tired is unacceptable…end of story, no exceptions.
I would have told him to leave. You need to tell him to get his act together. That it’s hard work taking care of her all day and he needs to help out more when he’s home. If he doesn’t think so then he can watch her for a day and see for himself. And he better change his attitude ASAP.
I would tell him he is inconsiderate and rude. Tell him when he can decide to show a little respect you will come back, until then go stay with a friend, or a family member. Doesnt have to be an argument. Just state it matter of fact like and go. – I am very sorry and it sounds terrible…I hope things work out 
be strong mama!!
Remind him that you are BOTH her parents, and as such, you are BOTH responsible for caring for her. If he’s not willing to ever step in (happily), then it’s probably best to separate.
You are a good mom and wife, but I couldn’t stay with someone like that. And your daughter doesn’t need to grow up watching her mother be miserable and disrespected. I really hope things get better for you and your daughter.
Sounds like he doesn’t wanna be a dad in my opinion. Try to talk to him. Communication is key❤️
Sounds like he has his mind made up already if my husband got dressed in the middle of the night and said he was gonna sleep in his car at work I would be a said job to see if he is actually there because to me this just sounds wrong that is his baby he should at least make and effort my husband works and I stay at home with 3 kids he has never done this to me even when our 2wk old doesn’t sleep at night he helps me knowing he has to be at work at 5am
Sounds like he’s got somebody on the side. I would be checking.
Sounds like he needs a baseball bat to the head
Throw the whole man away 
You need to have a chat or you’ll be leaving…that’s not on. Your daughter is being neglected by him and she will notice soon plus what’s the point if he’s grumpy the whole time? You want that for the rest of your life? Give him a chance to change, if he doesn’t, follow through or you’ll be in this cycle forever xx
Not talking about how you feel will just make you resent him, try to make him understand what he’s doing, and why it’s upsetting. Talking always helps
If my husband told me he was going to leave because my daughter was sick I would say BYE! Your baby doesn’t deserve to be treated like an inconvenience, and neither do you. My husband goes through phases where he is inconsiderate and thinks only about himself. But we talk it out and I explain to him how hurtful it is and he acknowledges where he went wrong and agrees to try to change. If the man sees nothing wrong with his behavior then nothing is going to change. I sympathize with your situation but you need to confront him and explain how you feel. Tell him that no one else in this world is your husband, or her daddy, but him. He needs to step up and support you both and not just financially!
I hope things turn around for your family. Hang in there, mama. YOU ARE DOING A GREAT JOB.
I would say bye even though it may he hard. Sounds like that’s what you need to do. Has he been this way the whole time? If he has been this was the whole time, what makes you think he will change? Do what’s best for you and your daughter. Neither of you deserve that
Make it through today Mom but when she’s better, make a plan to leave. You and your baby deserve a better life. Put money away, or go to family or friends. This isn’t right, he’s way to selfish. Good luck little momma you’ve got this .
Sounds like he feels neglected. Have you all tried to talk about your feelings in a healthy non-battling way? You both are a team. Make sure he feels this. Counseling may be a good idea to help mend things. Praying for your situation. Also, if you feel like he is cheating, I would confront him about it. Better to be in the know then not.
Could he be suffering post natal? Makes and ppl born male can get it too. I had it for the first month. But he was in NICU for it and the hell of the first month was only the beginning for us. In retrospect I wished I had noticed how worse mums post natal was. I wish we had just talked like adults. Now it is to late.
Throw the whole boy away he obviously doesn’t wanna be there
Honestly sounds like he’s trying to pick a fight on purpose to me. I think he has somewhere else to go, thats why he always wants to leave. We all know it’s miserable to sleep in a vehicle 
Maybe he’s stressed? Being a one income household can be pretty stressful… sometimes men show their feelings differently… try to shoot for some alone time or a chance to see why he’s feeling how he’s feeling
Have someone watch the kids for a little while and you two should go out for a date night. He is probably bitter becuSe you stay home. I work third and my boyfriend works first and I get that way as well, not to that extent but I can see his frustration. If he’s unhappy with his work life that will trickle down for sure
Too bad he is the sole breadwinner! You are such a hardworking, responsible and great mom I can assure you.
Ignore the fool and try to imagine he wasn’t around at all while you look for a job so you can leave the grumpy jerk. Ignore him and don’t ask for help with the baby. Let him come and go as he pleases. Don’t expect him to help out either. You are single and it’s just you and your baby. He is just a housemate.
I’d try to communicate with him and if things don’t change you should leave. As said above, your daughter doesn’t deserve that and neither do you!
Idc how stressed or depressed a person is, it’s never ok to treat someone you supposedly love like this.
Put that fuck head to the curb, sounds abusive to me been there done that
Sounds like you need to communicate your needs to him and if he leaves let him go. Sounds as though he isn’t happy. Sometimes men go thru that when they have kids. I have been there, now I am divorced and happy to remarry next year. Best of wishes to you and the baby, hope things work out for you.
Do you try to pay attention to him too? Still be his girlfriend? Hugs, kisses, etc? Maybe he’s a little jealous?
Yeah he doesn’t appreciate anything you do with her, on that note, he may be a touch jealous for you getting to stay home. Maybe get a job and tell him, housework and parenting duties will be 50/50 and you’ll expect him to do his share. Or talk it out based on that plan. I’m not sure he’s had the opportunity to care for her if you’re not there and it’s hard when it’s your firstborn but that will get him to bond. Next time he threatens to leave, tell him to go. You’ll never be happy wondering if he really wants to go. What he does next will tell you where his feelings are.
Aww, that’s not good 
just because you are a stay-home-Mom doesn’t mean u are doing nothing but all day…I was that, loved it as well…He needs to wake up ,& Smell the Rose’s… Appreciate U & Let u know he Loves u & his daughter…
Do not expect PRAISE for the good works you do everyday as a wife and mother and you will not be disappointed. Your job as a homemaker is so important to your family. His job as the breadwinner is so important to your family also . Both of you need to stop finding faults with each other. I know that you want his help when he is not working at his job. Things do not always work out that way. You would not have his help with the problem if you two split up. You may not have a lot of help while you are together, but at least he is there with you and you two are a team. Do not give him reasons to pick an argument with you. Be strong and do the best you can for yourself, your child , and husband. The problems will pass and each day is a new day with possibilities of happiness. Count your blessings . Do not focus on unhappiness and your expectations of what you think the behavior of the perfect husband and father should be. Live and be thankful for the blessings of each day. May God bless you and your family.
Men are dicks. Honestly he will probably stay this way. You know you do good. Have more confidence in yourself. Make sure he keeps his nasty comments away from the kid(s) and says them in private only. Tell him those comments hurt. Your kid(s) know how much you do for them. They are the ones that matter. From, a stay at home mom. My husband does this crap too. Men are dumb
Make him a doctors appointment for his pooping problem 
set up a colonoscopy for him.
Time to have a “Come to Jesus” talk with your husband. If he loves you, he will listen and change. If not, time for you to get a job and start splitting the childcare responsibilities.
When he threatens to leave tell him too. Mine always did that and I said then go!!! He stopped and asked if I was serious, I said yeah you threaten it whenever you are mad, if you need to threaten it then you aren’t fucking happy so leave, I am fully capable of doing this myself because I do it while you are drinking or sleeping, so when you’re ready you know where the door is and stop with the threats… Yeah he did a complete 180 and is a completely different man because I stood my ground and thats what made him change…
Same girl. Same. Except my man would NEVER hear his daughter sick and crying and say “im just gonna go sleep in my car”
Sounds like my exhusband. Leave his ass.
Let his sorry ass leave then. Sounds like y’all would be better off without him.
first of all a woman Works 24/7 a man works their 8 to 10 hours and comes home and that’s it nothing else and it shouldn’t be like that he should help you out as soon as he gets home so that way you both can go to bed at the same time and love each other or you can stay up and watch a movie before going to bed cuddle that’s how things work if he’s not willing to do that, then if he wants to leave then let him go you deserve better
Unfortunately they won’t understand until they HAVE to do everything. This was mine and my girls’ dads issue I stayed home and and ended up in the pretty bad depression and he didn’t understand why things weren’t done. We separated for 8 months and we did 50/50 with our girls. A week at a time and he was forced to do everything for the girls which I normally did and he quickly realized it’s easier said then done. And now we are back together but living separate we definitely work together much better than before
You need to sleep! When you are rested you need to have a serious talk with hubby about love and RESPECT. If he can’t show you and especially his child either one then you need to decide why you are with him.
Tell him to stay home with her for a week and then tell you that you do nothing. I would have already blown up on him, but since you’ve made it this far being nice you should just tell him you need to talk and say mostly everything you said here! Maybe bring up counseling. It also sounds like you both need a break. So maybe you could ask someone to watch her and you guys could go on a date something exciting. If all that fails, I’d start looking for a job and a new husband. No point in being unhappy!
I hate to be rude, but he sounds like a deadbeat dad and a horrible husband. You said your daughter is stating to see this and she’s only 3? What’s it gonna be like when she gets older. You’re doing a great job with her mama. Be strong, do what’s best for her and yourself.
Spend a day actually watching Muppet Babies and when he comes home to a mess and disorder, tell him this is what it looks like when i sit around watching muppets babies. See the difference huni bunches??
Men suck… They don’t get it the only Man in my life that got it was my Dad. He was amazing, I think you need to pick up your daughter and leave go somewhere for a day and night. Leave him a note saying you need time away from him. Explain that marriage is 100/100 % on both sides. A stay at home mom is hard work! Being a mom is hard. I know some men work really hard but it’s not 1950 anymore. They need to step it up too! Especially when your sick. Tell him again how you feel. It’s not right he’s treating you or your daughter this way.
Yeah my big problem here is the “couldn’t care any less” attitude towards his daughter that you are describing. He should not even feel the urge or have the thought to roll his eyes because his baby wants to be played with. After not seeing her all day long he should WANT this!!! I’m sorry but if that is not something that comes naturally from him, towards her then I’d say he’s a lost cause. No empathy or concern for a sick toddler? Then honey, he will never have any for you. I say cut that dead weight and find some joy. And next.time he rolls those eyes in front of that baby for something she’s asking of him you should slap them straight out of their sockets and tell him when he gets his sight back he needs to look for the damn door! File for child support right away. I’d rather be alone and broke then ever sit and watch somebody hurt my baby’s feelings day after day. That’s going to do damage you may never be able to repair and give her self esteem issues that could affect the rest of her life. I know this is a major life decision and could be one of the hardest you will ever have to make but don’t take too long…their childhood is gone in a blink and it sounds like you’ve already been enduring for quite some time. You are a wonderful mother and it sounds to me like you already know, deep in your mommy gut what your baby needs. Listen to it!! 
And as far as these well at least he’s there and you’re a team… doesn’t sound like much of a team effort to me! And I’m sorry but a toxic person will do major damage to you both. It is NOT better to “at least have him there” if he is poisonous! If he ain’t helping, he’s hurting!!! And I’m not speaking of money! Good luck love
You should have told him to go sleep in his car at 12 so you only had one child to deal with. I would also stop doing anything for him. Let him feel what it’s like when you “watch muppet babies all day”.
Divorce as fast as you can. Please dont think that’s normal husband material. Get your ducks in a row and leave. It sounds like talking about it won’t do anything with his behavior
It sickens me how everyone is so quick to say “get a divorce”. That’s the problem in today’s world, everyone wants the wedding and not the marriage. Marriage is for better or worse. Talk it over with your husband when you’re rested. Is his job physical? Maybe he’s going through something himself that he hasn’t talked to you about? Maybe seek counseling together. An eye for an eye leaves everyone blind.
Try preschool or daycare , get a part time job and start saving money to leave. Went thru the exact same thing ans my ex never wanted to change so leave for your sanity
MEN very seldom can handle anyone throwing up without throwing up themselves. We as women and mothers just do what needs to be done and carries own what she was doing before!!!
I’m sorry!
It sounds like he doesn’t appreciate anything you do.
I’d be talking to him about counseling and it a separation.
I felt so unappreciated after our first born so I didn’t cook clean do laundry and have sex for two weeks. He got the message clearly lol
As a SAHM of 3 kids myself, I can tell you that I deal with the same issues, although I did not read the entire post, what I read sparks up so many memories and current situations I can imagine are very similar, I also thank my husband for doing what he does so I can stay home, and praise any effort he makes in the home, he is great (most days) about playing with the kids, going to the park, video games, hide and seek, yadda yadda BUT, after 5 years I have come to realize he will never ever appreciate all I do and understand just how exhausted I am most days and will never not expect me to keep up with the housework, cooking, cleaning, appointments, 99% of the driving, yard work, homework, ect. My job is 24 hours, his is 10-12 hours a day and he gets to relax and come home. I live in my work place, so I never have a moment to relax and when I do something doesn’t get done and I have no one to do it for me, we fought about this last night actually, he reiterated that without him none of this would be possible as if he thinks he is more important than I am and therefore I should just suck it up. It was the first day of school and things were kinda hectic, so I got emotional and overwhelmed, started getting angry and I had already asked for help earlier and he didn’t, by 11 o clock I was ready for bed but, he wasn’t and I had to stay up with the TV on for another hour fuming mad. Being a SAHM comes with more sacrifices and compromises than anyone realizes. I don’t think there is a perfect man out there and I think we all have our issues but what is very consistent is the dynamics between a SAHM and her husband, we all go through the same battles and struggles.
Ugh I feel this for sure😞 also a sahm and have a 3 year old plus 2 teenagers. My husband thinks because he works that he doesnt have to take care of the kids at all!! He spends maybe 10 mins with the 3 year old and no time with the teenagers. Im exhausted and ready to lose my shit and he just walks away. I hadnt washed my hair in days because everytime i try to get clean my toddler gets in with me. I say something and he is just like " yeah thats your job!" I honestly am starting to hate him and ya know what when it all blows up in his face Im just going to sit back and watch!!!
Yea look i have a saying… if i wanted more kids I’d have more… I would leave him. Someone who loves you does not do this. They supporr you through the good and bad times. I can tell you from experience it us much easier being a single mum then staying in this type of relationship. I wish you all the best. You both deserve a lot better.
Honestly, I doubt he will get it till he has to do it. Let him know that you are taking a non negotiable week long trip with some friends or some relatives on your own. That if you are going to do this parenting thing alone then he’ll need to give you breaks to let you recharge. Your overdue so this one will be a week long. Since he says you don’t do much anyway this should be a walk in the park for him. If he tries to stop you warn him if necessary you won’t give him a warning if he is going to make this an issue. That he gives you this break or stops whining and starts helping out.
I’m sorry about your situation … these ladies have good advice… for your mental health you just might need to separate for a while and see how that goes. Good luck! 
If your feeling up to it tomorrow get dressed and go out. Go anywhere even to the shops and have coffee and leave him to it. He sounds like my ex used to be selfish inconsiderate and mean. Just wait til he gets the cold that youve had he will be soooo sick and want you to run after him. Not worth the agravation . Id call it a day you deserve better
People can’t appreciate what they don’t understand.
In my first marriage I was the bread winner. Worked up to six days a week 10 hours. There was a time I had three jobs. He was the stay at home dad. I would flip the eff out because the house would be a mess and the dishes dirty. Came down on him hard.
Flash forward to now and I’m the stay at home mom with three toddlers and a seven year old. And omg. I’m dying to go back to work. I’m good at it but I hate it. And I now see what my first husband went through differently. Very differently.
Sounds like he’s depressed. It is incredibly har to be the sole provider. The amount of stress is enormous. Yes you’re grateful but he’s going through something and he doesn’t even know what it is. Men react to depression almost the opposite of women… with anger, seclusion and self medication. He needs help. And you’re going to try and figure out if you have the energy and love left in you to help him.
He needs therapy and perhaps medication, but if he’s like most men he won’t do it. So you’re going to have to read up on coping mechanism for male depression.
I’m not making excuses for him. A mental illness is no excuse for abuse. If he gets out of hand then get your stuff and get out.
I wish I could help or give you words of wisdom but I’m a ass an I would find s Joni need him out of my face only because life as he new it would not be the same he a mean uncaring man
I’m not sure how to fix this, but don’t allow him to be the first man to break your daughters heart. She’ll never recover. I’m not saying leave him or nothing but don’t allow him to be a deadbeat dad while still being in the house and all. He sounds like someone who never wanted to be a parent at all.
Divorce I don’t think so… this is a time to grow together. Marriage is work and its 75 /40 with each person giving 75%.
When was the last time. you had a date night? Sounds like you are both tired . So make date night simple. Drop baby with grandparents is always good if can be done. Momma get rested , long bath and fix him his favorite dinner and dote on him. or go out. If baby can spend night it would be great.
Or put baby to bed early, and do something together at home one night a week .
He isn’t a dead beat if goes to work and keeps the bills paid so you can stay home .
First thing u need to do is get ur kid feeling leave her at a grandparent’s house or friend for a sleepover. Then when he gets home from work yall need to sit down and address these problems dont let him keep acting like that to you and especially your child . Thats not fair to either one of you. If hes not willing to work on his issues. You might have to get out to open his eyes.