How to potty train a girl?

My 4, almost five-year-old daughter has stopped using the toilet and won’t tell me or anyone when she needs to do a wee. She used to always tell me when she needed the toilet and was using it fine on her own with accidents every now and then but has recently stopped going altogether and has started to pee her pants every time she needs to go. It happens 3 or 4 times a day, she will be just sitting on the lounge or standing in the kitchen or playing with her toys, and she just wee’s herself. I have told her and explained time and time and time again that you don’t wee in your pants, you wee on the toilet, and to tell me when she needs to go. When I ask her why she isn’t doing wee’s on the toilet anymore, she just looks at me with a confused look on her face as if she doesn’t know what she’s done. This is also happening at school, she is going through 3-4 pairs of pants a day at school, and none of the other kids have this problem. I’m so frustrated and don’t know what to do. I’m at my wits end and am so sick of repeating myself and getting nowhere and it’s really embarrassing.


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Please take her to a doctor! From the sound of it she either has an underlying health condition or she has suffered some sort of trauma.


take her to a dr… she should have been trained by one or two

You’re not alone. I have a 4 year old girl I sit on the potty multiple times a day and she just sits there until I put a pull up on then she goes in her pull up. Wearing panties didn’t phase her at all.

Agree check with doc. On your days off drink with her and when you pee tell her she should TRY to go pee. She’ll catch on. Change her immediately so she knows its not good to sit in it. Clean the bedding as well. Mine has to learn to wipe the 2. Uggh!

This happened to my kids when my ex husband molested them. It could also be a UTI (urinary tract infection). Definately take her to her pediatrician!!! In the mean time they do make larger pull ups to help save on laundry. Good luck.


Could be an underlying trauma of something happening.

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Sounds like a UTI. Get her to the Dr.

Maybe it’s a health issue

My daughter took a lot of antibiotics when she was young and the doctor said that caused her blatter to not let her know or she knew and couldn’t hold it

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Does she possibly have a uti? My daughter went through a phase like this when she was 3 because I said she couldn’t go to school and she didn’t want to go to school did you possibly say she couldn’t do something you thought she wanted to do as soon as I told my daughter she didn’t have to go to preschool she started using the potty chair

Please check with a doctor to ruleout a medical condition.


Sounds like regression! Unless she’s complaining about stuff, I wouldn’t worry. Just go back as if you were still potty training her. Almost every kid goes through 1 or more regressions with potty training. It’s absolutely normal. Ask every 15 minutes if she has to go, or however you trained her originally. Don’t worry, she’ll be back to going on her own soon.

Following. My son turned 3 three months ago and still doesn’t want to go on the potty. He’ll sit there and nothing but he tells me when he needs to be changed. I know it’s not due to anything inappropriate because only myself and my husband and my mom change him. And he doesn’t have any health issues. He just refuses.

please,please don’t get mad at her or show her you’re frustrated , take her to a doctor

Some children have this problem up till 10 or so. I knew a child like this. Went to several doctors for it

Is she having to be away from you other than school? Has someone inappropriately touched her? Please have her checked.

Have you seen a doctor yet?

Could anyone have touched her inappropriately?

Could be a UTI or (and I sincerely hope not) sexual abuse. Also maybe adhd.

Did something traumatic happen to her? Like falling through the toilet seat or falling off the toilet?


Has she been checked for a bladde infection?

Have you taken her to the doctor??? I mean, if not, then why??? So many things could be going on. Especially if she is doing it this much… UTI, bladder or kidney infection.

Please, stop relying on random folk to tell u what to do when there are trained professionals to help with this very issue. PLEASE!

Definitely get her checked out first. Then, if not medical issue work up a reward system. Explain big girls go potty in toilet & When she does offer positive reinforcement.
Set a schedule & use a timer.

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Could be uti/ could be fear from something that has happened / could have been sexually assaulted etc… - take her to the doctor and to a child psychologist


She may be filled with poop sounds funny but my daughter had same problem and she takes miralax every day, she may need just a regement of it to get her cleared out . Just try it

Sounds like a traumatic experience in bathroom. Seek professional help. Pediatrician and child therapist.

Take to the dr she may have a bladder problem or something .my granddaughter had Aretha problem

Take her to a urologist !!!