How to stop nightmares?

I have a almost 6 month old son, his biological dad left when I was about 3 months pregnant, I am currently engaged and to someone who is amazing to both of us . And i am truly happy , we live in Canada so how would he go about adopting our son, when dad is not in the picture nor does he believe the child is his and won’t have contact with me ?

Also how do you stop the nightmares that his biological dad shows up I wake up in a sweat and tears because I’m terrified of him coming back as he was very mentally abusive


Is he on the birth certificate? If so you have to get him to relinquish his rights. If he is not on the birth certificate then he has no legal rights to your child without DNA proof. If he shows up to your house I would open the door with your fiancé behind you and say this is my child’s father, you made it very clear that you are not his father and with that being said I’m going to have to ask you to leave my property. If he doesn’t want to leave, call the police and say that he is trespassing and you have already asked him to leave in a civilized way. Just remember, he’s on YOUR property, you have the power in this situation :sparkling_heart:

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Get him to sign over his rights. If he’s not on the birth certificate he doesn’t have any legal rights, until there is DNA proof.

You get an attorney and listen to their advice

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If he’s not on birth certificate, had dna test or paying child suport. Dont stress about it if nothing legally down on paper just add new fella name to birth certificate save pennies on adoption

Get a restraining order

It’s not an easy process. If the biological father is on the birth certificate, involved or not, he has rights and HAS to sign over his rights. If he isn’t, he has no legal rights to the child unless a DNA is done by the courts. The judge has to also grant those rights being revoked because in some states, a man can’t say “I don’t want to be a father to this child just because” doesn’t necessarily mean it will be granted, that all depends on the judge you get. Either way, take your time with the new person adopting. It’s a beautiful thing but it’s also a huge decision. If he shows up, call the police and file a protection order. Call your local family courts and speak to an attorney

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Canada is a whole different beast.
Get a lawyer and see. In the states it can be a very complicated process.
I’d also look into a therapist for dealing with the mental abuse. Could be a form of PTSD. EMDR form of therapy can be helpful.

Get married first- this makes the process easier. Then talk to a lawyer bc the process is diff everywhere


My brother knows exactly how to handle this as he has done it three times.

  1. Go to court and ask for child support.
  2. Court will require DNA then he will know for sure.
  3. Don’t count on child support after it has been ordered.
  4. Dont ever ask again.
    5 When he does not pat. Keep a meticulous diary and timeline.
  5. Alliw time to march on till you are certain he could never pay it.
  6. At this point have new hubby go to him with legal papers and ask him to relinquish his rights.
  7. Take papers to court and have new hubby adpt.

If dad not on birth certificate he has no rights

Just put the new dad on the birth certificate. They don’t do a DNA test, and it says right in the paperwork that whoever you put on the birth certificate you are giving parental rights to

I believe if his biological father was going to he would have already go threw the court system get a lawyer and tell them you wishes

Leave bio dad where he is and leave him alone the longer he stays away the better it is. Get married and move on.

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See a lawyer, they know how.

Court and a counselor. Adoption is permanent so if you guys break up he’ll have every right to parent your child. Definitely want to get married first and be sure.

Go to either your court house or family services…they will walk you through the process…and maybe once your fiancé adopts him the nightmares will stop

Is that guy on your child’s birth certificate? If not then your husband can adopt him. If that guy is on the child birth certificate then he needs to go to court and write away all his rights to the child and then your man can adopt your son.

In Canada the father goes on the birth certificate unless you say father unknown other wise dad is on it as for adoption you go to court house get the proper papers fill them out serve dad and go to the court date set out keep yourself a journal and even if the new one does adopt the judge can still make bio dad pay support

If he doesnt think hes the dad leave him off the birth certificate

Obviously seek a lawyer. U will have to have the bio dad waive his rights if he signed birth certificate. If he didnt, that makes it a lot easier for ur fiance to adopt. Also, maybe get married to just make it more official. It might not be important to, but it just solidifies the foundation. U got this and best of luck

Marry first, then go forward with adoption. Is bio on birth certificate? Hope not, you will need legal advice if he is. Just tell bio the baby isn’t his. He says baby isn’t anyway so that would work Don’t ask anything from him. Just sign off. No harm no foul and move on…Or just let your son go by new husbands name and don’t contact bio at all. My husband did that for years until he went in the Army he changed it legally then.