How to Talk to Another Parent About Child Hygiene?

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QUESTION:

"My daughter has a really good friend she is 10 years old. But she stinks and I don’t like letting her in my house. Not even trying to be mean or anything, she just really smells like a dead animal. Not even BO. I really think she doesn’t properly wipe herself after she goes to the bathroom, or wipe herself at all. I am not friends with her mom but I have talked to her a few times. I just don’t know how to properly bring this situation up. help?"

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TOP ANSWERS (AS SELECTED BY MODERATOR):

The following top answers have been selected by a moderator from hundreds of responses to the original question.

"Let her sleep over and show her through your kid about personal hygiene"

"Maybe try letting her shower at your house. Help her get her hygiene up. Poor child."

"Honestly, she could have a lot going on at home. I’d offer her an ear to confide in me. Ask her if she has the proper items at home and if not, buy them for her. Every child that comes to our house, has their own toothbrush and personal toothpaste here, just in case they forget it."

"Invite her over for a sleepover and have like a “spa” night and get hygiene baskets for the girls so she doesn’t feel singled out."

"It sounds like she may be neglected by her parents. Maybe help her with this by letting her shower at your home. This poor child might deal with a lot of negative comments on her smell. When my son was in elementary school, he had a class mate who smelled bad and had lice. This poor girl had two drug addicts for parents and did not only have to deal with neglect at home but with bullying in school. If that could even be the slightest case with this girl you know, encourage your daughter to befriend her and have her come over. Life could be very lonely for her!"

"That may mean the home stinks and that the parents aren’t clean either. You do NOT want to bring up hygiene until you know the family situation. I’m a foster parent and this is stuff we see all the time. This may not be a “her” problem but a family issue."

"So as a step parent of a girl, her mom never taught her about hygiene and she’s now 13 and I’m helping her get used to good hygiene. Don’t make her feel bad. Help her."

"I would try to gently talk to the other mother. My daughter is currently 10 and showers regularly, takes care of herself regularly, I taught her how I’ve seen her do it, and she straight SMELLS all the time. I’m worried she’s gonna start getting bullied at school. We’ve switched deodorants and body washes and her doctor insisted it’s a lot to do with hormones and the fact that she’s coming up on womanhood that can affect it. If I were the other mother in this scenario and I knew a parent was talking like this about my child I would be pissed off. You’ve got no idea what they’re going through or if they’re trying to help her or not which is why you should speak to the mom."

"You could always speak to the teacher with your concerns, they are in a better position to deal with things like this"

"Sleep over time. Make it all about bubble baths and doing nails etc. make a gift bag for your daughter and her with all the hygiene stuff plus girly stuff. Dollar tree should not be expensive."

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