My husband is struggling with his weight and self confidence and low testosterone…we haven’t had sex in awhile and I’m feeling guilty. I masturbate once a day or every other day after I put my kids down for a nap. I don’t want to push him to have sex but also I have needs. Am I right to feel guilty? Should I talk to him about it? I don’t want to feel worse about himself. He doesn’t want to go to a doctor should I get him the testosterone supplements from Walmart and see how that works for him? He drags all day no matter how he sleeps and he has restless nights up and down all night bc he can’t shut down.
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I’d definitely talk to him as a concerned wife. And get him an appointment.
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He sounds like he really should go to a Dr and have a work up done. It could be something else.It found be simple to fix.
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He needs to talk to a dr. Otc hormone supplements can be dangerous.
And dont feel guilty about taking care of your needs. Hes sex drive is low and thats ok, doesnt mean you need to go without.
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He could also have sleep apnea if he isnt sleeping well
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He needs to see the doctor. I’ve been thru this
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I would talk to him about it first. See if he would like to try the supplements to see if itll help. I would also suggest to him about watching his portion size while eating and drink more water. Thats how ive dropped 30 pounds. Although everyone is different but its worth a try. You shouldnt feel guilty. But definately talk to him about it all and see how he feels
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If he’s one that doesn’t like going to the Dr, I suggest referring to it as- we all should get annual physicals to know our overall health and it’s a good example for the kids 
We can’t give our kids all they need if our own cup is empty. Stay strong and supportive and don’t feel guilty for taking care of your needs, it’s better than straying to another man
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Low T really fucks a man up mentality, it’s embarrassing to go soft in the middle or not to get hard at all and then when the woman gets upset after that makes them feel worse
He needs help n encouragment from u its ok to have needs but coming to him for ur needs when he seems like he’s going through alot and doesn’t want sex with so much going on would be selfish try n get him better n feeling up to it first
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He needs to go to the Dr and have a work up done. If low testosterone isn’t his issue, supplements can cause other problems.
As far as you, do what you need to. When if it were me, I’d much rather that than someone breathing down my neck asking constantly.
That sounds like depression and anxiety due to his weight gain to me… Lack of enjoyment in things you normally would, closing yourself of, can’t sleep for worrying and no drive for anything. Take him to the doctor and talk to him, reassure him he is loved and that you’ll both find a way through together.
Maybe work out with him too? Show him your supporting him
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Having a check up sounds like a good idea.
My husband was the same way and sleep apnea was the culprit. Urge him to go to a doctor and see if they can do a sleep study. It’s a very serious condition but if he wears the mask everynight like he is supposed to, you will see a complete turnaround!!
Maybe try other supplements like maca, vitamin b, magnesium, and such. Some supplements help with energy for the day, better night sleep, stamina in every day life, boost of mood, and end up adding to the energy for sexy time by default. Just see if he wants to try certain combos to see what works for him. The ones I listed are what my boyfriend takes usually
Men NEVER want to talk to the Dr… You might want to sit dwn and talk with him about his health and that the dr could have some good ideas to help with dieting and any supplements to try for him… Can bring Testosterone up in the convo
He really needs to go to a doctor. Other things can cause ED like diabetes ect…
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As his partner, you have to talk to him. Let him know you understand his feelings and he is so strong for handling by himself. Remind him he has you and that your a team. Maybe getting him out for a daily walk after dinner is a good start. No one here can say what’s happening…so many different things. Talk to him, love him, and tell him he is going to the doctor. If u have to go with him that’s ok too. He needs help. Help is not weak. It takes a strong ass person to go through something and get help. If you make the meals, start making healthier meals. Don’t buy so much junk or processed foods. Leave pop and juice out of the house. Pay close attention to portion sizes. Look online of how someone his size and age should be eating to make it easier to lose weight. Look up some yummy recipes online. Every little things helps. See if you can get him up and out…go on a date. Make him feel sexy.
He needs to go to the doctor
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I’ve tried to get him to work out buts he’s really weird about it. We try and control portions. I workout and he supports me but doesn’t want to do it himself yet. I’ve tried to urge him to go to the doctor but his insurance has a high deductible and he doesn’t think it’s worth it. I will talk to him about the sleep apnea though! And he brought up the OTC testosterone. I do feel like if it came from another man he might take it more seriously and understand it’s common and isn’t a big deal.
It kinda sounds like he might be struggling with depression, those are all symptoms of depression. However, there may be an underlying health issue. Kindly talk to him and let him know that even if he can’t talk to you(it’s really hard for some people to talk about physical or mental health issues, especially if they are supposed to be the bread winner, such as a husband or a single parent for example) maybe he might be more comfortable talking to a Dr. Let him know you are there to support him even if that means being patient and understanding, especially if he’s having a hard time communicating any issues he’s having. The Dr can then determine if it’s a health or a mental issue. Remind him that life is meant to be lived, not just passed through and that by actually getting to the root of the issue is a sign of strength, that he has the strength to face anything, that he’s strong enough to do what it takes to be there for those he cares about and that care about him. Just my opinion based on my own experiences hang in there, and please don’t feel guilty for having needs!
He needs to see a Dr. Being mad about his weight doesn’t mean squat if he’s not willing to do anything about it.
It does sound like he’s depressed, which can be caused by a myriad of things.
Yes, talk to him. He’s your husband. You tell him how much you love him amd seeing him is making you sad and you want to help. Schedule the appt and go with him to show your support. 
**he can go to the Health Dept. They charge based on income.
Try maca root powder will naturally raise his testosterone worked for my husband.make sure you talk to him about reassure him it’s normal for levels to drop.maca root comes in powder or pills whichever he prefers also horney goats weed acts like Viagra
Don’t give testosterone without knowing he’s got low t first. Too much testosterone can cause anger issues, hair loss, and health issues
He should definitely go to the doctor
Instead of talking to the general public about this if it’s that much of a problem commonsense says go see a doctor! I mean I know everyone needs support but some of these questions leave me shaking my head!
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He needs to see a doctor. The supplements dont work. Plus there may be something else going.
May not be low t at all. He needs to see a doc, it’s the only way he will for sure know. Could be prostate issues, which t supplements won’t help. My husband went to our family doc and didn’t pay much to get testing done, etc.
Time for Doctors appointment! Too many variables, bribe, push whatever, but its exam time and lets see what his labs are before adding supplements. Good luck, God bless.
Xenoestrogens in our environment and food cause the feminizing of men by adding too many types of estrogen mimickers to their bodies. This combined with inactivity adds more fat and then the fat cells produce their own estrogen, producing more fat cells and so on. Stress is another factor as well as REM sleep. If you fix the stress and sleep, the metabolism might speed up and the fat will come off if he engages in full body, short duration exercise sessions. The more compound movement exercises the better. The sources of estrogen are vast and in practically everything so you will have to do some serious research to find out how to remove them. It can be done and the turnaround can be amazingly quick…
He should probably start with weight loss and that’ll help the horrible sleep and no sex issues in turn.
He needs to go to a doctor, there could be life threatening health issues - not just “low testosterone “
Go on Roman
He doesn’t need to see a doctor for the script- one will do it online. (If you want to get something)
He probably needs his yearly exam and have his prostate checked and his hormones. Low T happens to a lot of men, it actually occurs more often after men have children so their not so dominant.
Working out will help him feel different, also cut anything with soy and probably some sugars. It helps cut down weight in men considerably
My husband had some similar issues to this and you really need to get your husband to go to a doctor. My husband had to have his gallbladder out because it had ruptured and that was causing the majority of all of his issues
Go to your local Megaplex. There’s a pill for Men. To help him with ED. It’s one pill for about $20. But stays in system for 7 days.
My husband was the same way. We hadnt had sex in Years. He wanted to lose weight but didnt want to work out. He suddenly died Feb 5th of this year. Dont nag but plead with him to join you even for just a walk. I miss my husband terribly. We were married 28 yrs.
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Get him to a Dr cause there could be some very serious things going on with him
You could start with helping him change his diet maybe to eat healthier. Losing weight may help him gain his confidence back and the rest will come.
Unless you’ve agreed to a sexless marriage you should discuss this. Don’t let it get so big you can’t recover.
And people who get dicked down every day still play that banjo so no guilt necessary.
May have type 2 diabetes my husband went thru that till he finally agreed to go to dr, nothing to play with, make him go asap
He could get b12 tablets
They make supplements that while for healthy people it just boosts sexual stuff, but could be dangerous. Be careful if you go that route