My stepson will be three in January. We have him half the time, and between the two households, we weened him off his paci. Now, I find out that she [his mother] decided to give him the paci back at nap time. Because it’s easier. His pediatrician said that he NEEDED to lose the paci because of his teeth. He was doing so well for me during nap time, and now that she has done this, I am having the HARDEST time getting him to sleep without it. Now…my predicament. Do I give him the paci at naptime too, because she is? Or do I continue to fight him to go to sleep without it?
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Nope. Someone has to think about his health (teeth). His dad needs to talk to his mom and get her on the same page.
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Co-parenting is 100% about good communication between mom and dad. Your husband needs to communicate his concerns with your stepsons mom. My sons dad and i share custody and i go directly to his wife with anything i need or have any questions or concerns. (His dad works a lot so talking to her majority of the time is a lot faster)
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I agree she should listen to his pedi but SHE is his mother. Let her set the pace for what goes with him. Think about if the situation was reversed. How would you feel having the stepmother tell you how to parent?
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One day I threw out all paci, so it wouldn’t be tempting for me to give in.
It was tough especially for bedtime but after a week, my son moved on. Kids learn to adapt someway somehow.
Also dealing with a baby mama, try to be friends with her even if she’s difficult for the child’s sake. It’ll make getting on the same page so much easier.
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No, u will always have your rules and mom will have hers, definitely easier for same rules at both houses but different people have different rules
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Tell her simply to screw off. Do not give it
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This is your husband’s place. Unless you have an amazing relationship with the mother, stay out of it and let him handle it. You really have no say unfortunately.
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I wouldn’t give it to him. If I was the mom in this situation I wouldn’t mind if you still tried to make him go to sleep without it. Help counts anywhere in a mom’s life!
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Girl don’t give him the pacifier. Step mother or biological. What’s right is right.
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Talk to the mother.
Dont get heated in the conversation.
Just inform her that his pediatrician said it’s not good for his teeth.
Let her know that at your house he doesn’t get it.
We went through this with a bottle and we were very strict on no bottles at our house. It’s not easy to coparent but it can be done right if the childs best interest is considered by all raising him.
My husband and I coparent really well with his mom and step dad. It wasn’t always that way, but with time to has become that way.
Just because he’s “not your son” doesn’t mean you have no say. You 100%have a say in his best interest.
Paying for braces isn’t “easier”, though I’m sure she assumes dad will do that. My friend’s 14yr old is on round #2 of heavy duty braces because she sucked her thumb for years. So painful, so expensive, so much regret.
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My SD will be 8 in Nov, yes 8 and her mom STILL allows her to suck a paci. It goes everywhere with her, even to school in her backpack. My husband has expressed how ridiculous it is several times and has done everything from hiding the ones she brings from her mom’s to throwing it down the sewer drain. Her mom just goes and buys her another 
Sometimes dad’s say does no good, mom will do what she wants anyways.
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Hopefully you can both be adults and get along for little boy so maybe your husband/Daddy can talk to his Mommy about his teeth and she will comply but remember there will be times you will need to comply.
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Best thing to do is go to the pediatrition together
Id give it to him if it helps him
Your husband needs to have a conversation with the mom. I know people think you are overstepping, but YOU are the person having to deal with this. Also, three is way too old for a paci. This mother needs to care more about her child’s teeth than her inconvenience.
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Who needs a doctor to know that 3 YEARS old is too OLD for a dam paci!? Give me a dam break. Its 2019. Get it together! And continue doing whats right for the child. Its all for the best interest. I’m a mom and a step mother.
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How sad. Kids shouldn’t have bottles or pacifiers after a year according to my pediatrician.
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Do the right thing listen to his doctor orthodontia is expensive
Cut the paci down the middle with sissors. Offer it at nap (they wont want it) self weening!
Your husband needs to have a talk with the mom about it. No pacifier in my opinion.
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Don’t give. That’s the right thing to do.
Considering a medical professional said that for the sake of his health it needed to go…I’d say you’re in the right here. The biological parents need to have an adult discussion on the topic.
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This isn’t your place 
he needs to step up and take of this …
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What did his dentist say? My kid has gone to the dentist every 6 months since his first tooth popped and hes almost 3. Uses the binky and he isnt concerned at all. I of course want it gone, but hes autistic. So it’s a battle. Anyways. Pediatrician is not a dentist.
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Hold ur ground! It’s better for him to not have it. Hell get used to not having it.
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Your husband should talk to her about it.
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Let him toss it in the trash can and out of his sight take it out, put it in a bag and take him to a dumpster AWAY from your home and let HIM toss it away and then praise him with a trip to the ice cream shop or get him something he really likes!
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Let your husband discuss it with the child’s mother.
Some of these comments kill me! Y’all are essentially telling her it’s okay that bio mom is being a lazy and irresponsible mom because that’s his mom and she can’t do no wrong! You definitely need to address this issue! Binkies can cause serious issues with baby teeth which in turns causes issues with adult teeth and leads to YEARS of pain and discomfort! As far as I’m concerned that is in itself a serious issue and neglect! Yes you are the step mom but if she is unable to do what is going to cause years of dental issues after she has been explained by a medical professional that it needs to go then that in itself is neglect and as far as I see makes her a shitty mom! Talk to your husband and tell him that it needs to be addressed immediately or you will be addressing it yourself! Screw this step moms need to mind thier business! If there are concerns when it comes to any child say something yours or not!
No…my daughter was 2…3 is too old.
My son was 6 months when he just decided he didn’t need his binky anymore, I’d have the father talk to the mother about it… you all need to be on the same page about stuff so the child isn’t confused and it cause issues.
Continue the fight. You may be the only consistency that child has.
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First of all you the best not everyone would look after someone’s child like you do and showing that u care,but his already old enough so daddy should have a discussion with the mom to stop that u can’t have him in two different ways it’ll cause disruption in some way.
Keep doing what you feel os right, but have your husband talk to her to keep the probs down.
Dont give it. Have him speak to her about it.
stay strong, don’t give it to him. for me it was the opposite 
at 18 months we got rid of the paci, except at nap time… but when i mentioned it to his daycare, they told me he never used a paci there LOL he’ll be fine. but dad needs to have a convo with the mom and explain the health/dental issues.
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Up2 his dad no you end of day he isnt your boy. Would u be happy someone else taking your sons soother?.
at your house your rules, at moms her rules
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Dont give it to him. Dad needs to talk to her about it. I find that lazy. If he was doing well, then there should have been no reason for her to give it back to him. If there are any at your house, get rid of them completely. He will learn that at moms house things are one way, and at dad’s it’s another. It will not damage him or confuse him. Kids adapt so well. Dont give in. I’m a step mama and I wouldn’t give the paci. Also, my husband would reem the ex out if that happened in our family. Lol. Dad needs to stand firm and strong
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You need to mind your own business.
He’s three. He’s old enough to know what happens at Mom’s house happens at Mom’s house what happens at Dad’s house happens at Dad’s house and they have different rules. He’s not a baby. Don’t underestimate him. Stick to your house rules and make sure you reiterate that this is here oh, and that is there.
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