So divorce him. Why on earth would you keep your kids around some dude that doesn’t want you anyway.
Try developing some standards for yourself. Be a better example for your children ffs and stop having sex with a dude who doesn’t even like you
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Could use much more better words but ja Fb, so im gonna go vir Asshole!
Laws are different from state to state but in many states he can not take martial property and sale it or leave with it. The van is marital property unless he owned it before you got married.
You need legal representation immediately. Even if you have to take out a loan to have the money to hire an attorney. Half of everything in the bank account was yours and he will have to pay that to you in the divorce settlement. Leaving the way he did was a real jerk move and a mistake on his part. Get an attorney now!
Then, go file for food stamps, child support, and welfare. You can do this stuff online these days. And, start putting in applications for low income housing everywhere if you don’t have relatives you can live with. If you get low income housing your rent will be based on your income. This will be a huge relief for you while learning to navigate being a single parent.
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Also, if you have a women’s shelter nearby, use them! They usually have expertise in helping you fill out and file legal documents, find resources, and offer amazing support. Even if you aren’t staying at the women’s shelter, they should be willing to help.
He moved out because he was cheating. Fk him up. File for everything and request that car back in the divorce since your kids need it.
Reach out to anyone in your community for help: social workers, friends, school personnel, food banks, churches, government. There are people who care and organizations to help. Reach out! I am so sorry for you and your family.
He has to leave you with a vehicle. Did he not want another child? First thing to do, is get help from your state aid program and make sure you have food for the family. Then, I suggest that you get a job. There’s no point in talking about him now, you have to step up and do everything you can for your family. Your husband will have to pay child support. Report him as the father of the kids to the state aid office when you sign up for assistance.
First thing file in court for temporary orders. He needs to pay temporary support and continue to pay bills. Establish who gets custody. If you have a joint account, print the last three months activity. You are entitled to half the balance on the day you separate. Open your own account. Apply for welfare if you qualify. Get the kids in daycare or look at online jobs
Get a divorce and take
Me him to the cleat
Brandi Jessica Muchler hook up with a lawyer t oo…there are lawyers that work for free…Legal Aid…or perhaps your local courthouse has services available… have joint accounts closed and make sure utilities etc are under your name only. Apply for public assistance for cash and food stamps(SNAP) In my state you can apply online and can get emergency assistance. Once you speak to a worker you will get hooked up with medical assistance as well plus…the Department of Revenue will contact you and go after your spouse for child support. The department can help you in so many ways, child care if needed for when you do go to work, job training, schooling. …talk with your medical provider about groups offered as support for mothers kids etc…right now I’d say he did you a favor because you can recieve more things to benefit you and your family…discounts etc…make sure to apply for Fuel Assistance to help with energy costs and once recieving state benefits you may be able to get special rates for your electric bills thus lowering the costs for you. Sweetie…this sadly happens to alot of women but hang in there…there is help out there …don’t be afraid to ask…churches, schools ,various agencies etc are there to help…you can do this…good luck to you and your children…
Depending on your state, he can’t even file for divorce while you’re pregnant. So after you look into that, he’s also not allowed to just take a vehicle since you’re married. All of that has to be divided up properly. He also can’t withhold any money in any accounts, so go get another super cheap vehicle if you guys have the money. There’s always tons of beaters on the marketplace.
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Lawyer and take him to court for child support and if your area does alimony.
What kind of dude leaves his wife right before having his kid and takes the car so his wife can’t provide for his other kids… smh
File against him for spousal abandonment, put all your money into your own account so he can’t use it up on you, go get a lawyer and file for divorce on grounds of spousal abandonment. File for custody of the kids, child support, and assistance through the state. Do not compromise, stick to your guns, because once he sees how much all those will cost him he’ll probably try that “I want my family back” crap. Do not fall for it. Hang in there mama
Your first step is to go to your local welfare office and file for literally everything you can. The process takes a bit, so call the local food banks and such and ask for help until that goes through.
Sell anything he left worth any value and ask for help from anyone and everyone in your life for donations to help get a lawyer. They can take him to court and nail his ass to the wall. What he did was abandonment. In situations like this, if alimony isn’t going to be a reasonable amount, a lawyer can ask for something called “Family Support”. Basically, it’s more than what you’d get for child support alone and the purpose is to help support the spouse so the household can be together when the other partner leaves suddenly and one spouse is left in the family home with primary care of the family. Also, the lawyer can get a judge to order he give the van back in working condition immediately as you’ve got the kids and NEED transportation.
Lastly, if you have any good friends willing to do you a solid favor, have someone follow him home from work and see if he’s shacked up with a new woman. The lawyer may be able to use him cohabitating as a way to get more funds for you as well.
The first one to get their parenting plan proposal in will have leverage, so file that, and your child support immediately! Also, pull any money you can and start your own accounts at banks he doesn’t use. If you need help with the parenting plan, please message me. I’ve done five of them.
I’m sorry your going through this but it sounds like you are better off without him because someone that can just up & leave his children with nothing especially the family vehicle (which is needed to go grocery shopping, Doctor appointments for your children & unborn baby, etc). That type of person sounds like a true pos that isn’t capable of caring about anyone but themselves! I don’t care the reason he wanted a divorce because to just leave your pregnant wife who’s almost due & your children with no transportation, money for food, bills, etc is a real pos! I know it’s scary Momma & it won’t be easy but you’ll figure it out & you got this!
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You can do this I did it with 4 just take one day at a time
Court! The way he’s left you and your children is not okay! File immediately, get your van back and go sign up for all assistance you need to get you by until he is ordered to do the right thing!!!
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Consult with every good lawyer before he does! If you consult first he will be unable to use them.
Then file support. I would try to apply for food stamps, wic, tanf, housing support.
Empty bank accounts. I would also pin your kids ssn numbers.
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Go file for custody and child support…see if your state does spousal support too.
Go to your local government office apply for all assistance including daycare. Gave you filed taxes yet? Maybe that money can help get you a car.
But remember you’ve got this and you’re an incredible badass mom!!!
Take him for everything he has!! Get to a courthouse immediately file for child support, file for alimony, the whole nine and demand your van is returned!! And when he realize he can’t afford all that don’t you dare take him back!!
He left you pregnant with three kids and took your van oh hell no that should be all the encouragement you need!!
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You got this!!!
I wasn’t pregnant but abruptly informed relationship was over after almost 19 years with the asshat. It’s devastating and very challenging to accept the sudden changes and emotions. But you can and will do this without a man especially that man!!
Cry it out, scream whatever, and then get you a pen and paper and write yourself a plan and start doing whatever is needed to male things happen for you and your kiddos.
Put him on child support asap. Hopefully that’ll help you to get a big enough car at least!
I think you can join a women’s shelter for abandonment. Get back on your feet
Go get that van back. Get a lawyer and serve him with papers. Tell him to communicate with you by text only. Answer a text from him only if it’s about the kids. Establish a custody agreement where he gets the kids every weekend. He will be crying to come back. Don’t let him.
I feel like there is another whole side to why he left…?? But I would file for temporary full custody until you go to divorce court, get child support going immediately. Do you work at all? Does he carry the family’s health insurance?
1st thing. Give your children a big hug. 2nd file for custody of your children with the court. Do not let him back !! Check out and file for any services a woman with 3 children can get. Love yourself and good luck
Apply for legal aide for a divorce. Get custody & child support. Apply for daycare assistance, food stamps, & medical benefits at your local D.H.S.
A man like this is no man!
File for custody, child support, spousal support. Apply for food stamps, HEAP, WIC, cash assistance. Contact local groups/churches for assistance. Also, if the van is titled in ur name only, u may be able to contact the police and get it back. My ex-husband and I have two kids together, who were 5yo and 8mo when he left us. They’re now 21yo and 16yo and thriving. Stay strong, mama. U got this.
First of all I am sorry you are going through this. Any man who does this probably wasn’t a great or even good partner to begin with. He may be doing you a favor. So lawyer up. You can most likely make him pay for the divorce lawyers. Both of them because you should never use theirs. Even when they say it will be fine. It wont be. I can’t see any court cutting a guy like that any slack when he behaves that way. When he sees how little he will have to live on while paying support and medical for 4 kids and maybe alimony depending on how much he makes he may well come back. Hopefully he will find the locks changed. There are still really good men out there. I hope you find one.
First of all you have the kids that vehicle stays with you. Any judge in court will tell him that…I know you haven’t got that far yet but. Sorry you’re going through this
If ur name is on the van report it stolen because he won’t give it back and u got kids to take care of.
1 st try not to put personal laundry out for everyone to see but get some counseling and legal aid might help w setting up child support from your ex
Contact a laywer. Get child and spousal support. Make him keep you and kids on insurance. Get half of his 401k, retirement, savings and cking accts. Get to stay in house. Do It NOW.
Call family services, food pantry, local churches, For immediate help!
If you set up Venmo post and I’m sure you will get financial support 