I am a SAHM and starting to feel lonely: Advice?

I recently stopped working to be a stay-at-home mum to a toddler. I’m pregnant with baby number 2 and gave up a demanding career to focus on our family a build while my partner runs a busy company. Maybe naively, I thought I would see my other mum friends more, but they have older kids and are spending more time with school mums, so we’re all drifting apart. I’m so lucky to be able to stay home & not work and so grateful - but I’m starting to feel down, lonely, and frustrated. Is this normal for SAHMs? Any advice?


Definitely normal to feel this way! I worked in a very demanding job for some time before I fell pregnant with my 2020 baby. I’m now at home with them full time and I’m due with my second this year. I feel really isolated a lot of the time as I live in a small town away from all of my family and my closest friends are 1.5hrs away with no kids. It’s hard mama but you’re doing amazing x

Help a mama out and respond anonymously on our forum. I am a SAHM and starting to feel lonely: Advice?

It’s normal, and it sucks. I have 8 kids and this is the absolute number one reason I went back to work.


Yes it gets lonely. You have your good days and bad days. Not everything in your house is going to be up to your standards. You can try talking your little one to the library, park and getting out of the house at least every other day.


Join local groups of sahm. They can be your new friends with kids of the same age. It’s gets lonely in the sense of with your partner but it’s still fruitful for you and your child socially.


Join the peanut app… You’ll meet new friends

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Yup I’ve been there up until just recently when my oldest had ballet camp and is going to preschool this august I finally have some moms that have kids the same age as mine and and are close to my age once I found that out we started to message each other and have planned to meet up and do play dates. But trust ive been a stay at home mom for at least three years with a job or in between for a short while it does get lonely. Message me if you need someone to talk to I have three 4 and under!

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I have just started to be a SAHM … and I can say I love my children… but I go to play ground to try to talk to other adults lol… I have yet to find like a “best friend’s” but I have little convo here and there… always like to do play dates but they never happened when planned… your more than welcome to PM

Yes completely normal. Get out and find mom groups w close age w tour little one. Or even mom groups alone. Make sure you take away time for yourself w out your baby. Away from the house to get a breather.

Welcome to sahm life


Check out your local library. I used to take my kids to stuff there and meet other moms. They had a toddler story time and everything.

Go to park talk to other adults at the park

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Its often a lonely job because even though you technically you aren’t alone they’re babies so on an adult level it can be lonely. I’m a SAHM too so if you need to talk im here. I have a toddler and two older kids.

Are there any local play groups you can go to, to meet mums with kids the same age as yours? Chin up!

Join a mommy and me group.

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See if you can fit a part time remote work at home job. Call center, customer service, insurance

Parenthood can be a lonely thing. Especially, if there are no friends or family with kids in the same age range as your kids. I’d suggest putting your child in something like gymnastics, cheer, soccer. I have met friends that way. Also, once your child is school aged you can meet a lot of parents and set up play dates.


Make some time to do you !!! Talk to some friends. Text people more. Call people more. :heart:

So, so normal. Going into it, I thought that it would be so amazing, we would have so much fun and I would have so much time to do things and see friends. But, it can get terribly lonely.

My advice would be to prioritize your own self-care. Do things that lift you up and make you feel more like yourself whether that’s weekly dates with friends, self-care routines, hobbies, a side job, etc.
Find local play dates, meet ups with moms and kids your age, weekly adventures/story times, etc. Reach out to people you trust and help them hold you accountable or join you. Find a good babysitter so you can have consistent dates with your SO. Exercise, even if it’s just a walk.

SAHM life is HARD and LONELY sometimes, but it gets better as you take care of your own needs as well.

Join a mom group with kids the same age as yours. There are usually tons out there. For instance here we have strong start, swimming clubs, library clubs, walking clubs, fitness clubs, yoga clubs there are all sorts.

My church has a moms group that meets twice a month! Literally, we eat breakfast, chat, sometimes do crafts, sometimes a guest speaker, a devotional, etc.

Park days with your kiddos and talk to the other moms there.

Our local library also does a weekly toddler time. Easy to meet momma’s there!

This is unfortunately a normal feeling… :confused: Find a hobby you really enjoy doing and do this hobby with your kids. For me, it’s sewing. Some of my favorite days are when I get to go fabric shopping for my next project. It gets me out of the house, gives me something to do other than “just” cleaning the house, and it’s something my daughter and I can do together as she gets older.

Very normal but if you ever wanna talk my inbox is always open. I find it difficult to make friends which sucks

That is completely normal!
So many others with some great advice joining other mom groups with same aged children, church groups, library, etc.

Be kind to yourself and take care of you as much as possible while finding the right place to make new friends. It’s so easy to forget about us and so easy to put “Mom” over “Self.”
You not as a Mom is just as important as being a Mom. I wish I had learned that sooner in life. Being a Mom “only” is draining.
You are on a great path trying to get where your new chapter in life is taking you! That’s awesome!

Completely normal, why not look for other stay at home moms in your town and set up play dates where you and other moms meet up and let your children play, could make a potluck out of it. When I was a stay at home mom I wish the internet was this advanced where I could search out others in my situation (my kids were born in 1993, 1997, and 1999) the loneliness gets horrible. My ex and I agreed I would be a stay at home mom as long as we could afford it, then I would find a job to work around his work hours, and it would be only part time until the kids were all in school full time.

It can be a bit isolating… just try to talk to your partner and family often and see whoever you can! I enjoy taking my son to the playground just to get out

Start couponing. Helped me pass the time while I was home with my girls.

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I’m stay at home mom it does get lonely I try to find things I like to do I’m trying to learn to sow, I love to read I spend a lot of time outside in the summer you can always message me if you need someone to talk to

Help a mama out and respond anonymously on our forum. I am a SAHM and starting to feel lonely: Advice?

Maybe try to find a mom/toddler programs. It was a great way for me to meet other moms with children the same age as mine and could arrange playdates outside of the program.

Im a stay at home mom, getting ready to transition back into working. Given I never really had a lot of friends to begin with, but after pregnancy I definitely felt lonelier. Reach out, and definitely let your partner know how you’re feeling.

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I would say Find a hobby , and focus on getting as much rest as you can . Your pregnant, it’s gonna get hard. Relax take care of yourself have fun with your baby . Make sure to talk to your partner and get some night out with him to . It’ll make you feel better . Maybe even ask for a little bit of money every paycheck so you can go out during the day or whatever

Have you reached out to them? Alot of the time when you are in different stages each party feels the other doesn’t have time and no one takes the time to reach out.

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Get some new friends that have babies too join a mommy and me class, go to pregclass, tiny tumblers, call the YMCA nearest u see what classes the have offer, I moved from north Cali to southern Cali didn’t know anyone but my hubbi and his mom and dad

Totally normal, I find myself feeling that way at times. Your not alone. I too wish I had more friends to socialize with.

I too just quit to be a stay at home mom to a 4 and 2 year old, and there are days I am so excited to run to the grocery store to talk to someone taller than 3 feet! Lol but I have to force myself to have conversations with other adults like even a 15 min phone call with a family member. I also find myself taking my kids to my grandma’s house (she is in her 70’s and know how to get my kids to settle down) just run around the front yard. For me it’s all about small social interactions, joining a community Facebook page for other moms that lead me to group play dates with other kids my children’s ages.

Take class when hubbi is home let take care of the kid

I felt the same way at first, it took about 3 months to adjust.

Go get your toes done

Find a mommy and me class

Help a mama out and respond anonymously on our forum. I am a SAHM and starting to feel lonely: Advice?

Help a mama out and respond anonymously on our forum. I am a SAHM and starting to feel lonely: Advice?

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I became a SAHM during my pregnancy with #2 and didn’t return to work till #3 was 2 years old. While im blessed to have had the time those 7 years took its toll on my mental health. About halfway through that time I joined an active playgroup. It was a life saver.


It is very lonely but for me it’s worth it! I do miss talking to adults thorough the day though. So much :joy: Being outside helps for me. Going for walks and stuff. Now mine are a bit older I see other parents at the school run and for the past couple years I’ve been walking most evenings with some wonderful women and I think that makes all the difference for me. An hour of adult conversation is like a reset button sometimes. I tried toddler groups and such but they’re not really my thing. I hope you find something by that works for you.

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I know rhe feeling all too well, i litterly have no friends, and my crippling social anxiety doesnt help, i was supposed to have a supoort worker but they abandoned me when my daughter was 6mo and a year later i havnt had any contact with anyone (not even a health visitor) i do take my daughter to a group on fridays but they chindrens centre have stopped doing all the free groups and theres not a lot open still due to covid.

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My daughter has an app(can’t remember the name) but you can meet other moms- with kids your child’s age-
Also see if there is a child care co-op- you work there part of the time and part of the time your child goes without you.

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I’m a SAHM of 3 beautiful boys aged 5,3and 11wks I love being with them and watching them grow,learn and play but have lost so much of myself and lost so many friends, I wouldn’t change it for the world tho. I had a look around at mum groups and playgroups in the area. It’s nice to meet new people that are going through all the same things and a chance to off load and have a nice coffee, feel almost human again lol it is hard being such a demanding roll sometimes but I found in these playgroups and mum groups that I’m not alone in this. You got this mumma :heart:


Hang in there. I was offered the opportunity to return to work after our two sons were born but so happy that we were able to see the way for me to remain home with them. Being able to have activities coordinated and items ready for when daddy got home from work allowed more family time or off on another adventure.
You must make time for adult activities with or without your husband. Since you are not into play groups try Mother’s Day out programs run by local churches… Our boys looked forward to their time with their teenage sitters.

I am a sahm also, I left my full time job while I was pregnant with my 2nd also. I have gotten a part time job before just so I had social interaction with adults. But it seems to be normal. I am in kearney, not sure where you are located but could do a play date or meet to hang out if your close.

Young mothers are so lucky these days with all the groups etc. Try being all alone on a remote rural property with only the animals and your children to keep you company. I found solace in the animals and still do today in my most senior years, dogs chooks and native birds and other animals. Often wish I had some time to myself cos it’s a constant feeding programme, always feedtime it seems. But I love it. Xx


I’ve been a SAHM for just over 3 years now and tbh some days are full with play date or visiting family and some are spent cleaning or chillin at home. Find yourself a nice medium. Even getting out of the house and going to the shops/park for the morning to break up the routine is nice. Find a playgroup or some libraries do activities as well.

Look for an early childhood PTA.

Go to parks mingle. All tot moms can relate one way or another. End with jokingly “see you again next week” if the conversation went well. Boom new friendship.

I feel the loneliness often. But this help make a few new friend. I also slowly been finding peace in hanging with my tot. It’s hard to always speak to a child. But he gets me more than anyone else ever will and he has the same mind as mind. He is my absolute best friend.

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I think being lonely is expected after working full time . As others have said , look for pre school group . Check your libraries in the area for programs also surprisingly I found a preschool music group at a cafe in my area . I think once you find things you’ll feel a lot less lonely and probably a lot more tired lol !

Maybe join a playgroup and make new friends with kids the same age, im sure theres also mothers groups in your area to join, they have planned mornings out like meeting for brekky etc, check your local community centre they usually have things on their clipboard

Some of the Churches run play/help groups for mums & litilies.

Find other moms in your area to have a designated play day with!

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Join a moms club. People don’t realize how hard it is to be a stay-at-home mom. There’s very little appreciation out there like there is in a job.

It can be down right donting!
Take time for yourself, take interest in your child, there is so much you can do to help prepare him or her for the coming years!
Do whatever you can to make new friends, maybe among other moms whose children are the same age as your child. This will help your child as well as your social life.

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I would look for a playgroup or something like that so you get to meet mums with kids around the same age as yours

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Become A bus driver, you can take your kids on the bus with you!

Go back to work as being a home mum is not for everyone including me

I am always feeling that way! My daughter and I occupy our time with crafts and going to the library and planning out a bucket list of things to do together

Sounds about right, is there a kinder gym in your area or other kid of mums group

In my personal opinion if you have baby #2 on the way, just like me btw, giving up a career was Definitely not a smart choice. You also wouldn’t be so lonely. Idk js.


It’s really hard to find balance … sahm mums want to get out and working mums wish thy could be home with their kids … Perhaps find a way to work part-time . To get the balance

Find activities to get involved with for your own insanity.

SAHM for 10 years:) enjoy and have fun!

Yes…it is a privilege to be a sahm… as you call it. I was too.
Sorry…you will face misunderstanding &/or jealously.
I faced a new country, children starting c&k and not knowing anyone.
I joined a gym…with classes and keep in contact today (14yrs later). Find something you love and join a group

Get a lover to keep you company while your husband works


It’s his fault for choosing to be a provider for you and is too tried to show any interest in your or family life. Don’t let your needs be pushed aside

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I was a stay at home mom for just over 4 years. Loneliest I’ve ever been. I just started a job part time and I’m already starting to feel so much better.

Make time for you. Not you and your kids but you! You need to that time. Even if it’s a bath, alone to unwind. Lots of people think being home all day is easy. It’s not. It’s lonely and stressful. Plus you lose yourself and become this person who runs on empty to make sure your family is taken care of. But who cares for you if you don’t? Play dates are great. But you still need you time. I will go sit in a parking lot and play on my phone or watch a show on my phone if I really just need to have time without someone needing my full attention. Let’s face it, how many of us even go to the bathroom in peace? My kids will come to me for everything no matter what I’m doing, and dad will be sitting on the couch “resting his eyes” lol I don’t know how many times I have to remind my kids and others members of my family that come to visit that I’m not the only parent who is capable of making a drink or opening the dang box/bag. Lol I was outside yesterday working on my horse trailer and my uncle brought my daughter to me, he needed to leave and she didn’t want him to go, all while dad was resting in the house! Again, dad is inside doing nothing, I’m not her only parent. Hand her to him. Don’t get me wrong he helps a lot but It’s so frustrating. So make sure you don’t let it get that far or you’ll be finding yourself struggling more. 10 years here and I take blame for never putting my foot down sooner with demanding help and me time. Remember just because you’re a mom now doesn’t mean you throw who you are and what you love doing completely away. You’re still a person, with feelings and things you like, don’t lose that. You will regret it. Find a good therapist too. Don’t like the one you have after going a few times, find another until you click and they get you. Mine was the best. She helped me out of a really dark time in my loneliness. We are so much alike and have the same love for horses. Don’t be ashamed. You need a outlet to be a better you, for your kids. Good luck mama! Always remember you are important too and your feeling are valid no matter who tries to shut them down. :purple_heart:

I’m right there with you, with baby number 2 on the way in December. Your. Not. Alone :heart:

There’s an app called peanuts to meet other mums, start penpalling there are loads of groups on fb

Join some mommy groups in your area! Or maybe a play group for toddlers.

Find a play group make new friends. It’s perfectly normal to feel that way. Just an adult convo!

Its normal. I went from working 2 3 jobs to being a stay at home mom my fiance owns and operates his own business. Being home with the kids is exhausting I don’t really have friends. But its okay. My little ones make me smile. And my fiance gives me a break when he gets home. Hell have the older boys go do something to give me peace of mind. And hell take the baby and what not. Let me do whatever it is I gotta do.

take your child to the park or local library to meet some mommy and kid friends .

My advice…get comfortable…what I mean is get to know urself why u feel lonely besides the obvious get comfortable being alone with the kids…being home can be fun make it so even for urself do what u like with the kids teach them the things u like to do u have mini friends built in yeah u got to parent to but make it fun it’s more work when it’s just u and them but it’s worth it…u dont need others to be u…focus on urself them kids and ur family.


Totally normal. I have been at it for almost 10 years and there are still ups and downs. I have 4 kids though oldest 9.5 and youngest just turned 4 so they are close together. I am not from the town I live in so didn’t know anyone and didn’t really start making friends until my son started preschool. I also discovered play groups in the area at local libraries, story times, MOPS. You won’t met new people if you don’t go looking! It is definitely good to get out of the house. If you have anyone that can babysit make sure you get date nights. Find time for you too…a bath alone at night, reading a book in the morning before the kids get up, just small moments can make a difference. I’m not gonna lie…I wear pajamas/leggings A LOT, but it can definitely help give you a boost just to shower and get dressed, put on some make up or whatever even if you’re not going anywhere. I do my nails and it makes me feel more put together.
Talk to your husband and don’t stop talking to him. He won’t understand why you’re feeling lonely, overwhelmed, exhausted etc because he just sees you getting to stay home all day when it really is NOT that simple…don’t stop trying to communicate it to him. If they never do it then they don’t get it. Tell him what you need and ask him for help when you need it. I’m not saying all guys…but a lot of them won’t do things on their own simply because it doesn’t occur to them. They aren’t trying to ignore the messes or you, their brain just literally does not see you trying to do 3 things at once while having a person clinging to your leg or whatever the situation may be. ASK FOR HELP! Good luck Mama!

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Find a group of other moms going through the same thing! I just found a group of moms on Facebook that meet up weekly :smiling_face_with_three_hearts:

I often felt this way when I was a SAHM with my daughter, but I was also in a rough relationship with her father which didn’t help. My daughter joined a neighborhood play group for toddlers, and I was able to have “adult conversation” with other parents a few days a week, and that did help.

It is totally normal to feel that way. I am a stay at home mom as well.

Be very blessed you get to be a stay at home mom, not everyone can be. I knew spoiled ass moms who husbands did not and without husbands knowing dropped kids off at places like KinderCare so they could sit at home with other moms who did the same so they could drink and go to the mall and go on outings together…my friend asked me to join her group and when I took my 2 kids with me they asked me to take my kids to daycare! The nerve of these ladies. I went home of course. It was so awkward. I drove away thinking how could they not love thier kids? I was alone in the state I lived in with no real family. When I felt like I needed other adult human interaction I got 4hr 3or4 day a week jobs…kids are so much important to teach the intimate family unit. Yes it was lonely sometimes but you will live though it…enjoy napping, watching cartoons, craft making, ingredients getting for dinner etc.

Throw a coffee brunch and invite all your friends. Why sit around being miserable? Sending hugs

Get a job or a hobby…poor mama…pls.

Put the older one in daycare a day or two a week to meet other moms with the same age kids, work up to play dates, maybe meeting at a local park.

Find homeschooling families near you.

Find groups for play dates or start one up

There are so many support groups you can be a part of. MOPS, Mother’s of preschoolers, and so many others. Find a grip and connect with other parents too find joy in your everyday