I am about to give birth and fear I will not be attached to baby: Advice?

Let me start by saying my husband and I got married almost a year ago, and shortly after, I wanted a baby. He and I have kids from previous marriages, so reluctantly, he was nervous about adding to the family. I was a little hurt by the idea that he didn’t eagerly want a baby too. At the beginning of our relationship, he explained he wouldn’t mind having more kids. Anyway, I sorta excepted the idea that he wasn’t on board and told him I thought we should get permanent contraception (mind you, we were off of birth control for five months)… within weeks of this conversation, I was pregnant. At first, I was very excited, and he was as well, but now I’m seriously stressed about having a baby and not excited. I thought once I start showing, It’ll change…7 months later, nothing changed. I recently lost my Dad 3 weeks ago; now, it seems like even the thought of having this baby is just heartbreaking because he was the absolute best grandpa. I just feel so sad, I know it is affecting me and my emotions, but it seems my lack of wanting to be a new mom to a new baby is even worse. I’m a few weeks away from giving birth, and I’m terrified of not being attached or even wanting this child. Mind you; my husband is so loving and supportive. I really don’t know what’s happening to me or why I’m feeling this way. If you have gone through this or can think of ways to help me get excited, send advice!

That sounds tough to deal with. There’s a lot going on so make sure to just breathe. I will leave you with this: it is perfectly NORMAL not to be immediately attached to your baby. I know we see a lot of tv, movies, and friends go over the moon over their baby immediately, but the reverse also happens. Most women don’t speak of it because they’re ashamed or believe something is wrong with them.

Some parents bond instantly and some parents like to get to know their new person first. Both are normal and healthy.

But always, in both instances, keep pre and post partum depression in mind.