I am fostering a baby who's mother did drugs the whole pregnancy: Advice?

Have any of you ladies experienced a baby being born addicted to drugs? My cousin is having a baby in February, and my husband and I have agreed to foster the baby. The mother has been actively using drugs for the whole pregnancy. (Heroin and meth) I just want to hear any stories that you have to share on the subject. Thanks!

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Feel free to message me. My baby was adopted but I cannot share stuff publicly.

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How does this work? Is she still using? Is she in care until baby is born? Is baby being monitored in utero?

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I know a mum who did a lot of drugs during pregnancy, her son came out mentally challenged … :disappointed: so sad I hope this baby will be ok

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My nephew. He cried alot more than my baby. Constantly inconsolable. It was really sad.

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I don’t have stories! But what a wonderful, selfless thing to do! :heart:

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Just be prepared for withdrawal. It’s awful to watch. That high pitch scream they make is unbearable at times. I don’t have a child that has been exposed during pregnancy. One of my children had his first surgery at 25 hours old. He had to withdrawal from morphine. This was my experience

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I cared for a baby that was born addicted to drugs at a daycare. The worst part was if she wasn’t held ALL. THE. TIME. she would cry. And not a normal cry but a heart wrenching high pitched screaming cry. And in daycare you can’t just sit and hold one baby all day. She also had other problems (obviously) but the heart breaking cry was the worst.

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I did it was hard ,but doable, similar to hyperactivity

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Dont they medicate the baby until he or she is fully weaned off the meds?

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So nice and selfless of you to foster. That baby will learn love from you💕

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Baby will scream lots, sweat and feel nauseated while he/she withdraws from the drugs

I dont have any experience in this matter, but I have heard that kangaroo care (wearing baby close to you, on your chest) helps with withdrawal symptoms and anxiety. Plus it’s awesome for bonding. Look into kangaroo care. I’m sorry the mother decided to make those selfish choices during pregnancy.

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My aunt adopted a little girl whose mother also did drugs and drank while she was pregnant. Physically she is fine but mentally she has a mild case of autism that they say comes from the drug abuse. She also has signs of fetal alcohol syndrome which has carried on into her young childhood however with time and patience she is excelling as any other could would she’s just slightly delayed and has some severe separation anxiety. Typically she is OK around the family and environments which are comfortable for her like school but unfamiliar situations and strangers can be tricky at 1st.

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Be prepared for heart defects, developmental delays, and lots and lots of services needed. Therapies from the start.
In some cases, growth hormones are part of those therapies.

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The baby will most likely spend days to weeks (even months depending on the baby) in the NICU on morphine to help with withdrawals and slowly weaned until he/she can be completely off the meds. I am a NICU nurse. If you like to know more information or have questions feel free to message me.

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They cry alot…and more then likely be in the hospital up to 3 mths

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Be prepared for patience. Baby will be very fussy and stuff. Very stressful but just know he dont mean it and had no say so in the matter. These situations are so sad to hear and see. Prayers. God bless you

Fostering or adopting? Get her to sign away her parental rights if you want that child to have a chance.

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Yes I had a family member baby who had a similar situation. She cried alot more and shaked.

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Skin to skin all the time, like get a boba wrap and just let baby be on you as much as possible, I’ve read some really really great articles about nurses and volunteers doing that for addicted babies and it helps them thrive so much. Side note, if the baby is born a few weeks after my son (due February 16th but measuring almost 2 weeks ahead) I’d be very happy to donate breast milk if you’re interested, idk if it’d help with the drug addiction but it couldn’t hurt

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I would see if the hospital would help the baby with withdrawals before releasing him or her. Its gonna be a rough couple of weeks. Thank god the baby has you and i pray they charge her

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Been here, patience and lots of love…

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You are heaven sent to do this for that baby. :purple_heart:

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They will literally go through a detox when they are born. They will be fussy. Keep up with appointments to make sure milestones are being met and if any intervention is needed.

The baby will cry alot and literally shake.

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That is so sad!!! Poor baby :cry:. I don’t have any advice but bless you for taking on all the responsibility of raising a child that is going through that.

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Adults have a very hard time with withdrawals imagine a baby not being able to get a fix just to feel “normal”For the baby’s sake I hope it gets to go through detox in the NICU like the nurse mentioned previously. Good luck to you and your husband and practice patience it will be key in your journey :kissing_heart:

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Use a tula type carrier a lot for as much skin to skin contact as possible

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Start researching your states birth-3yr program and ask if/when the baby can be evaluated for services like OT, PT, and speech. Be patient. Get connected to local resources, look up support groups and your states developmental disability council or similar. However this child is, is wonderful. Things may be hard but that’s ok. Accept him however he may be, whatever struggles he may have. Things may not be perfect and he may not be perfectly healthy but THAT IS OK.

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God bless you and your husband for taking care of this sweet little bundle. Do the best you can. Im shur they well give you some help after you bring baby home. Im not trying to be mean but try not to get to attached to baby the mother could clean up her act. Or CPS could put baby up for adoption. They even may give you and your husband that option frist. Anyway I wish yall the best.

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I’d expect them to be fussy so a good baby carrier. I used lillebaby because my baby is super clingy and fussy. Boboa carrier for about a month, them bought a lillebaby and that was much more comfortable. It has a nice back support and they are super cute. I hear tula carriers are awesome too, haven’t tried one though. I love my lillebaby. Shes almost 2 years and we still use it

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My stepson was a drug baby and i used to cry with him because he would shake and cry all the time and he spent 6 months in nicu for mutipul things from the drugs in his system to under developed organs due to the drugs and being a preme its so heartbraking seeing them so tinny in a glass box suffering becausr the woman carying them was a selfish bitch ( my situation anyways)

I worked in two different facilities that had them. They need lots of cuddles, and a very calm adult who can keep their cool. Babies sense your stress so if you’re even a little stressed it will make it harder for them to calm down. They often need physical therapy, and or therapy for eating depending on how badly damaged they are. It’s very sad, and will be hard on your emotions but it’s the most rewarding job knowing you helped them get through something so terrible!

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My sister was born addicted to both, and had fetal alcohol syndrome. I was about 11 when we adopted her, and there was a lot of screaming. My parents had a counselor come in and talk with us and I remember them saying it was ok if she cried and teaching my mom to sit her on the hallway floor (it was narrow) and just sit next to her and talk to her. It was horrible for my mom, she would cry and cry and the baby would cry and cry. But it eventually passed by the time she was a couple months old and everything from there on out was pretty normal developmentally. I also worked in the NICU, where this baby will most likely go for treatment, and now believe it’s important for kangaroo care, a safe swaddle, baby wearing, singing, talking and any comfort/interaction they can get. The babies who have that usually fared better health and growth wise. Take all resources available to you, including those for yourself. The one thing I used to wonder before I had kids and even a while after having them, is why did my mom do that to herself? But talking with NICU parents, watching my sister grow up, its now no brainer to me- even on the worst most horrible days- it was WORTH it to her, and all of the others I’ve met. You are going down a very brave and courageous path and this will change this baby’s life forever, for the better, and for that? I just wanted to let you know you’re a superhero and how lucky this baby is to be loved so much already. Thank you.

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Breastmilk over formula give him the best fighting chance they have fb pages Human Milk for Human donations where you can seek donations

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Just an FYI children aren’t born addicted they’re born dependent there’s a difference

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My son’s story is very similar to this. I adopted him at birth. He is my angel. I’m not going to tell you that there are no side effects, because there are, but it he is worth it. He has severe separation anxiety, cried more than the average baby, and has sleep disorder, and can’t self soothe, just to name a few…but he is learning, growing, and overcoming daily.

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Skin to skin as much as possible. I’m praying for the baby and you’ll

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The baby will probably be in the NICU for awhile if it survives. :broken_heart::disappointed_relieved:

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I have a foster girl 21 months old now who was born addicted to drugs as well,the mother was on drugs the whole time as well, heavily… we’ve had her since birth. So far everything has been good :sparkling_heart: hit every milestone either early or right on time. A little speech delayed but we are working on it. :sparkling_heart: we plan to adopt her. :sparkling_heart:

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My aunt adopted a baby who was born addicted to drugs. He has to be on medicine every day for the rest of his life. If he doesnt take it for a day or two he starts shaking from the withdraws.

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I hope the mom also gets the help she needs.

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Our niece was born addicted to drugs, her mother was doing heroin when she was pregnant. The baby ended up getting taken from her a year later due to neglect and child abuse and she was placed in our care, the only thing weve noticed is that shes extremely hyper and when you tell her something she cannot focus on you shes thinking about something else. Shes also has constipation pretty bad and has to be on medication for it. She will be 2 in February. My little girl is 6 months older than her and shes really helped her learn alot.

My daughters sister was born addicted. The mother did drugs the whole pregnancy and was born with a cleft palate.

I was a fostered baby that got adopted by the family. Best of luck!

Those babies are rough. My biological mother was an alcoholic and drug addict when she was pregnant with me. Best thing that happened to me was being taken from her and put into a family that actually cared.

Babies like me who are born addicted and go thru severe withdrawals are not happy or easy. We’re not your typical “oh it’s colic” or “switch formulas” babies. We scream for hours. We keep you up all day and all night. We scare the living crap out of you because of the ways we act/respond. First things first would be to go to the hospitals and volunteer to hold drug exposed and addicted babies in the nursery so you can get a feel for what it will be like. Sometimes you just can’t soothe them. You don’t have much time to get your feet wet but I would definitely see if you can help with drug exposed newborns at the hospitals. Sometimes you can find a baby that’s similar, either with the addiction of the mother or the amount of withdrawals they can have and how severe they are. I would not jump head first tho. My adoptive parents had 30+ years of experience with medically fragile/addicted foster babies before they got me. And I have been one of their biggest challenges not only as a child but even now as an adult thanks to all the other issues that the drugs and drinking caused prior to my birth.

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So this is how its going to be; they usually keep the baby in the hospital for 3-4 months to slowly cut the drugs out.

The baby will scream all the time until this is done.

Now you have to remember that baby needs a reason to live and know they have someone waiting for them.

Visitations and love!

In the future you will have to get him or her tested because it can affect there brain/etc

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literally i just scrolled and read as much as i could. then they might thank your talking to someone else

They cry non stop so be prepared for that too.

There’s a scoring system. I suggest you look it up. Its very helpful to.know. they will not let the baby out of the hospital until they think she/he is ready. Let them.help as much as possible and hold that little baby as much as you can. They’re going through a lot, good luck.

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Yes my step daughter was the same she is now 5 and has fetal alcohol and drug syndrome and intellectual disabitility she is a hand full and hard to deal with

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My cousin adopted 3 children. They were all born addicted. It’s hard to say, what battles that baby will face once its here. My cousins daughter has it the worst. She has nightmares. She also has like a temper tantrum. But it’s not a temper tantrum. She just doesn’t know how to cope.

It’s a life long battle. These babies born addicted can easily grow into a teen or adult addicted.

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yes most of my babies i fostered were addicted to drugs, i use to swaddle them tight, and rock them a lot some it took months for the shakes to go away

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I’ve never personally been in this situation to know a whole lot, but I do know the baby may be born prematurely. I also know(depending on how much heroin she’s using) the child will experience withdrawal symptoms. The hospital will keep him or her until they see the child is stable enough to go home. As I can imagine, the little one will have it rough. There will be days she/he will cry inconsolably or not want to sleep. My best advice is love that sweet baby even harder on those days. Remember, this child has been living dependent on a substance it’s no longer receiving. Could you imagine how hard that would be? I just want to say thank you so much for giving this child a fighting chance. You’re so selfless to take this child in. I can only imagine how nervous you may be, but as you see him/her grow, learn, and experience new things, it’ll be well worth it. Much love sent your way, momma​:heart::two_hearts:

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This is heartbreaking reading these comments :pensive:

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It’s really hard to say what to expect because every baby is different. Some may be fine and others may have severe withdrawal/disabilities. If you want to get a visual on what to possibly expect, you can go on you tube to view video clip of babies going through withdrawal. Be prepared to cry though because it’s really upsetting. Good luck.

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Thank you for doing what you are doing. I have a baby carrier I would like to donate to you

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They will detox the baby in the NICU after birth. You won’t be sent home with a baby in withdrawal. I would be prepared for developmental and behavioral problems as the baby grows. Sometimes they do great and sometimes they have struggles.

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I was addicted to opiates and didn’t know I was pregnant until 20 weeks; then I went on subutex but my baby had mild withdrawals only in the hospital. They will give the baby morphine and usually won’t let baby leave until she is ok

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Wowwww this breaks my heart … you and your husband sound amazing. Raising a child/children is difficult as is so i couldn’t even begin to imagine all the challenges you may face. I wish yous the very best :heart:

Lots of swaddling and cuddles definitely though

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Idk if they’ll let you take the baby home even after it’s weaned off the drugs. CPS will be involved.

I’d meet with a ped doctor now,and a social worker.They can help you learn.And help you find a support group also.Above all else just love the baby.God bless you and your husband,and mostly that sweet baby.I’m praying for all of you,your cousin included.

Ugh :broken_heart: be prepared for a lot of crying and heartbreak on yours and babies end

My child had NAS and depending on how heavily she used is going to depend on the withdrawls. The meth isnt a worry, but the heroin is for possible withdrawl. Depending on where u live and what resources there are id look into a doctor who specializes in infant withdrawl and take this baby to them to assess. Hopefully it will only be minor and u guys can tough it out but if not then the child will need to be weind thru with a morphine equilavant or w.e they use where u are.
Some obvious signs of withdrawl would be high pitch crying, fatigue, weightloss insted of gain, trouble eating and sleeping, sometimes shakes. ( thats all i recall for withdrawls atm sorry)
After u get thru it tho the child will be fine i can promis u that. The first week to month of withdrawl will be the hardest. Feel free to msg me for any questions or suppourt tho. Its tricky but u can do it! Just takes some extra love and patience <3

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My Mom did foster care for a baby on meth and heroin.

She had spells of not wanting to breathe and on a heart monitor bc of it.

It’s very sad to watch the babies come off these hard drugs

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Colin Hawes you would know how to help

Try to relax. I adopted my niece at birth and her mom struggled with meth the first 5 months before she found out she was pregnant. Thanking the lord above that she is perfect, happy, and thriving. Ours was clean by time she was born, but the pediatricians will be watching that baby like a hawk and keep longer just to make sure baby is okay.

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Just here to wish you and baby well. Bless you for having a heart big enough to face this. May your reward be great. Nothing beats the bond of a child and caregiver.

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I nursed many babies who were withdrawing from drugs mums used while pregnant. They won’t allow the baby to leave the hospital until they have fully detoxed. Over 20 years ago we used morphine to detox babies not sure if this is the case these days. They really do struggle, shivering, sweating, crying etc but they do it slowly so should be manageable within the hospital system.

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Be prepared for CPS to be involved, they might not even let you take the baby. Once the baby is born the hospital will call CPS. I hope the baby does get to stay with family though and have a loving home.

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Wow sorry to say but what a heartless bishhh … I’m happy that u will have the baby. And I’ll pray that he/she will make it thru

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You. Are. Amazing. :heart::heart::heart:

The hospital won’t semd you home with baby until baby is ok. Bub will detox in hospital.
How bloody awful :sob::sob::sob::broken_heart:

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There are no proven after effects for babies born to mothers with meth addiction… Heroin on the other hand, there will be withdrawal symptoms. Depending on the usage, minimum effects may include alot of sneezing, discomfort, restlessness… Good luck.

Comfort swaddle and hold her you guys are great people prayers for the little one and you guys to

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I had an ex that was born addicted and the woman that cared for him said he would bang his head on things and cry until he was nearly 2 years old! There were definitely long term issues also!! Best of luck hun!

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Prayers for you and baby on this journey.

Best advice is look at other services that deal with baby’s from drug addiction mother have a chat with them

Too any and all: yes, meth is terrible. But heroin is meth x 1000

As a nurse in the M/B unit. The withdrawals these baby goes thru are horrible. But over the yrs they will not release the baby until they are over with them… These babies usually now go to the NICU & again, stay there until the withdrawals are done. So I can’t imagine you getting the baby until they are free of these, No breathing problem, stable temps & eating well & no seizures, (or on seizure medication & no active ones) all this has to be done before they are discharge to you. But they still need to see a pediatrician as soon as possible The hospital will give you all the baby’s records. I do personal know 2 family members who were drug addicts when they got pregnant with their babies & now those babies are in college on the honor roll. So the environment these babies live in does play a big factor on these babies lives.

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You might/will have a detox period. Its not going to be easy. The baby will do it at the NICU. They will give morphine to help. So visit as much as you can.
Buy tons of different swaddles (it will help with the shakes) & buy a wrap carrier & other baby carriers. The baby is going to want to be held a ton. I recommend the wrap that way baby is snug. I also recommend don’t wear shirts or bras when holding her (skin to skin is going to help so much!), hence the wrap carrier.
Watch everything the baby does. Baby could stop breathing, stop eating, heart could crash. So get a journal & summarize the day. (Plus it makes a good keepsake for the baby so they know their birth/baby hood for when they’re older).
Most important enjoy it! Just one good hour or day makes a ton of difference! The baby needs love & care the most. You got this!

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I foster my nephew who is now 2.5 and we got him out of the NICU when he was 28 days old. They had him on morphine for withdrawn it was horrible to watch. He had every symptom of withdrawn you could think of and would cry for hours and hours no matter what you did for him. This went on for weeks after he was discharged and was very ruff to handle and watch him go thru. He is now 2.5 and I can still remember those days/nights and honestly don’t know how we got thru it but we did. He now has many health issues and behavior issues likely associated from the drug use and he can be very hard to handle. My advice for you would be to make sure you can do this its not going to be easy and be honest with yourself. Make Sure you have a great support system and be prepared for DHS to be in your life they are not going to just let you leave with the baby the hospital has to notify DHS and then mom would have to let them know you will be willing to take the baby. You will have to become Foster parents take classes and commit to every thing that goes along with that. You have to have background checks, home checks so there is a lot that needs to be done. We were able to have the kids placed with us and do all this while they were with us because we were considered emergency Kinship foster. You may want to call you local DHS office and find out what you need before hand to be prepared. Good luck it is a great thing you will be doing.

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I have two babies that we’re born with drugs in system but are perfectly fine now beautiful and healthy

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Be sure hospital knows they can help the baby. But be ready for ahakes and scrwmaing and crying

Awe poor baby. Bring baby here I’ll help :frowning: I got breast feeding boobies . I’d do anything to help . And I know breast milk is good for baby’s in pain or unwell :frowning: <3

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Get all the rest you can, cause your not going to get much when the baby gets here, I hope you have a good support team…when the baby sleep please sleep,

The hospital will keep the baby till the baby is weaned off its takes months.

These comments break my heart! You and your husband are amazing people taking this on. It will be a rough road. Give love, love, love!! Good luck to you and this baby!

Expect NICU time for detoxing little bubs. Every child is different and affects on each child is different but positive mainframe and nothing but love and support and youl be ok

February? She needs to detox now so the baby won’t be born with it

My cousin Chasity who I lost contact with was adopted my aunt snd uncle had no idea she was born into drugs until she stopped breathing and her first night at the er they thought she was just fussy and colic they never reported the mother of doing drugs and she was on a heart monitor for almost the first year of her life things do get easier and the unconditional love youll fall head over heels for good luck

Hi, while the little one you are going to support has been through the most dangerous time in their lives to-date, the next few years are crucial to assisting the then to develop in a safe and healthy manner. My suggestions as a professional in the field is to use three main things. 1. Seek Professional support. 2. Understanding of trauma and how it causes the brain to maladapt. 3. Prepare yourself to respond differently to anything you have ever done previously.

  1. Seek advice from professionals who specialise in brain development. My suggestion are to seek out support from the leader in neuroscience being Dr Bruce Perry. His writings around how the brain develops after experiencing trauma while in the womb is essential. He uses a Nero sequential model of therapeutics, which maps the child’s brain through their development.
  2. Trauma training - open your self to any training on trauma. Dr Eric Ericsson 1959 has excellent writings around a trauma guide. Dr Daniel Hughes around Dyadic developmental psychotherapy and attachment theory. Dr Bessel van der Kolk on how the body keeps score is an excellent book. Any trauma and attachment training will assist.
  3. Be prepared to explore out your own childhood and understand what happened to your throughout your upbringing. This will assist you in being able to seperate your own personal needs from the child’s as they seek your attention in unusual ways. This will allow you to be mindful and be responsive to the child by separating your stuff from the child. You will need to get help to process your stuff so that you remain available and safe for the child to develop safety. Hope this helps. Colin Hawes
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I have no advice but I’m praying for that baby, you guys & the mama :cry::heart:

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My oldest daughter who I adopted was… unfortunately she passed away at 2 month…jus hold her and love her

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From what I know of and don’t quote me on it but they test the baby and if the baby is positive for those the baby will stay in the hospital some until they are fully clear and or just a few days but idk ur whole back story but you should get more info on the nurses and doctor that will be assisting her when she has the baby. Maybe if u can go to the next appointment with her

Prayers for you and baby. Every story is different. It’s going to be hard but with faith and trust in God you can do it.

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Because i went into labor early, i was on something to keep help stop the contractions. Didn’t help. My lil one was born addicted to it. She cried all the time. It was so hard. It took about 6 months before she stopped. But then her temper was out of whack. That stopped at about 3. The only thing advice on my end, patients.

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I fostered a baby who was born addicted to crack. It was very hard. And the baby was excessively whiney. It takes a lot of patience. Unfortunately with heroin and meth, that baby will probably be in the NICU for a while, until it fully detox’s. Good luck, it’s a beautiful thing you both are doing :blue_heart:

Being a child born on drugs and studying to work in the field. Get ready for nicu likely they will have to detox the baby. Restless nights crying randomly anger issues esp. While older. Just dont blame the baby it’s going to be rough it can cause chance of mental issues learning disabilities

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Need to seek nurses help on this because the baby will have withdrawals.

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