Your maid of honor is the one giving you a shower. But come on you have 2 kids already and a household I would assume no bridal or Bachelorette party is needed
Feel this 
so sorry. I plan everything. A big reason why we decided to cancel our wedding and reception and went to las vegas instead and got married with our 2 kids and my sister 
Quit expecting things …life isn’t so cut n dry …if you know what type of ppl are around you, as you said it wasn’t the first time you have been disappointed…well if u don’t expect it then when it happens it’s a blessing. And if your not happy with the way your friends and family make u feel unimportant then u need address that with them and find new ppl to surround yourself with .
Wow, some of these comments are super shitty, sure a bach party and what not isn’t necessary but a lot of people do them and it’s nice to feel appreciated, especially since this soon to be bride has made it clear that she would like one. I’d understand if her list of demands was long but it seems she would of been content with a nice dinner with the people she loved, just not her having to do it herself would of been enough and I get that.
It is inappropriate to throw yourself a shower