I am having trouble making mom friends: Advice?

So I have a three-year-old son. It’s starting to get cold outside, so we mostly stay home. I’ve tried making friends, and it seems like maybe I’m a little on the bubbly side. (don’t make fun) I get really excited when I meet another mom of a young boy or boys. I tend to talk fast and sometimes squeal when we have something in common. I have to seriously hold back and tell myself to be calm when I meet other moms. My husband travels for work, and I don’t get much adult interaction outside of my job. However, I’m not sure where to meet new people. We’ve lived here for roughly six months, and I’ve spoken to several moms but no friendships. Example: A mother was letting her son ride his bike while following behind. My son was super excited to see him, so they stopped and hung out for a while. We discussed the boy’s interests, behaviors, favorite characters, and so on. I asked if she lived nearby and she said yes. I told her they were welcome over anytime or maybe we could do a play date at the park she agreed that it would be fun. I never saw them again… I could use some advice.

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I have no advice really BUT I’d love to know who this is because it sounds just like me!! You sound like a wonderful person to be friends with!

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Sorry… but I avoid moms like you like the plague lol.

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Following because same ! Except I’m an introvert

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You sound super fun! I’m an introvert, so your bubbly personality does all the work and eases social anxiety. I wonder if that mom maybe lost your number or something, though I know it’s hard to give the benefit of the doubt. Keep trying, and look into church or mother’s of preschoolers groups. Wish I had a 3 year old so I could bump into you!

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I have severe add/adhd. Ppl just dont like me…

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The parks departments usually have activities going on for the littles, go to lots of them, & when you meet someone get their number & give yours, or at least connect by social media, then make the first move & initiate a play date at your house. Tell the mom we can netflix & chill, do kiddie & Mommy crafts, or do dinner prep kits together (prep big amounts of food, put in freezer containers to have at later dates).

I’m the exact same way. Have always had trouble, so no advice here.

Good luck!

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I’ll be your friend!!!

I’ll be your friend! We’re all quirky in our own unique wonderful ways!

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Always get people’s deets! And remember that you are not some special case! I think it’s safe to say most stay at home mums feel this way! If you know where she lives knock on her door at a reasonable time and ask if she wants to hang! It’s a two way street, stop waiting for them to come to you! You sound like a cool mom, wish I could be friends with you!

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I am the same way. I have word vomit everytime I have adult interactions. Being a sahm is hard. Most moms are really busy and dont have the energy to make time to make friends. Ive learned you have to be the initiator to start with in order to make mom friends. I would get the moms number and ask them to coffee on me and a play date. Then keep pushing them to come hangout. They will reliaze how valuable the friendship is and start to make time for it. I only know this because a good friend of mine did this for me and if she hadnt pushed me a little to be her friend I dont think I would of had the energy or made the effort to because I was dealing with so much already that the little bit of downtime I did get I just slept. Good luck momma! Good friends is a true blessing.

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I have no mom friends near me since we moved a year ago and I’m a SAHM. I have the same problem but I’m the opposite. I am so shy, quiet, and have social anxiety. Talkative people fill in the gaps and silence so it isn’t so bad.

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try toddler time at the library

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As a mother of four, I understand how you must feel, but don’t be so hard on yourself it’s only been six month’s. Continue to be who you are and the frievds you need will find you soon enough. All the best hun

I’m from New Hampshire if anyone needs a mom friend!

Try a mommy and me class

Where is the mammabear from?

I have this issue, but I’m the opposite. I’m more of an introvert whose shy and very socially awkward lol. I’ve found that joining mom groups on facebook has helped a ton.

Where are you located

Join local mommy groups on fb, I met my best friend on there and we’re both not from the town we live in and hit it off right away, her son and my son are best friends. I tend to want friends and then I get them and all kinds of drama takes places so I was iffy. So far it’s been smooth and drama free. Dont give up.

Try your Library! Most have a story hour.

Girl, it’s just life. Finding friends as an adult is a lot harder than when you were a kid. We can just run up to someone and ask, “Wanna play?” It’ll happen organically. I don’t have a large group of friends, but I have the friends that matter.

Download the app peanut. It’s like tinder for moms

Honestly we are all moms. Literally so easy u could walk up to any random mom almost and chit chat about anything. I know it’s hard making friends trust me. As long as u don’t talk over someone else and or don’t let them finish talking you should be good to just get out and mingle. That goes for most people traveling on bus or parks. Just be confident. But just do not go for the wrong kind of friends because they will take advantage of anyone

Where are you from ? I’ll be your mom friend ! I have a very similar attitude most of the time and have a 2 year old little boy also go to your public library and join groups in facebook it might help !

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Tone it down? Maybe you dominate the conversations and are too loud??

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I’m like you and have had problems making mo. Friends myself. Everything goes well we decide on hanging out n I never see or hear from them again

Start your own moms group. That’s what I did.

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Yeah where are you from, me and my boys are always up for play dates!

I used to get down about not having friends outside of work as well but I was so involved with my kids I learned it really didn’t matter much. Join a church and I’m sure you will find other moms to interact with and if you just start showing up at the park you’re bound to find someone to talk to but don’t worry about keeping your circle small.

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Give your contact info and Pursue the friendship. Find a neighborhood church and do some volunteering in a Sunday school class with your son. Invite some neighborhood ladies in for coffee and cake.

Well first of all it is soooo hard to make mom friends!!! I would love to get together though, I’m a bit awkward but also very lonely!:see_no_evil::weary:

Where are you from? Im so down to be friends Im the same way!!

I feel you! I don’t really have any mom friends and I feel guilty about it. But I just keep that little bit of hope cause I’m sure one day I’ll meet someone who wants to be friends. :woman_shrugging:t2: good luck

We moved to AL and it’s harder to make friends here. I work from home and my mom is my only friend I talk to or hang out so that can get annoying fast. Lol. I seen that you said your husband travels for work, but does he have any local friends? Usually they have a wife/girlfriend you could hang out with. If you like wine, have your husband watch the kids and do painting with a twist. I hear those are fun and hell, you get to drink in peace. Lol. There’s just different ways and it’s not always easy, but just try a few things and you never know who you’ll meet.

I understand that you have high energy and talk a mile a minute. But it can be a bit off putting when meeting and trying to connect with other moms with young children.

When you are in a setting like at the park or a kids birthday party or whatever, try to slow yourself down just a little and not overwhelm people or take up all the air in the room. Let them talk, listen and respond to what they are saying, not just the track in your head of things you’ve been saving up to talk about.

Keep it light and calm and positive and you are way more likely to have a second and third convo. People will respond much better and remember the experience as a positive one. So when it’s time to invite kids for your boy’s birthday or a play date or whatever, they will be more likely to accept.

Making mom friends is SOOOO hard. I’m a navy wife so my hubby is gone half the time and I haven’t made a single mom friend sense living here for over 3 years :grimacing::grimacing:

I usually just stay home and we keep to ourselves sometimes we will go to the park or something but we’ve never met anyone while we’re out.

I also have high anxiety and am very introverted so starting conversations is hard for me.
Maybe that was the girls issue is she’s just really nervous and doesn’t know how to reach out.

To be honest it may have to do with you being too enthusiastic but it’s more likely that mothers and people in general have such busy lives that it’s nearly impossible to make time to make new friends when you already have a schedule worked out.

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My biggest suggestion would be to join some type of mom play group function or meet mothers at church.

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Go to momsclub.org and find your local chapter. Changed this whole motherhood journey for me, for the better!

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Don’t tone yourself down for other people. You want friends that want to be around the real you!
It’s not always easy. I would check your area for church activities, local moms groups or even just little town events for kids. If you frequently go to those things you will eventually start to see familiar faces and make connections. Example: our local library has toddler story time twice a week. It’s a free event and the moms that go tend to go every week.
Good luck! Having friends with kids the same age has saved me from a lot of loneliness.

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I’m socially awkward🤷, so I definitely don’t have any mom friends :broken_heart:🤦. My kids are FOUR, TWO, & THREE WEEKS TODAY :smiling_face_with_three_hearts::heart_eyes:
If anyone wants to be my friend from the south Haven mi area let me know.

I’m actually pretty cool :sunglasses::sunglasses:

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Philly, here. I’m terrible at making friends, because energy. People think I don’t want to be friends because I don’t make the effort to make plans and do stuff, but like, I’m just trying to get through my day. Doesn’t mean I wouldn’t take on a friend who has the energy to make plans and pick us up and drag us out. Also my daughter is severely ADHD, recently diagnosed high functioning autistic, and she’s a lot in and of herself. Then I have a 7m old boy who is his own chore to take out. I need to meet someone energetic and outgoing, like the poster, who also loves annoying children. lol! I don’t even think that’s a thing. :joy:

Try the Peanut app! Have met a few good mom friends on there.

I would love to have been that mom. :wink: I think the way you were forward with your intent is amazing. I have very little mom friends because it’s difficult for me to say, “hey, you wanna be friends?” Haha You’re enthusiasm will more than likely help you gain those friendships!

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I used to follow mom pages on facebook from my local area and meet at the mall or beach or park. Sometimes even if it was to go for an hour walk. Volunteering helps too. Good luck!!

Well I would have asked to add her on your social media right then so you could have tried to talk about the play date. Or if you don’t have social media asked for her number. I doubt she meant anything by it. But I am with you it’s hard to make friends as an adult. People seem to really want to stick to their already former group of friends.

Meetup.com has mommy playdate groups

I just moved and don’t have many friends either. I’m a truck driver, and I spend more time in the state I work out of than the state I live in. So it’s hard to make friends. I just wanna meet other moms who like to drink coffee.

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Find fellow moms at libraries, church Sunday school/nursery, parks & playgrounds, recreation center programs like just hanging out at baby pools, strolling hiking trails, or enrolling in toddler swim/gymnastics/dance/whatever class; fire station open houses, and Mom’s Day Out programs to meet in person; online mom groups (like this one) to meet online.

To make friends with working moms, offer to do favors for them, like pick up their child from daycare (you’d need an extra child seat) when they can’t get there in time up to once a month, then offer to have their family join you for dinner once they get home. She should reciprocate by springing for pizza or buying you a meal at a mutually convenient time, or bringing a bottle of wine to a future play date.

Believe me you are not the only high energy mom out there. Find groups with similar interests and try that way. Then its not so forced

I’m a mom of a 4yr old (prek) and a 2yr old. with my only mom friends were my old high school friends but can only chat on FB due to not getting out much, or no ride. I’m kinda a loner tho lol. I talk more online then in real life, but that’s because I tell my emotions better by text then in voice. (I’ve been abusded in my past so drepression and trauma don’t go good together)

Don’t hold back! Be yourself, some people will love that about you. I’m socially awkward so I understand where you’re coming from. Luckily I have friends I’ve had for years that also have kids. I’d be screwed if I had to make new ones :joy: people tend to not like me :woman_shrugging: be yourself and you will be ok!