I am struggling to make friends: Just wanted to vent

Not a pity post; just wanted to put how I feel kinda post: So my kids and I moved to a different province a couple of months ago. Everything is going great, my kids made friends right away, fit into their new schools with ease, and they took the move good (we had it planned for months. my boyfriend works full time here, that’s why we moved here. We’ve known each other for years but have been dating for over a year now). Anyways, the last couple of days, I’ve been struggling a bit with making friends. My boyfriend goes out bike riding with friends; my kids do their things with their friends or whatever. But all I’ve been doing is working, house work, running errands, etc. I’ve been in tears the last couple of days because I’m jealous that everyone has friends or something to do.


Make friends when going to the grocery store or other errands you may run! I really don’t have friends but I work a lot and just surround my off time with my kids and grandkids

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Boyfriend should be helping do all of this for one.


Get to know the parents of your children’s friends.

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Maybe there’s a Facebook group for moms around you maybe look into community events for have park dates with your kids friends

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I understand where your coming from. My husband an I were raising our granddaughter she was in elementary school at the time. So I got involved with the PTO helping with school events an being a class grandma. I met some very nice women doing this. But outside of school events I couldnt seem to really connect with them.It was very disappointing. So I decided to be a volunteer at my church thrift store. I did manage to connect with a couple of ladies an we would get together for coffee. It was a very small town an the women were a bit stand offish. I came from NY the big city maybe they found me a little bit much. Anyway I settled for the church ladies an they were alot of comfort. Perhaps join a church group.

Go to like a wine paint night they are super fun and it’s a good opportunity to meet new people :wink: also they also have all kinds of group like this where you build stuff ect Facebook is a good way to find these groups also Groupon :blush:good luck and we have all been their don’t feel alone

Does your bf friends have girlfriends or wives maybe you can be friends with them. Me personally I enjoy my own company


Talk to everyone you come into contact with. You’ll find someone where the conversation flows and you have things in common and take it from there😊


Make time once a week.or something and join a hobby group

Are the kiddos in activities? Baseball, dance, soccer, swim etc? You can get to know the parents of the other kiddos there❤
Best of luck!


Can you ride a bike? (I can’t right now) . Invite his biking friends to stay for coffee or drinks, dessert, etc.


I joined clubs or whatnot at the library. Maybe look into something like that.

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Do you have any interests or want to take up a new hobbie. Look for local groups and start there x

I don’t have any friends that I go and hang with either. I’m so busy being a mom and fiancé that it doesn’t bother me as much. I quit being friends with my best friend over a month ago, we were friends for 15 years. It hurt but it was for the best.


If your a nice looking person sometimes it’s a trust issue with other women. Older women are more sure of themselves and their relationship with their partners. They will more likely be someone to befriend. Hang in there sounds like you are just in a trail period. Good luck


Your boyfriend (if he isn’t) needs to help you around the house when he is home. Not saying he shouldn’t have a social life outside of you but maybe suggest getting a baby sitter and taking you along one of the times he goes out with friends. More than likely one of them has a girl of their own you could possibly make friends with. Or again baby sitter and take you out himself and find friends together. I’m not exactly flowing with friends myself but that’s what I would suggest.

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I don’t have friends where I moved to either. Just work( which you can’t make friends at doing what I do) and take care of 4 kids. :woman_shrugging:t2:

try a book club, a girl’s club, if you are working outside your home, that is a great way to make friends, Volunteer. Bring your kids to their friends house & talk to their mothers, You must have neighbors, when you see them, say Hello…& go on from there

I was feeling that exact same way so I posted on two local mom sites and had such a crazy overwhelming response from momma’s who were lonely just like me! Do something crazy, reach out and I guarantee you’ll be surprised by what happens! :heart_eyes: P.s I meant Satan not satin haha

If you’re in NS, shoot me a message :slightly_smiling_face:

Do your boyfriend’s friends have significant others? If so, you could try getting to know them and making friends that way. You could also go on double dates with your boyfriend and these people. Also try getting to know the parents of your children’s friends. This may be an easier way to make friends as well.

It’s hard to make friends as a mom, but hang in there. Bad days happen. It will get better.

I totally know how you feel. We live in the US in Virginia. We moved from near Pittsburgh PA to Covington VA & I have no friends :sob: it does suck. I get how you feel. Not sure how to make friends. I’m a stay at home mom & really don’t go anywhere esp with the covid going on.

See if there is a community page for your area. New moms post in ours all the time looking for friends for both themselves and their kids. Good luck. :purple_heart:

Good luck, I moved to my current location there years ago and still have no friends :rofl::woman_shrugging::sob:

Maybe plan a night of family activities after dinner. Movie night or go camping on a weekend. Just you kids and your boyfriend.

friends will appear in good time. go to the movies by yourself. It is a treat to have your thoughts to yourself…

You can message me anytime! I need some mom friends too :weary::sweat_smile:

Join a Facebook Moms group page in your city/town and post something like this, “Hey y’all! I’m new. I live in the ______ area. I like to _____, ______ and ______. Anybody want to be friends?”

Playdates, your kids sports mom’s…

I don’t have any friends either. I lost all the “friends” I thought I had in my divorce. :disappointed:

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Are you saying you don’t want the peace of mind in you.

Doesn’t sound like your bf is very supportive. Has he invited you along on the bike rides, or invited his friends and their significant others to your placr so you could possibly meet them? If not, you might need to rethink your move…

making friends as an adult is one of the hardest things. is there a hobby you like maybe there is a group that meets

I am not the best at making friends, but I recently met some really cool people on our neighborhood FB group.
Best part is we all live close.
I’ve been in the group for a year & we all just started talking but it’s been worth it.
Best of luck to you! :slight_smile:

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I struggled for 2 years after moving to find a friend and still after 5 years feel a lack of close friends like I had before I moved. I do have a few people I can do stuff with but find my peace running alone.

It happened to me years ago. I found myself meeting friends from school, the kids. Getting involved with school events. I know that feeling give it time gang in.

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I know how you feel. The down side of a military spouse life. When you do make friends it’s time to PCS. (Military move to a new duty station). Hugs.

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Maybe get involved in area of volunteering you would enjoy. You would find like minded people there. Good luck to you. If nothing else volunteering would give you purpose, but I really think you would find deep friendships there.

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Have you found a church? If so, volunteer to help out…attend pot luck functions. Not interested? How about the school … Thanksgiving is coming up and Christmas…both are usually cause for extra curricular events that need moms to help with. Just ideas off the top of my head, but the plan is to involve yourself as much as you can in activities that include other women with similar interests.

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First, your boyfriend should ask if you want to join him for some riding. If not, that is okay. Try find a place to do volunteer work. Either at a church, hospital, SPCA, or the city library. Volunteer work can give you lots of things to do while making friends. Then once you made plenty, you can even ask your boyfriend to help as well. This might give both of you something to do together.


Go volunteer… food banks …libraries… you name it and what you choose to do… your hours and days… what’s your passion? Now you have something in common with some one else… right ?? But, commit… no slacking…


Sorry you feel alone dear. When your boyfriend is at work and the kids are at school go to a coffee shop or for a walk. Make the first move and reach out to people. Get a hobby. There must be something that you enjoy doing or that you allways wanted to do. Find out sbout social gatherings and community groups in your new town. Good luck dear.

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You all moved basically for him …so now he should help you…

Try an exercise class… I met a few real nice people at hot yoga…AND the relaxation and quiet head during the class was awesome also

It’s tough making friends as an adult. We moved about 6 years ago for my husbands work about 2 hours away. In that time we’ve made 1 friend each, a married couple. I’ve said hello to people at my kids sporting events and they look at me and then turn away. If you’re not from here, you suck apparently. It’s tough. I speak on the phone with my friends I’ve had for years and rarely see them. I don’t get to see my only friend here because she works crazy hours. We also live in the boonies so we have to drive 30 mins just to get groceries or to the school. I’d say maybe sign up for stuff and try that. Or possibly make friends with your husbands friends wives.

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Maybe get involved with some charity work, check if you have a church group nearby, neighbors you can introduce yourself to or maybe start riding with a group or women, or if his group is both men an women ride with them . It’s up to you to get involved an make new friends him not your children can’t do it for you. The longer you wait the tougher it will be an you can’t hold him an the kids being out an about against them or they will start feeling guilty an that in itself can cause problems

Im going through the same thing. We moved to a different city a year ago. Still have made any friends. I feel really alone as well.

I just retired after driving over the road for 6 years. We relocated 3 years ago so I barely knew my neighbors. I started walking 4-5 days a week with a couple of my neighbors. We go to dinner every couple of weeks with them. I have kids and grandkids so I visit them often. Sounds like you need a hobby that will get you in touch with other women. Quilting, walking, or crafts. Lots of places to tour. We try to see what’s available since I’m finally home.

I had the same thing when we moved cross country. But than i started to become friends with the parents of my kids friends, I got envolved with a local church in my town and help there with a lot of different things. I also became friends with some of my co workers and do stuff with them on weekends without the kids or spouses.
Just join local places to volunteer or become friends with the parents who your kids are hanging out with

Just a suggestion, find a good church, join a women’s bible study it can work wonders.


Take up a hobby or activity like the others… learn to ride a motorcycle, shooting, horseback riding not the loaner things like sewing, gardening and so on… join a bowling team. What do you like to do or would like to? Base jumping, sky diving, surfing… it is up to you to do

When we moved i introduced my self to all our new neighbors made a few good friends that way.

I have such social anxiety and been so hurt over the years. And taught from early age to not get close to no one. And I’m lonely

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My daughter also moved across the country and can’t seem to make friends. One good thing is all of her husband’s family lives there but she would still like her own friend’s. Your not alone! Do you have any hobbies? That could lead to some friendship’s! Good luck, they will come!

Get a dog they are execellent buddy and going for a walk you will meet others who have dogs​:heart::pray:t4:

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I feel ur pain. I moved in with my boyfriend a year ago and he has friends, lots of friends and none of them seem to want to get know me. All I do is sit at home and go to work.

Making friends is hard as an adult and mother. It’s hard to find people you mesh with. It takes time.


Join any type of group that is at all interesting to you, of course the pandemic affects everything. Even if the group meets virtually it will help. Have you found a Church yet, that is another possibility, or getting involved at the kids school. It’s ok to spend time alone but then read a book, do something you like Not housework.

Take a class something fun. Voleenteer at your child’s school. See if there is a neighborhood website so you can get ti know your neighbors

A church, school group, volunteering are excellent ways to get you out and mingle. Your boyfriend also needs to find things that can include you. After all, you sacrificed to be with him. Best of luck.

Volunteer somewhere. A food bank, a Library or a pet shelter.

Take an adult school class. I took a quilting class more than 40 yrs ago, after we “knew it all” we continued to meet weekly & have stayed in touch ever since. Plus I have 3 sisters & we play cards as often as we can.

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Nhi would suggest to get in touch with who you are, your secret dreams and desires or something you always wanted to do. Do you like music, join a choir or take lessons, do you like art. Do arts and crafts and possibly starting a small business. Attend free classes like at the library, etc. Put yourself in some type of group setting, where you might fell more comfortable. Most of all, be good to yourself. Take care of your needs
And find people where they might have something in common with you
Bring yourself out of your comfort zone a little and God bless you

Check out the library for events. Maybe a cooking class or craft class. Good way to meet people.

it seems like your boyfriend has a separate life from you, wouldnt it be more appropriate if you are a couple that your boyfriend would invite you and include you in his activities with his friends. introducing you to his life instead of excluding you leaving you to do your own thing???


Go knock on a neighbor’s door and ask if she can tell you more about the neighborhood.

If any of your boyfriends friends have wives or girlfriends maybe try doing something with them

Church is a good way to make family friends and one on one fri8.


Find a church who has a ladies group and join them.


Do some volunteer work. You will meet people that way and be helping a cause!!

Sorry you haven’t made friends. Since I am no longer I understand your feeling’

Volunteer at a senior center

Volunteer for a charity.

Go for walks, volunteer, meet your boyfriend friends.

Get to know his friends
and let them be your
friends too. You will find
the ones that you have
more in common with,
and be happier.

Introduce yourself to your kids friends parents

Your kids friends parents.

Go bike riding with your guy

Get a hobby or as someone else suggested volunteer. I’m not a person who likes making new friends but I’ve made some while attending exercise classes. I also volunteer and made friends that way. I can’t say you will have “friends” right away, but you will potentially find people to hang out with.

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Join social and service clubs, join a community church, go to libraries, gyms, volunteer at schools, or kids classes, help to organize events at your kids schools, take a crafts class or an art class. Go to the library, volunteer there, take a flower arranging class, help at a food bank or homeless center, volunteer at a zoo, they always need help. Invite your husbands work associates and their spouses or dates over for a bar b que, they can introduce you to people, start doing craft shows…making jewelry etc…take up photography, take a class in photography, volunteer at a nature center or a shelter, they always need help. Help at an animal rescue, they always need help. Volunteer at a Crisis Center, they always need help. I hope this helps…just get out do something.

There are bible study groups, PTA, book clubs, volunteer opportunities. There are also low cost adult classes at community colleges such as painting, ceramics, writing classes, etc. you could possibly start a group of your own. Start by checking at your children’s school and see if the can make any recommendations. I’ve yourself some time to actively pursue something of interest and you’ll make friends quickly.

You have to create your own “me time”. #1- you need to start assigning chores, nobody does anything until all chores done; get you a bike and find some sister to ride with or walk with you and join a church or local charity organization.

any church organizations that you could join? hi neighbor or hospital volunteer groups; become a school

Meet the parents of your kids friends join a group that that you are interested in

A friend in need is a pain indeed

Church, join a group, gym

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Do you have any hobbies? Or a passion? Maybe a favorite charity or outreach program? Take a class, volunteer, join a group. Do something you are interested in and you will find others who share your interests = potential friends

Volunteer. Join a church

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Communicate this to your boyfriend…

Church! It’s difficult we Covid but there are on-line services, bible studies and meetings. Saturday mornings Volunteer at a food bank. My churches have crochet /knitting groups to make mittens and hats for babies and homeless.

Felt the same when we moved to Quebec not an easy province to make friends,especially if you belong to the Armed Forces Circle, especially it’s army in there and we were Navy, and my in laws are from Quebec, that did not help one bit either.They are not friendly at all ,and we have been married for 53 yrs, have not seen any chances in that province at all. if you are talented with anything ,do a night craft, get to know your church people ,whatever it takes,it can be very depressing ,volunteer at school, very good place to start knowing people.

I moved to another country completely for my hubby’s job… different culture, different language (he’s native born), different everything. I had his family for support, but I didn’t really have friends until I started tutoring English. Then, relationships flourished with the kids parents, and other people who were looking for tutors. Do something constructive with your time, start with whatever you like to do and build on it.

We moved about 6 years ago too. Since we are church goers we found one we liked immediately. The people are so friendly & caring! They have been a lifesaver to us. I know we would have been very lonely without our church friends.

church first, volunteer a couple hours someplace where you will meet like people. for me, it was a library book club. another was walking my dog…lots of like people there!

There’s an app for that! I think it’s called patook or something, local people friends finder. Like tinder but for platonic friends only.

U got neighbors :: go knock on a door ::: Hi ::introduce yourself and go from there ::: to have a friend ::u have to be a friend ::::Take the first step ::: Good Luck

make friends with the mother’s of ur kids friends