Please help… I’m struggling so bad with my 2.5 year old. I can’t handle her behavior and outbursts. They’re so frequent and chaotic I’m literally losing my mind. She is so hot headed and quick to cry or whine about every little thing. Everything is a hassle. I love her to death but I have EXTREMELY little patience with her. I feel like I’ve tried everything and her behavior hasn’t improved. I’m exhausted. Her dad and I alternate weeks and I really hate to say this but I get anxiety when it’s time for her to come home because I know what’s coming. Please help me.
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Have you tried the corner or quiet time? 
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Thats normal for a 2 year old. She will calm down eventually and learn to control her emotions. Its the terrible twos. My daughter is the same.
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Think of it like this: You, an adult, are having a really hard time controlling your emotions. Your 2 year old, a person who has only been around 2 years and doesn’t have a fully developed brain…is having a hard time controlling her emotions too.
Toddlers are hard. But it won’t get better if YOU are losing it.
It’s tough to give advice when we know so little of your child, her routines/daily life. Every kid is so different. But for sure, set boundaries, let her scream (but stick to your boundaries), offer emotional support, and set the example for her. Be consistent and patient.
Also, consider getting help for yourself. If you’re having a whole lot of trouble regulating your emotions, maybe that’s a sign that you weren’t taught how. It’s never too late to learn! 
My son has always been a highly emotional child. I know a thing or two of tantrums and meltdowns. He’s almost 4 now, and it’s been getting so much better. Us giving him grace and patience (but sticking hard to boundaries), has created such an empathetic little guy. It’s the sweetest thing watching him trying to help other kids when they have big feelings. 
But it wasn’t easy! And I kid you not, has taken 2 years to get to this point! Consistency & patience!
Goodluck! 
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I have two three yr old grandchildren, they are both the same. This is a normal stage of life. They are frustrated at this age, they show it in temper tantrums because they can’t have what they want. I found if I can get down face to face with them and talk to them. I have taught them to take a deep breath and let it out slow, usually three times and then I say show me what you want, and then we compromise if they can’t have it
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Have you had her evaluated for neurodevelopmental delays? Does she show signs of autism? She is also still a baby unable to communicate her feelings and is going home to home. It’s difficult for her to understand.
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That’s why it is called ‘the terrible twos’. Don’t lose heart. Hopefully it will improve.
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Gooi n glasie WYN and let it play out
Kids test the gangster in you bid for patience dear
Ahhh terrible two’s God love em, part of development at that age their emotions all over the place and they aren’t good at expressing them so may react inappropriately the way you respond plays a. big part of it, distraction works well, love and patience they do outgrow this, also even children at this age can have a bad day, Simple things like not being able to find their favorite toy to them can seem catastrophic if having a meltdown try to be patient also when dad has her maybe take the time for yourself, mom’s need time for themselves as well Keep in mind too she may walk and talk but still a baby
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I would suggest psychology as support for yourself, and depending on your child, they may also benefit from assessment and advice given to you at least. It’s not easy especially when you don’t have a “village” 
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Talk to your dr and ask for a referral for your kid to be evaluated and possibly even receive therapy. A split is always hard on a child, specially a child that doesn’t know how to properly convey their feelings nor can control them. Therapy may be able to help her curve some of that behavior and understand better her current situation. 
Just want to mention, she can feel your tension, anxiety,etc. you got alot of good advice. In time I am sure all will work out. Rule out anything medical would be my advice too. Along with Time an Patience she will get there. Good Luck:smiling_face_with_three_hearts:
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This going back and forth is confusing this child,this in part is part of the problem,are dads rules the same as your rules?Is he lax on structure?If so can you imagine how impossible this is for this child? Also you need to put a check on yourself.Why you so upset with this baby?Educate yourself on 2-3 yr old behavior.Calm down,enjoy your baby,you’ll regret it if you dont
It’s such a normal stage, but also take into consideration that she may be bored. Get some playdoh and play with it, with her. Maybe some fun/simple activities to keep her occupied.
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Congratulations. Ur being taught patience. Learn from it. She’s 2. It passes. Stand firm in your choices.
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How is she with her dad? Maybe it the constant back and forth. He is very young to be going through a week here a week there.
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Mary Cowton yep. And the terrible (2)s happen when they are about (13). 
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It’s called being a toddler and having no way to regulate your emotions yet….
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She could have behavioral health issues like ADHD maybe have your baby tested to rule out everything maybe get some counseling for your and your baby , best of luck saying a prayer for you .
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She is a toddler.
Teach her communication - she’s just as frustrated as you are.
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She is 2 1/2 what do you expect she is spending one weekend with you one with her dad the poor kid won’t know what’s going on she is reacting the only way she knows how she needs lots of reassurance from you lots of explaining in ways she understands a weekend is a long time for a child that age why don’t you do one night see how it goes she will have separation anxiety then the whole weekend not having a go I know it’s hard love x
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That’s 2 year olds, you have to constantly redirect, make everything fun or a game, take their mind off of the tantrum or outburst, you literally can do anything, find things they love and redirect them, puzzles, dolls, books, you really have to have a lot of patience, I have a 3 year old and I do this all day everyday. Sometimes when he’s throwing a fit I pick him up and spin him, jump, dance, sing loud, I go hide and he finds me, then I find him, I tickle him, or we’ll do jumping jacks or spins or squats, start talking in a different voice, talk like animals, start counting or play games of everything you see, you really have to change your mind to think like a child do things you know they’ll love. Build blocks knock them down when they’re mad, have them throw toys in a bucket when they’re mad, it’s a lot of consistency it’s definitely not easy and it takes practice. Remember your daughter is innocent and everything she is, is taught by the adults in her life.
Does she sleep thru the night? Have her tonsils? Any issues with snoring or drooling with mouth open? Sounds like signs of sleep apnea if so ask pcp for sleep study
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This is typical toddler behavior. Be calm & patience. Toddlers can sense your anxiety & will act accordingly. Also don’t give into her demands- just walk away & let her scream.
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Best advice I got was from the child health nurse : pay attention to the behaviour you want to see more of. I had a little chart where I did ticks for good behaviour (talking nicely, good manners , listening to what I said, sharing etc). At 10 ticks, they got a sticker / stamp / jelly bean. Amazing how well it worked.
If everything medical is ruled out and neurological conditions are ruled out, you should evaluate how she’s treated at her father’s house. Sometimes children will act out the most where they feel safe, it’s called masking. Give her the space and love to feel safe and get those feelings out. You should also establish boundaries and stand firm on them with your child and the father. Good luck
From one momma who has a child similar and 5 now, I would start looking into getting a paediatrician, so the long wait to be tested is accessible when she hits that age.
Could be a number of things and is the behaviour the same with the father?
I noticed my son was different at 2-2.5 also and had to get all the referrals myself.
Do not let the doctor tell you they will grow out of it and they are too young.
With outburst I ignore and don’t give a reaction. Once done then I hug and talk it out. All three of my kids are very hot headed and scream cry if I can’t handle it I walk out of the room if they follow I will go to the bathroom and close the door to get a minute. A lot of time they do it for any kind of attention and a reaction from you. When I do this I have noticed it has gotten better bc they know I am going to ignore it
Terrible Twos. Remember that saying? It’s true!
I can tell many of you never babysat when you were young at least more than once!
4 and 6 year.olds are trying stages also!
Imagine being to small to do things you want to do and not having the vocabulary to explain. Imagine having to move every week, with different food, different toys, different bed, different stuff! Sounds pretty grim to me, and I think most adults wouldn’t do well with that either. She’s a new human, 2 1/2 is pretty young and under good circumstances that age is what adults perceive as difficult. She’s not much past babyhood, cut her some slack.
the regular change in schedule & households is probably why she’s acting out… she’s a lil & things are always changing… my routine isn’t regular, my sleep & diet are probably not regular between the houses… possibly overwhelming
My granddaughter put drawings of faces with different emotions low down on the fridge. She taught her to identify each emotion. When she cried she asked are you sad or angry pointing to the face. Then said it’s it’s ok to be angry. Then distract them with something they are interested in. Children at this age are so curious they can be easily distracted. Perhaps something to try.
You are not alone. Toddlerhood is not for the weak. All I can offer for advice is being consistent with discipline when needed. And come to terms with toddlers are explores who makes mess while they figure out the world and their emotions. They still don’t know how to identify emotions or how to handle them so be patient and model appropriate behavior to big feelings.