Last night, I finally built up the courage to tell my husband that I was finished with our marriage. I always told him to please try talking to me more, love me more, make me feel like I’m worth his time, give me some attention… he still doesn’t. Enough is enough. He is shocked & upset, which I expected. He’s also hurt, which I ALSO expected. I’m hurt too. I can’t stand how he treats our girls. He pushes them away, doesn’t give them attention, no love, no affection between a father and his daughters, doesn’t play with them, doesn’t read books with them, he always yells… again, enough is enough. I told him to try more, do more — still nothing. I AM LEAVING. I need to RUN. I don’t want to look back and regret it, saying things like “I should’ve left. I should’ve done this and that” DO IT NOW. Be on my own with the kids, and we’ll be happier. Right now, it’s really hard going through this… one day at a time. Please tell me you’re going through this too. I really need support right now.
I stayed longer than I should have. We went to counseling,he walked out first session. The counselor said ,“I see a divorce in your future”. It took me two more years to do it. When he saw I was leaving he wanted counseling again. It gets to a time and place that it’s too late. I wish I had left sooner. I hurt my kids by staying. He didn’t show them any more attention than he did me. One son said to him that I was his mother and father.
Sounds like you are doing what is best for you and your kids. Y’all deserve to be happy. To be with people who want to make y’all happy. Prayers sent and I wish y’all a happy future
You can love your children and still not know how to parent. He is their father. Part of the divorce needs to recommend parenting classes for both of you. To be fair. It cannot hurt. It is hard to be a single parent. Been there. Good luck to you. 
Did this when my son was 3. Best decision i ever made! I remarried when my son was almost 18. 2nd marriage was a good one. Sadly after twenty some years together he passed away. Been a widow now for18 yrs, my son and grandson are great. You don’t need a man to make u complete, women are the strong ones. Men are needy! Good Luck! My son became a great father without the help of his father. My grandson is almost 20 and a fine young man.
March 2017…I could have written this! 18 years of marriage, 2 daughters and I was miserable. When I told him I wanted a divorce, he was shocked. Even cried. Fast forward, and I am remarried to a man who appreciates and respects me😊 he loves “our girls” (we have 5 daughters together) and my ex still doesn’t seek out time with his kids. Run…don’t walk! Even if you are alone for a while, you won’t feel as lonely and hurt as you did living with someone who is unable to assist in your happiness. Good luck!
Go for it
Go for happiness
Live your best life with your kids
Take care of u first
When the kids see u happy
They became happy
Tell them tolk to them
Don’t look back . You will be fine . It’s very hard but life is too short to be with someone who makes you unhappy. Live your best life with your kids. Go for Happiness. I did it 40 years ago and never looked back
You have thought about it and sounds like it’s a good decision and yes - many years ago
I am going threw it now , no daye nighr , no love making , He does nothing with my kids ,but he is a good father to our son that we adopted together , i get no gifts at holidays . I just lost my best frind in October she was always there to help me and i was able to vent to her . We arw still together because our son is Autistic and i dont feel the need for him to deal with change so i just deal with it . I wish i could be lkie look it over but i know our son will suffer . I feel like he is my live in roommate . And i really miss my Friend now i just cry alot .
I went through this. As I was moving my things out, he wanted to go see a counselor, which I had been asking him to do for months. To late. He was a good provider but the emotional support was not the for myself or my daughter. It was a good move for us. We fell in love with life again.
I did this too, but I stayed way too long. When I finally made the decision to leave, it was like this eternal sadness lifted. I knew I had challenges ahead, but there was hope that my life would get better. I wish I would have left sooner.
I have to stay. But if I could support me and the twins I would.
Reach for the stars!!! Anythings possible!
You need to think of your daughters Leave!
In order to feel love and be loved you have to give it affection attention kind words closeness …you have to teach men how to love you …love is an action and you are just as responsible for it as he is men aren’t as emotional as women but they need it to …lady get out of your own way and go teach him by loving him teaching him how to love you …you are as much to blame as him and more so because your the one with the problem and no matter where you go next or what man you get next gonna have the same problem because you are STILL you demand love no no its like telling a 3 year old child to read a book …they cant even sound out words because nobody has taught them they dont know what an A sounds like they don’t recognize by looking at it that it is an A …if you haven’t taken the time and put in the efforts of teaching a man how to love you …women have all these expectations childish really "expectations are predetermined resentment " and let me just say theres a million women out here that are gonna love your man so good he will wonder why he ever chose you … And you will be alone and no man will ever measure up to your imagination because you never share your fantasy with him … Your love life is your responsibility you made a commitment …ask yourself do you flirt with him ??? Do you even know how …i get half of my satisfaction by being the aggressor in my relationship and let me tell you ain’t a woman alive that can steal my man not even a glance . you will see throw your tantrum you will see i told you the truth . and you will be sorry and you can not undo it once you follow through .
Leave!! Be the woman teaching your daughters that you deserve better, you have self worth and self respect!
Woman should be equals.
Life is to be enjoyed!
Go enjoy your girls and laugh again!
Seven months ago I walked away from a 22 year marriage. I wanted the same thing you wanted. He was not willing. It was the best thing I ever did. I am 61. Got a part time job, rented a room. I am a very happy woman now. I am enjoying life and will never go back to a toxic relationship. It’s going to be hard and lonely. Please hang in there it will get easier.
Its hard but you can do it. It is so important for your babies to see that you have value and self worth. And having happyness and joy are equally as important they are food for the soul. I can tell you this i spent 25 plus year with my children father and the was very little happyness just days here and there. When i in the stages of leaving and told my children my youngest became enraged and hung up stating she would never speak to me or her father again. I was shocked i thought she would be a big supporter since she is very bitter toward het father. After she calmed down and I was able to talk. She explained that her anger and hurt toward my leaving is because why did i wait so long and allowed them to grow up so miserable and happy and now they were all moved out and I was going to change things after it was too late for them. I had never looked at it thought their eyes but i wish i would have
Good for you girl!!! Maybe this will be a wake up call on his part. You just did what a lot of woman wish they could do. I’m proud of you!! Keep in being you. Things will get better with time. God has a plan for you. One day you will find a man that truely deserves your love and appreciates everything about you. His loss. Never look back and concentrating on you and your lovely babies. Kuddos. Go treat yourself when ur feeling sad. Even if it’s just soaking in the tub!! U got this. Find yourself again and enjoy the less stress that he brings to the table
Actually I am. Problem is I stayed til the kids were out of highschool. Now I am getting a divorce. Its sad, all I can think if is the Bruno Mars song of how he lost his girl because he didnt take her dancing and buy her flowers and some one elsd is.
God Bless you and your little girls you will be happier and love the girls easier without him
Do what you need to for you and your children. Don’t go through physical, emotional or mental abuse to keep your family together. It isn’t worth your soul or family health. E strong when you have to yet be the mother you need to be for your kids.
Im not going through it but my players are with you and your doing wjats right for you and your girls go and be happy
Hang in there…it will be ok. I left with a 5 and 7 year old…it will get easier …life is too short to be unhappy…plus you’re showing your children they have options and deserve to be happy! Was the best decision I ever made for me and my kids… they are adults today …I wish I had left sooner than I did…good luck and God Bless:heart:
Been there done that! I got fed up with the same issues you had along with a few others. You will be happier and so will your kids. You can do it! Best of luck.
I started over with a NB and a 4yr old. I got a section 8 house, a grant to go to community college, got on a tanf program that paid my day care. Do not take out a student lone for any reason. Civic action helped with some of my expenses. Don’t let any man distract you. I had another baby when I first started college. I did bad in high school but had a 3.8 GPA in college. You can do this. I went on to pay for a house. My 3 kids are grown, good and independent. You will be fine. Make your own good life for you and the kids
It will be hard at first and will have to wondering if you did the right thing but trust your instincts and what you know you need to do. Like you said enough is enough and know you and your girls will be happier in the long run.
I completely understand. Going through a very similar situation. You are a very brave woman. You will come out better on the other side
stick to hour convictions you and your daughters will be happy life is short never give up
Totally agree! These folks need to talk with a clergyman or counselor. This site is not designed for sad situations we can do nothing for…
Been through this. Was super scared but ended up being the road that took me to the best life I’ve ever had and always wanted 
I hope you told all of this to him and not just us.
I’ve been there. Was the best decision I’ve ever made! I found my husband and he loves me and my children more then anything in the world!!!
You complain that he pushes them and you away and your reaction is to push him away? Sounds like you both need counselling.
You need to be happy , you are doing the right thing it may be hard but get out now , he’ll never change to make you happy he is what he is !!!
EVERYONE deserves happiness! Remember this when your down!!
Hang tough. It is a challenge but you and your girls will be better for it. Stay strong.
I am in a troubled marriage and not sure what to do so every day I get up and pray for God to guide me.
I was married for 21 years and wanted the same things from my ex-husband. We divorced 6 years ago. I had 3 kids with me at the time. It was a weight lifted from my shoulders. I now have a husband who shares my level of touch and affection. I am so happy. I am happy to have had my children with the first husband but I am very complete now! Do what’s best for you and your children. Look froward for now. I don’t regret any of these decisions I’ve made in my life. After all, they were MY decisions. Best of luck to you! You’re not alone!!
Marriage entails vows. Commitments, BIG commitments…VOWS! Nowhere did the ceremony state: “…until my feelings get hurt do we part…” .
Make the time to get counseling. Nproceed with caution. Taking the kids and running away may sound like the solution, but how will you keep yourself from landimg right back in the same depressed situation with someone else? It takes two people to succeed or fail…
You got this! Show your girls they DO NOT have to accept this kind of behavior THEY are better than this
it wont be easy but you and the girls will be better off for leaving
Get out. Don’t look back.
Have you tried counseling? He has a deep seated issue with women and you both need to try. If he is not physically or mentally abusing you try to keep the family together.
Literally my life. 
You’re being strong for your daughters and showing them that it’s not ok to settle for less than what they deserve. You’re making the right choice
It is better to be alone than to stay with someone and be lonely. You and your kids deserve more. It is hard but you will feel like a huge weight has been lifted. You are right not to wait to long because you will regret it. If it makes you and your kids feel bad now, it will only get worse and they will grow up thinking that it is normal for a man to treat them that way. I have been there and I have seen it happen. I feel so bad that I let it go on so long because I thought I could not do it on my own. Boy was I wrong !! We can be as strong as we want to be. Don’t look at this as if you have failed. Look at it as a lesson well learned and move on. If he tries to come back and says he will change----he won’t. It will go back to the same way. Good Luck and stand your ground.
I left with two babies. I have now been with my girls as single parent for 15 years.
You will need to be strong.
Your doing he right thing.
Congratulations for finally seeing your worth you deserve better don’t look back and believe me you’ll be happier NEVER ask to be treated well or beg if you have to ask then better off walking away you will one day find someone who will automatically treat you right 
lots of luck to you and I’m happy for you 
hugs
You made the right choice. Be proud of yourself and don’t look back. Start making positive moves for you and the babes. You got this! 
Are we sisters from another mister??? Cause this was me 2 years ago and I cant tell you enough, be proud of yourself!!! You deserve love. You should NEVER have to tell your partner how to do that, it should come natural. Good luck to you!!!
I went through this years ago and I was amazed with myself on how well I did with 3 kids… soo hard yet so rewarding at the same time… You 
can do this on your own!! I PROMISE the hard times are worth it:heart:hang in there:muscle:t2:
You are so strong. You deserve so much better mama and so do your girls. You should never had to ask or beg to be treated with love and respect. You are absolutely doing what’s best for you and your girls, keep going forward. very proud of you
What did you do yourself to help him make these changes cause changes like those do not happen alone or overnight it sounds like you both need therapy and counselling if it were me I wpukd seperate for alittle bit and maybe try to sort that stuff out and then do some family counselling
Sounds alot like my moms situation when she finally left my dad. However it took her 23yrs of a very unhappy, lonely marriage to divorce him. And she WISHES she did it much sooner, for her and to show my sister and I a different life. You ARE doing the right thing. You are very courageous. Keep your chin up and stay strong!
I left my husband of 15 years, 3 years ago and it was the best thing that I did. He was a narcissist and not just to me but our kids. It was hard at first, I’m not gonna lie but so worth it. I have a great group of friends that are my support family. My kids and I are so much happier. I did it for my kids. They don’t deserve to love like that. I recommend getting a support circle or therapy, budget your money, figure out what you can live without, apply for assistance if you can. After you move out, limit contact with him and only about your girls. Good luck and you got this!!!
Good for you for leaving the table where respect is no longer being served. No one should ever have to ask to be treated well. When someone treats you like they don’t care, believe them!
You shouldn’t have to ask to be treated well. Your doing what’s best for your girls and teaching them their worth. Don’t look back but move forward 
Enjoy the rest of your life…enjoy your children and hold your head up…you did good
You’re doing the right thing and hats off to you for that. Just know that better days are coming. Hugs.
How bad is it, do u still love him, maybe u need some time apart, ive went thru a divorce and its hard on everyone, i hope your not doing this out of anger, if you are its not real, but if you have thought about this awhile then its proably ok. But i would take some time on this.
Yes I’m a single mother of twin boys. You did the right things .
That’s emotional abuse, you’re doing the right thing!
Just keep being strong for your kids , my mom was a single parent for a long time . And I’m thankful every day that she put us first before a crappy marriage and a crappy husband.
Sending love and prayers. In Jesus mighty precious name.
Your doing the right thing!! I begged for love for sooo long from someone! It took me way to long to learn my self worth, to learn I can & will be happy, to learn my children deserve a happy mom! If I’m not happy how can my babies be happy?! It took me awhile to realize I was working way to hard & giving way to much to someone who didn’t appreciate not one bit off it! It’s rough, there’s no doubt about it! But one day at a time it gets easier! I caught a glimpse in the mirror of the woman I lost many years ago… MYSELF & it’s never felt better to feel the light come back to my life!!
Right here, that’s me. I know what u r feeling. It’s scary yet exhilarating at the same time. It will be ok.
You’ve got this! You are doing what’s best for you. Stay strong!
I’m in same situation…leave. Don’t look back.
Just go, don’t look back. If you are that unhappy it’s time to move on.
You and your kids deserve better.let it go.breathe
Been there… Gods Blessings.
Proud of you for being strong!
U did the right thing
Stay strong ,you are not alone
I too left what was a violent marriage. It was really difficult. I went back a month later. The violence continued and we left again a few weeks after going back. Haven’t been back since. It’s been 4 years. Seek counseling help. Call the 800 number for domestic violence. They’re full of resources. Love yourself. You’re worth it.
Aww be strong… ive been through it… caught my husband if 15 years cheating on me… i left him too, we had 5 kids together plus my 3 older ones i had before him… he didn’t think i would stick to it but i did… his excuse was i didnt give him enough attention… mind you i was the only one working at the time(he wasnt a citizen), i asked him many times if i should work less days he said no take more days(i was making good money at the time so it seemed right for our family) so i did… id have to cook because he didnt, i was exhausted all the time and working 6 days a week… only to find out while i was busting my butt providing for all of us until he could work or get his papers… he was cheating with multiple women… i moved on got a younger better man… hes bitter and lonely now🤷🏽♀️ you will get through this… its better to be single and happy rather then with someone and miserable all the time… ppl dont change unless they want to… clearly he was too comfortable and thought he could just keep doing what he was doing… now that he sees youre serious of course he’s going to be upset