At a loss- my 4 year old son has been going pee on the potty for almost 6 months now, rarely an accident. But for the life of me I cannot get him to go poop on the potty. Unfortunately I don’t think daycare is doing much to encourage him either as she feels it should start in the home. I can sit on the potty with him all day/night. The first sign of alone time or distraction that pulls me away he poops in his pull up or undies. He is supposed to start preschool in a little over a month. I just need us to make progress, I am open to any and all suggestions. Please no bashing, I know he is a little old to not be potty trained yet.
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In the exact same situation!
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My son was like this too. He eventually finally got over this
Don’t feel bad my 4 year old was a pain to potty train. We are starting tk here he will be 5 in November and has only been potty trained for a few months. We did everything. The only thing that worked was a potty watch finally. He got distracted all the time and I had a hard time being consistent with reminding him
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The most we put pressure on them, the most they run away from it. I got a little ladder and a sit for the toilet and he was excited to be a big boy and use the grown up toilet 
. He hated the potty. After that he started to used it. It happen really fast. He saw the other kids at daycare using the bathroom and he wanted to do it too. Remember, children copy what they see . I always recommend the ladder/sit.
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Okay I know it’s weird. But… I left mine naked for a week at home of course. Butt naked and when I would see any sign of poop I would run to the bathroom. We also set a timer for every 20 mins. We would just go sit on the potty for fun. We did potty pops ( dum dum suckers) we did the potty dance, we did a couple of books while we sat there together. We did, tell me a story. We did draw on the small white board. We did everything I could think of to get his attention on the potty. It took a while, but with patience and encouragement they will do it eventually. My cousin’s son was 5 when he started going on his own. So everyone is different but he will get it.
My 4 year old will Poop in the toilet but will not pee consistently he refuses and will change his own pull up🥴
He is not the only one . Boys can just take longer . Patience . It will happen
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Don’t use pull ups. And try to put him on the hour when he is at home.
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Put him on the toilet with pull-ups on. When he’s consistently pooping on the toilet cut a hole in the nappy then remove the nappy altogether when he’s comfortable
My son is 3 and is mostly potty trained, it sounds gross but he will not poop on the potty without a blanket on his lap. He gets uncomfortable without one, gonna be a weird habit to break later but it works for now. 
Get rid of the pull ups they are too comfortable.
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My youngest son did the same thing, completely potty trained by 3 but would ask for a pull up to poop and if I didn’t give it to him ( trying to use the potty) he would hold it, obviously I didn’t want him doing that. We started a poop chart on big poster board and put it in the bathroom. I explained how every time he poops on the potty he gets a sticker, after 5 stickers he got a small toy or some activity- reward. But your son on the potty with his pull-up on. So he’s pooping in his pull up but while sitting on the potty. This helped big time with my son as he was used to the squatting position. I would sit with him read books, sing songs, let him play a game on the tablet- all while sitting on the potty. It creates a some distraction while getting used to sitting on the potty. Applaud and praise him like crazy for sitting on the potty, even the smallest accomplishment, make it a BIG deal. After I started doing these things after exhausting all else he was fully potty trained within a couple months! Good luck Mama!
Pants no pull ups. And in this hot weather, if at home, nothing at all if need be. And lots of praise when he masters it.
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For some reason kids are scared ashamed and afraid to pop. It’s common. Be patient with him. My grandson went through this this He gagged when he pooped Never shame
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Potty training is sooo hard. Don’t feel bad. Get a fun potty seat or potty with his fav theme. My son’s fav candy is m&ms and we kept a jar of m&ms onlyyyy for when he went potty. Also show him how you do poop on the potty. Keep in tight undies so it feels uncomfortable and when he poops himself tell him how gross it is “omg poop goes in potty, yuckyyy” and show him the poop belongs in the potty. Lots of praise and encouragement. Good luck!
Patience. Try a poop routine morning and evening. And give him pull ups. It will be ok soon
My son did this at that age. I slacked back a little bit as I felt I was pressuring him. He started preschool a month later, fully potty trained. Me not keeping at him constantly and letting him figure it out of his own helped him out. Not all kids are the same, but he preferred to figure it out in secret.
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When I knew my son knew what he was doing, I made him clean the poop out of his pants. It only took him once and he ever did it again.
My niece told me that she heard of putting a new toy high on a “shelf” that he couldn’t reach and when he said he wanted it, she told him when he poops on the potty he can have it. He pooped immediately she said. lol 
I know it’s bribery, but she said it worked. Now he just poops on the potty now.
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Give him raisins and let them sit awhile…it will happen!
There is sometimes anxiety associated with pooping on the potty because, to them, it sometimes feels like they’re losing a part of themselves. Give it time, patience, and lots of praise and positivity around the potty. Too much pressure can create more stress. You could try a prize box. I got a handful of random things at the dollar tree when my daughter was potty training. Then when she’d poop, she’d get to pick a toy, then once we were more consistent, if she went 5 days in a row, I’d take her to pick something a little more special, or just pick something on my own. It takes time, but he’ll get there.
Underwear let him feel it. dont change right away wait until he feels uncomfortable. Pull-ups don’t really work they are the same as diapers. Did you show him that you poop too and you poop in the potty? Everybody poops and it’s normal. I have heard kids don’t like the splash of water when they poop. My 3 kids didn’t have an issue pooping in the toilet. But they followed me everywhere including the bathroom. They asked what you doing why and yes I showed them.
My son was also 4. This is something they have control over and sometimes it can become a power struggle.
One day I was so fed up, I grabbed a wet washcloth (no wipes at this time), stood him in the bathtub and insisted he clean himself up. He didn’t want to touch the poop. It turned into a crying/fussing/screaming fit, but I held my ground and didn’t let him get out of the bathtub until he cleaned himself up.
Was there a mess in the tub? Ohhhhh yeah. Did it cause me extra work? Yep. I kept my cool though and kept explaining that he was a big boy, that big boy’s went poop in the toilet and that from now on, when he pooped, he was going to have to clean himself up.
I think there were 4 more accidents after that but he HATED cleaning himself and figured it out himself quickly.
You can’t control daycare, but you can at home. You have to remain consistent.
I would do an award system and also let him run around nakey if you can.
Tell him he can’t go to school until he is potty trained. If he is excited about going he will stop so he can go.
They have kids books 
Like EVERYBODY POOPS 
. Might wanna read with him… maybe while he’s sitting on potty. Good luck.
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Put a bunch of differnt rewards in a box or small tote… Tell him when he goes he gets to choose a prize. Also there are many age appropriate books you can read to him while he sits on the toilet.
I made a game the toilet is hungry, it needs your poop to be full! And when I’d hear the plop I’d make yum yum noises. When he’d poop in the pull up I’d say the garbage was full but the potties hungry.
Have him “change himself” with your help. Have him take the diaper off and pour the poop in the toilet and wipe himself.
I had the same problem with my son. He would just be to busy to bother. Last time he did it in his pants I brought him to the tub filled it & gave him soap & washcloth & told him to figure it out on his own. And he did. And never happened again
Are you sure he’s not constipated
Make it fun? Put a sticker in the bottom of the potty and tell him to poop on it x
I used to keep my kids naked and moved the little toilet to wherever they were playing.
Right there with you. Mine will come get a pullup and put it on to poop in it. He will be 5 in September. I don’t even know what to do. He’s the youngest of 8 boys and never did I have this problem. He may be wearing adult disposable undies to college 
Try the “poo goes home to pooland” app - I tried everything with my boy (present on high shelf)
(No pull up )
- he flat out refused until he watched the story on the iPad …… he wouldn’t/didn’t want to watch with me and he found the app about 2 weeks later after I had given up all hope …… he then told me he wanted to go to the toilet so that poo could go back to pooland - we had to wave his turd at every flush - but he’s been going ever since with no accidents
My son wasn’t fully potty trained till he was 5 by 4 he would pee in the potty but wouldn’t poop kids learn when they learn n boys usually take longer than girls
My son did that also when preschool started he was almost 4. I told him he is only allowed to wear underwear in preschool , no diapers …he peed / pooped once in his drawers at school and never did it again. I think he felt embarrassed . He grew up to be confident in everything he did, he is still a confident dependable young man. Ps: never pooped his pants again…lol
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