I cannot understand my three-year-old: Help?

Hi please help I have a three year old beautiful baby girl.she will be turning four on the 31st of December. I just have one problem-i can’t seem to understand her. Shes too hyper, and what stresses me the most is that she hasn’t been able to speak properly(slow speech). She doesn’t listen to anything I tell to do, and she has tantrums.I’ve tried to be patient with her, but I’m losing it. i really wanna start understanding her course I love her with all my heart, and I wanna be a good mom to her too.what can do? (I’m a first-time mom)

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Sign language so my now 3yr old has a speech delay she is getting state help. She starts a pre pre prek school class next week. I suggest starting sign language to help you both out. Toddler sign language. And get help from doctor. In my state it’s called child watch. But stops at 3yr olds. So you might be to late but see what the doctor says

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Does your state have a program such as baby net? You need to get her in speech therapy!

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You can speak with her primary doctor about your concerns. They offer speech therapy and other options that the doc may recommend.

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Take her to her pediatrician? They can help you get a speech therapist. Most kids are hyper and react different when they feel they aren’t getting understood.

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Please have her tested to see if she is on the spectrum.

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You need to discuss it with your child’s doctor and they can point you in the right direction.

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Not sure where you live, but Florida has a program called Early Steps where you can get a free evaluation and free speech therapy prior to preschool. Maybe your state has something similar?

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Have they checked her for different spectrums of autism?

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Mine is this way! He’s 2.
His daycare teacher didn’t think he could even talk till he said something one day.

He’s high strung and was a handful but just calmed down one day. I’m really thankful he did because I was crying myself to sleep at times!
Best luck momma

Get her ears checked. Preschool will help also. Good luck. Keep up the good work. Taking care of a toddler is not always easy.

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Stop and help her with her speech, that’s why she is having tantrums, its her way off showing frustration.

Have you had her checked for adhd or autism.Thats where I would start

Terrible 3s I don’t know why people say it’s the 2s. It’s definitely a stage they all go through at 3. :rofl:

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My youngest daughter now 7, was this same way she ended up having tubes put in her ears and speech classes two times a week and most recently diagnosed with adhd.

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My daughter was like that. We learnt that she had a learning disability and a speech problem. We put her in speech therapy and put her in early preschool

Have you had her hearing checked? My 19 month old grandson doesn’t speak except for saying mama. Last week Dr recommended that he have his hearing checked because he should be saying 15 to 20 words by now.

Your pediatrician can help you find out how you can go about getting involved in your areas early intervention team if you have one, and if she’s to old for that you can possibly get into your districts SE department. We did EI and at 3 he was transferred to our SE department. He got speech OT and a behavioral therapist and at 3 was placed into an integrated pre-K program. Did absolute wonders for him. He’s now 4 and is down to just an SE teacher in his pre-K. If you can’t get into the district pediatrician can help you access speech therapy at least. I absolutely recommend bringing your concerns up with your peds and taking the proper steps to get her into some kind of program. It will do wonders. And they can also help you figure out ways to help at home and how you both can cope.

Sign language is good. Is the not listening new or has she been doing that the whole time? I ask because my cousin has an auditory processing issue which made him have speech problems and not listen because he wasn’t hearing the words correctly. I recently had to have my son tested for it too. Both my kids have speech problems but my daughter has outgrown it my son has not and he does not listen well. Then there is autism or just ADD, ADHD. They think my son may have the ADD because he is not overly hyper but he just can’t stay on one thing for long.

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As a parent of an autistic child my advice would be to get an evaluation for ASD.

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Check with your pediatrician for a referral to speech therapy. You can also check with your districts public school system and see if they have a preschool program. They can evaluate her for speech delays and get her into a school setting with speech therapy services provided.

My daughter did a prek last year and had speech therapy twice a week there. Now 4k still sees a speech therapist twice a week.

And speech delay does not automatically mean spectrum disorders!!! My 5yo didnt speak until he was 3 and it was gibberish. After two years of testing, evaluations, and speacialists, we found out he has a minor cleft in the roof of his mouth that caused his speech issues. And the lack of communication is what caused his behavioral problems. Hes been in intensive speech for a year and as his speech improved, so did his behavior.

My youngest will be 4 on 12/6. His speech is crap honestly. And after having him evaluated in the spring, he has zero mental or physical causes for his delays. Hes just behind in speech 🤷

Dont let yourself get into a panic until youve had evaluations and tests.

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And honestly, not listening and tantrums are a pretty normal part of having a 3yo. Weve got 4 kids and 3 is the worst age so far.

Have her hearing checked and put her in speech therapy. My son has the same problem and after making sure his hearing was fine. We did speech therapy and it worked amazing, he still struggles cause we ended up moving but his school is going to be working with him.

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Well she is 3 this all sounds completely normal for 3 to me. The energy needs to be expended take her out side to play let her run and jump and climb as much as possible also find activities to do together. And I know it’s going to sound weird but make sure she is getting enough sleep and isn’t overly tired as that can cause hyperness. You may also want to limit her sugar intake and cut out red dye and caffeine completely as both cause hyper activity. The speech issue can be helped by speaking to her just like you would a adult (no baby talk) and calmly telling her you need her to slow down so you can understand her. But getting on her level and actually communicating with her will do wonders. Also make sure she uses her words don’t just hand her something when she points at it or whines instead look at her and try and to get her to watch your mouth and ask what she wants or if she doesn’t know the word say what you think it is and only give It when you feel she has made a effort to say what she wants. Having her watch you speak and having her repeat after you will help a lot as well also make sure to speak slowly and clearly when talking to her. I am assuming you have already had her hearing checked to rule out any issues with that and had her checked for a tongue tie. Her pediatrician should have been checking for early signs of autism at her well child check ups. Good luck from a mom of 8 and two special needs children

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Besides the slow speech the other is normal. My daughter will be four in January she’s the same way except she advanced cognitively and her education for her age

Talk to your pediatrician and try and get a referral for speech therapy. My oldest had the same problem. :heart:

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The energy is normal. As is the testing limits by not listening. Have you considered speech therapy for her? The fact that you cant understand may be why she throws tantrums, she’s frustrated.

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You may want to go get her ears checked, she could need tubes and her adenoids taken out… but she sounds like she a normal 3 year old with how active she is… work with her on her words, she’s probably just getting frustrated since you can’t understand her

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Speech therapist and have her hearing checked

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My son would talk so fast I did not know he was actually talk a friend figured it out and have him stand by me and relax it worked. Back then no programs to help

Hmm has she had a hearing test?

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Start with eliminating red and yellow food dyes.

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Has she been evaluated ? Like not just for speech but her ears checked ? Definitely make an appnt with her pediatrician…mine is almost the exact same age (will be 4 in dec) so you for sure should be able to understand her…/tantrums could be because shes frustrated you arent understanding her or shes in pain or some underlying issue.

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Looks like you have a consensus. Hearing and speech therapy. I would just add to DO IT NOW before it affects her progress in school.

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Play time is the most important thing for young kids. Her energy needs to be played out. Try finding activities that are stimulating both physically and mentally like nature hikes and painting. Encourage her to learn new words while you’re out everywhere. She will stop testing the limits if she doesn’t feel she has to in order to be stimulated enough and will start to become more comfortable with her speech. Remember practice makes perfect

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Speech therapist or u can look up what u can do at home basically sounding words out what helped my son the most was learning to sing songs I’d YouTube kids songs with lyrics so I could sing with him and his speech really flourished! Worth a try! And lots of patience she will get there momma dont give up!

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My 4 year old son took until he was almost 4 to be more understandable and then it would improve by the day. Sometimes kids don’t understand when their mouth can’t go as fast as their minds and hyper bodies but it works itself out. Just keep working with her. Talk to her and let her know you’re not understanding her. It took months of trying that and being ignored at first before it clicked but that helped my boys. Good luck momma. I know it’s stressful when you’re unsure if kiddo just needs their own time to work it out or if there could be a developmental concern.

I cannot stress this enough, most of these advice posts are for your child’s doctor not FB!

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My son was like this got his hearing checked and it was fine speech therapy has been recommended but we just started working with him ourselves and getting him around other kids younger and older has honestly helped. He has also started pre k this year and is excelling! He’s so smart and it’s crazy how much his speech has changed in just a short few months of being in school. They do a test at the beginning of the year and they marked concern on him for speech but they are going to retest in a few weeks and go from there but his teacher isn’t too worried about him. He’s so much easier to understand then when he was that age. But if he doesn’t do good this time when they test him at school then he’s going to see the school speech therapist but if you have the time I recommend speech therapy. But yes she’s acting out and not listening because she’s frustrated you can’t understand her. Mine was the same way for many years and yeah he was really hyper still is lol But school has mellowed him out some.

Please go get her checked out by her pediatrician and have them recommend an ent specialist (Ears, nose, and throat.) I went through similar things with my almost 5 year old and he was diagnosed with autism almost two years ago now. He needed ear tubes and began getting the therapy he needed and is doing much better ever since. Communication flows, the tantrums have stopped, he’s in a school program that helps him learn and play so he’s letting his energy out with other kids. Always voice your concerns with her doctor, it sounds like it may be a hearing issue. Good luck

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Try to talk to her ped about her talking. I know all children are different but my 2 and a half year old is speaking in complete sentences. As far as hyper, all kids are hyper… tantrums will happen. I know it’s stressfull. There’s many ways to deal with them. Ignore them or try to have her sit in a corner, and if you believe in spanking then that’s an option too.

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Get her a speech Therapist I wished I had known this 30 to 42 years ago

Take her to the doctor

Take her to the doctor to check her hearing. She should’ve started Early Intervention at age 2 but she can start speech therapy now. Also public schools may be available for an evaluation and she can start school with special education and free speech therapy sessions in school.

Maybe she needs her young clipped

Take her to a pediatrician!

Get her tested for high functioning autism, my niece is the same way, shes perfectly normal she just has problems with speech to where she couldnt be understood until she was 5 almost 6, and has behavioral issues if you dont know how to handle her, and this thing about stuff being on her hands that’s it, I’m not saying that your daughter has it but the post reminded me of my neice

ok 1st get her evaluated 2nd… make slowing down a game at first… have her take 4 SLOW deep breaths maybe do a funny slow move with it and mom do it with her… then let her speak… look for what sets off a tantrum… do u see any tall tale signs shes about to meltdown? tightening of lips or jaw, deeper breathing, fidgeting ect?? if so you can help defuse before she explodes but mom needs to stay calm … if you raise your voice ect you will add fuel to that fire… Praise her when you see her do something shes supposed to so its not all negative reinforcement i have many tips i can share that used with my 2 that have autism (we had adhd, speech, tantrum, emotional overload, sensory overload ect as symptoms) please feel free to pm me… and another big one is we figured out ways to be able to get rid of all that built up emotion and release it so it wouldnt go over… think of her mind kinda like a battery thats at 100% and a small trinkle charge while using it will keep it full but if you try and put on a quick turbo charger it can overload and blowup if there is nothing to expell that excess and no auto shutoff

The tantrums are probably related to the delayed speech. Talk to your pediatrician, but until then work on simple American Sign Language. It will help both of you feel a little less stressed, I still sign to my kids. Plus they love learning it it’s super fun and will always be useful.

My daughter is very active too. When I want to talk to her or get her to pay attention I ask her to look in to my eyes and than say what I have to say. I also use one word commands ( for a lack of a better terminology) go stop slow . I use this because sometimes I feel I use too many words and by the time I’m done explaining she has lost interest and is not paying attention. But diet and sleep are also very important.

Check her ears. Tubes instantly changed my sons speech.

Make an appointment for her hearing to be checked and make an appointment for speech therapy!! In the mean time, bring those “first words” books with pictures back out and study them hard with her. Praise her for trying to say and understand the different words and objects. That’s what my brother did and his son started picking up words and sayings after a month. Best of luck mama! :heart:

After 4 years you should be able to understand her regardless of her speech progress
You should’ve been picking it up over the years
My son has a severe speech delay and while aost none of his words sound right I still understand what he’s saying and what he’s asking for because he’s been doing it for so long
The last 3 years he has wanted “nawfuls” at random times as a snack and I know he’s asking for waffles because that is how he says the word

Need to get her ears checked and get a referral to a speech therapist!

Your not alone I’m sure there are many parents in your shoes

Take her to the doctor sounds like she maybe deaf, or autistic

She’s probably acting that way because she can’t express herself to you. Try speech therapy. It helped a lot with my son!

Start with the dr., get ears checked, and then contact your local school district. Up until 3 years old the state can help with speech and other therapy service but after 3 the school district takes over. You can call your school district to get an evaluation and see if she needs to be in their special services program to get her up to speed before kindergarten. If she qualifies it would be free vs having to pay for therapies privately. Also with the hyperness you will probably want not only speech therapy but occupational therapy too. There are some things you can do in the mean time at home. When I need my kids to concentrate on a task I have them sit in their special chair. My daughter is really wiggly so hers is soft and plush. Getting deep pressure input may also help. You can look up things to get this. There are games like leap frog, jumping, crawling, joint compression and plenty more on Pinterest you can use. Both my kids are hyper and speech delayed. My son has sensory processing disorder which leads to his and my daughter needed tubes and has some hearing loss.

She needs to haveher hearing checked. Then she needs to see a speech pathologist. My daughter had a similar problem and it was just because her speech was delayed and she would get upset because she couldn’t understand why I was getting upset that I didn’t understand her. Don’t get upset. Just be patient with her until you can get it sorted out.