I don't feel comfortable with my husbands teen watching our daughter: Am I being paranoid?

I think no 15 yr old or 2 yr old need to be w/o transportation for that long so I agree with you about the aunt watching the 2 yr old.

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That’s a lot for a 15 year old, maybe for one night or one day but not 3, maybe even have your aunt stay at your house so the kids are comfortable or have the 15 year old stay at your aunts as well, I do think it however would be great birth control for the 15 year old lol

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If she drove or you lived in town and could cook it would be different. Its unreasonable for him to give you attitude when you have someone willing to watch her already.
I would however probably let her watch her for shorter periods I was hired to do over nights with a 3 year old at around that age but I had some experience and was close enough to my parents to ask for help if necessary

Aunt house is the more responsible thing you can do for the sake of your child and your own sanity if she has no car to drive in case of emergency that’s a flat out no. I wouldn’t care what the father thinks if he isn’t there for the safety of your child and well being you do what’s best for your child no matter what. You don’t know exactly how long your going to stay in the hospital until it’s time for you to leave. My opinion. Don’t care how old the person or if it’s sibling you have to do what’s best for your child like I said anything I mean anything can happen what if she slips and falls and hurts herself it will take ambulance longer to get to her and the er then if she was at your aunt’s house. You will regret taking your spouse decision if anything bad happened and prob won’t ever forgive him cause mom’s always know best especially if you have valid reasons which you do.

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I think 15 is too young to be left home alone for multiple days, much less watching a toddler alone for several days.

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I have a 2 year old and a 16 year old. I leave then alone for trips to the store now and again, but I would never leave them alone for 3 days… it’s not my oldest son’s responsibility to assume full responsibility for my toddler for extended periods of time. I would pay a babysitter or leave them with Grandma.

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I wouldnt be play with that much time with a 15 year old. Baby sitting is one thing but not for 3+ days…I work an hour away from.our house and I wont let anyone watch my son if they cant drive. My 13 year old cousin is helpful with watching him bit I’ll only.let her if theres someone who can drive home with them. You never know when theres an emergency and they need to go somewhere

Huge responsibility for a child. I wouldn’t let my 18 year old step daughter look after my 10 year old for 3 days and she’s got a licence. You’ll have to ride out his ridiculous attitude. Imagine if anything happened to your child you would hate that 15 year old forever

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You’re not even being KINDA paranoid.

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I have a 17 year old who can cook some things and his brother is 10 and can get his own snacks. We are in town and I still wouldn’t leave them alone for one overnight let alone three. On days they don’t have school they stay home together and I still stop home and bring them lunch. 3 days is much too long for that without an adult.

I think you are completely reasonable. I thought the same thing you did when I read 15 yo (no transportation, and all the cooking and cleaning needed). Maybe his issue is that his daughter will be alone? Maybe see if she can go to your aunts house as well that way both are being cared for and takes the worry away for emergencies and such. Good luck!!

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No way, don’t do it.

No way that is way too much for a 15 year old

You have enough to worry about with the delivery. Leave your toddler with whom you trust for your peace of mind.

I’d never leave my young child with a 15 year old as their still a child themselves, leave her with your aunt who is a safer choice and you don’t have to worry and your other half is just going to have to deal with it

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I wouldn’t even leave the 15 year old 3days?!!? Am I missing something :joy: poor girl if she can’t cook how the hell is she going to get fed too? Their both underage children who would be much better suited with someone taking care of both of them

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You’re being completely reasonable - way too much responsibility and pressure on a 15 year old

The only thing I don’t like is that I get a sense you don’t get consider the 15 year old yours or even part of the family. She’s your bonus child, treat her like one.
They are both kids.
Maybe they should both spend this time at your aunt’s.

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i think it would be irresponsible to leave your 15 year old home alone that long let alone a 2 year old on top of it. They both need to be taken care of during this time. Hopefully your husband can see that. good luck!

Do NOT leave your baby alone with a kid for 3 days. If you pulled that where I live, they’d take your kids from you. That’s beyond irresponsible

You are not paranoid. That’s a lot of
responsibility for any 15 year old. I think the aunt is a better decision.

I don’t think you can legally leave them alone for that amount of time. 15, no transportation, not legal adult, can’t cook, and the sole responsible party for a toddler for 3 days maybe more. I really don’t think you can legally do that. Plus how far you are away from town and how far you will be away. If an accident happened DCF could get involved just because of their ages. Stand firm on this.

I’d see if he would be okay with the 15yr doing it at your aunt’s because thays way too much responsibility for a teen that cant even make mac and cheese. If he isnt then oh well and drop your child off at auntie’s.

It’s illegal to leave anyone under the age of 18 overnight without an adult on the property. It’s cool if she watches her for a couple hours, but overnight would legally be considered abandonment, and child endangerment in the eyes of the law.

3 days is a lot for a 15 year old. I wouldn’t do it.

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can the aunt not come an stay w the 15 year old an the 2 year old anyway ?

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I think it’s a lot to ask of a 15 yr old. And given the fact toddlers are walking hurricanes it would cause me personally a lot of anxiety

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I wouldnt leave a toddler with a 15yr old for days. Few hours sure. But not days.

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Send her to the aunts house…3 dats is far too long for a 15 yr. Old to be watching a 2 yr. Old

No…not for three days. Three hours maybe. You are not wrong and why he would think that it’s ok is beyond me.

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That is fucking insane. Do not let a 15 year old watch your daughter for three days, let alone 12 hours straight. Why are you having another kid with this man :joy:

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I would not being doing that.

Too much for a 15 year old, especially with bo transportation

That is not ok! 15 is too young to be on her own with a toddler for that long.

That’s way too much for a 15 year old. Definitely not okay.

I have a 15 year old i wldnt leave him with a toddler for three days and we are close to it all leave her where you feel comfortable and won’t have to worry

Nope… All your feelings are valid. Baby girl should go to your aunts.

I dont trust any 15 year old to watch a toddler for 3 days.

Reasonable. For all the reasons you stated. Now if it was just during day and dad went home and slept home at night each night thats another option.

Sent her to the aunt. That’s way to long for a 15 year old and a lot of responsibly

It would be irrisponsible to let a teenager watch a young child 3 days straight. She wouldnt know what to do if she caught a fever or fell and got hurt. Its just not a good idea even to leave a teen alone period for that many days without an adult

I do not think you are being unreasonable at all. and truly has anyone asked the teenager how she feels about that idea??? She is probably just terrified of that type of scenario!! My daughter is 15 and I would NEVER ask her to be in that type of situation, the amount of stress that would put onto an already crazy hormonal and emotional teenager is just not smart!!!

Trust your Instinct always👍

Nope I wouldn’t leave my kids with any 15 yr old for 3 plus days I would rather leave them with who I feel safe

A child watching a child for 3 days! Nope!

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I get your reasons 100% shes 15 and having a toddler for 3+ days is a lot of work she can’t cook either so how are they supposed to eat? Personally I think you choosing your aunt to watch your toddler is a smart idea. For your husband to not understand why you don’t want a 15 year old who is probably still in school to watch your toddler is a little unreasonable

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You are right he is wrong…its be inappropriate to have her watch her…and not fair to her! Or the baby! Stick with original plan! And dont leave that 15 y.o. alone for 3 days EITHER! LOL TRUST ME!

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I wouldn’t even want to leave the 15 year old for 3 days, let alone in charge of the 2 year old sibling. I’m sure they ment well, but in my opinion I’d firmly say no. Nothing against them, but a mother knows.

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Stick with the Aunt. Only because if something does happen your Aunt will be more experienced and closer in town! Ya 3 days is too long for a teenager! Plus you don’t need to worry while giving birth so put your foot down about this one!

Few hours hers n there or what ever but not for days while in hospital especially if live far out. Also at end day ur choice n whatbu feel comfy with :slight_smile:

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He’s f$&@ing crazy. Definitely should not have a 15yr old watching a toddler for DAYS.

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No frigging way. A 15 year old is not responsible enough for watching a 2 year old for that length of time. And no transportation that’s just asking for a problem. Btw most 15 year olds cant even watch themselves.

I am a mum of 5 and I wouldn’t leave my 18 year old son with my 4 year old let alone a two year old for that period of time. No my love you stick to your guns there. You are absolutely spot on with what you are feeling. I wouldn’t do it either x

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Who the hell is leaving a 15 yr old for 3 days? She needs to go to the Aunt’s too. That’s how they wild out. I know, i was 15

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3 days is a lot for a 15 yr old. Few hours is babysitting. Taking on a parental role for 3 days is a huge difference! Not to mention, if there was an emergency, she can’t drive. I’d say absolutely not. I cant say I’d leave my 23 month little boy with my sister (who is an adult) for 3 days.

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You are definitely in the right here. A 15 yr old has no business keeping a 2 yr old for days at a time. Do not let this happen. Horrible idea, hell the 15 yr old needs to go to the aunts too

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I would agree with mom, you need adult for a day.

I used to to it all the time at 15 BUT I also had to grow up faster and knew how to cook and take a bus. At 15 it was extremely stressful for me and honestly broke down a lot. I think your daughter should go to your aunts house for 3 days. It’s not a teenagers responsibility to take on such a huge responsibility. Your feelings are justified and you are not being paranoid

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I wouldnt want any 15 yearold to watch my kid 3 days. Shouldnt a 15 year old be in school? I think you answered your own questions. Stick to your guns mama bear. Not to mention just bc you plan on being in the hospital 3 days, what if there are complications?

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No…15 is too young for more than a couple of hours. Let your aunt watch her

Three days is too long for a teen to cope. If she takes day shift and aunt takes nights then maybe. I get trying to teach responsibility but that’s intense.

Erm he has two jobs now stop being mad and get happy again lmao if you don’t have or have had your own child you just cant not take care of one for more than a couple hours .maybeee she asked trying to be helpful but I’m sure she’ll understand

I wouldn’t even leave a 15 year old alone for that time with or with out a 2 year old in care.

I think it’s best they both go to your aunts

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Nope, not for 3 plus days.

I have two kiddos, 4 and 2. There’s no way I’d let a 15 year old watch them, for any amount of time. I know not everyone feels the same way but I just do not feel comfortable with someone so young. So… do not feel bad. You do what makes YOU feel comfy.

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My sister is 17 and I wouldn’t let her watch my daughter ( 2 and a half) more than one day

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I have questions. What about school? Who will watch toddler while she is either at or doing school?

I wouldn’t leave my 7 year old home with his 17 year old brother or 18 year old sister for 3+ days. It’s just not a smart idea. They aren’t parents and 3 days can be a lot.

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That’s way too young to have that much responsibility of a small child.

Um I say your aunt is the best choice !!!

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15 year olds get to distracted and two year olds find trouble.

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That is a lot for a 15 year old to handle. I really don’t think it’s fair to expect the 15 year old to do it. He’s being ridiculous.

I get it if you leave a 15 year old home alone, but it should only be for a hew hours. Not for 3+ days with a 2 year old! Send them both to the aunts house!

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No your right, you’ll be better taking your baby to your aunts it’ll be less worry for you, I know the feeling. It’s not because of the 15 year old, until she has her own child it is then she’ll know the responsibilities of having to look after a child not before. It’s so different when the baby is someone else’s coz the mumma beacon is not on that’s jus life

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I am the oldest child of 4 so I definitely had responsibilities growing up. When I was 15 my cousin asked if I could watch her twins for an evening and it was the absolute most miserable time of my life, they wouldn’t sleep they kept crying finally my mom came home from work and had to tell me that the babies- somewhere around 2 years old, needed something more to eat than just a bottle. I was a super responsible person, however I was NOT a mother!

I wouldn’t even leave my 18 year old daughter in charge of my 9 & 11 for a day much less more. And I certainly wouldn’t leave her with my 3 year old. NOPE. NOT happening. I trust my 18 year old… but she’s just that, 18. She’s still a damn irresponsible young person herself, no way I’d put that kind of responsibility on her and expect a good outcome. You are not paranoid. And he’s being completely insane.

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My oldest is 16 and there is no way I would leave my 2 y/o with her alone for more than a few hours let alone 3 days! That is too much responsibility for a 15 y/o period.

I think taking both to your aunt’s is the better choice for safety

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I honestly think your over reacting,if needed leave them 20$ and the teen can order pizza everyday for them to eat and 15 is plenty old enough to babysit that young,I’m married but when I was 15 I babysat for 2 weeks straight and didnt know how to cook anything. I’d have no problem with the teen watching my kid,I’d leave 20$ enough where they can have a pizza delivered everyday for 3 days to have food and everything else will be fine and if a emergency happened she can call 911. I’m not being mean but I think your be a little over reacting.

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I wouldn’t even leave my 16 y/o by herself for 3 days :woman_shrugging:t2:

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That’s not very fair to the 15 year old to have that kind of responsiblity. Even if they want to they have no idea what they’re really offering. I babysat at that age but not for 3 days. 2 year olds also push boundaries more usually when they know something’s up. You cant expect a 15 year old to keep a 2 year old on a good schedule either. 15 year old will be overwhelmed and the 2 year old will likely be a tyrant from having crap meals and poor sleep habits just in time for a new sibling to be introduced. That’s just a bad plan. Auntie sounds like a much better option :heartpulse:

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You are her mother and if you’re not comfortable, don’t do it. Listen to your instincts.

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Look up your state laws.

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You’re completely valid in your feelings. And you should not be worried about anything but having a healthy delivery. IMO
3 days is a lot for a 15 yr old.

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I absolutely agree with you. 3 days with a toddler is way too much for a 15 year old to handle with no transportation, being outside of town, and with all of your other reasons… I would definitely have to leave them with the Aunt for safety and peace of mind. You’re doing the right thing Momma, and dad will have to get over his attitude and realize what’s best for everyone is having them stay with a responsible adult who can properly care for them. :woman_shrugging:

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You are right. I’d be fine with her watching her for a couple hours but not 3 days. I can’t even see the girl being comfortable with it. That’s a BIG responsibility.

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Hell no not for three days. Let his ass be mad

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3 days is way to long for a 15 year old!

When I was 15 I had a son and babysat my 2 brothers and 2 step brothers without any problems. But every teen is different, if she doesn’t know how to cook then it wouldnt be a good idea that she watches her that long. Plus, she needs to be at school. So,I would have someone else watch both kids to make sure they’re both taken care of. But,I also havent heard of being at the hospital for 3+ days after giving birth, I’ve only known 2 days (unless theres complications), even with csection. My friend and I both had our daughters the same day, me natural and her csection and we left the same day

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Nope you’re are right.

I think 3+ days is to much. I wouldn’t let my 16yr old watch my other kids for that long. And they’re ,13 and 10. You ate definitely not being unreasonable

Pretty sure it’s not even legal but I would not leave a kid with no driving ability in charge that long.

I don’t trust my 15 year old with her 10 month old sister. She’s too busy on her phone and only takes her for 15 minutes sometimes. My 11 year old boy I trust more. Not for 3 days lol

Sounds like the 15 yo doesn’t want to go to the Aunt’s lol. They are both children and should not be left for 2-3 days. Not in this day and age/ Anything could happen. jeez Parent your kids.

He shouldn’t even be leaving his 15 year old alone for 3 days. He is unreasonable and I’d tell him he can be pissed. It’s really shitty of him to be making your last bit of pregnancy even more stressful with his crappy attitude and dumb ideas.

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You’re definitely right. A few hours sure, but even id start to crack being stuck home for 3 days alone with a toddler.

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Put your foot down. I wouldnt want it either. Jesus people are stupid. You have every right to be nervous

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He’s being a douche canoe in my opinion. 3 days is way too long to leave a 2 year old with a 15 year old. We aren’t talking about babysitting for a few hours. We’re talking about 3 whole days alone with no transportation outside of town. I think you have very valid reasons.

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There is no way I would leave any child with a 15 year old to babysit for 3 days. Date night…sure. In most states it’s not even legal to leave a child home in the care of a 15yr old overnight. So theres that. And let’s say something emergent DID happen, now you have a newborn and CPS involved. I’d let the aunt take her and have the daughter maybe come by every day for a few hours till help and give your aunt a break in the day.

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You’re not at all paranoid. You’re being very practical. A two year old is a lot to handle for anyone. The only free time the fifteen year old would have anytime to herself would be while the two year old is asleep. You are right.

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Didnt read rhe whole story…but you’ll be gone for 3 days anything can happen in that time a 15 year old is still a child and need supervision as well… leave your baby girl witg your Aunt.

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