YOU are the parent here! The boy is only 13 years old. I would be calling the girls parents and letting them know what’s going on and then talking to your son. That relationship needs to end, it’s not healthy at all!! Phone needs to disappear for a long time. Be a parent! Lord knows it’s hard but you have to protect your baby!
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My husband and i took our 13 yr old sons phone away and all internet access because he found porn and would not stop and the attitude and lack of respect and doing responsibilities was not okay. When he doesnt have access hes awesome, so we kind noticed ques when he was doing the searching. We gave him three different trys losing internet for months and then expecting him to comply with our rules. We get that hes a boy and is curious at this age however extremely innappropriate especially when he has 3 younger brothers and afraid of him exposing them to it at an inappropriate age. We even had him take a hammer to one of his phones previously because he would not stop. Wouldnt have been a huge problem if his entire search history was not just innapropriate things. He even found the incognito browser… so here we are a month in from his 3rd strike, and only internet he gets is for school in view of us and streaming videos in our front room from amazon netflix hulu and disney. Other than that he has access to dvds and a record player, yes vinyl records… lol
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My kids are not allowed to have boyfriend’s before the age of 16 
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Get your Son the baby doll that acts real .it won’t take him long to change up . Take away the phone when it’s off. No doll .Find a babysitting job !
That is the problem , 13 year olds are to young to be dating can’t handle rules , responsiblity and hormones
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Take the phone until he does his chores and homework then at bedtime. He only has it at school and after he does his chores and homework.
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Definitely Don’t leave them alone together ! Make sure he doesn’t send her any pictures of his private area because she seems like the type to blackmail him with it … Take his phone every night when you go to bed . I would contact her parents and if things don’t improve quickly put an end to this relationship.
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I have smart family set up on my phone for reasons like this. Its an amazing little app that you have control of his school nights and school days. Which means you can set the times of when he can’t or can be on the phone. My kids are 12,14,15 and 16.
Oh hell no. He is going to grow up and by 17 they’re all hormone crazy but this girl sounds like a bad influence so trust your gut and cut her out. You’re his parent not his friend so if he’s mad it’s okay. His brain isn’t grown enough yet to be in this situation. Parenting isn’t always fun. Take that phone away.
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My mom made me lay my phone on the kitchen bar at 9 every night. Okay, I did. What she didn’t know was, I had a phone a friend gave me that I’d just take the sim out of my regular phone and slip it in my back up phone.
Teens are smart and sneaky… I was. Especially when I started dating, I was open with my mom so she took me for birth control when I told her I was ready to start “experimenting.” She freaked a little, but she took the precautions because I told her I was ready, or thought I was… she talked with me like an adult, and it helped tremendously.
If his attitude gets worse, I’d take the phone to where he couldn’t talk to or see the girl unless he was at school and she was actually there. Because even if her number, social media is blocked, they can and will find a way around it. 
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She seems like a bad influence. Cut that shit off now before something more permanent happens
You need to turn that phone off.
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He is 13. You are the mom. Take his phone away. A phone is a privilege not a right. Have some serious talks about appropriate behavior and what love really is. Better to let him be mad for a while than to be tricked into something he is not ready for or has dire consequences. She is a very sick little girl girl acting out very strangely for any girl.let alone a 13 yr. Old. No improvement on his part no more phone.
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Ya I’d be taking that phone away
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I would put restrictions on his phone
Monitor the internet usage
Change the wifi password and don’t give it to him until his chores and “family time” are done, and only for a length of time.
Girls like that get very bored easily, especially if she’s not getting the responses she wants, as upsetting as it will be, she will break up with him and she will move onto someone else.
If eventually it gets to much, and you want to contact her parents
Make sure you have some kind of solid proof - as any parent wouldn’t react well if another parent came up accusing their child of something.
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So are you the parent or not? Step tf up and stop letting him get away with this crap. Take his phone away permanently.
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If its an android install parent link! That way you can set bed times and won’t have to worry about it.
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My first response is he is 13. I have a set rule no dating till 16 and that fixes a lot of problems, the next thing I do not allow cell phones in bedrooms. My last and final response is he is the child and your the adult, so their is no debate.
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Are u seriously in doubt as to what to do first off take the phone period then speak to her parents lastly discipline your child wtf u mean scared to push him away he is a fucking child whats gonna happen if he gets her pregnant will u feel better act now act tough the end.
- these are children
- this is a bad influence on your child and affecting your household
- children like that are not allowed to be around my family
- take the phone with you every night
- call me whatever u want but I’ll be damned if id let another child affect mine like that. It would be forbidden and cut off. They do not know better than you currently and are not at the maturity level to make those decisions. That chick would be GONE, along with the phone for a while for good measure
I’ve hadto reset my child in situations like these a few times and whilst it was hell going through it initially I was always glad I did and wondered why I didn’t do it sooner, because I also share the same sentiments about giving children their space and allowing them to become their own person. But sometimes they just won’t make the right decisions and you have to do it for them
Take the phone away get rid of the girlfriend
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take the phone away completely untill his attitude changes. if he feels like he needs to be disrespectful to his mother then take the phone or any electronics away.
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Tell her mom what her daughter is doing and saying
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Take that phone and smash it.
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It really sucks as us parents have kids know right from wrong. We try to teach them respect and goals and how to be a kid! Some parents don’t give a crap what there kids do! And then we have to worry about that pressure for our kids! I wouldn’t let him have the phone at all until he gets that trust and respect back.
Ummmm, I’d be having a conversation with this girl’s parents first and foremost. Second, you’re gonna have to swallow the pill and be the bad guy, take his phone, permanently, too many parents are trying to be friends with thier children, that will come in time but right now he needs you to be a parent. If he gets mad good, he’s not supposed to like it but you have to set boundaries before he makes a life changing mistake.
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The phone would be gone and I’d be contacting the girlfriends parents and making them aware of her actions as well. Yikes. He’s 13.
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He loses his phone, he’s grounded and that little manipulative brat he calls a girlfriend is gone out of his life
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Holy cow, 13??? Good God, step up and whoop his a$$ for one. Second, take away the damn phone and start grounding. Find time to be a parent and give those kids the attention they need instead of electronics. Unless you are ready to be a gramma
take the phone at nites. ur the parent. shit! my son is 40 something n im still the boss when he comes here. what i say goes. i disconnect wifi manually if shit happens.
Omg shes is not healthy who cares if u push him away from u it wont last long get that toxic girl away from ur son before hes stuck with that forever he should be in a healthy relationship and thats not it
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Fuck that , he needs the chancla and his phone taken away. 
Maybe have a talk with the girlfriends parent too.
As for your son take his phone away. Until he realized you mean business.
Instal a spy app on his phone see what that girl saying to him.evwn if u take the phone he’ll find a way to still talk to you and it gives the crazy girlfriend leverage to try to turn him against you.
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If she is saying and doing these things at 13, how far do you think she’ll go in the future? Something is not right. That little girl has had something happen to her to make her think that is what love is, and none of it is healthy… talk to the parents and get a feel for them. Something there is not right.
As for your son, I’m only 25 and have a 5 year old daughter but sit down with him and maybe really explain where you are coming from… the changes in attitude and demeanor, that you worry about him and his future, and let him know that things must change and he needs to use his head or maybe there will be no dating until he is older? He is being manipulated far too easily.
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Your only hearing one side remember that if you take the phone go through it see if it’s just her maybe it’s not I was doing alot worse at 13 lol 
just teach him his self worth I hope you answered honestly what happens when you knock someone up drill safe sex in his head the stricter it gets sometimes the worse it gets so don’t go to crazy you know what he can handle before he starts rebelling
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Phone would be gone completely lol.
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Been there, done that!!! Hold strong to your principles and dont give in…teenage years with boys is long and hard on mamas…hang in there, they need guidance and do grow up and make you proud!!!
I know you want to be that supportive mom but now you have to be the mom! He is 13. The fact that he has asked about getting her pregnant, means that they are considering having sex. He is only 13. I think you need to be more firm. I am sorry but you have given him too much freedom
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I am sorry but why does your 13 year old have a smart phone? I understand anymore they are what people use but he is 13. At 13 I had a flip phone and didnt have free calls unless it was to people approved by my parents. If I wanted to use social media I had to use the computer. As for the girlfriend situation if he is going to have a bad attitude about her then she needs to go. I also feel you should sit him down and teach him about emotional abuse. You feel he is old enough to start dating then he needs to know the signs of an abusive relationship.
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Wow! This is a difficult situation. Maybe you should reach out to the girls parents. See if they can get through to her. She honestly sounds like a brat.
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Um you need to grow up! He’s 13 years old! Shut it down and be a parent.
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Take the phone the end
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Oh wow. I’d be calling her parents and addressing that. If it didn’t change he wouldn’t be dating her. Sorry, your grades better be perfect before you even think about girls. 
No one wants someone without a future plan.
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You need to be more strict. Take the phone away every night so he has no access to it. If he gets an attitude then keep it for a day or 2. Talk to the girls parents about it all especially her being inappropriate
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Make him put his phone up each night at bedtime. Not in his room but in your room or maybe in a common area like the kitchen. No phone after school until homework and chores are done. Take the phone away if his grades decline or if he’s not keeping up with schoolwork. Everyday that he’s running late on purpose, don’t let him take the phone to school or if he needs to take it to school, take it away for the day. He’ll learn real quick. If you tell him that you don’t want him dating her, it will make him want to date her even more because it’s forbidden. Then he’ll date her behind your back and possibly sneak around. Watch it though, because kids are sneaky as hell and will find or borrow any device to be able to talk to people. (Think old phones you may have laying around that can connect to WiFi, or computers.) Teach him about safe sex. Most importantly, teach him that if someone loves him, they won’t pressure him into doing bad things. Silly, such as the water pouring, maybe, but bad things, no. Teach him about abuse in all forms. Teenage years are very trying and stressful as a parent. But, they can also be hard on kiddos with hormones, peer pressure, and trying to adjust and figure things out. Maybe talk to him about how he makes you feel when he talks to you like crap. And, tell him how much you love him! You’re definitely not alone!! Good luck, Mama!!!
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Reach out to the girls parent(s). Collect evidence, you need their help.
Put parental controls on the phone where it does not work at all during certain hours or take it away completely. You are the patent act like one. Be a bitch put your foot down contact her parents they might need a heads up.
With my son, 15, I am very upfront with him, always have been. He knows that I do phone checks constantly. I literally will just walk in and pick it up. He also knows that I can see if he has deleted messages and such so don’t try it! We have had the talk with him more than once. He also has younger siblings (7 and 3) so he can see how much a baby takes. He is a very responsible young man, who dates responsible girls. But he also knows that if ever sends something to another person that is inappropriately not only would he be in hot water with me, but could also face legal issues.
Personally his phone would be gone and a conversation with that girls parents would have occurred already though. She sounds manipulative and like she is grooming him
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I have 2 sons and never had a problem cuz when they were little I put the fear of God in them by instant harsh reasoning and in teenage years they were good didn’t have children till they were over 20
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Yeah that “ relationship” would be DONE ! 13 years old & talking about getting his gf pregnant… OH HELL NO !
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When I had a cellphone in my teens my phone had to be on the charger in the kitchen by 9:00 pm . My parents didn’t play around ! If I disobeyed them I would lose the phone & privileges!
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No girlfriends and no phones!! PERIOD!!
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He knows the rules. Take the phone away. You have to have a consequence otherwise he will walk all over you.
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It sounds like it could get dangerous by her making him do things"if you love me" thats something to be cautious of.
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Take the phone away until he can change his attitude and get his things done and have her come over to your house and have a talk with her about her behavior at such a young age maybe she doesn’t have anyone to look up to in her home life… also explain to your son that even though your sending these photos or videos to only her there is ways to save them and share them to other people
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13 years old should be focused on school and sports, NOT girlfriends/boyfriends, love, and worrying about getting her pregnant. He’s not mature enough to have a phone but this goes way deeper than the gf. He needs to not be a follower or get pressured into things or this is going to get real bad real quick with other things.
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Take that phone away and send that kid to therapy so someone on the outside can clue him in on how her behavior can hurt him and hurt her. Last thing you need is a grand child with that little she demon. Who knows why she behaves that way but she was probably taught it or shown it and you can’t control what she does but you can control the amount of contact she has with your own child. He may hate you at first but he will get over that.
Phones have parental controls under settings that you set with a pin. My daughter’s phone automatically turns all apps off at 9 p.m every week night.
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You may need some professional help !
He must realize that he’s being bullied, or manipulated, like a puppet, if she drops him ( and you haven’t enlisted professional help ) he may become depressed, and possibly suicidal, this could be serious, not just puppy love, infatuation ??
You’re his parent, not his friend. Period.
I understand being scared to “push him away” but your job is to teach him respect, healthy relationships, work ethic and so on. It sounds like he needs to be protected from this girl, whether he sees it right now or not. Is he going to be mad at you? Probably.
Will you both be thankful for it later on when he’s old enough to understand and you’re not raising your grandchild? Absolutely.
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Be the parent and take the phone away until he changes his attitude and does his chores. If he can’t act right or do the chores he’s supposed to then he doesn’t get the privileges of a kid who earns phone time.
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Take 
The Phone Away
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This is a worry…this girl sounds bad…she could be selling those photos of your son…
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I would have a talk with him and go ahead and show him all the wonderful pictures of STDs and remind him that what she is saying to him she could have said to someone else and this could happen to him. She may not even know because some diseases don’t have symptoms. Show him the STD rates for your area. I would also talk about healthy relationships and things to talk about and do other than sexual. Then I would set up a meeting with the parents and the daughter together and call it all out. Showing the pictures and reading aloud the texts to her parents in front of her so everyone is on the same page and she can defend herself if needed. Then I would remind everyone that this matter is black and white. Your minor child is being sexually exploited and it is your legal obligation to report the behavior if needed. If not, you could be held criminally as well for allowing him to be abused. And HER parents as well now that they have been informed. For the safety of your son, you are letting them know their daughter is to no longer have contact with him or the authorities will be called. People get caught up in emotions when the law is the law. I’m sure the parents wouldn’t want to go there.
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First mistake letting your 13 year old start dating. 
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Take the phone away now and talk to him about peer pressure, emotional abuse (if you don’t do this it means you don’t love me), talk to him about consent as well.
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My son would be visiting a boot camp for the summer if he ever talked to me like that. You created this monster. You need to put your foot down and get him separated from her at all costs.
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Umm don’t let him date til he’s outta your house! Take the phone away. You are his friend. Be the parent you are!
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Amy Rachel Jarvis now seeing someone else go through it is scary
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Get him out of that relationship before the damage is done! My younger brother was in the same situation same ages… they ended up having a baby young. She moved into my nans with him, they had no money but my nan supported them and paid for the babies needs, she even had the baby most nights. The girl mentally and physically abused my brother and attacked my mum when she tried to stick up for him! He turned against his family and bent over back wards to please her. She went off with his best mate before the baby’s first birthday he has seen the baby once since! She uses the baby as a weapon and even tho they have not been together she taunts him through messages! This girl told him to kill himself and tried to ruin his life and almost succeeded. He is now in a better place and with help taking her to court to see his son! If there is any chance you can get through to your son do it before it’s too late… so much damage can be done at this vulnerable young age 
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I honestly feel like this is me writing the exact same thing. My now 16 year old asd son started dating a girl last year when he was 15. Straight away she was disrespectful and rude. She would refuse to accept the rules in my house and would be calling all hours of the night. She would constantly call and harass him. She controlled him with everything he did, he wasn’t even allowed to have family time because she didn’t approve. Her parents allowed her to act like this, she obviously is in charge of her household and they let it happen. She physically forced herself onto my son and when he refused she started punching him in the head. She also tried to get me done for child abuse to cover her abusive behaviour and to get back at me for restricting the amount of time he was allowed to spend with her.
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I would put a stop to the whole thing and make my 13 year old be a 13 year old CHILD.
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She sounds toxic…best to educate him
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13 years old is way to young to be allowed dating… He shouldn’t be worried about dating, he should be spending time with his friends and family. You are his mom, you need to tell him that what she is doing is highly inappropriate and unacceptable! You need to talk to her parents! Maybe her parents aren’t aware of her behavior. She sounds like she needs help. Please don’t let your son date her!
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My son has counselling and I sent my son away for a week to stay with family friends, it helped us a lot and he finally saw how awful she was. I hope you have a good outcome!
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So as a parent how did you prepare him for the teenage years? Surely you knew they were coming? It seems to me the girl is instructing him and teaching him more than you , the mother. You don’t tell us how you have had conversations with him about girls etc… Anyway, I wish you all the best. Sad that I didn’t even hear of a male figure in his life. This thing has so many layers to it and I find you not to be proactive. Just my thoughts…
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For all those saying take the phone away, let me just say I tried that. Had punishment for my teen who was texting/calling gf to all hours cause that’s what the gf needed to help her sleep. Fast forward after a year of finding new phones, devices and punishments of no social media or contact outside school and trying to have hear to hearts about healthy relationships and setting boundaries has done nothing but push my child away from me. The gf even had the gall to message me and ask when they would be getting contact back. After being together for more than 18 months and being 17, nothing has helped the situation, sometimes the more you push, the more they want to do it. These days there are ways to get to social media (school library PCs, friends phones, iPods etc) and they can contact their gf, it’s better to keep communication lines open between son and mother and encourage healthy relationship goals, maybe invite the gf over and see how she treats you and have social outings with family so he isn’t being isolated to just her and her demands. Good luck xx
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He is 13! Seriously he doesn’t need a phone 24 /7 . They have parental controls on the phone accounts set it up up to shut it off at a certian time He is to young to be dating and having that kind of relationship. Put your foot down, set some boundaries and rules. You are the parent he is the child.
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Tatyana Alexandrovna Yuryeva I don’t think 13 years old is too young, kids will have boyfriends or girlfriends at school at that age for sure, I had my first boyfriend at 12 & a lot of the other kids at school were the same, it’s not uncommon behaviour and by restricting things then it will just make him want to do it more. Could you talk to him about how this is making you feel? Kids don’t particularly enjoy upsetting their parents so if he knows how you feel he might see it from a different perspective? I agree it is definitely worrying and kids at that age are so easily influenced by their peers and their hormones are everywhere so it can be difficult. Sorry I don’t have much advice for you but good luck xx
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You’re the parent. No phone. No dating
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Talk, talk, talk… please just sit down and talk openly with your son about everything… sex, love, pressure, stress… this girl saying that if he loved her he would do this or that for her??? Well honestly…start with that but be open to his side and listen to his opinions and if he has a valid point then concede. Let him know that you are willing to meet him half way but he has to start going back to school because if she loved him she would want the best chance for him to have a good future. You and your husband love him but do you tell him that if he loved you that he would do his chores etc. NO, you don’t because that’s wrong. Love should never be used as a weapon to get someone to do something. Listen to your instincts. You have a good boy there. If you handle it right you will keep him. Remember that you are the parent, not him but he needs to learn how to handle these situations because this won’t be his first, he’s sure to run into more because he sounds like a really nice young man. You can do it.
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Talk to your son. Honest conversation about relationships, manipulation etc
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I didn’t even get past the first 3 lines. A 13 year old has no business dating anyone! You should have set these ground rules years ago! That’s a firm no in this house!!
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Lori Bloss and Tanya Dorrington I disagree. Saying kids are going to do whatever they want so you might as well let them, to me, isn’t a good idea. If they were getting drunk, or high would you go ahead and buy them alcohol and drugs? I don’t know about you Tanya, but Lori and I definitely did, and I don’t think our mom’s supplying it would have been a good idea. What if your kids were sneaking out at midnight to go to parties in town with older men who wanted them to strip for money? (we definitely DIDN’T do that lol) Unless you’re going to chain them to the bed, they’ll find a way to sneak out, so are you going to drop them off, or simply ignore it? The truth is the internet is way more dangerous than us talking on the phone or passing notes to friends when were that age. I agree a lot the notes we passed, and the people we talked to were not good, but our parents were parents. We had rules, and if we got caught there were consequences. I’m not sure how society has gotten to the point where a woman is saying her son is being disrespectful, and talking about sex, and wanting to skip school, and not doing chores, and the answers are “talk to him” or there’s basically nothing you can do! Be parents people! Our kids are figuring out right from wrong from your rules! A teenager is not mature enough to make these decisions. Put limits on the phone, and if his attitude doesn’t change, take the stupid thing away. If he wants to see this girl she can come over to your house and if she’s disrespectful, tell her to go home. Another thing, for all of you saying kids have changed. We used to go outside and play ball with our friends and we would never talk to adults like that, or whatever, the fact of the matter is kids haven’t changed, parents have. If you love your kids you have to have rules and consequences. Kids are learning how to make good decisions, and right from wrong from you. Being a good parent is not giving up or doing what’s easy. It’s making sure they are safe, guiding them, and taking control. Teenagers are not mentally or emotionally equipped to make all their own decisions. They need to trust their parents to teach and be in control for them until they are old enough and mature enough to do it on their own.
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Take phone away completely inform the girlfriends parents of the behavior and go from there. Even try talking to the school about helping them stay separated
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take the phone and tell that girl to leave my son alone…if it still continues I will be taking a drive to her house to tell her parents the type of stuff she is doing…
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First, the phone would be gone. Second, I would speak to the girl’s parents and make them aware of what’s going on. I work in a juvenile detention center and have students who are in there because of “sexting”…they have charges of child pornography and will need to register as a sex offender until age 30. It’s serious. Please don’t wait to address this.
I agree with alot of other moms on this page. Open lines of communication. At the age of 13 I had a boyfriend. But express how you feel but listen to his side as well. Maybe have his dad or if his dad isn’t in the picture maybe have a good family friend (male) or a grandparent or someone sit down and talk to him. It may be easier for them to talk as sometimes it’s easier for boys to talk to other males. Have them talk about healthy relationships but keeping school and home life as a priority.
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Block her number. Its your phone bill, your house.
I’d talk to them, I’d expailn to him that that’s not what a gf is supposed to do! She sounds like a parents nightmare gf! I would explain to ur son that good gfs don’t make u do things “if u love them” you need to help him understand that before she gets him to do something he can’t come back from
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There seem to be a lot of people on here that forget what it was like to be a teenager. I agree with taking the phone away at night and talking to her parents about what she has been saying but at the end of the day your teen is in a new phase of life that’s a little scary for moms because they feel like they are losing control. The more you try to force them apart the more you will drive a wedge between you and your son. Punishments never worked for me as a teen, it made me want to stick it to my mom and do the exact opposite of what she wanted. It also made me a very good liar. (Teen boys have raging hormones too, maybe he is just telling you that she is making him do these things when in truth it is a two person game) Now my mom and I have a good relationship and I am able to tell her about everything because she stopped trying to control every aspect of my life. I think the best thing to do is talk to your son and explain your fears and why you are implementing rules. And maybe talk to his girlfriend too. At 13 she might not be around for long. For most people the first love is not forever love.
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Talk to him about controlling behaviors. That’s what she’s doing. I had this talk with my oldest about his friends. And contact her parents. If they’re doing their jobs, they should care and react to the situation.
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Take the phone away completely. They don’t need a phone at that age.
First of all don’t talk to her parents she is not your problem, you can’t go around talking to every kids parents for your safety, second give him condoms tel him how important safe sex is sexual transmitted disease 
third your son is going threw puberty don’t make his life miserable talk to him have fun with him give him his space and privacy encourage him to go out and have fun.
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Call that girls parents
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I would be talking to her parents about what she telling him about her coochie. This girl is TROUBLE
Educate your son on codependent relationships and controlling behavior so he can see what she’s doing…
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Take that shit away it would last two minutes with mine. Or one day. There choice lol
Take his phone away at night. No phone till chores are complete, he’s rude to siblings, he loses phone for next 24 hours. Caught sending inappropriate videos, loses phone for a week. He definitely wouldn’t be going anywhere with said"girlfriend" and I would explain to him that people that truly love you, don’t put conditions on it. If she " loved" him, she wouldn’t say those things.
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