my significant other gives me affection emotionally and physically but sometimes I don’t feel like it’s enough (Im super touchy feely and they aren’t) and I know it shouldn’t always come from them. they like affection in different ways from me and I feel like what they provide according to their “love language” is a lot. What can I do to fill this emptiness for myself instead of trying to get it from them?
Help a mama out and respond anonymously on our forum. I feel like my partner doesn't love me enough: Advice?re
You keep saying they or them is this their pronouns or is there more then one? Have you talk to them and expressed your feelings and your love language so maybe they can try to change it.
Who’s they ? Have you got multiple?
I’m a lot the same my partner isn’t really overly affectionate like I am so I try my best to understand how they feel and communicate how I feel and she tends to be more affectionate to me when I feel I need more
Just gonna have to talk to him. Communication is the key. Unsatisfied relationships don’t last
It sounds likes it’s just not their love language find what it is to make them happy.
Buy an adult toy and use adult videos… lol jk light some candles run yourself a hot bubble bath turn off the lights put on good music pour a glass of wine and kick back. Lose your eyes and relax
Maybe you need to step back and look at your feelings towards them. If its only about your needs then you’re missing the picture.
You knew before you got with that person though.
They don’t know you need a touchy feely type of relationship based on your post. They may be more touchy feely than they show but don’t want to come off as needy which is probably why you aren’t making it known what you like, to avoid seeming needy. They’re not going to read your mind. Do you at least drop hints or?
We all love and show our affection differently and there’s nothing wrong with that.
You can talk to your partner about your feelings but seems like you are the one with the problem / issues , maybe you are a little insecure and that’s why you demand/ expect more from your partner , try loving your self more so you can fill what your partner is not
It sounds so simple but my boyfriend bought me a big bear that fits on the bed but I love cuddling with it, it’s nice when I need a hug and he’s not around or I wanna be clingy I love it
Read Insecure in Love, everyone should!
Adopt a dog, they’ll fill your need for extra attention.
Work on your confidence.
Buy a weighted blanket! They are so handy when you need a hug or comfort!
Schedule a self care day every week. Nails, toes, spa, etc. Communicate. If these two don’t work, you may as well be by yourself ijs.
LOVE comes in many forms explore that.
They? Is he gender confused or you just wording it wrong? Either way…there should be only 2 of you in your relationship …. Communication is key and if he… they…. Don’t care about your feelings and there’s no compromise then it’s pointless. I’m in a relationship with a man that is rarely lovey dovey…. It’s REALLY hard for me because I’m affectionate to the man I’m in love with. Just hugging is a chore for him unless he’s in the mood. I get where you’re coming from… but I knew what I was getting into and I still couldn’t let go. Now 5 years in and it’s getting easier. I can’t imagine my life without his stubborn cocky sarcastic ass … I want him all the time and he’s not as sexual as me but it’s amazing when he does give it lol he’s also 5 years older then me maybe that makes a difference I don’t know… he’s my best friend though … I was married to an overly affectionate guy for 20 years but ya know what? He was abusive too… a drunk a mean drunk. He told me he loved me everyday and he still abused me and cheated on me. The man I’m with now I really enjoy my time with we laugh and joke all the time we just click. He doesn’t say I love you … maybe 3 times in 5 years … but he shows it: I’ll take that. Just gotta weigh the good with bad. Really search your heart and know his. Good luck.
Communicate! Talk to your so about what you need.
Some people dont like to be hung on all the time.And its a huge turn off when a partner feels like thats the only way to show feelings.You need to be with someone who is as affectionate as you.
Adopt a dog. It’s amazing how they can fill up that void. They have so much love to give. And they love you, no matter what.
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Open communication. Also if therapy is an option go for that. Journaling can be helpful , if writing isn’t ur thing, there are apps where they give prompts. U can send stuff to urself on fb messenger. (I’ve kept notes on writing and used it to journal when not near mine) if u use ur phone voice to text is an option (I have adhd and that’s great when my thoughts are to fast for my fingers)
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Find new ways to boost your self confidence. Develop hobbies. Find new things to try. Appreciate your partners efforts, communicate w them more on things you would like for them to do if you feel like they have been slacking/needing to improve in a certain area but Other than that… don’t drain your partner and make your happiness and security their responsibility . (People) Men don’t typically like being smothered up on and having to consistently reassure someone becomes a turn off in the Long run. If you trust your partner that speaks a lot in itself.
I’m a needy person at times, so I understand. My dogs bring me a lot of comfort. If my husband isn’t home, or isn’t feeling cuddly, I just cuddle one or both of my dogs, & I feel better.
Do you have animals?
Who are “They” you keep referring to?
Read codependent no more and ask your individual therapist if they can go thru the workbook with you
Join the club that’s why more women r lesbians
Are you a Christ follower? Accept Jesus into your life today. He loves you always and forever. That empty spot will be filled!!
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My wife’s love language is physical touch and I absolutely hate being touched I do however have times where it’s ok for a little bit
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I am still trying to figure out how many ‘they’ are? Or ‘them’??? She is talking about !!!
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Learn about yourself through councelling.
Tell them what you need, and ask what they need. We tend to love how we want to be loved. However we should love according to how our partner needs to be loved. Like for me I need verbal reassurance, and words of affirmation in addition to physical touch. So I am constantly saying I love you and touching my husband. Whereas he prefers acts of service and quality time. So he makes time for me and is constantly doing things for me, making coffee, grabbing my favorite dinner etc. We had along discussion about it and we realized we thought we were doing what we needed to do but we were doing what we wanted from the other. We have been more intentional about it.
Gotta find someone who matches your vibes and needs
I used to be that way. Then I got traumatized and had therapy for a decade. Now I don’t want anyone touching me, ever.
Be happy.be thankful. You could have a partner who is a narracist.
If you’ve talked through this with them and it isn’t possible for them to meet your needs, you may want to consider a poly relationship.
I think perhaps therapy would help. It sounds like you need to learn how to love and appreciate yourself with out needing a ton of attention. You need to learn you don’t need a reminder of constantly being showed affection or being showed or told you are good enough. Ma’am you are good enough and loved you just have to see it for yourself. Much love sent your way
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