I feel my sons pre-school is trying to push too much on him: Advice?

I’m a first-time mom, and my son is three he started pre k this year and is the youngest in his class. He’s very smart and learns quickly, but the school sent home a paper stating that they want our kids to know what a fire escape route is and how to use it and to learn the pledge of allegiance. I have no issues what so ever with this, but I feel that this is asking a lot out of 3 and 4 years old, and I don’t know how to go about helping my son learn this for school. Are any other parents concerned with how much schools are pushing on to our children all at once in pre k? Side note: he goes to school from 8 am-2 pm Monday-Friday just like the bigger schools. When I was in pre k, it was four days a week for 3 hours.


My five year old has to memorize a bible verse a week for school. What we do to accomplish that is break it down into sections and go over in the morning, in the car and in the evening. She normally has it down by Wednesday. I would suggest that for memorizing the pledge.

You should read about how to break down stuff that is hard to remember and do it everyday and he will get use to it.

You could try making it into a song so he can learn it a little bit easier. Make it fun, so he won’t get bored or feel like you’re torturing him trying to make him memorize all those words lol. Teaching him the fire escape route at home would also be helpful. It’s definitely good for him to know that. That’s something you can definitely go over with him, and practice every so often just to make sure he knows what to do if ever anything does happen. It’s not as stressful as you’re thinking it’s going to be. Relax. You got this.

Schools are a much faster pace now than what they used to be. Kids leaving Kindergarten having to read 26 site words and write simple sentences. Gone are the days of finger paints and nap time. For teaching him the pledge, just say it with him over and over… the same way they learn all those annoying songs. The Fire escape plan is necessary at soon as they can walk and understand safety. Just talked to him about what he should do and where he needs to go incase of a fire. To many kids that age have died because they hide out of fear.

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As far as the fire escape plan absolutely every child should know basic safety and how to get out of the house safely and a safe meeting place. As far as the pledge of allegiance that will come in time they say it every day he’ll just be able to remember it one day without even thinking twice about it


We had a similar issue. My daughter hated it, they deemed her a “problem child” I have a son in kinder and they were giving her homework in vpk that he couldn’t even do. So we switched her and it’s much better and appropriate! She enjoys school now and isnt a problem child.

That is alot of school for a 3 year old… i hope its play based… usually here at 3 unless its daycare kids go 2 days or 3 for 3 hours.

Good grief… Are they intending to run out of the building and leave him to figure it out on his own if there’s a fire? That does sound like a lot for a 3 year old to firmly grasp. I get teaching about smelling smoke, seeing smoke get on the floor, touching doors before opening etc. But how is a 3 year old supposed to navigate escape routes and contingency plans?


It’s amazing how much kids can pick up in a short time.
Honestly, the evacuation route is important though. My kids are 13 and 15 and I still ask them periodically “what would you do if…”
When they were little it was factual discussion, trying not to scare them.


It also may help if the local fire department comes with one of their trucks and some fire fighters to help explain fire safety. It will be more memorable and maybe they can teach it in a way all the kids can understand… Like the buddy system stuff!

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Do the pledge of allegiance every morning. He’ll pick up on it. I never had to deal with the fire escape plan thing. But i do think its a good thing to learn.


My 3 year old memorized an entire Lizzo song :joy::joy: give your kid more credit!


That is definitely NOT too hard on a 3/4 year old!


Uh…I’m sure he will catch on. I remember having to do that in prek. Give him more credit than that. :neutral_face::expressionless:

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The pledge and a fire drill aren’t exactly astrophysics. Kids can memorize anything with repetition. Most know the ABC song at this age and that’s longer than the pledge.


All of that is reasonable. All schools say the Pledge. He will eventually learn it. Fire safety is important. Our fire safety plan is if there’s a bad fire inside the house, get outside and we all meet in the driveway.

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I had a special needs preschool route. They can learn a lot more than we give them credit for. They were telling me how many buses were at the school, if some left, they would do the subtraction, and tell me how many were left. I taught them left and right sides, by the turns on my route. Your kid can learn. Believe. They are little sponges

For a fire plan keep it simple. Just say “mommy wants to teach you about fires. They are dangerous and very hot, you never ever touch. If you ever see a fire you need to get down and crawl, and go to ___ door” and then I guarantee he will probably ask you a million times about it, he will learn lol my daughter prompted me with a fire escape plan without me ever mentioning it. For the pledge, make it a little jingle and repeat repeat repeat

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The fire escape route can just be done daily til they get it. The other stuff is typical…

Every child that’s old enough for preK should have a fire escape plan at home. Being in EMS I can’t stress this enough! So many children die in house fires and we always ask “did you have a fire escape plan?” The answer is always NO. I’ve seen 3 year olds that do have a plan make it out and be at their designated meeting spot as well.
Also on the part that you feel it’s too much… you’re gonna have to let that part go. Kids learn so fast and so much it’s hardly ever too much. If he’s a quick learner like you claim then it shouldn’t be an issue. But this is hardly “too much”. This is two things. It’s one very important life saving thing!
I’ve been in and around EMS/fire for long enough to tell you I’ve seen my fair share of child deaths. It’s very important to teach this. Dismissing it as too much for a child to grasp is pretty much signing their death certificate. Teach them this! Please! I’ve seen MANY 3 year olds make it out of house fires because they had an escape plan. I’ve also seen their little bodies curled up under their beds in the fetal position because they were too scared to get out.

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3 years old isn’t to young to learn a fire escape route safety first… my son is soon to be 4 and his preschool is teaching them fire escape routes… but me and his father are firefighters so he learns different ways to escape everyday Incase of an emergency… the pledge of allegiance I can’t see 3/4 year olds learning that just yet but that’s just me my son wouldn’t understand nor be able to say the words (he slightly speech delayed)

Make it a game, but also informative. You never know if there will be a fire in the future and he may need to get out on his own in the event you can’t get to him. As far as the pledge, practice with him in the morning every day before school and he’ll know it in no time. I learned it by doing it every morning at school.

Your son will learn the pledge from muscle memory. The more he says it the more he’ll know it.

Learning a fire escape route isn’t a bad idea. Heaven forbid a fire started he would need to react.

I taught my kids fire safety when my son was two and daughter 1 she didnt get it yet but he did , I started by pushing the alarm at dif times and we would all go out side to the swing set . I would take my daughter and he would hurry out with us . One day while my daughter was in her Walker I set tbe alarm he ( before I could get to them ) grabbed he Walker and drug it outside and down tbe steps it was scary but cute and wow he was quick , had that been a real fire he would have got his sister out . I kept the drills going thu high school , day night , while showers ect especially when friends stayed over . I even would put fake paper flames on doors so the had to find other ways out ect . My kid were fire ready . Just start with getting him used to going to the safe spot when he hear the alarm . If they dont know what to do they will panic and run toward you and that might not be safe . I was lucky and had a fenced yard so I knew they were safe going out side .

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The pledge is fun we did a game like slug bug but when in the car when you see a flag you put your hand on your chest and say the pledge, the whole car would join in . They start to look for flags and soon can say the pledge no problem.

3&4 yr olds are very smart. They know and can retain more information than you may think. My son’s whole class knows the pledge of allegiance, the fire escape plan, 911 emergency, their address n phone numbers, etc. They are sponges at that age.

My son knew that at 3. They say the pledge everyday there that’s why they want you to practice it. They are smart for their age. And just explain.about a fire route at home. I know hes your baby but hes growing up. He needs to learn and grow too

We dont give kids enough credit. They are a LOT smarter than we think.


I put my son in preschool at age 3 because he has speech apraxia and he went 2 days a week for 2 hours at a time. Now he’s 4 and he goes 3 days a week for 2.5 hours at a time. I think that’s too long of a day for your child. Unless you work and need him there you should keep him home with you. :heart:Teach him yourself and send him back when he’s 4. Before u know it he will be going all day in kindergarten and continue till he graduates!

In a threes teacher and you’d shocked how much their brains absorb. I think these are great things for him to know actually. And if I sing a song twice my kids have it memorized.

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That is just a normal routine in school.


Here, private schools are shorter days, but public pre-K is all day. I have three kids and I hate how much work they put on them outside of school. Repetition is key with things like that. I don’t think those are excessive for him at that age. Kids absorb and learn the most at those ages.

Honestly you don’t have to send your kid to school until kindergarten or first grade


My Son is 3 and is in Pre k Mon-Fri for 3 hours a day. He already knew about fire alarms and putting out fires. From watching the Kid version of YouTube. We have it set to his age range.
Personally I think it’s a good thing that the kids have knowledge of everything even if they are not interested.

this is absolutely “not too much” for a 3-4 year old to learn. ALL kids should know a fire escape plan from wherever they spend time, including home. You should be practicing that with them as soon as the age of understanding. They can understand at 3 how to crawl low to the floor and get to a safe escape. Lather, rinse, repeat until it sinks in. And learning the pledge of allegiance is fairly simple memorization—they don’t have to be perfect.

He will learn the pledge with the class. That can’t possibly be a requirement though. They are going to punish a 3 year old if they can’t or don’t? That’s a little ridiculous if so. As far as the home plan for a fire, odd if they require it, but is a good idea. I had a child in my 3’s class that would hide for drills. Going over the plan can help them in case of a real emergency.

If it’s that much of a concern keep him home one more year and work with him on that time yourself in learning the pledge and learn escape routes is very important even at home. If there was ever an emergency then it could save his life.

We make it a game with the fire safety but we’ve always taught ours about it. As far as the Pledge, sing it in the car, while making dinner, during baths.

Too much and I feel he’s too little to be going to school

This is part of sending your child to Preschool. Educational institutions have to have something to show for their time now. Parents and the government are expecting more and more of little ones and this is the outcome.

I have a small home daycare and homeschool my own children. Studies show that children learn best and enjoy learning the most when it’s done through play. They also show that the geniuses that memorized the names of the states and the kid who spent their 3 year old year building towers with wooden blocks and playing outside all level up at around age 7 or 8. I do play based learning with my little ones until they reach age 4. If they stay for their 4 year old year, I do about 30 minutes of focused learning time (letters, numbers, writing, early reading if they are ready) just to prepare them for the Kindergarten standards they’ll face when they start. I’ve had some parents send their child to Preschool at 3 or 4 and others leave their child here until Kindergarten because they wanted them to “be a kid for one more year”. They entered Kindergarten well prepared.

If you want something that lets your child be a child and worry about the traditional academic standards later, you should find a play based learning program for him, otherwise this is pretty much what you signed up for and what you’ll continue to see.


It doesn’t seem like too much, but if you have concern, pull him out until he is older. Preschool is not a requirement, children don’t NEED it, so if you feel he isn’t ready, just keep him home for another year.

3 isn’t too young to learn that stuff. With the Pleddge you and hin can just repeat it everyday. Fire safety is something that needs to be taught at home as early as possible.

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Things have changed a lot since I was in school 40 years ago. What I learned in kindergarten is taught in preschool classes, each of my kids have had to learn things at an earlier and earlier age (kids 27-7). By the time they are in kindergarten they need to know a lot (what I would have learned in a much later grade. My most recent preschooler had to know how to do fire drills, tornado drills, bus evacuations, etc. While it may seem like a lot they will do well. Also gets the conversation started about making sure you have an evacuation plan at your place if a fire were to take place. Preschool isn’t what is used to be for my 27 or 21 year old or even my 18 year old. My daughter (now 7) could read, write and so much more before she even started kindergarten. She was very well prepared for school when the time came.

Not at all! It is never too early to start teaching fire safety and the fire escape plan. Go through a mock up drill in a few different scenarios. Teach what to do and what not to do when they hear the fire alarm in your home.

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I work in a montessori school and the 3 and 4 year olds are learning to read, write and do math. This is not asking much at all


If u think they push too much now, wait till he starts kindergarten. It gets worse.
Just repeat it line by line with him every day.

Kids that she are sponges they learn quick. He’s gonna be ok. It’s so good for them.

Doesn’t seem like anything excessive to me. By 2-3 years old I had already taught my child what to do if there was a fire or tornado, taught him how to inject me with an EpiPen if I was ever stung and not able to do it myself, taught him how to call 911 from my cell phone, and taught him what to do if we were ever separated while we were out somewhere. The only thing he didn’t know until pre-k was the pledge of allegiance and he learned it within a couple of weeks by saying it a couple of times daily.


I don’t think it’s too much unless they expect him to be flawless at it. I would be appreciative that they are making an effort to give him some experience in fire safety. He’s not going to know it super easily, but in the event of an emergency he will at least have an idea of what to do so that the teachers can safely guide him out of the building.
As for the pledge, just repeat it with him like a poem. He’s not going to have a clue what he’s actually reciting, and that’s okay. It’s just learning repetition at this point and brain training.

I do NOT believe in Pre-K 5-6 years old is old eniough to start to learn to be away from home everyday. The things a 3-4 year old needs to know is asking them too much. Every year these little ones need to know more than the ones before them.

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My 3 year old knows a fire plan… both my boys new the alphabet, all the colors, could count to 30 and could recognize numbers up to 25 by the time they turned 3 and they never went to pre-K ( I’m not paying for someone else to teach my kid when I can do it for free one on one) … kids are smart and you’d be surprised at how much and how fast they can retain things …I don’t think it’s too much… just make sure you practice at home as well double the learning

It’s not legal to force the pledge on anyone.

I thought you said he’s smart and learns quickly? I stand with what you said so go teach him. It’s survival!!!

Right now his brain is like a sponge just soaking it all up

If our 3 year olds can operate a tablet and learn how to use voice control to search for videos on kids youtube because they cant spell yet, then they can learn how to do the things the school is asking. Dont under estimate your child, or they will under estimate themselves when they get older.

As a mom we will always worry people are pushing to much but honestly they can do it… I mean if they have disabilities they may not be able to grasp as quick but he will get it… It seems like alot but you will be surprised what hes able to learn… He may not get every word of the pledge right he may not fully understand what the fire drill is about… But he will get the basic idea of it down… Just practise with him