He is feeling really numb. I was seeing this guy for about two months, and he was so nice at first. He said things like, “I’m not going anywhere, your mine, I’m staying indefinitely, this is definitely going to turn into a lot more, I think we are soul mates.” Then we get into a couple of arguments, he flirted with another woman online, and then he tells me he’s still in love with his ex. He says he is superior because of his race; nobody likes white people except white people…I’m crazy, stupid, dumb, controlling, manipulative, ignorant, etc. He turned into a sociopathic narcissist. I’m feeling really low cuz I did develop feelings for him. I honestly hate dating and being on the market; it’s exhausting. There’s probably no hope in him actually changing either, I just hope at this point I’m not pregnant with his kid. My anxiety is so high, and I feel so depressed. I need to accept the fact that he is never going to change…this is so difficult.
Just run…I was with someone similiar except it took my 3 yrs to leave.
Sounds like he’s bipolar
It’s been 2 months. Move on
2 months? Unprotected sex??
2 months … he got what he wanted and on to the next
2 months??? Girl run.
You have to be really careful when people are making those kind of racial comments. Sounds like he has something against certain people. Please just take care of yourself and know that you are worth it. It’s a blessing in disguise.
That’s a lot of shit to go down in two months
2 months. 2 months that’s all it took for him to show some of his real self. Why the hell would you have unprotected sex with no birth control you don’t even know who he is really. What ever happened to waiting?! I hope you don’t have kids already and allow him to be around them.
Hopefully you are not pregnant. If I were you I would want him out of my life forever.
He played you…run away
Girl you lucked out. Some of them don’t show their true colors until years into the relationship.
Look at all of the red flags, count yourself lucky, detox for a bit, and move on.
Thank God you only put 2 months in before he showed his true colors, some put up with abuse for decades.
Take a short time and grieve what you thought you had and get back out living life. Good luck
It’s really not difficult. Why would you want to be with someone like that? You say being single is exhausting, but isn’t this relationship also exhausting? He is literally racist which is a hateful thing to be and he says all those mean things to you… Why in the world would you even think about staying with him? Like why is is a question? Is that kind of treatment what you feel you deserve? Are you not worth being treated better than that? If your best friend or your sister just told you everything you just typed what would your advice to her be? And it’s only been 2 months?? That’s nothing! You will get over him in like 5 minutes. Get out now before you end up wasting years of your life. And seriously…maybe get some therapy or something and figure out why you would even think about staying with someone you hardly know (2 months is nothing ) when they treat you so poorly. You need to love yourself more and value yourself and know your worth. Don’t take this shit. Leave
Be happy he showed his true colors early on and that you’re not pregnant.
Start reading about narcissists in relationships. It will help you deal with what you’re going through, trust me I have been there
Run from that psychopath as fast as you can
All men say that. Every single one. Only some mean it. You just need to figure out which ones❤️ this guy… he isn’t one of the good ones
Ok… you invested way too much in a 2 month relationship. You have no business having a child with him or anyone else. You need to learn how to pick men that aren’t racist, at the least, and who are good for you, at best. Count this as a win and a learning experience. Make sure you’re using 3 forms of birth control at all times, be single for a good while, and maybe work on loving yourself.
2 month in? Run b4 he gives you a baby n it goes from bad to horrible… you dont wanna be with someone like that anyways, do you.
huh? he brought race into it? Dump him he’s a piece of crap
PLEASE watch “Dirty John” on Netflix. this guy sounds like a predator. they dont seem that way and let’s be honest, pheromones and hormones blind us. But, RUN! I got so fed up that I did not date for 3.5 years. I was fine with it except the occasional longing for something. Better safe than a victim.
sounds like dump to me. I wouldn’t even tell him if he was the father of my child.
Don’t waste another SECOND thinking about this guy. Good riddance. Be thankful he showed his true colors, and he thankful you are rid of him. You are worth SO much more than wasting another second of your time on this guy. Every minute you waste, is a minute he still owns your emotions. Let. Him. Go. Be happy single until you for ND someone worthy of your time.
Only two months? girl you’re blessed!!!
Honestly the only relationship you need right now is with a THERAPIST. He might be an asshole but you seem TOO DAMN NEEDY. You really need to work on that before you try to have a SUCCESSFUL relationship. If you are going through this after only 2 months, what happens if you hit the year mark?
It’s been 2 months and you HOPE YOU’RE NOT PREGNANT WITH HIS KID?? Jesus Christ … you need to reevaluate your life.
I’m sorry that you feel so down. You deserve so much better. If you think you may be pregnant, go see your doctor ASAP. He sounds like a manipulative narcissist… be safe first and foremost. Try not to rush into something else. Put yourself first your mental health is so very important. I’m embarrassed to be a woman right now because of the people that laughed at you. We as women, should be there for one another, not make fun of people. I’m sure she already knows it was a bad relationship, she doesn’t need you all telling her that. Give her something positive to think about… so many people in general are dealing with depression… committing suicide… and you wonder why? Keyboard warriors… probably wouldn’t dare to say some of these things to people’s face. Back to you, the original poster, you are worth a man that will love you…for you, whatever race you are, whatever you love doing…you will find someone special. I think for now work on loving yourself and thinking about what you truly want in a man. It’s ok to set your standards high. That might eliminate men like this one. The thing people hate the most is a person moving on. Wish him well, and start doing you! You deserve it. Look in a mirror girl! Look at the queen you are. You got this. Good luck. Don’t be too hard on yourself! We all pick bad apples in life, whether it’s a partner or a friendship… learn from it.
These posts…sheesh
Get to a pharmacy & buy plan B, get away from him
Sounds like my ex: RUN.
Difficult? Wtf? Have the respect to leave.
After 2 months? Wow that was fast. I hope you understand being alone is better than being used & abused.
Same post in a different
Group so I’ll say again… please use birth control!
Be thankful he is gone, learn from it
So what’s the question? He’s gone good riddance …NEXT!
You really truly did the best thing you could for yourself & your family. Don’t ever regret keeping yourself healthy in mind & body.
GET OUT!!! He wont change. . it WILL get worse!! Its hard, but count your blessing that you found out early!!
Yikes! That has to be some sort of record, he took his mask off fast!!! RUN!!! DON’T LOOK BACK!!!
There’s a lesson to be learned in EVERY situation, this one included. Keeping your guard up going forward might not be a bad thing. I totally get developing feelings for someone quickly and before you have a chance to see their true colors…BUT, if there’s a next time with someone new, keep your guard up for a while and put YOU first. Remember exactly how you felt in this very situation, be vigilant when getting to know someone and don’t let those honeymoon feelings blind you from seeing any potential red flags. Unfortunately you can’t change the past, you can’t change that his actions hurt you but you can make it a priority going forward that you put your value and your worth in yourself. Know that you are better than this kind of treatment and know that you are worthy of true, unconditional love. Write this off as a lesson learned and do some soul searching.
As for the possibility of being pregnant, do some research into Plan B. Call your doctor and make an appointment. Ignorance isn’t always bliss and you’ll do nothing but drive yourself crazy hoping you’re not pregnant, worrying about the what if’s, etc. Be proactive and not reactive. YOU come first and you are worth more than someone who makes you feel this way.
Best of luck to you
It’s been two months! He showed his true colors now move on!
It’s only been 2 months…be thankful hes gone. He sounds like a douche. He showed his true colors very fast, and u deserve better. Sorry hes a dick and hurt ur feelings. Also, be thankful u only felt with him for 2 months, and not 2 years.
You are answering your questions. Let me highlight what you’ve said so far:
- A couple of arguments and he’s lost focus. Flirting with others.
- He’s degrading you.
- He believes he is superior.
- His behavior is escalating.
- He’s abruptly changed his opinion of you.
Suggestions:
- End the relationship.
- Seek and attend support groups and 1:1 counseling to build your self-esteem, confidence and assertiveness.
- Stop having sex with the Aryan Fool and take a pregnancy test or see a doctor.
- Go home or ask him to, but have a couple of supportive family and/or friends when you tell him.
- If he has a key, change the locks. Use a different brand of locks so he can’t copy the key bc they are numbered.
- Block his number from your phone and facebook or whatever.
- Make the change to eliminate him from your life…Yesterday. After all, you said it yourself - he’s Already showing his narcissism and abusive side.
- If needed, look in the mirror when necessary and say, "I am strong. I am worthy, I am beautiful from the inside out, I Love Myself and I believe in myself, Now, Later, Tomorrow and Forever…repeat when necessary with conviction because it is all true.
- Don’t put yourself down and end conversations by walking away with a smile if someone else is putting you down. Remember, you are worthy!
- Surround yourself with people that look you in the eye and listen patiently and are encouraging. Joining groups will help you with this.
Consider joining meditation groups and/or exercise groups to help with your anxiety.
Hope this helps. Sincerely, wishing you all the best.
Did you not use protection? Why the hell wouldn’t people use protection now days? I feel bad about the rest of it all but for $);( sakes! If you’re pregnant, don’t blame him bc it’s you’re body remember so YOU are responsible for whether or not YOU raw dog it with someone and it results in pregnancy! Be responsible! Sorry not sorry…has to be said.
He did u a favor he threw himself away red flags girl move on
How old are you!?! 🤦🤷😂
I would first off handle the issue with worrying about pregnancy. See a doctor, take a pregnancy test, if you’re worrying about him cheating i would be worrying about STDs too. It takes two to tango so anyone saying it is only your fault is ignorant. Look into plan B and discuss with your doctor.
It’s easy to tell someone to forget but it’s very hard when your not in their shoes It takes along time friends and doing thing to try to keep your mind busy but it’s still hard keep your head up
Girl, run, and next time keep your guard up! Get to know someone first! If someone starts off with the “I love you” and “you’re my soulmate” BS they are love bombing you. Getting you high on all those giddy, feel good relationship hormones to get you sucked in before you see the Real them. That way, by the time you do you’re already so emotionally invested that ignore the red flags you see. If you’d kept your distance… and your wits about you, you would’ve seen all those red flags First and not thought twice about moving on.
I get it, dating sucks. What sucks worse, however is to be sucked into a disfunctional relationship with a narcissist or a covert narcissist who will make your life a living hell until they get bored with you.
you were seeing him for 2 months and you’re already in that deep? chill. i hope you aren’t pregnant with his child either, but honestly dating someone for 2 months shouldn’t be fighting and having those types of situations that early.
You should be thanking the heavens above that he is gone. No one is superior to anyone else. You will realize in the long run that you are so much better without him. And let’s pray that you are not pregnant with his child and you escaped a long miserable life with him in yours.
Dodged a bullet there, check yourself
at least you saw true colors before wasting anymore time. An old saying goes “a leopard NEVER changes it’s spots”. God will put the right person in you in due time, for now hold your chin up, kick the trash to the curb and have faith!!
Count your blessings and run. He already showed you his true colors. Dating sucks but mental and physical abuse sucks more.
Glad u safe.Dont let down your guard.Be more careful next time.
Did that for 10 years with my ex and had a kid. You find you are way better off without that poison in your life.
Say goodbye. If this is how he acts so early in the relationship it will only get worse. Call your bestie for a girls night and tell him goodbye. Good luck
Narcissistic trauma bonding look it up . You should get some help it will help you from repeating the pattern with someone new or when he Hoover’s you
You dodged a bullet… you really did
U gotta let him go. And tbh its a good thing u found this out now rather than later. Its hard i know but u can do this
No bad mouthing u but u fell for a guy way to fast teo months u gave him ur all. My advice to u is next time slow all the way down and preserve everythg n ur presence and what’s not n ur presence. Bcus u will know then what u r lookin at. We all mke stupid mistakes bcus I have for a very long time. Now I’m healed and I jis dont see myself falling for him like that again even thou hes still around. I’m not happy w it. I speak from my heart to yours u deserve betta every women and man deserves what they put out not what they dont. And u being pregnant I say take it to The Lord he will show u were to take that. And ask him to forgive u for not following his every demand that he gave to u upfront. Seek self with urself to find the desirable luv. Blessings
It’s only been two months honey. You need to leave that toxic waste behind and love yourself
You know what to do get away from him fast as fast as you can , but I dought you need anyone to tell you that Next the violence.
He showed you who he is now believe him! Put a period behind that! chalk it up as a lesson learned and move forward! You have worth act like it!
Oh well. Move the fuck on.
Just remember…this is what narcissists do. They hook you. And you fall for it because they are good at it. I was involved with one. It took a long time for me to figure out he was making me feel the way I was feeling. Be happy HE showed his colors as early as he did. He saved you a lot of heart ache. There is someone out there for you that will lift you up not tear you down.
What is difficult here? Dump the loser and fast.
I hope you’re not pregnant either you’re both a nuts. He’s clearly a racist, abusive, narcissistic POS and you just need counseling if you’re able to just fall so hard for someone. Especially someone who treated you that way. First time he uttering an inkling of any of that shit I’d chew him so hard his mama out of state would hear it then leave him in the dust quicker than Forest Gump’s run.
Be glad he is out of your life!! Move on… love yourself and know u deserve so much better
Generally speaking, if in doubt - dont. Sort out effective contraception. Remember, if ever in doubt about a man, always look at what he does - not what he says. They’ll say anything. What does he do to make you feel good If not. Run.
Okay… not being harsh but if it has only been 2 months and he’s been spouting non sense about being soul mates and this going on indefinitely, I would have ran, not walked. And I am not being mean but if you are grappling with this so badly and it was only two months, along with some other things you mentioned, you need to take some time off the dating scene. He sounds like a racist tool. Learn to be happy solo and then worry about finding someone, someone who is worthy of your time. You sound like you need to spend some time on yourself, especially since you are anxious and feeling depressed. If you feel badly about yourself you are going to attract the men who prey on that and your kindness. Delete him from everything, block him and act like he never existed. Best of luck to you.
Girl, YOU WILL BE OKAY. YOU DO NOT NEED HIM OR ANY OF THIS NEGATIVITY. NOT SURE WHAT YOUR QUESTION IS, BUT YOUR ANSWER IS DON’T GO BACK. IT HURTS NOW, BUT IT WONT FOREVER AND YOU WILL REALIZE AND KNOW IN YOUR HEART THAT YOU MADE THE BEST DECISION.
He will never change. Not your fault you fell for him during the “honeymoon stage” but now his true colors are showing and you need to adjust. Time to leave him in the dust
Its 2 months. Just be glad it wasn’t years. And yea if he’s showing this crazy now he’s not going to be any better down the line. You’re better than that. You’re more worth it than that.
Pregnant after two months wow
You were seeing thus guy for about TWO MONTHS???Where is the difficulty??? You need some alone time (plenty alone time)
You can’t and shouldn’t give up who you are as an individual and be so enmeshed in his life that it can’t be separated. The longer you stay the harder it is to get out. It won’t ever get better and you can’t fix him. He sees no problem. I could go on and on as i lived 13 years with my abuser, mostly emotional and financial. I promise you, you deserve better and he will just bring you down. Dont worry about dating. You have to heal first. When the time is right God will put someone in your path. God bless you sweety, he walks with you every day. He won’t give up on you so dont give up on yourself.
Rather you find out now than 5 years down the line …Let it go care more about you rather than some twatweasle like him
Girl!!! it was a 2 month sexuationship. Blow your nose and move the hell.on
I don’t see a question! Is it because you already know the answer? Cover your name at the top… And read it as if someone else wrote it. What would be your advice? Be strong! If this is the beginning imagine how it’ll be later.
I’m sorry it didn’t work out but at this point there’s nothing to salvage. I would completely cut him off and go about my business. His words are not something I could forgive. This is why it’s important to KNOW a person before having sex with them, if a man is willing to wait, then that shows he has a nobler character than most. I hope you’re not pregnant but if you are, that’s your decision to choose how to proceed. I’m not sure what you want us to tell you aside from cheer up. Invest in yourself now. Core happiness should come from within, not from other people, they should add to your life, not be THE source for your joy.
It was only 2 months just let it go. Now you know how he is it should be easy to let it go. I hope you aren’t pregnant after this short amount of time because you don’t know what type of father he would be
Don’t hope he changes just get away from him period! He will only get worse and the first time someone disrespects you and calls you names LEAVE them alone.
I know it is sad to hear these words from this crazy man but you need to find distance from him. He is bringing you down and you sound like a very wonderful person. Save yourself, leave now!
2 months?!?! Honey you need to protect your heart a little better than that. When they come on super strong in the beginning that’s usually a HUGE red flag.
Any man that says stuff like that right off is not right…you don’t even know each other …if that bad after couple months dump and run… won’t get better
I’d dump him immediately for being a racist. Racism = unfounded hatred
Do you really want to be with someone who hates other people just because of their skin color? Not to mention the bad example it sets for children.
Time heals all wounds it’s very hard when u had feelings for someone then they turn mean on you. Just try and keep yourself busy eventually those hurt feelings will go away you’ll move on find someone good treat.u right best.of luck to.u
Wow sounds like the guy I was just dating. That’s a true narsasist, they build you up to break you down they are emotional vampires. Don’t let him take your power you must fight for yourself. He will never change he needs to feed himself by destroying others. I’m sorry your going through this he is an animal.
2 months??? This mess sounds like an online booty call that lasted too long. If you want something serious, take time to truly get to know a person. You’re worried about pregnancy but you need to be worrying about a trip to the free clinic to get checked out…Use protection before you put yourself in a life changing predicament girl. I hate seeing women put themselves in messy situations like this one. Smh.
Better to find out now than to have married him and have children then find out who he is. Be glad he is gone you are better off.
Move on he is not worth it it wont change. If this is what u accept now how bad will he be in a year. Women need to stop allowing men to treat them this way. They do it cuz they know they can. When they meet a female that wont take it. Well shes labeled crazy stupid insane. B s. B s. Set a higher standard for your self. Ditch the loser
His true colors bleeding through. Those that put up fronts don’t last. long . Believe nothing that you hear and only half of what see. You’ll go far in life. Burnt too many times.
Why would you be pregnant?? Why would you be having unprotected sex with someone who is almost a stranger?!!!
It was a couple of months, move on.
8 weeks you have been seeing him and you might already be pregnant
Slap yourself, now that you’re awake, listen up, he PROJECTED his insecurities onto you, so snap out of it. Next examine why you fall for someone so quick? Unprotected sex? You really don’t love yourself, time to do that and be alone…when you are happy with your own company and love yourself, you will be ready to go back out there. NO man puts a woman down that he cares for, only boys do. If you like the bad boy, get over it, they don’t change, find someone opposite, you’ll be glad you did. If by chance you are pregnant, be glad it’s not an STD, hopefully not both. This will be lesson learned in a very hard way if so. I don’t judge but there are many options if you are. Don’t rush but also don’t wait to long either. NO MORE UNPROTECTED SEX. it’s a sign of low self-esteem…demand protection or find a good vibrator! YOU are worth self love and dumb these losers. Instead of looking for a man, look at your future and start working toward it, a good man will support you in it, others will tear you down or side track you, KNOW THE DIFFERENCE.
Sounds like you got out just in time. Move foreword and don’t look back.
he did this , he said that, girl plz , what do you have going for yourself except trying to date, be thankful you only wasted two months of your life, being by yourself is not so bad, work on your self esteem
You only knew him 2 months and you might be pregnant dumb ass