I Have Been With My Boyfriend 8 Years… Why Hasn’t He Proposed?

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QUESTION:

"I’ve been with my boyfriend 8 years as of April, we’ve been together since our teens. I’m 24 now, and he hasn’t even asked me to marry him, and when people bring it up, he doesn’t want to talk about it. I love him truly, but I’m not understanding why he hasn’t even at least asked yet. He tells me, it’s because we are young and or give me time. I’m starting to think he never will. What should I do? I’m happy, but what does this mean. I want to be a wife. But, I also want to be like you marry me or else! I’m just stuck, Is my time being wasted? Because, I would told by a friend of I stayed for 8 years, then I probably will stay for 8 more without the ring. I don’t want to leave either. He knows my stands, I’ve been letting him get away with the we are young but I’ll be 25 this year. Mid 20s"

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TOP ANSWERS (AS SELECTED BY MODERATOR):

The following top answers have been selected by a moderator from hundreds of responses to the original question.

"You’re still young. Just wait. There’s plenty of time. Don’t bring it up again and just be happy being together."

"Some people just don’t want to marry. I am one of those people."

"My bf refuses to get married. It bothered me at first but now I’m fine with it. We’ve been together 6 years and aren’t planning on getting married. Marriage isn’t everything. We’re happy. Why ruin it?"

"19 years here… he wants to wait until we have the money for a good wedding and a trip. We have kids and he’s not going anywhere… it’s also cheaper for us to not be married."

"Do you have stable good jobs, a house, a savings account, cars, etc. Maybe he wants to make sure he can provide you the life he thinks you deserve. And before marrying you he wants to get his ducks in a row. I’m turning 29 this year and think back to how much I’ve grown since turning 25. Trust me. We are still young. I’ve been with my boyfriend 9 years and we are expecting our 2md child together next month. Marriage isn’t something we talk about. In reality why bother. It’s just a piece of paper"

"Why rush things? Yes you have been together eight years…but a majority of those eight years you were just KIDS !!! There is never a need to rush marriage and definitely not a time frame or certain age where things must be done by. Like you already stated you’re happy and you won’t leave. Explain one last time to him that it hurts you that the two of you aren’t married by now and then just leave it be and enjoy life."

"You ask him to marry you."

"Does he believes in marriage? You know you can propose to if it means that much to you."

"Some people don’t want to be married. Time to have a hard Conversation about what each other want and how to move forward."

"I got married too young thinking I was in love… that was my ex husband; I didn’t give myself that chance to see who I really was"

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As a male who was single till I was 40, I can say that my thinking was “Why buy the cow if the milk is free?” I’m not insinuating anything, just saying.

He doesn’t want to get married – accept it. You met when you were 17! You have not dated or lived. I suggest you break up and go out in the world and see what is out there. I guarantee you that you are still very young, but that your perspective is limited by your limited life.