I need advice. I have a two-year-old daughter ( just turned 2), and I’m currently pregnant. I am very, and I mean very protective and cautious I only like certain people around her, I don’t want her around certain family members, I don’t trust anyone taking her anywhere without me. I feel like something bad is going to happen, or nobody will watch her closely, and she will take off, or someone will grab her it gives me bad anxiety to the point where I need medicine to stop panic attacks. Does any other mom like this? Any advice or baby steps I could do to help this situation?
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My daughter is 7 and I’m still overprotective. 
My oldest is 12 and I’m still like this… never can be to protective in this day and age
I’m the exact same way over my 2 year old
Been there. Had to go on anti-anxiety meds. I knew my fears were getting more and more irrational so I talked to my doctor. Best decision I ever made. I feel healthy again! Don’t be afraid to talk to your doctor! Having kids changes all of your hormones and chemicals in your brain. Stay strong!
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It may help but I’m still like this my kids are 4 and 5 and I barely let anyone watch them like at all haha
I am in exact situation! My doctor put me on Zoloft for anxiety & depression it has helped some but I am just a momma bear!
You are just a mom that’s what we do my babies are 5 and 3 and I’m still over protected I won’t let them go anywhere unless I am there
Glad I’m not the only one lol but I’m a boy mom. I feel like we have every right to be in this society is crazy.
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I wish I did, my son is two and I have another one on the way and the only person I let keep him at all is my sister and that’s long enough for me to work. I won’t leave him with another soul. Hard to tell who to trust anymore! So much going on.
Mom’s are like this.
This is normal for this time, but do you know of any thing in your childhood that could be causing anxiety ?
Same with my 4 year old!
You dont sound well, maybe some councelling would help you
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I dont have any advice but im the same exact way with my 3 year old son!
Go see a professional
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I this day and time it is hard to trust people with your kids
Yes i am like this with my oldest who is almost five
Yes i thought i was crazy
Wait until you are comfortable. There’s no rush. And stick with only those that you 100% trust and parent like you would 
I definitely don’t think anyone will watch my 2 year old son, like I do.
And it’s been proven to me a couple times that people don’t. He is fast, and curious… It’s so stressful. I just pray alot and, much like you, am very picky with who he goes with.
It’s our instincts, and truth be told, no one can take care of our babies like we do. 2 is a very fragile age… Hopefully it’ll get easier the older they become. Stay strong momma
I was like this with my oldest. Not as bad now but it was BADDDD with him. Doesn’t help that I work in Law Enforcement…I was on Lexapro and it helped me a LOT. It’s not really a bad thing until it start affecting our everyday life. Just please use caution. My son now has SEVERE anxiety and I blame myself bc he’s like I was when he was younger.
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That’s how I am. If someone is watching her in our house then I’m fine as long as it isn’t for too long.
Like when we moved my mother in law watched her, and it killed me being away from her for so long. I know my mother in law would watch her super close of they go out in public, but her not being with me just freaks me out lol
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I have an 11 soon to be 8 and a month old and I have had severe anxiety during pregnancy and after! If it starts consuming your life ( myself zero sleep I would watch him sleep afraid something would happen) I would get on meds! I am on Prozac it’s working pretty good I think second time being on meds other time I was pregnant and had severe hives from my anxiety!
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I’m the same way. I only leave my kids with my mom, mother in law and my sisters. When their at home with them I’m ok but if they go some where I get really bad anxiety until I see them or talk to them. I don’t even like taking them to the store if it’s just me and the kids. With all the human trafficking going on I just don’t feel safe.
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I was like this with my first. Over time I became less anxious but to an extent it’s normal.
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Yep! Same here. I thought it was normal until I explained it to my doctor. I now have an anxiety med that helps me live easier. My fears are there, but not overwhelming.
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I get this way when anyone mentions putting my daughter into daycare.
I’m a grandmother an I worry too much about my grandkids all for different reasons I won’t get into. But I do understand your anxiety about your child. However if you can talk to someone, a dr perhaps they can give u ou suggestions how to handle your fears.
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This is me, you described me. I don’t know why, maybe it’s because it’s my first but one family member is soo not understanding of this and rips me to shreds about it and just makes me feel so guilty.
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Please speak with your doctor. They can help you with techniques to help calm yourself and help you take baby steps. Living with anxiety is not fun and there’s no shame in asking for some help
Nope I’m still like this. I get a lot of negative feedback from people but honestly at this point don’t care anymore. My kids and my piece of mind
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I have 3 kids. They are 8, 7 and 3. I still have a hard time sending my kids anywhere. I don’t like them at my mom’s house, their fathers house, their grandmothers or anywhere without me because what if they fall down the stairs because they all of the sudden started sleep walking (after never having done it before) or what if they get out of the house and no one happens to be watching them and they drown in the lake/river that is in the back yard? What if they choke on something? What if whoever’s they are with beats them? As child abuse seems to be a rising issue! I don’t blame you and I am in the same boat mama! See, people like to sit there and say I am unwell. Maybe I am. But realistically…I am unwell because I care so much about my children’s well being and love them so much that I am terrified one day they won’t come back home to me? That doesn’t make me a bad mom and that doesn’t make you one either. You are not alone!
I’m this way with my10 yr old. I don’t let him ride with anyone or go off anywhere with anyone. I’m scared they will loose him or have a wreck or something.
I nevered worried about my childern when they was little I just trusted Jesus would watch over them but also it was a different time I can understand why you have anxiety over these days
Yes, I went through this. Here’s the thing. My anxiety was giving my kids anxiety. I do not want them to grow up afraid of the world. So I am working very hard on managing my anxiety and learning how to stop worrying about every little possibility.
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I am the same way! My husband told me I’m scaring our 3 year old because I have taught her what to do if a stranger tries to grab her. We have been having a lot of “almost” abductions in our area. It makes me so uneasy to go out in public with her alone. I have severe anxiety about all of the same things you do. I really haven’t found anything that makes this any easier. If you do please share!!! 
I’m like this and I take medication too. But just really focusing on meditation and just facing your fears is what helped me. My bius love going away to aunties and grandmas house. And they do so good! You have to just remember you arent the first person to raise a baby, and people (of course people you trust, I only have the 2, my husbands aunt and my husbands grandma lol) do know what they are doing and successfully raised their own babies and they LOVE my babies so of course they wouldnt want anything to happen to them. Life is too short. You can’t keep your babies in a bubble. But you can take some anxiety medication and self reflection and make it a little easier. Other than that just time. Just time and time again, they keep coming home safe and in one piece.
I’ve been like this with my SECOND child, super weird, wasnt like this with my first. And I’ve learned the more I let myself trust the better I get, baby steps, someone watching her while you’re in the house then as you run to the store, then for and hour then two, the more you practice the anxious behavior the more overcome it. It takes time but you have to have to do it for your child’s sake and yours.
I literally feel like I wrote this post myself I’m the exact same way and have a two year old daughter myself
This is me to a T. I’ve been put on several different things and nothing has worked. Going back to doc tomorrow to see what else we can do
I’m the same way! There are very few people I trust with my babies lol. I have all of the exact same thoughts as you also. My oldest is 7 and my youngest is 1, and I’d like to say my anxiety has gotten better with the last one but it hasn’t lol. But honestly I don’t mind it much because I’d rather my kids be with me anyways. I do let my daughter stay the night with certain people though even if my anxiety is through the roof lol because it’s not her fault I’m paranoid. I have let her go on long drives to the beach and what not with my sister even though it killed me. I think of the craziest things like no one will be watching her and she’ll fall off the pier and drowned, I get freaked out like that even when it’s her daddy taking her to do certain things. Everyone calls me the helicopter mom lol. It sucks to feel like this but I guess there’s a lot of us mamas that are like this🤷♀️
I think its normal for some with maybe a history of abuse! I was molested by family members as a child and have my own fears of large crowds and certain men types and my anxiety was crazy without kids! Then when I had kids it got worse! When you are ready and comfortable you do it on your own time! If anything id start with maybe family caring for them in your home well u run to the store or something!! Mine was so bad Id have nightmares about stuff regrading this!! Example I had a dream back when my daughter was just little that someone stole her at Niagara falls! Well living in New york the schools take them there on field trips! Well 4 yrs down the road or so I get the permission slip for her to go in second grade! My heart dropped and that dream that real didnt affect me 4 yr before ate at me for days! Like I bawled exsplaining to my husband why i was scared to let her go! I was to late to sign up as a chaperone!! Needless to say i fought a long battle in my head before deciding to finally let her go and i think that day I cried and worried all day amd wondered if i had told her everything and if she listened about staying in her group! It was horrible but she came home on that bus with a camera full of pictures and was one happy little girl!
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The people commenting about they “don’t care” they’re just like that… No, that’s not normal. You’re making yourself suffer and you’re going to force your child to suffer YOU’RE insecurities. You need to seek counseling, therapy, something! It’s normal to worry but it’s not normal to worry to the point you’re having panic attacks and such.
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Literally my exact thoughts EVERY DAY!!
I have always had this issue too. My oldest turns 12 this year. I have 6 kids (soon to be 7) and I was diagnosed with OCD with most of my fears being about my children getting hurt.
I went through that when I was pregnant with my second it’s only natural to be feeling the way you are… I got my mum to look after my little one but I still had anxiety about leaving her…
Welcome to parenthood !
Since the day my oldest was born! It’s
Exhausting! !
Have faith and stand in confindence with your decision. There is no point in creating so much stress and anxiety for yourself ( pray over your children and trust that God / universe or in whatever your belief is, is looking after them everyday and that you are being led to protect them )
Choose people who you trust ( communicate this with them ) and stuff the rest.
Omg yes that is me now
I am losing sleep and it makes working difficult and I hide panic attacks
I feel like because of what I have done in the past my 3 children will be hurt by the higher power to make up for my sins.
I even ask for p8ctures of my 3 year old while she is at our friends during the day so I know shes not being harmed and if I dont receive the picture within a minute after asking I start to go into panic mode
I will have random thoughts of my high schooler being shot at school and I start crying and panicking
I have random thoughts of someone snatching my 10 year old away or someone we know either family or friend secretly abusing her and it makes me so sick to my stomach I puke at times …
People always tell me I need to relax or calm down or I am too over protective
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It’s normal to feel that way but it’s not right to instill fear and anxiety in our children. It’s our job to raise them to be independent and navigate this world. We teach them common sense and some street smarts and we pray a lot! My son is 49 and a few years ago took up hunting!!! I’m an internal wreck until he gets back from every trip! Him and his family love Cancun, I bite my nails until they get back! We won’t even mention the daughter who lives out of state!!! We, as mothers, will always worry, we just have to do our job and trust that they, and God, will do theirs!
Just my opinion.
I’m like that. But honestly honey, you gotta leave her once to see she’ll be okay. You CANT live like that. Especially since you’re pregnant again.
Having 2 and being that way will either ease you up a bit or make you soo bad nobody will want to be around you or come around.
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I’m like this to an extent. I will only allow certain people to watch my daughter bc I trust them. Im not to the point of panic attacks but if a situation comes up that I would need to leave her with someone I don’t want to I will get out of whatever it is simply bc I don’t want to leave her. I’ll be the same with my son.
I was like that with my first. He never went to anyones house, not even family, was never babysat or anything, not one time, until he was 8 years old. I wasnt as extreme with my second who is now 2, my oldest is 10. I have lightened up some but I am still a worrier and still only let my close friend watch them if necessary. I had to get medication to be able to function. Now pregnant with my 3rd.
So as you can see you arent alone.i take daily medication for anxiety.(5 children 2 still under age and live at home)it has peaked and valleyed over the last 15 years at my worst stress caused alopecia total hair loss tachacardia and severe panic attacks at my best abke to rationalize excersize good self care etc.recently my neibors suffered a house fire im a traveling in home health provider our house was threatened and my family was escorted from our home.before i got there.i work great under stress helped the neibors co.forted my children…tgen 3 weks later panic attacks started.my advice do everything nessasary to get your anxiety under control medicate get counseling have a physical to make sure there isnt a a cause like hypothyroidism etc.practice self care remember to eat drink sleep.then and only then evaluate the situation with the kids i.e.is it rational what has caused my fear etc.
I concur with seeking psychiatric help to figure out where the crippling anxiety is coming from.
Then read up, contact your local health department, scouts, office of children’s services to find good age-appropriate training for your children to keep them safe. I like the term “tricky people” I heard on here, as often it is family members or people you know who are the abusers. Teaching kids to be safe is an ongoing effort you put in over the years, not a one-time or one-age thing. There are great ideas out there for teaching kids to be safe and ways you can protect them, so put them to good use!
There is even an “escape school” class to teach your child what to do if they are abducted. It is for kids in elementary school.
You will have to let go of the reins eventually, and if you are too dramatic your kids won’t believe anything you say. Start by inviting people you trust to come over and watch the kids with you, then leave the kid/s with those people for ever increasing amounts of time at your home until you are confident they can be trusted with your child (or not). Use “nanny cams” if you want.
Take meditation classes and/or use other techniques to calm yourself down. Read statistics about child safety and other hazards to determine the things you should really worry about vs. those that are highly unlikely so you can loosen up on the fear of the least likely things.
Understand you can’t control anything except your reactions to what happens in the world (which is actually a pretty big thing). Get therapy to learn to be OK with this.
You deserve to be happier and less stressed, and your child deserves a calmer mama. Put in the effort to make life better for all. 
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Me! I have a 3 year old and currently pregnant . My anxiety is crippling.
I was the same way. I won’t let my 6 year old get on or off the bus without me there. She is only watched by family and my 8 week old is only babysat by gma and gpa…never hired a babysitter. It’s normal to worry but not to the point of a panic attack. Please talk to your OB, they can prescribe meds to help with the anxiety.
Anxiety is best treated by therapy. When you can find a therapist that you trust and connect well with, you will be incredibly surprised at how you can learn to manage that anxiety.
It takes time, but all you can do is one step before the next.
Best of luck sweet mama. Hang in there!
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My kids are 19,16 and 14 and I’m STILL like this.
I’m the same way but I do better now then I did when my son was born, my advice is to take it slow have a grandparent or someone you trust take her for an hour only until you get confident in the person watching her more
It’s perfectly normal to feel how you do
I’m like this. It’s hard.
Meds suck but it’s better than fricken suffering
I’m 36 weeks tomorrow with my first child, she isn’t even here yet and I feel the exact same way!
I literally don’t let family watch my children for more than a few hours and don’t go further than an hour away! My oldest also has a severe dairy allergy, so I’m extra paranoid! When I’m not able to sign up for field trips, I have still gone during lunch time and just sit in the parking lot til lunch is over 
Only ppl who have taken my kids anywhere is her grandparents and my sisters and my sister in laws. They know my kids. And i trust them. Personally i panic going into walmart alone with my kids. My husband comes with his handgun and concealed carry license. Its the only way i feel safe. Im getting my conceal carry soon this summer. Each person who is allowed to take my kids know my fears. And they understand my fears. My kids are my world. I fully understand your anxiety. Its totally okay to fear. But sometimes its okay to trust a few ppl with your kids. Just a few. One time at walmart my dad was in the store. We had no clue he was their. He was waiting for me to let go of the cart which i never did. He came over gave me a big hug and said you really do panic at walmart dont you. My sister had 2 boys at the time she let go of the cart and dad their poppop took the cart from my sister playing. She took it as a joke but i would totally freak out. Life is so short. But please take some time for yourself
Wait… This isn’t normal?
You are a proud Mom and all Moms should protect their children in this crazy world we live in.
Very sad for your child to not experience things without you.
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I’m sure this won’t be a popular response but I believe it’s a selfish approach to do this to your children. You are sparing yourself stress and anxiety by restricting your child’s life experiences and their interactions with other people.